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As of 5/23/2018 I've fixed dialog grammatical errors and revised the chapter…again.

Gandalf moved past the dwarves, who then crowded around the nearby archways facing the front door. Lucy and Tony struggled to look past them and ended up pushing through behind Bilbo to the front to get a better look. Gandalf opened the door, and there stood Thorin.

"Gandalf," he said with a smile before entering Bag End.

"Who is that?" Tony whispered to Bilbo.

"I have no idea," Bilbo whispered back with wide eyes as if to enunciate the fact that he had no idea who any of the dwarves were.

"I thought you said this place would be easy to find," Thorin said. "I lost my way, twice. Wouldn't have found it at all had it not been for that mark on the door."

"Mark? There's no mark on that door. It was painted a week ago!" Bilbo said. Thorin took off his cloak and smiled at Fili and Kili.

"There is a mark; I put it there myself," Gandalf explained after closing the door. "Bilbo Baggins, allow me to introduce the leader of our company, Thorin Oakenshield."

"Is that supposed to be his last name?" Tony whispered to no one in particular.

"You're surprised?" Lucy whispered back. Tony looked at her with a childish frown as if to say I-wasn't-asking-you.

"So, this is the Hobbit," Thorin observed as he stood in front of Bilbo. "Tell me, Mr. Baggins, have you done much fighting?" he asked Bilbo as he walked around him.

"Pardon me?" Bilbo asked.

"Axe or sword? What's your weapon of choice?"

"Well, I have some skill at Conkers, if you must know," Bilbo said as Thorin crossed his arms. "but I fail to see why that's relevant," Bilbo added.

"Thought as much. He looks more like a grocer than a burglar." The dwarves all laughed before they walked back to the dining table. Thorin stopped before he passed Lucy and Tony. He turned to Gandalf with a questioning, yet stern, look. "Why is there a woman and child present?"

"This is Lucy Montgomery and her brother, Tony," Gandalf said.

"What is their business here?" Thorin asked stepping towards him. Tony leaned up to whisper to his sister.

"Did you tell the old guy my name?" he asked. Lucy shook her head slowly as she watched the two.

"The same as yours," Gandalf told Thorin causing the dwarf to chuckle humorlessly.

"Surly you jest," he said. "You cannot expect me to allow a woman and a child to accompany us."

"Rest assured it will be most beneficial to them, as it will be to you, that they do in fact come along," Gandalf said. Thorin continued to frown and shook his head.

"It is no place for them," he hissed. Gandalf gave him a look. Thorin turned and entered the dining room.

"Way to talk like we're not here," Lucy said once Thorin was out of earshot. Tony walked up to Gandalf.

"How'd you know my name?" he asked as he crossed his arms. Gandalf raised his eyebrows and hesitated.

"Why, I heard your sister say it," he said. Tony looked at him suspiciously for a moment before going back into the dining room and sitting between Bofur and Balin. As everyone else sat down, beside Bilbo, Lucy walked in and stood a few feet from Gandalf who sat across from Bofur. Thorin sat at the head of the table, between the two, and looked at Tony who simply blinked at him before looking at the table awkwardly. Dwalin brought over a bowl of food and a mug of ale for Thorin. When Thorin picked up a spoon Lucy couldn't help a small sharp exhale of a chuckle through her nose as she tried to hold back a smile. Thorin turned his head to look at her, raising an eyebrow in question.

"Sorry, it's just the first time I've seen a utensil used tonight," she explained quietly.

"Ha ha," Tony said giving her a blank look.

"Oh shut up," Lucy said as she gave him a glare which he returned. The dwarves looked between the two.

...

As Thorin ate, the rest of the dwarves talked to him. Bilbo stood next to behind Gandalf and Lucy had moved to stand behind Bofur.

"What news from the meeting in Ered Luin? Did they all come?" Balin asked.

"Aye. Envoys from all seven kingdoms," Thorin said. The dwarves murmured their joy.

