Chapter 8

Hide me in the shadow of your wings

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Keep me as the apple of your eye;
hide me in the shadow of your wings

(Psalm 17:8, NIV)

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Now...

After three days of Lucifer refusing to answer his phone – it had always gone straight to voice mail – and not reacting to any of her messages on various channels, Chloe had racked up the courage to drive to Lux. She wasn't sure what she would find, or indeed, if she would find anything – or anyone –at all.

That Lucifer had left was her biggest fear and although she was afraid of what was waiting for her at Lux, it was not knowing, which was the worst of all.

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Once again, she found Lucifer at the piano. With his eyes closed and the fingers flying over the keys, he was almost too wrapped up in his music to hear her approach and only realized he had a visitor when Chloe was already standing in front of him.

"Detective!", he startled and the music stopped abruptly. Lucifer's unshaven face looked at her in disbelief. She noticed how red and puffed up his eyes were. Several bottles and used glasses in various stages of emptiness littered both piano and floor.

"Hey", she said awkwardly. Lucifer cleared his throat.

"I didn't expect to see you again", he said quietly. "Not after… " He broke off and looked at his hands. Chloe considered pointing out that he had ignored all of her attempts to contact him, but decided against it, when she saw his face.

He was wearing the same heartbreaking look of rejection and resigned acceptance in his eyes as when he had left her apartment, like someone who was expecting to get hurt and was simply waiting for it to be over. Chloe wrapped her arms around herself and took a deep breath.

"Lucifer, I… I want to apologize to you about what I said the other night", she said. "I shouldn't have reacted like I did when I saw you with Trixie and… I'm sorry."

Lucifer looked at her utterly baffled.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Detective" He laughed mirthlessly. "There is no reason to say sorry to the Devil."

"Yes, there is!", objected Chloe and stood up straighter. "You saved Trixie's life. If it wasn't for you she'd be-" Chloe choked, unable to finish the sentence. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I'm sorry that I ever thought, even for a minute, that you would do anything to hurt her", she said. "It was just a bit too much, okay?" She looked at him sheepishly. "I've been an atheist all my life, Lucifer. Learning that you've been telling me the truth the whole time was… quite a shock, to put it mildly."

"It's quite alright, Detective. I understand why you wouldn't want a monster like me around your family", he said bitterly.

"No, Lucifer, it's not alright", protested Chloe protested. "It's not. You're nota monster, and believe me, I've seen some."

He scoffed and shook his head.

"I'm quite literally the Devil, Detective. Father of lies, evil incarnate yadda, yadda", said Lucifer dejectedly and played a few aimless notes. "So let's not drag this out unnecessarily, shall we?"

"If you're evil, then why did you save my life? Why Trixie's?", she asked. Tears were welling up in her eyes.

Lucifer looked at her solemnly.

"I suppose", he said slowly. "Because I didn't want you to die, Detective. Or your spawn."

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Although it had definitely been a lot easier when Chloe had been able to ignore most of what he said as delusional crazy talk and discard it; in the end Lucifer was still the same person he had been before. Which meant that at times he could be a complete and utter moron.

"And you don't see anyconnection between 'saving someone's life because you care about them' and 'being a good person'?", Chloe shouted at him angrily. Anger was good. Anger dried her tears and quelled her fear.

Lucifer rearranged his fingers on the keyboard and began to play a quick piece. Finally, he lifted his head to look directly at her and said, calmly: "The Devil can't be good, Detective."

" That is total bullshit!", said Chloe, placing her palms on the piano and leaning over it, nearly causing one of the tumblers to tumble. "I don't care what you say. I know you, Lucifer. Not the Devil. You. You're my partner and my best friend and by…" She looked up apprehensively. "...and I can't believe I'm saying this, by your dad, you're nota bad person!"

"But-", he tried to interject, but Chloe wouldn't let him.

"No! I've had it with you!", she snapped and it was as if a dam which had been at breaking point for months finally gave in and drowned everything in a wave of pent-up anger.

