Disclaimer: I do not own Sword Art Online or Deadpool. Both are owned by their respective owners.
''Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr.''
Argo stared, surprised at the sudden outburst of song from her red-wearing companion, yet was smart enough not to ask any questions. One who wasn't that smart though, was the black-haired player stepping in front of her as he asked, ''Isn't that supposed to be sung when someone is sick?''
''Yeah, that's why I'm singing it. OP caught a cold and has been down for at least two weeks now.'' Deadpool explained, Kirito still not sure who the Merc in Red was referring to.
Not that he wanted to know that information either, for the new city called Rovia required his fullest attention. Especially when their method of travel wasn't your everyday routine, jumping from gondolas to the other sides of the canals. By the time they reached the teleporter in the main plaza, Argo had already left to investigate the city and its rich secrets.
''So, what now?'' Kirito turned to his companions once he had finally activated the teleporter to the next floor. Or harassed it… depending on how one chooses to see it.
''Why not take a trip on the gondola until Argo comes back with some information?'' Asuna suggested, her eyes slightly sparkling despite her tiredness.
''Sure, that sounds like a plan. What do you think…? DP?'' Kirito trailed off as there was no trace of the Merc in Red that had stood at his side just a second before.
Before he could worry, he heard the sound of a splash, followed by an angry foreign shout, one unfamiliar to Kirito. On a gondola stood a man with black pants, a white and black striped shirt, a moustache that was definitely fake – poorly concealing a trademark red suit.
''Deadpool-san, what are you doing?'' Asuna asked as she ignored the NPC, who was mumbling to himself as he swum towards one of the stairs that led to the sides of the canals.
''Who is this Sir Deadpool you speak off, Bella Signorina?'' the Merc in disguise asked with an Italian accent. ''It does not matter. Could I do you a favor with a trip through this glorious city? Although, it seems you already have quite a fine partner to accompany you.'' Deadpool smiled as he stared at the flabbergasted black-haired swordsman.
Kirito couldn't even open his mouth before Asuna stepped onto the gondola and answered, ''Yes. Ticket for two please.'' She stared at Kirito with an urgent plea, earning a sigh as he entered the gondola as well.
Hazel eyes and a bright smile stared with delight at the beauty of their surroundings; the chalk-white buildings made a perfect addition to the already romantic setting that was Rovia.
Kirito did not have a clue what to do. He had certainly noticed the subtle change in his chestnut-haired partner but did not know how to handle it. And it definitely helped that Deadpool was whistling innocently behind them, rowing in a slow but gentle pace.
Dammit, DP. Row faster! Kirito's thoughts were mirrored in his facial expression and were picked up by the Disguised Merc all too well. Deadpool, however, just ignored it and even began to sing softly. Again.
''La Donna è Mobilé. Qual piuma al vento.
Muta d'accento, E di pensiero.
Sempre un amabile, Leggiadro viso.
In pianto o in riso, è menzognero.''
[You know this isn't a love song right?] {Who cares? They don't know!} Well, they do now.
They being a player, taken aback by the view, who had unintentionally shuffled a bit closer to Kirito, who didn't know what to do and was too tired to think of a way out without hurting anyone and last, but not least, the Merc enjoying himself by mimicking the Chant skill.
Hm, I just got an idea. Deadpool stated internally before looking at his HUD and stating again internally, Perfect timing!
Argo had returned quicker than expected from her investigation, readying all the secrets she had discovered from the city in only three hours. They were all basic knowledge for the two beta players, yet there was a quest that she could not figure out.
In the northwest of the city, there was a simple house where an old NPC man lived. Argo had no idea how to activate it and asked the trio to investigate.
Kirito, the genius he was, had finally figured it out, and so started the quest -The Shipwright of Yore-, the only way to create a boat for your own on this breathtaking floor. {Right…}
The collection of the wood could have been done very shortly, yet Kirito wanted to earn the materials fair and square this time. The problem was Asuna agreed, so this time, the trio decided with a divergent vote that they would get the resources from the Bear Forest.
How Deadpool was now riding on the back off the giant fire bear, Magnatherium, in that same forest, none of them knew and none of them asked. ''DP, lead it this way!'' Kirito shouted, trying to make the large grey bear tackle a tree.