"What do the dwarves of the Iron Hills say?" Dwalin asked. "Is Dain with us?"

"They will not come," Thorin said and the dwarves murmured in disappointment. "They say this quest is ours, and ours alone."

"You're going on a quest?" Bilbo asked.

"Bilbo, my dear fellow, let us have a little more light," Gandalf requested. Bilbo nodded and brought a candle to the table, Gandalf stood and unfolded a map he'd taken from his pocket. Dwalin moved a plate out of the way.

"Wouldn't you guys rather use an actual light?" Tony asked. Everyone looked at him. "Here." Tony reached into his bag, which he'd placed on the back of his chair and tossed Gandalf his mini flashlight. Gandalf caught it in surprise as Lucy gave him a scolding look for just throwing it at the poor man.

"What is that?" Thorin asked with a frown.

"It's a light," Tony said like it was obvious. Gandalf looked at the flashlight a moment before pressing the button on the bottom. The dwarves all jumped when the light went on. Fili and Kili exchanged a look.

"Thank you... Tony," Gandalf said before clearing his throat. "Bilbo, would you...?" Gandalf held out the flashlight for Bilbo to point at the map. Bilbo took it hesitantly but nodded. Tony looked up at Lucy with a what-the-hell look and she shrugged. "Far to the East, over ranges and rivers, beyond woodlands and wastelands, lies a single solitary peak."

"The Lonely Mountain," Bilbo read.

"Aye. Oin has read the portents, and the portents say it is time," Gloin said. Tony stared with wide eyes as Gandalf used his finger to light his pipe before blowing out the little flame.

"Ravens have been seen flying back to the mountain as it was foretold: When the birds of yore return to Erebor, the reign of the beast will end." Oin explained. Bilbo, hearing the word 'beast' looked concerned.

"Uh, what beast?" he asked as he struggled to turn off the flashlight before just handing it back to Tony who gave him an odd look as he switched it off and put it away.

"Well that would be a reference to Smaug the Terrible, chiefest and greatest calamity of our age." Bofur answered.

"What's a Smaug?" Tony asked. Bofur looked at him.

"Airborne fire-breather, teeth like razors, claws like meathooks, extremely fond of precious metals—"

"Yes, I know what a dragon is," Bilbo said. The siblings looked at one another.

"Dragons?" Tony mouthed. Ori suddenly stood.

"I'm not afraid! I'm up for it. I'll give him a taste of the Dwarfish iron right up his jacksie!" he exclaimed. Several dwarves shouted and Dori pulled his brother down.

"Sit down!" he scolded.

"The task would be difficult enough with an army behind us. But we number just thirteen, and not thirteen of the best, nor brightest." Balin said. The dwarves started to object, saying things like, 'Hey, who are you calling dim?' 'Watch it!' and 'No!'

"What did he say?" Oin asked. Fili smacked the table.

"We may be few in number, but we're fighters, all of us, to the last dwarf!" Fili exclaimed hitting the table again.

"And you forget, we have a wizard in our company," Kili pointed out. "Gandalf will have killed hundreds of dragons in his time." Everyone turned to look at the wizard.

"Oh, well, now, uh, I-I-I wouldn't say that, I- -" Gandalf stammered.

"How many, then?" Dori asked.

"Uh, what?" Gandalf asked.

"Well, how many dragons have you killed?" Dori asked. Gandalf coughed on his smoke. "Go on, give us a number!"

"Hm." Gandalf didn't answer and a bit of smoke from his pipe puffed out of his month. The dwarves jumped to their feet, arguing about the number of dragons Gandalf had killed.

"Shazara! (Silence!)" Thorin bellowed as he stood, silencing the dwarves who immediately sat back down and making Tony and Lucy jump. "If we have read these signs, do you not think others will have read them too? Rumors have begun to spread. The dragon Smaug has not been seen for 60 years. Eyes look east to the Mountain, assessing, wondering, weighing the risk. Perhaps the vast wealth of our people now lies unprotected. Do we sit back while others claim what is rightfully ours? Or do we seize this chance to take back Erebor? Du Bekâr! Du Bekâr! (To Arms! To Arms!)" All the dwarves cheered and Thorin sat back down.