"All this time I've known you, you kept telling me how everyone blames you for every bad thing happening and how the Devil isn't evil, he punishes it! You can't just go around rejecting all the terrible things people say about you, only to constantly turn around and proclaim them a universal truth whenever it's convenient for you! 'Oh, the Devil doesn't do X, oh, the Devil doesn't do feelings!' Well maybe the Devil doesn't, but Lucifer sure does and if he stopped fixating on how apparently every single detail of his life was orchestrated by his dad then we could maybe, sometime, fucking talk about them!"

Chloe let out an irritated huff and then flushed. It had felt good, although she tried very hard not to dwell on the identity of Lucifer's father. One piece of crazy at a time.

The part of her that was aware she had literally just told off the Devil curled into a ball of red hot terror, but Chloe pushed it down resolutely. This was still Lucifer, her wonderful, obnoxious, inappropriate partner Lucifer, and in this moment right now he needed a Chair Leg of Truth. Even if it meant she herself was freaking out and screaming on the inside.

"Detective, I..." Lucifer looked at her open-mouthed. "I don't know what to say."

"Good", said Chloe. "Then don't say anything and just listen." Once the snowballs had started rolling, there was no stopping them and the only option was to keep going and hope they didn't turn into an avalanche on the way.

"I'm still your friend, okay? I'm not saying I don't care you're the Devil, because that would be a lie and I'm not lying to you. It's a lot to take in, but I'm trying okay? My whole world has been turned upside down, so cut me some slack", she said and threw her hands in the air. "I mean. God." Chloe laughed. "And angels. Heaven is real. Hell is real."

She had to sit down, her knees having gone weak all of a sudden.

Lucifer watched her apprehensively, not sure if he was allowed to speak again. When Chloe didn't continue he said cautiously: "Alright, Detective. I must say you are taking this way better than Doctor Linda." He poured himself a new glass of Scotch. "She didn't talk to me for two weeks! I thought I'd broken her!", he lamented and downed it right away.

Chloe and Linda had already had a discussion about this and Chloe privately thought that 'broken' had probably been an accurate description, if only temporarily.

It was oddly comforting for Chloe to hear the casual way he was speaking about upending their mutual friend's world, naturally managing to make it all about himself again. Lucifer was being Lucifer. She had missed him.

"Oh, would you like a drink as well, Detective?", asked Lucifer, as if suddenly remembering his manners. He had broken into a wide, boyish grin and was already halfway to the bar before Chloe could politely decline.

Lucifer shrugged and happily poured himself another Scotch. Chloe watched him fascinatedly. Of course she had known he could hold his liquor and often drank strong alcohol as if it were water, but now that she knew 'supernatural metabolism' was a real thing and not a humble-brag, she saw it in a different light.

"Dan knows too", she mentioned, her eyes following the movements of his hands. Lucifer froze.

"And how is Detective Dou- how is Daniel dealing with it?", he asked, trying to appear nonchalant and failing miserably.

"I think he'll be okay", said Chloe. "Eventually. I suppose it would help if he could talk to Linda as well. I'll tell him." She sighed. "This is so weird", she mumbled to herself.

Lucifer nodded.

"How is the spawn?", he asked and sat down on the barstool next to her, though she noticed he kept more distance than usual.

"Trixie's… alright, as far as you can be alright after what she's been through", she told him, glad for the change of topic. " During the day, she's fine but at night" Chloe shook her head. "She has nightmares. She wants Maze to come back and watch over her. Or you. She keeps talking about your bullet-proof wings", she added. Wings. That was another thing.

"I asked Maze not to come to your house for the time being", said Lucifer. "I wasn't sure…" The unspoken question hung heavily in the air.

"I'm not sure either", said Chloe quietly. "She is a demon. I trust her. I trust a demon with my daughter. And I'm still freaking out. Can I just freak out for a bit?"

Lucifer chuckled.