''A little busy here, pal! Stop eating my swords, you stupid teddy bear!'' Deadpool yelled as he plunged another sword into the skin of the giant bear, his seventh sword already vanishing due to its harsh nature.
The giant bear crashed into multiple trees and by the time it vanished into oblivion, the three players were panting heavily, their inventory full of Wood, Bear Fat and more of that stuff.
The darkness being a clear signal of how late it was, the quartet decided to catch some sleep before tackling the quest again. All in a separate room, Deadpool held tightly onto a teddy bear he was finally able to summon with his skill.
''Thank you for bringing the materials.'' the NPC Romolo said, the shipbuilder of the quest the quartet was undertaking. ''Please tell me how you would like your boat to be designed.''
A menu appeared in front of Kirito, who was assigned as the party leader of the group. The moment he told his partners the menu was in front of him, the other three surrounded him, the girls at each of his sides and Deadpool from behind, insisting he would make the menu visible for everyone to see.
Feeling a bit more rested than before, yet not too well due to the short three-hour nap, Kirito decided to stay out of the creation of the new boat. That was for the better because the three players in front of him couldn't agree on a single thing.
''No, we are not making it red and black with a bunny sign! And we are also not changing it to a rat.'' Asuna shook her head at the two with her.
''Party pooper.''
''Can we at least get a name for her?'' Argo asked impatiently.
Kirito, asking the obvious question, joined back in, ''Why would you call a boat a female?''
''Well, there are a thousand reasons, Kii-bou.'' Argo started, only for Deadpool to continue.
''Where do I start… let's see… Oh yes! There is always a great deal of bustle around her, usually a gang of men around her. Her rigging cost's more than her hull and it takes a lot of paint to keep her looking good. It is not the initial expense that breaks you, it's the upkeep; she can be all decked out. It takes an experienced man to handle her correctly and without a man at the helm, she is absolutely uncontrollable. She has her topsides, hides her bottom and last but not lease, when coming into port, she always heads for the boys.''
[Thank you, Densa Tanker.]
{Women might be triggered!}
Shit…
Asuna slapped Deadpool into one of the walls of the house while Argo corrected the Merc. ''Nope. The truth is the first sailors where male and saw their ship as partners. At least, this is one belief, just one of the many reasons why it could be. Anyway, do you know a good name for the boat, Kii-bou?''
Kirito gave it a quick thought before answering with, ''How about Tilnel?''
''Kii-chan sister? Great idea Kii-bou! And maybe we should make it the colors of the dark elves, with their symbol.'' Argo suggested.
''Sounds lovely.'' Asuna stared violently at the confused Merc in Red. ''I am sure we can all agree on it.''
''Fine, but the next time we are making a red-black bunny ship,'' Deadpool groaned as he gave in.
The remaining part of the designing was done before it even began. The ship was a five-seater, [One for Kizmel of course.] {Those naïve idiots.} and was armed with additional Fire Claws for a setting only Deadpool knew the purpose of. When the entire design was done, Romolo stepped out of the room and made a sketch. Accepting the boat's design, Romolo finally started to work on it in the back of his house.
''What now?'' Asuna asked.
Deadpool immediately answered, ''Well, I have something important to do, so I will see you guys when the boats are ready. I do believe someone has to stay in here in case someone else comes in and resets the entire thing, so… Bye bye!''
Before Kirito could process those words and shout something along the lines of, ''You bastard!'' both Deadpool and Argo had already taken their time to get out of the house. He was expecting to stand in the house alone and thus was visibly surprised when he was not the only one left.
''So, we must wait until the boat is ready. Mind if I take the chair to catch some sleep?'' Asuna gazed longingly at the large green chair where Romolo had sat before the quest began.
''Yeah, no problem,'' Kirito answered shortly, feeling tired despite the nap that he had earlier. Searching the room for a place, other than the chair, to find some sleep, Kirito could not find another piece of furniture to sleep on.
Noticing the shift in his eyes, Asuna piped up, ''The chair is big enough for the two of us. We can sleep sideways.'' [Now you are just copying progressive.] {Be creative, you magnificent bastard!}.
''Sure, thank you,'' Kirito instantly accepted, settling himself with his back against Asuna. And despite having just slept for three hours, sleep was coming to him quicker than he had expected.