"You forget: the front gate is sealed. There is no way into the mountain," Balin reminded them.

"That, my dear Balin, is not entirely true," Gandalf said. Twiddling his fingers, Gandalf produced a dwarvish key, ornately wrought. Thorin looked at it in wonder.

"How came you by this?" Thorin asked. Tony and Lucy shared a what-the-hell look at the way he had phrased the question.

"It was given to me by your father, by Thrain, for safekeeping. It is yours now," Gandalf said. He handed him the key as everyone looked on in wonder.

"If there is a key, there must be a door," Fili said. Tony snorted and Lucy swatted his shoulder. He turned to glare up at her. Gandalf pointed at runes on his map with his pipe.

"These runes speak of a hidden passage to the lower halls."

"There's another way in!" Kili exclaimed as he put a hand on his brother's back.

"Well, if we can find it, but dwarf doors are invisible when closed," Gandalf reminded them. "The answer lies hidden somewhere in this map and I do not have the skill to find it. But there are others in Middle-earth who can. The task I have in mind will require a great deal of stealth, and no small amount of courage." He turned to look at Bilbo who looked back. "But, if we are careful and clever, I believe that it can be done."

"That's why we need a burglar," Ori realized.

"Hm, A good one, too. An expert, I'd imagine," Bilbo said.

"And are you?" Gloin asked him.

"Am I what?" Bilbo asked looking up.

"He said he's an expert! Hey hey!" Oin misheard him. Several of the dwarves laughed.

"M-Me? No, no, no, no, no. I'm not a burglar; I've never stolen a thing in my life."

"I'm afraid I have to agree with Mr. Baggins. He's hardly burglar material," Balin said. Bilbo nodded in agreement.

"Aye, the wild is no place for gentlefolk who can neither fight nor fend for themselves," Dwalin said before glancing at Lucy and Tony. Bilbo continued nodding in agreement while the dwarves began arguing again. Gandalf grew angry and rose to his full height, casting darkness over the group as started speaking in his 'powerful' voice. The others stopped in awe. Bilbo stared with his mouth wide open.

"Enough! If I say Bilbo Baggins is a burglar, then a burglar he is," Gandalf said. He went back to his normal voice as the lights returned to normal. "Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet. In fact, they can pass unseen by most if they choose. And while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of hobbit is all but unknown to him, which gives us a distinct advantage." He sat back down. "You asked me to find the fourteenth member of this company, and I have chosen Mr. Baggins." Bilbo continued to stare at him with wide eyes. "There's a lot more to him than appearances suggest, and he's got a great deal more to offer than any of you know, including himself." He looked at Bilbo who looked confused. "You must trust me on this," Gandalf said to Thorin.

"Very well. We will do it your way," Thorin said.

"No, no, no," Bilbo protested but Thorin ignored him.

"Give him the contract," Thorin said.

"Please," Bilbo tried.

"Alright, we're off!" Bofur said. Balin handed Thorin the long contract, which Thorin then shoved to Bilbo's chest without looking back at him.

"It's just the usual summary of out-of-pocket expenses, time required, remuneration, funeral arrangements, so forth," Balin explained.

"Funeral arrangements?" Bilbo asked. As Bilbo stepped back a few feet to read the contract, Thorin leaned toward Gandalf and whispered to him.

"I cannot guarantee his safety," he said.

"Understood," Gandalf said.

"Nor will I be responsible for his fate," Thorin added. Gandalf hesitated slightly.

"Agreed."

"And should those..." Thorin glanced over at Lucy and Tony who had moved to stand behind Bilbo to read the contract. "Children chose to sign as well..."

"I understand," Gandalf said. Bilbo read parts of the contract out loud.

