Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of SVU. Just the ones I create.
A/N: TW.
Chapter Two
Olivia stood in the middle of Vicki's living room holding her and whispering words of comfort. It didn't seem like the small brunette was going to stop crying anytime soon so Olivia lead them back to the couch and pulled Vicki tight against her.
"It's ok honey. You're not alone." She said in a hushed tone of voice.
Vicki pulled away from Olivia and brought her knees up to her chest. "Yes I am."
"Not anymore. You have me now." Olivia said.
She couldn't understand the overwhelming need she had to help this woman.
Vicki was starting to make her feel things. Things she hadn't felt in years.
Olivia was drawn in the moment they locked eyes at the hospital.
Like a moth to a flame.
Hopefully they both didn't get burned.
Vicki was starting to freak out. She wanted Olivia to leave. She wanted to be alone so she could cut herself. Before she had a chance to try to get rid of Olivia again, the detective stopped her with a question.
"How long have you been cutting yourself?"
"This was the first time in years." Vicki said.
She wasn't sure what made her feel safe enough with Olivia to be so upfront about it.
Olivia was just doing her job though and she had to remind herself of that .
"You could have called me." Olivia said slightly upset.
Vicki grit her teeth and huffed out of irritation. "I know you're just trying to be nice and I'm not trying to burden you anymore than necessary."
"Why do you keep saying you know I'm just doing my job?" Olivia asked trying to catch Vicki's gaze.
Vicki wrapped her arms around herself and shrugged.
"Vicki, do you trust me?" Olivia asked.
There it was.
The big question.
"I want to but I know what this is. It's not like we will talk or see each other again after this is all over." Vicki said swallowing the lump in her throat.
"How do you know?" Olivia asked .
"How many of the people you help do you keep in contact with when the trial is over?" Vicki shot back.
Olivia was taken aback. She was almost ashamed of herself. But she had always tried to keep herself from getting too involved with the victims. She had never felt any of the feelings she was having toward Vicki with the other victims.
"I didn't feel for them what I feel for you." Olivia admitted.
"W-what?" Vicki said standing from the couch and moving away.
Olivia wanted to kick her own ass. 'Good job Olivia, great, freak the girl out even more!'
She stood up and slowly moved toward Vicki.
"What I mean is that you are not just another victim to me...I care about you so much and I want to help you get through this." Olivia said softly.
Vicki couldn't listen anymore. It was too confusing and she just needed to be alone. She wiped the tears from her face and looked at Olivia.
"Could you please just go?" She asked her voice breaking.
Olivia sighed and nodded and headed to the door. She paused and looked back at Vicki, "I'm just a phone call away. If you can't sleep, if you wanna talk or for any reason at all. Anytime." She said before letting herself out.
Vicki collapsed into wailing sobs on the living room floor.
Olivia had to force herself to go when she really wanted to stay.
Fuck you Olivia Benson. Just fuck you.
Olivia released the butterfly clip and felt her tension headache starting to fade.
"Hey Liv?" Elliot called.
"Yeah?" Olivia's voice cracked and she cleared her throat.
"You ok?" Elliot asked.
She looked at Elliot as tears filled her eyes, "I think I fucked up!" She put her face in her hands and her shoulders began to shake.
Elliot got up from his desk and pulled Olivia into a side hug. "What do you mean?" He asked confused.
Olivia sat up and looked at Elliot through red rimmed eyes and tears that refused to quit falling.
"Oh no...the Sayers case?" Elliot asked. Clarifying.
Olivia nodded.
"I knew it .I knew it the day we camped out outside her place and you wouldn't leave." Elliot said.
"I kind of told her that I care about her more than just a victim." Olivia said.
"Liv, she's really fragile right now. What were you thinking?" Elliot scolded lightly.
"I know ok?! I know. It just came out! She was sitting there telling me that I was just doing my job and it made me upset, so I said it." Olivia said.
"It will be ok Liv." Elliot said giving Olivia's shoulder a squeeze, before returning to his desk.
"I hope she reaches out to me. I don't want to be the reason she drops the charges and let's the bastard walk away." Olivia said.
It was 2:30 a.m. when Olivia's phone rang. She lazily reached for it from underneath the covers and tapped the screen. She didnt recognize the number through her bleary gaze.
"Hello?" She answered sleep evident in her voice.
"Did you mean it?"
Olivia sat up a little straighter in bed. "Vicki?"
"Yes. Did you mean it?" Vicki said.
"Did I mean what?" Olivia asked.
"Did you mean it when you said I wasn't alone anymore and that you would put him away?" Vicki asked.
"Yes. If I have to live with you for the next 20 years he will never touch you again." Olivia said.
"I'm scared..." Vicki said. She started sobbing softly. She just wanted it all to end.
Olivia kicked the covers off and began moving towards her bathroom.
"Vicki, do you want me to come over there?" Olivia asked already pulling on joggers and slipping on sneakers.
Vicki's crying was getting louder and Olivia was concerned. "I don't want to do this anymore."
"Vicki? Can you hear me?" Olivia asked again. She was running down her hallway towards her front door, scooping up her keys as she passed the small table.
Decision made. She was going whether Vicki wanted her there or not.
"P-please Olivia!" Vicki cried.
Olivia was backing out of her parking spot amd merging onto the street. "It's ok sweetheart. I'm on my way. Stay on the phone. I'll be there soon."
Fifteen minutes later Olivia was at Vicki's door.
"Vicki, it's Olivia!" She called.
Vicki came to the window and peeped through the curtain. "Press 1479 on the keypad." She said.
Olivia entered the numbers and let herself inside locking up behind herself. She barely realized what was happening when Vicki fell into her arms. She just held her.
"It's ok. I'm here now. It's ok." She whispered.
"I'm sorry I called you." Vicki started when Olivia cut her off.
"Stop. I told you to call me anytime." Olivia said. "Do you wanna talk about it?" She asked.
Vicki shook her head against the taller woman's chest.
"Ok. You don't have to talk if you don't want to." Olivia said. "But can we sit down?" She asked with a chuckle.
Vicki pulled back. "I'm sorry..."
Olivia sat on the couch and pulled Vicki beside her. "You have nothing to be sorry for." She reassured.
Olivia sat there and let Vicki cry in her arms. She would sit there all night if she had to.
As long as it takes.
Eventually Vicki was able to calm down enough to a point where she could talk.
"What if he gets away with it?" Vicki asks.
"Then I'll kill him." Olivia said.
Vicki's jaw dropped. "You would throw away your whole career just like that?" She asked. She couldn't believe it. Of course she found the woman attractive. She was strong, compassionate and caring. She was a catch. But Vicki knew she was too messed up for someone like Olivia Benson. "For me?"
"If it made you feel safe and you could heal from the past sixteen years it would be worth it." Olivia said.
"You don't even know me." Vicki said.
"No I don't but I see the pain you're in everyday and I know you need someone. Even just a friend. I want to be that person." Olivia said.
Vicki relaxed. "I think I can trust you and right now I do need a friend." She said resting her head on Olivia's shoulder. "Could you, I mean would you stay awhile?" She asked meekly.
Olivia snatched a throw off the end of the couch and draped it over the both of them. "As long as you need me."
Once Olivia heard the soft even breathes of Vicki sleeping she let her eyes slip shut. Knowing she was probably enjoying the feel of other woman against her a little too much. She didn't think she could stop herself from where she was heading if she wanted to.