''Now, I am sure what all of you beautiful bastards think, what is Deadpool going to do? And why the hell are we on the first floor once again? Not so quick, you bloody idiots. Have to wait to make sure not to spoil the surprise.'' Deadpool teased as he followed the mysterious wind [OP] through the crampy alleys of the Town of Beginnings.
He was moving through it surprisingly well. Jumping from one street, with his agility, off a wall before teleporting once just to jump from a roof - Assassins Creed style. The landing was unfortunately not in a pile of hay as the purple message of the Crime Prevention Code was clearly visible on Deadpool's landing place. Or in this case, his face.
''What are you talking about? I landed superhero style, you idiot.''
[Now, who are you going to believe?].
Turning another corner, he noticed a few players training their swords skills on walls while others were too busy working on their support skills. Crafters, blacksmiths, boys with weapons that just didn't fit them - due to Deadpool's actions. He even noticed a female brown-haired blacksmith {Liz?} but refrained from moving down this path and continued to follow the mysterious path of the wind.
''This is getting boring quite quickly. Don't get me wrong, more parkouring action is cool! But make me jump through windows! Let me crush walls or something! And why the hell is this city so big?!'' Deadpool asked himself as he still maneuvered skilfully through the hallways.
Thinking back to the singing he had done in his time in Aincrad, Deadpool remembered that in his Manual for Dummies, there was another player very well known for using the Chant skill. And since they were close to the sixth floor by now, he could persuade her to help him.
''You mean that white-haired girl from the movie, right? What was her name again…? Luna? Panu? Nauy?'' Deadpool once again muttered to himself, the wind moving him slowing down to an extent. Standing before him was an inn he was not familiar with, yet Deadpool's attention was shifted to a pop-up in his menu.
Pressing the -!- in the top right corner, his menu popped up in front of him, again with an orange line surrounding the option he had to continue in. Finally arriving at his inventory, he summoned the large book and began reading.
Fortieth floor… Prison floor…. Mysterious chantress… Asuna likes Kirito… Kirito is still depressed about the cats… Some loser called Nautilus {Who in his right mind would call himself that?}… A songstress saving the day by sacrificing herself…. Oh yeah, that was her name. Oh, that was the whole history of Ordinal Scale. Never understood that movie. [But Jesus-kun and Asuna were magnificent in it.]
''Well, we have a quest: to save as many players as possible in this game. Might as well start early with this one.'' Finally making up his mind, Deadpool entered the inn and thought of a way to get the attention of its inhabitants.
That, however, wasn't necessary. [Oh…] {We had something amazing planned!} For the player Deadpool was looking for came down the stairs herself. Wait, how late is it again? [I thought it was dark?]. {Then what were all those bloody idiots still doing training their skills and what is she going to do this late an hour?}.
Can you shut up for a second?! Just focus!
…
''Did he just respond?'' Deadpool asked, the brown-haired girl that had just passed stopping before staring confoundment at the Merc in Red.
[I think he did.]
{This is glorious. We need to savor this moment.}
That, however, wasn't possible for a voice behind him asked with concern, ''Who are you referring to, Sir?''
Turning to the source of the voice, which was the brown-haired girl called Yuna, {We knew that already.} Deadpool coughed once before stepping forward, catching the worried hand of Yuna in both his hands and stating enthusiastically, ''I found my songstress.''
If Aincrad would have allowed crushing of walls by collision, Deadpool would have destroyed two walls already unwillingly. The first on the fourth floor, the second by the hand of a girl that was anything but fragile.
Many players decided to leave the place and thus only Deadpool and Yuna remained in the inn, Deadpool grinning as the purple window on the wall began to disappear. ''Nice bitch slap. Sorry about that. Had to make another reference. The name is Sir Deadpool. You must be Yuna.''
Yuna gave a thorough look up and down at the Merc in Red, which Deadpool happily accepted, even posing in a muscular stance before she said, ''You are that strange red-clothed player everyone is talking about. The one that fights on the frontline. What do you want?''
''Okay, maybe we started off the wrong foot here. I heard some rumors about someone that was talented with a flute and I wondered if you were interested in another skill that would help your music career.''
Yuna, angry and disgusted, seemed to ease a bit as she curiously asked, ''What is in it for you? What do you expect in return?''