"Terms: Cash on delivery, up to but not exceeding one fourteenth of total profit, if any. Seems fair," he said. Gandalf had an amused smile. "Eh, Present company shall not be liable for injuries inflicted by or sustained as a consequence thereof including but not limited to lacerations ... evisceration ... incineration?"

"What's evisceration?" Tony whispered to Lucy.

"Nevermind that," Lucy muttered to him causing him to frown.

"Oh, aye, he'll melt the flesh off your bones in the blink of an eye," Bofur explained in reply to Bilbo's question. Bilbo looked a little breathless.

"Huh."

"You all right, laddie?" Balin asked. Bilbo bent over, nauseous and a bit pained.

"Uh, yeah...Feel a bit faint," Bilbo said. Lucy put a hand on his back and he glanced up at her.

"Think furnace with wings," Bofur said standing up.

"Air, I-I-I need air," Bilbo said.

"Flash of light, searing pain, then Poof! you're nothing more than a pile of ash," Bofur continued.

"You're not helping," Lucy told him. Bilbo breathed heavily, trying to compose himself as the others stared at him.

"Hmmm. Nope," Bilbo said before promptly fainting. Lucy quickly caught him with wide eyes. Tony started snickering and Lucy shot him a look.

"Wonderful. Nice going, Bofur," Lucy scolded. Bofur hid a smile behind his pipe and a few of the dwarves snickered as well. Lucy easily lifted Bilbo, who weighted the same as a small child, and sat him in a nearby armchair. She sighed and frowned in concern at the poor hobbit. Tony picked up the contract and began reading it over.

"Anyone got a pen?" he asked looking up towards the dwarves. They looked a bit confused until he mimed writing with his hand. The dwarves erupted in laughter making Tony frown.

"Tony, we're not going with them," Lucy said as she stood. "We're going back to the camp site, getting the rest of our stuff and we're going home."

"I'm afraid that's not possible, Miss Montgomery," Gandalf said. Lucy turned to him with her eyebrows raised.

"Excuse me?"

"It is not possible to return to your world," Gandalf said. The dwarves grew silent. Lucy blinked.

"O-Our world?" Lucy asked before letting out a humorless chuckle. "Hang on, you're telling me we're not in our own world? What does that even mean?"

"How is that possible?" Balin asked with a frown.

"It's not," Dwalin said.

"Awesome!" Tony said jumping up and down. "This is so cool!"

"No, Tony, this is not cool!" Lucy said turning to him. Tony glared and crossed his arms. "Mom and dad are going to be worried sick about us when we don't call them."

"Then call them," Tony said going over to Lucy's bag and digging around until he found a phone.

"Tony, I don't think the flip phone dad gave us can cross worlds," Lucy argued. He tossed her the phone and she caught it. "Besides I doubt they even have signal here seeing as they still use candle light." She opened the phone and the light came on but the signal bar was empty. "See?" She held out the phone to show him.

"What is that?" Kili asked. Lucy snapped the phone shut.

"Nothing," Lucy said dismissively as she tossed the phone back to Tony. He caught it then turned to Gandalf.

"Hey, grey dude, can't you like make this cross words like the Doctor?" he asked as he held up the phone.

"Tony," Lucy said in a scolding tone.

"Doctor who?" Gandalf asked with a frown. Tony started snickering which made Lucy rolled her eyes but also had to hide a smile. Tony shook his head and put the phone into his bag.

"Nevermind."

"How do we get back?" Lucy asked Gandalf.

"I'm afraid I don't know," he admitted shaking his head slowly.

"Come on Lucy, live a little, we're being offered a chance to go on an adventure here," Tony said.

"You're too young for adventure," Lucy said making Tony roll his eyes. "We shouldn't even be here." A few of the dwarves actually nodded and murmured in agreement.

"I don't believe that's true, Miss Montgomery," Gandalf said.

"What do you mean by that?" Tony asked.

"Something has brought you both to this world," he said. "That same something has also brought both of you, who were separated in the woods, to the same house and to this company. It seems you are destined to join us on this..." He smiled and looked at Tony. "Adventure."

