Chapter 26
Having completed his errands quickly starting with following his uncle's advice to get a notice of his marriage published in the papers, he had submitted the announcement and then dropped by a land agent's office to have him begin searching for any property near Meryton available for purchase and had finished with visiting his tailor. Darcy considered going to his club even though what he really wanted to do was see how his wife was fairing on Bond street. He knew with his aunt at her side the modiste and shopkeepers would be willing to bend over backwards to accommodate his wife. His aunt had also, when he mentioned joining them, informed him his presence was neither needed or welcome. With a sigh of resignation Darcy headed in the direction of his club.
As he was partaking of a meal, a gentleman he had a passing aquintance with, Mr. Norton, came up to speak to him.
"I say Darcy, you are one lucky dog. Or should I say horse? Eh, with the way the tales claim you are hung," Mr. Norton said with a chuckle. "You have the ladies fighting over the right to be in your bed. I hear some tradesman's daughter, a Bagley, or perhaps Bangley, was shouting in the modiste's how she received instruction on how to please you in bed. Had any redhead chits on your roger recently? If not I imagine she would be eager to please you. Also heard some tale about you having gotten yourself a wife. Or did you get yourself two?" he said laughing. "The Bangley chit was shouting for everyone to hear how she was Mrs. Darcy not the dark haired one."
"What?" Darcy demanded already dropping his napkin and standing up to leave.
"Say, where are you going Darcy? Is it true? Are you married now?" Norton called out, following after Darcy.
"Yes," Darcy said shortly without stopping.
"But why?" asked Norton loudly, stopping in surprise. "If you wanted to feed a woman cock for breakfast all you had to do ever was set yourself up a mistress or visit one of society's widows in her bed for the whole night. Why get married? You had it good. I have not even heard of you courting anyone significant. Who is she?"
"She is Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy, and mine," Darcy said stopping suddenly and turning around his eyes glittering dangerously as he took in all the interested ears that Norton's loud voice had engaged. "My wife is a gentlewoman. A proper lady and should be treated as such," he said his voice carrying a warning. Darcy satisfied that his message was received, continued out the door. On the steps he encountered his uncles.
"Easy there, lad," Edmund said in concern as his nephew came barreling down the steps.
"Your whirlygigs to tight from being denied release? Tup your wife, my boy! That will put a smile back on your face," the earl said clapping him on the back.
"Miss Bingley made a scene today and I fear Elizabeth was involved," Darcy said tightly.
"What have you heard?" Matlock asked seriously.
"Norton was shooting his mouth off in there about it. Said she was shouting in the modiste's this morning on how she learned to please me in bed and was declaring herself to be Mrs. Darcy. He mentioned a dark haired woman, that must have been Elizabeth."
"Matlock! Darcy! Darcy!" an older gentleman hailed the three. "You may not have heard yet even though the gossip is likely spreading as quickly as any can speak. I will start with the fact the ladies are all fine. Your wife, Darcy, was physically attacked by a Miss Bingley. The footman with my wife assisted to pull her off of Mrs. Darcy. I was a few shops down so my footman, after loading Miss Bingley into her carriage, came to get me. I hastened to my wife's modiste where I then volunteered to find you and assure you I have seen your wife with my own eyes and she is well. Your aunt wants me to tell you that they will not allow this incident to ruin their plans. That they will carry on despite Miss Bingley."
"Darcy heard there was a scene while inside the club. We all appreciate you coming to personally inform Darcy of the incident and his wife's safety, Lord Bramhurst," Edmund said, as Darcy said tightly, "I must go see Elizabeth."
"I will convey you there," Bramhurst said indicating his coach. "She is after all connected to us. My wife may be a little disappointed your nephew, Darcy, Matlock, married her before she could introduce her to any of the single gentlemen in our family. Though I doubt Bennet would have ever consented for any of them to marry one of his daughters."
"Connected to you?" Matlock asked as Darcy strode to Bramhurst's coach.
"My wife's cousin, Sir Nicholas Willard, married her close friend, Merdith Bennet, Mrs. Darcy's aunt. Thomas Bennet was her younger brother, about five or six years her junior. Shortly after Bennet inherited, when he was fresh out of university, she died in childbirth and he blamed Sir Nicholas. He had lost all his family in a few short months. Bennet and Sir Nicholas exchanged angry words and both were of course to proud to apologize. My wife urged me to write a few times to him, since she new Merdith had been fond of her younger brother, but he never responded and that was that. Likley did not even read the letters I sent," Bramhurst said following Darcy.
"He is irrevocably in love with his wife," Edmund said, indicating his nephew. "You take him to her. Freddy and I will stay here and determine just how wild the gossip is. My nephew reported that Norton claims Miss Bingley claimed herself to be Mrs. Darcy among other things. I am sure the story will grow and this is the first place we will hear about it without having to visit the drawing rooms."
