Chapter 17

Upon reaching his property in Scotland, Darcy had felt a thrill go through him when he presented Elizabeth as Mrs. Darcy to his skeleton staff there. He had paid an express to be sent ahead from the village by where they married to notify his household there of his arrival and to have the mistress's chambers aired out and prepared. Now he walked in his own hallway with Elizabeth by his side. He was absolutely thrilled with the fact that she had agreed to marry him and allow him to care for her. He could now give her anything he wanted and it would not be considered improper. He was looking forward to buying anything and everything she could possibly want or need. As he fought to keep from grinning like a fool he glanced at her in concern. Despite his on elation she was now his wife, he could tell she was wary and nervous. Her form radiated with tension and he sensed she was close to fleeing. He paused outside her door to wish her goodnight. When he leaned forward to kiss her forhead he was aware of how she cringed and the quick spasm of fear that crossed her features and echoed from her eyes before she ducked her head down.

"I, I will require a quarter hour to be ready for you. Is that okay?" Elizabeth asked her voice trembling slightly, her face pale.

"Elizabeth," Darcy said gently. "We do not need to consummate our marriage tonight."

"I am your wife, it is my duty to endure martial relations to provide you with an heir," she said looking down. "I will do my best to accommodate you."

"Elizabeth," Darcy said softly gently raising her chin with his finger to look at her. "What are you aware of happens between man and wife?"

Her pale cheeks flushing, she said, "I am a country miss. I have grown up near livestock. I am aware of what will ensue. You will need to," Elizabeth said with a helpless wave of her hand, "and I will need to allow you to. I am prepared, Sir. I will simply close my eyes. I will not fight you off like the men in the post coach if that is what you are worried about, you are my husband. My mother has always been clear a wife's duty was to accomodate her husband when he wished marital relations and to do her best to bear him an heir."

"My sweet lovely Elizabeth. I desperately want to make you mine, but when I said you could choose how our marriage would be, I even meant in this. We can remain married in name only if that is what you want. I will never force myself on you. I love you."

After a brief pause Elizabeth said softly, "I want to consummate our marriage. I would like to have children someday. It is my duty and I wish for a family."

"Then someday we will consummate our marriage. But not tonight. I will woo you first. And when you are ready, we will do so," Darcy said.

"I am ready now," Elizabeth said shakiky. " I would like to get it over and done with, rather then live with the dread of waiting."

"You are not ready Elizabeth. I ask that you trust me in this. When I know you are ready we will consummate our marriage. I love you and will not rush you," Darcy said. Opening her door, he leaned down kissed her forehead breathed softly against it, "God I love you, my Elizabeth," and then gently pushed her into the room and closed the door.

...

Darcy awoke early, througgly aroused. He planned on taking Elizabeth to explore his Scottish estate today, but a little voice inside him whispered that he could explore Elizabeth instead, she had said she was willing to consummate their marriage and plunging into her would be more satisfying then his own hand. He could find out just how every inch of her skin tasted. He could find out what she felt like as she encased him. Darcy was standing and striding towards the connecting door, but caught himself before he opened the door. He stumbled back from the closed door. His lust addled mind urging him on, but the more sensible part telling him that to storm into her bedroom with a raging errection, to lift up her night dress and use the knowledge he had gained in the brothel to ensure she was wet enough to receive him and then drive into her was not how he wanted to consummate his marriage. He knew he need to have a sexual release or he might do something as horrifying as pounce on his beautiful wife when he wanted to worship her and slowly introduce her to sexual relations.

With his hand wrapped around himself he began to stroke himself. he imagined having Elizabeth's small form under him and stroked faster. Afterwards he cleaned himself off. Being married to Elizabeth and knowing that she would allow him his husbandlly rights had driven his desire for her higher. He no longer felt guilty for dreaming about her in his bed now that she was his wife in name at least. He had soiled his bed sheets during the night with his release. He had awoken with his manhood spent clutching a pillow and mummering her name. Even just thinking about her he could feel his arousal stirring. He quickly rang for a bath and requested his bed lines be changed as well.

…

"You look lovely this morning, Mrs. Darcy," Darcy said with a beaming smile as Elizabeth entered the breakfast room.

Elizabeth blinked and smiled shyly back. She had been more scared then she wished to admit about the act of consummating their marriage. She had been uncomfortable with the idea of a man that she was not in love with having intimate access to her body. From what she had gathered from her knowledge of livestock the experience would be unpleasant, potentially even painful. She had rembered the instinctive fear she had felt from the two men in the post coach and her body was convinced it would be the same when her husband preformed the marital act on her. She had regretted her acceptance of his offer of marriage as her body had tensed in fear as he escorted her upstairs so they could retire for the night, but she had known she had given her word to be his wife and that she would simply have to follow through, she could not go back on her word no matter how much she wished to plead with him to help her escape the dreadful mistake she had made. She had always assumed she would love her husband enough that she would not mind the sacrifice of her body to him, instead she was married without being deeply in love. And then he had offered her an oppurtunity to enjoy his companionship without having to ever feel that fear from the coach again. She had been tempted to accept his offer but she knew to do so would be wrong. She was his wife and she had an obligation to attempt to provide him with an heir. She had also been honest when she said she wanted children. The marital act and child birth were merely the price a gentlewoman was expected to pay to have children she had heard matrons say to one another.

"I thought today you might like to see some of the estate. We could perhaps spend a few days here before heading for London," Darcy said. He had set a goal for himself this morning while he bathed. He wanted to set Elizabeth enough at ease that he could kiss her lips. When he had stolen the liberty at Camwood to kiss her forehead she had not tensed up, potentially because she was to tired. The next morning she had not recoiled from his touch outside. Yesterday when he kissed her forhead after the ceremony she had froze in surprise but then relaxed. Last night in the hallway she had been tense and ready to flee. She had been unable to suppress her cringe when he kissed her forhead to wish her good night. Given how the response had been different then the other times he decided her expectation of what would happen is what had caused her reaction. He had also realized that while some of her fear was a result of the two men on the coach post, part of it was also likely what her mother had taught her to expect. In her small community the matrons were likely not taking lovers and the men did not visit their expensive mistresses. In other words there was no evidence that sexual relations were enjoyable for a woman.

"I would like to see it. I never expected to visit Scotland. It would be a shame to see none of it before leaving for London," Elizabeth said.

"Then we shall explore today. If you would rather instead of touring the estate we could go visit nearby attractions," Darcy offered.

"No, I would rather see your estate," Elizabeth said.

"Then we will have a hamper packed and make a day of it," Darcy said.