"This is not a game!" Thorin snapped as he stood and turned to face them.

"I never suggested that it was," Gandalf said.

"You want me to take two children on this journey."

"Ey! I'm an adult," Lucy snapped as she crossed her arms.

"You are of the race of men; that is not saying much," Thorin said. Lucy frowned in confusion.

"What the hell does that mean?" she asked.

"Men rarely live to be 100," Balin explained. "Us dwarves live to be closer to 200." Lucy and Tony's eyes widened. Tony turned to look at Fili and Kili.

"Then how old does that make you two? You look like your 20s," he guessed. The two chuckled but had matching looks of offence.

"I'll have you know I'm 77," Kili said.

"I'm 82," Fili said. Lucy's eyes widened and she blinked. Kili tilted his head.

"How old are you, if you don't mind me asking, Milady?" he asked. Gandalf huffed and gave Kili a disappointed frown.

"Never ask a lady her age," he scolded. Kili frowned.

"I'm almost 21," Lucy muttered.

"You are a child," Dwalin laughed causing a few others to join in.

"Tony's only 12!" Lucy said, desperate to get the unwanted attention off of her.

"And the lad's a wee baby!" Gloin exclaimed and all the dwarves erupted in even louder laughter. Tony's face went bright red as he balled his hands into fists.

"Yeah well ... well Lucy didn't get boobs until she was 15!"

"What?! Tony!" Lucy shouted as her face soon began to match his complexion. "Well, Tony wet the bed last year!"

"I-I did not!" Tony shouted with wide eyes. "Lucy still sleeps with a teddy bear!"

"Tony picks his nose!"

"Lucy's never had a boyfriend!"

"Tony peed his pants in third grade!"

"Lucy threw up at the amusement park in sixth grade!" The two let out frustrated yells, glaring at each other, before they stormed off in opposite directions. The dwarves all remained silent and exchanged glances.

"What – what did I miss?" Bilbo asked with wide blinking eyes, the sibling's yelling had woken him. Kili and Fili exchanged glances and nodded at each other before they each went after one of the siblings. Thorin looked at Gandalf who looked away. The siblings' fight had only helped to prove Thorin's point that the two were still children.

Fili found Lucy outside of Bag End sitting on Bilbo's bench with her head in her hands. She looked up when she felt him sit down.

"Sorry you had to see that," she apologized as she looked away.

"Do you two often quarrel like that?" Fili asked.

"Quar-? Uh yeah... He just gets on my nerves," she said. "He's always bugging me, picking fights and taking my stuff and just... being a brat." Fili chuckled.

"You two may fight but in the end you're still kin, blood," he said before chuckling. "Kili used to... get on my nerves as well, but he just wanted my attention. Dwarves, we start our training when we hit 30 and when I turned 30 Kili was still 25 so he wasn't allowed to join me, and he was jealous, yes, but he just wanted to spend more time with me. Training took up most of my day when I used to spend it with him." Lucy nodded.

"My parents pressured me to learn to drive and get a job as soon as I finished high school..." Lucy noticed Fili's confused frown. "Uh, our schooling system is about 12 years, high school is years 9 to 12." Fili's eyebrows went up but he nodded. "And we have cars... like... carriages without horses that we drive."

"Carriages... without horses?" he asked as he raised an eyebrow.

"Nevermind" Lucy waved her hand. "it's a way of getting around and where I'm from people can't get a license to drive one until they're 16. So anyway, I used to spend every day after school with Tony either playing games or helping him with homework he brought home from school. Now the time I would normally spend with Tony I spend at work and when I get home he's already in bed. It's not my fault that I start work after I pick him up from school. Those are the hours I was given." Fili nodded.

"Our father focused on my training more since I'm the oldest," Fili said. "That probably bothered Kee the most, that I was getting all the attention."