"My wife will want to know just what the ton is saying to see how it effects the story of his elopement," Lord Matlock said. Then shaking his head in disgust he said, "Eloping and then potential rumors of bigamy if anyone is foolish enough to have believed the woman that she is Mrs. Darcy. Like Darcy would marry that woman even if she received enough instruction to keep his prick well saited."
"I will take him to his wife. With my wife's connection to Mrs. Darcy I am sure I will be seeing you again shortly," Bramhurst said climbing into his coach.
As the coach with Darcy and Bramhusrt left, Matlock said, "Well Eddy, do you think she only received instruction or did she practice what she learned? Probably saved her maidenhead for Darcy though. I have half a mind to try out what her mouth can do on a prick. You could feel that delicate flower bloom for the first time while you come in spring, or whatever nonsense you said to Elizabeth and Darcy at you estate. After all you are a Darcy, just maybe not quite the one she had in mind to service. You take her maidenhead while I try out the front end, eh? An earl and a Darcy both in her at the same time, she'd probably orgasim from the very thought," Lord Matlock said with a laugh.
"Her womanhood is hardly a delicate flower. More like a weed infestation. Nothing could make me willing to slip my tool into her to plant her garden," Edmund said dryly.
"Especially if more convivial congress can be had elsewhere, eh?" Matlock said. "Here comes Morrison, let's see what he has heard. He always knows the latest best gossip of a certain nature and Miss Bingley going on about pleasing Darcy in bed certainly qualifies." The earl hailed the gentleman and without preamble said, "What do you know about this tradesman's daughter attacking my new niece, Morrison?"
"So the dark haired one is your niece?" Morrison asked.
"Yes, she is Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy," Edmund said.
"Told you I was expecting to have myself a new niece just the other week by the time I saw my nephew next, didn't I?" Matlock said. "The fact that I do you can consider proof my sister acted against all reason like a madwoman and the story from Kent was the falsehood I said it was."
"Makes sense he really married that one if he presented her to his family. You know what they say about dark horses. Never would have taken your nephew for a bigamist, figured he must have lied to that Miss Bingley about marrying her so he could get his roger in her. She must be awful talented with her mouth, because she does not look like the type of woman a man would enjoy sinking into, to many hard angles and a shrill voice. Of course with his prick burried in her mouth she wouldn't be speaking now would she?"
"Despite any rummors to the contrary, my nephew is not quite the lustful gentleman with the sexual appetite the ton is currently painting him with," Edmund said with a shake of his head.
"Darcy does not need to tell a woman he will marry her to get his roger wet," the Earl said laughingly. "He has enough interest from matrons and widows, if he was interested in them. He prefers less drama in his entertainments and keeps things simple by avoiding entanglements."
"Got himself entangled now though didn't he? Ended up with a wife," Morrison pointed out.
"And she is the only one he has ever offered marriage to. And I can assure you a Darcy would not anticipate his vows with the woman he planned to make his wife. He has had his eye on her for months to be Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy. Miss Bingley must have been derranged to claim he offered, let alone married her. Probably jealous. She may have received lessons on pleasing him in bed, but she never even got close to utilizing them on my nephew," Edmund said firnly.
"How many others she practiced on, now that I do not know. Wonder who will all admit they have enjoyed her services?" mussed the Earl.
"Honing her talent?" Morrison asked with a laugh. "The gentleman will be trying out the goods that way before setting her up as a misstress. If she is good enough someone might be willing to take her on. I hear Greghson is looking for a new mistress and he enjoys that sort of thing, and he can always gag her when he is not using her mouth."
"My nephew, Warwick, on my wife's side might like a go at her. Believes himself to be some sort of rival to Darcy. Makes no sense. But if she wanted Darcy that bad he would likely see it has an opportunity to show what kind of real man he finds himself to be in comparison. Won't occur to him that it is no competition since Darcy was never interested in her," Matlock said.
"Or perhaps her brother will have her dowry released to her and she will set up her own establishment and keep herself available for any gentleman willing to pay her for a half hour of enjoyment. Cannot imagine any would want to stay for over half an hour with her," Edmund said.
"Now that would be an amusing set up. A tradesman's daughter going into trade herself. Wait till I share that one around" Morrison said with a laugh. "I'll see you later gentlemen."
As Morrison continued into the building, Lord Matlock turned to Edmund and said, "Miss Bingley will not only be completely sunk in society now from her own actions, she will have quite a few gentleman offering to try her services out, a fitting punishment. Whether she takes any of them on, who knows. She certianly won't find one to marry her now. Especially once Morrison mentions to some one about Warwick. If Warwick hears he will consider it a challenge to have her in his bed when she wanted in Darcy's. He will find it to be a victory if he can believe he made her want him instead of Darcy, regardless of how he gets her there and he has the blunt to pay for it. Besides I suspect it is Darcy's wealth and position she craves. Warwick will pay a tidy sum to have her service him instead."