"Detective, you may freak out as much as you want. I'd be happy to answer any questions you have."

"I don't even know where to start", Chloe blurted out. "Linda covered the basics – you know, God", she laughed awkwardly, "– But there are still SO many things I want to know! Are you really several thousand years old?"

"Yes. But don't ask me the exact number, you lose count after a few millennia and the humans keep changing the calendars."

Chloe stared at him open-mouthed.

"Okay", she said. "Okay."

It was probably better not to think about this too hard. Chloe thought about more questions she wanted to ask.

"Do you really have wings?" She frowned, suddenly remembering what he had told her so often. "Wait – didn't you say you cut them off?"

"Yes. They've grown back, unfortunately", he explained. "Another one of Dad's mind games."

Chloe filed this statement away for later perusal. She hesitated before she posed the next question, unsure if this was a path she wanted to go down. In the end Chloe's natural curiosity won out and she asked: "Can I see them? Your wings."

Lucifer faltered, but then he nodded.

„Very well, Detective", he said and set his Scotch down before he stood up. „I suppose if anyone has earned it, it's you."

"Lucifer, no, you don't have to if you don't want to-", she said hurriedly but he held up a hand.

"I know I don't have to." He smiled at her; a genuine smile. "I want to. I'm… glad it's all out in the open now and I'd be happy to show you."

Unthinkingly adjusting his cufflinks, he took a careful step back. Hell was so much more spacious. His eyes briefly met hers before he turned his back to her, letting his arms fall loosely to his sides.

"Ready?", he asked.

"Don't you have to take your shirt off?", Chloe asked in bewilderment and then promptly blushed. Lucifer predictably smirked and she prepared for the inevitable lewd comment.

„I don't, actually. It's all a bit complicated but let's just say that they exist on a different plane of existence and can pass through fabric. Though I am of course more than happy to undress for you, Detective, if that's what you desire. Shall I take off my trousers too?", he asked innocently and his hands, which had somehow already unbuttoned his shirt, speedily moved to his belt.

"No thanks", said Chloe sweetly and he pouted. "Shirt will do."

If she was going to see angel wings, she might as well see them attached to Lucifer's muscular back instead of magically protruding from his vest.

"Well then. Here we go", said Lucifer and flexed his now-naked shoulders.

There was a soft 'fwump' sound and Chloe drew a sharp breath when they unfurled; large, white and magnificent. A pair of glorious, brilliant wings had appeared on Lucifer's back, their size almost spanning half the room and Chloe couldn't think. She could only behold.

Her fingers clasped tightly around the tumbler in her hand she was gazing in awe at the pure white feathers growing out of Lucifer's lightly tanned skin, their divine glow chasing away the shadows of the night.

It was in this instant she knew that no matter what else Lucifer had in store for her: he would never, evercease to amaze her.

„They're so beautiful", she whispered and stepped closer. Lucifer snorted and shook his head.

„I'm afraid I'll have to disagree with you on that", he said bitterly. "They are nothing more than another one of Dad's mind games."

Chloe ignored him and came closer. Without consciously noticing she was doing it, she put her glass down to have both hands free.

Standing right behind him, she lifted her hand, but stopped just short of touching.

„Can I touch them?", she asked and regretted it almost immediately when he tensed up.

„I'm sorry" Chloe quickly drew back her hand and shook her head. „Forget I asked, I know it's painful for you-", she stammered but Lucifer cut her off.

„No. It's fine, Detective. Go on", he said quietly, relaxing his back and shoulders, the wings drooping slightly.

„Really?" She wanted to be sure.

„Never lying. You know that... Chloe", he said wryly and took a swig from his scotch.

„No. You don't", she said sincerely and, once more, reached out towards Lucifer's back.

"It's not like I mind having a beautiful woman touch my naked body, Detective", he said.

Trust Lucifer to ruin an intimate moment with a sexual joke because he was incapable of dealing with any kind of emotional vulnerability.