"It's the opposite with me and Tony; once I got a job and started making money my parents were satisfied and switched their attention to Tony, always talking about his grades and sports or clubs they want him to try. He hates it," Lucy said as she shook her head slightly. "He'd probably hate it either way though... did you every have to convince Kili not to do something dangerous?"

"Well, Kili would always want to come hunting with me all the time when we were younger but I never let him because I was afraid he'd get hurt. He didn't understand that at the time he just thought I didn't want him to come with me; he didn't stop to think about the reason why and even if he had he wouldn't have seen it as being as dangerous as I did. I think it's the same way with Tony." Lucy looked at him. "He sees this journey as fun and exciting but you and I know that it could be very dangerous." Lucy nodded. "In a few years he'll understand, you just have to wait." Fili said as he put a hand on her shoulder. "I promise you it will get better," he said.

"Can it get better sooner?" Lucy asked which made Fili chuckle.

"That is up to you." He took his hand from her shoulder and stood. He held out his hand to her. "Let's go back inside." He said with a smile. Lucy nodded and took his hand.

"Thank you."

"For?"

"Coming out here to talk to me. I normally just wait until Tony cools down." Fili frowned.

"Until he gets cold?" he questioned as he tilted his head.

"Uh no, calms down, I mean," Lucy rephrased. Fili nodded. "I guess this is another world. I feel like I'm going to have to rephrase a lot of things," she added with a small smile. Fili chuckled. The two entered the house and Fili gave Lucy's hand a squeeze before letting go and walking into the dining room. Lucy hadn't even noticed he had been holding her hand.

...

Kili found Tony in one of Bilbo's rooms sitting in a chair.

"She means well," he said as he leaned against the door frame. Tony glanced over before going back to glaring at the wall.

"Yeah right. She just doesn't want me to have any fun. She ruins everything."

"She's just looking out for you," Kili said as he entered the room. He took a seat on the bed across from Tony. "You have to understand... this journey we're going on, it's as my uncle said, it is no game. We're going to be reclaiming the mountain from a dragon ...Do you have those in your world?" Tony shook his head. "Then you cannot possibly imagine the danger you and your sister could be in. She's just trying to protect you. Fili was the same when we were younger. It's their job as the older sibling to look out for us."

"Yeah, but ever since she turned 18 she's been acting like she's my mom but worse. She's all responsibility and never lets me have any fun."

"Eighteen?"

"That's when people are adults in our world," Tony explained.

"Ah," Kili said with a nod. "Becoming an adult comes with a lot of responsibility. She's just trying to do what she thinks is right, what's best for you; she's trying to help."

"Yeah well I hate it," Tony said crossing his arms with a pout.

"One day you'll be grateful," Kili said.

"Sure."

"You'll see," Kili told him. "Fili kept me out of all sorts of trouble when we were children and took the blame for most things." he added with a chuckle.

"Yeah well..." Tony stopped. Lucy had kept him out of getting in trouble the past few years. Whenever he'd done something wrong Lucy had either made sure there was no evidence of it or she came up with some excuse for their parents. Kili smiled as he stood.

"Come on; let's get back to the others."

"I'm not going to apologize," Tony said.

"I never said you had to." Tony sat there for a minute then got up and followed Kili back. On the way they passed Bilbo who was going to his room.

The dwarves gathered in Bilbo's living room, smoking their pipes by the fire. Tony saw Lucy sitting in the dining room with her head down on her arms and sat on the other end of the table. When Lucy didn't lift her head he put his down, on his arms as well. The dwarves all began humming, and soon Thorin began to sing, and the others joined him on the second stanza, standing. Gandalf listened from nearby, Bilbo listened from his bedroom, and the siblings listened from the dining room.

"Far over the misty mountains cold

To dungeons deep and caverns old

We must away ere break of day

To find our long-forgotten gold

The pines were roaring on the height

The winds were moaning in the night

The fire was red, it flaming spread

The trees like torches blazed with light"

Old Word Count: 3,494 New Word Count: 4,526