Chloe held out her hand again and this time her fingers brushed against the brilliant white feathers of his right wing. Lucifers' eyes fluttered shut at the light touch.

"Careful with the primaries", he said. "Their tips can be rather...sharp!" He almost gasped the last word when Chloe slowly ran a hand along the upper ridge. Its very tip was covered in adorably tiny, soft, fluffy feathers. The wing itself was unexpectedly warm. She could feel the slight movements of muscles under her fingers and only now did it sink in that they were an actual, whole, additional limb, alive and moving. To think Lucifer had cut them off, just like that.

"Primaries?", she asked, when his words reached her with a delay, and knit her brow. She didn't know a thing about the anatomy of feathers. Were they numbered? The feathers slightly lower were stiffer than Chloe would have expected, although when she ran her hand in the direction of growth they still felt smooth as silk. The limb tensed but she could feel Lucifer slowly relax as her hand moved along the wing.

"The long ones at the bottom", explained Lucifer. His eyes were closed, his head tilted back slightly and he was pressing the scotch glass to his chest.

Chloe lifted her other hand as well, touching the left wing and mimicking the motions she was making on the right one. She leisurely stroked both wings down from top to bottom.

"I thought they would be softer", she whispered, her voice full of wonderment. "I mean, no, they are soft, really, really soft, they feel like a cloud but... the larger ones are kind of stiff" She laughed. "I didn't know that." When her brain caught up, she shot Lucifer a look but he didn't comment on her choice of words, merely stood there with his lips slightly ajar before he said: "Go deeper." His voice was uncharacteristically raspy.

Chloe complied. Her mouths formed a barely audible 'oh' when she went beyond the outer layer of flight feathers and reached the fine down underneath. She had never touched anything so soft in her life. Not in her wildest dreams could she have imagined the feeling. Chloe dug her fingers into the velvety magnificence and ran them through the feathers from where Lucifers' wings met his back to as far as her arms span permitted it, unthinkingly nuzzling against his back.

She slowly dragged her hands back again and traced where the wings met his shoulder blades. Lucifer winced and drew a sharp breath. Chloe startled and pulled her hands away instantly.

"I'm sorry", she breathed. "Did I hurt you? Do you want me to stop?"

"No", Lucifer blurted out. "You haven't hurt me, Chloe", he said softly and exhaled audibly. She noticed that his breathing was coming ragged and uneven and hoped that he had told her the truth. Perhaps his wings had been injured in the shooting after all. Lucifer swallowed. "Nobody has touched me like this in a very long time. It's... I'm sorry" He abruptly folded his wings back into whatever pocket dimension he stored them in and rolled his shoulders. "I think that's enough for tonight." Lucifer quickly downed the rest of his drink, before donning his shirt again.

"Will I see you at the precinct tomorrow?", he asked hesitantly and, perhaps, hopefully. He did not turn to look at her, focusing instead on buttoning up his shirt.

"Oh, uh, yeah. Sure", said Chloe slightly dazed. "Back to work."

"Splendid", said Lucifer and even though she couldn't see his face, she heard the relief in his voice. "I'm glad you still want to work with me, Detective. I value our friendship very much and losing it would have been… " He trailed off, still not turning around.

Chloe stepped up to him and put a hand on his arm.

"Hey", she said and smiled at him. "Devil or not – you're still the best partner I ever had."

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A/N: In all honesty, I'm not really satisfied with this chapter. I actually had the wing reveal bit written before the rest of the story. It was sort of a random standalone without any background, but when I started Innocent's Prayer I reworked it slightly because it thought it would go well in there. Well, in the end it turned out rather wingporn-y *delicate cough* so I removed those parts on the grounds that it wasn't a good fit with the sad/melancholic tone of the rest. But then the chapter was too short and felt like it was lacking something... *sigh* I don't know. What do you people think - should I have ended on "It was in this instant she knew that no matter what else Lucifer had in store for her: he would never, ever cease to amaze her." or do you like the wingporn-y bit? :-/