''I like it! Just as much flair and spirit as Asuna and Argo. Now, what do I want in return? I know, let me train you and join me and my friends on the front line!'' Deadpool stated enthusiastically.
Yuna had already drawn at least four facial expressions in that short conversation, from concern to anger, to disgust, to embarrassment and straight up confoundment. ''Help you on the front line? I am not even strong enough yet. And it is not like I can do something with how I am now.''
Stop making her give those annoying answers and just let her come with me, OP!
''I disagree.'' Deadpool started, Yuna staring surprised at him. ''Judging from your items, you have been training your skills as well. Dagger skill I assume.'' Yuna shakily nodded her head in confirmation and Deadpool continued, ''But you are indeed no front-line material yet. Then why do I ask that you join me? No one begins with a flute skill in a game of death. It must mean they are talented enough - or do have a passion for it.''
After taking a breather, [And making sure not to add too much text in one go] Deadpool continued, ''The current frontline is strong but only because we are still high-spirited. If we find a bump in the road, which will eventually happen, then that morale will drop and we will be weak-spirited again. So, with that thought of progress, I hoped you could take that position and help us keep morale high.''
Yuna crossed her arms, closing her eyes to think for a moment before concluding, ''So you come here for the clearing of the game. What can I expect when I do join you?''
''Anything you want,'' Deadpool stated confidently as he summoned a flute and a beautiful white dagger from behind him. ''Plus, a lovely adventure. Also, you can skip a few missions on the dark elf campaign. I can say this is an offer you can't refuse.'' Deadpool ended with his best impression of the godfather.
''Watch out!'' Argo shouted as the Tilnel almost crashed into the quay. ''Sheesh, get your head in the game, Kii-bou.''
''This is not as easy as it looks.'' Kirito retorted, doing his best to pull the Tilnel straight with its row. After almost crashing at least three more times, the party of now five were finally in the clear and began to explore the wilderness of the fourth floor, while the beautiful sound of a flute started to play.
''A warm morning-sun with almost no wind while sailing through a river and listening to such soothing sound. What more can one wish for?'' Deadpool sighed as he laid rested on the extra seat [because no one had considered the gondolier wasn't included in the deal] with his hands behind his head.
''To have a better helmsman is one thing.'' Asuna said as she was still worried for the health of her beloved boat, an offended Kirito trying his best to ignore that statement. ''To get out of the game is another.''
''Party pooper. Can't you just enjoy the ride?'' The Merc in Red retorted, Asuna ignoring him. Yuna was enjoying the ride as well while Argo had her eyes closed and listened with a smile to the delightful music.
Before Argo could ask a question, a giant blue Scuttle Crab spawned from their left and Kirito bashed the Tilnel with its powerful bow into the newly spawned monster. Asuna immediately targeted the beast with -Parallel Sting- before Deadpool teleported onto its head and pierced it with two Annual blades +8.
The crab shattered shortly after, Yuna too receiving experience for this encounter. ''How did I earn any experience? I didn't even help to defeat it!''
''Not sure, but it is quite interesting. Maybe we could use it to train weaker players? What do you think, Kii-bou?'' Argo asked, staring at her gondolier.
''Maybe with a 10-person boat and five tanks, that could be an option. I highly doubt that Kayaba would leave such a thing untouched.'' Kirito answered.
''True. Kayaba would nerve the heck out of it the moment people try it and it becomes well known. If he wanted to make things easier, he could have done it much easier.'' Deadpool complemented.
''Like?'' Asuna asked.
''Well, achievements are one thing. Now, the only way to level up is to fight monsters and to risk your life, which will stop a lot of players from participating in this world and what it has to offer. However, award a player by completing a number of quests, crafting something new or earning another skill and even the people at the beginning will do their best to get the most out of their virtual lives.''
Argo stared surprised at the Merc in Red before suggesting, ''You should lay that idea in front of Kayaba. I assume he still observes this world and with the shit you have been doing the last few weeks, I am sure he is observing you.''
''Argo please. Stop praising that already too inflated ego. Only a few more compliments and it will explode.'' Asuna stated dryly, Yuna sniggering before she focused her attention back to her flute.
And so the almost full party of five continued their trip through the wilderness, all openly, or secretly, enjoying the view that stood around them.
The quest -The Shipwright of Yore- naturally did not remain a secret that only the five players knew and two days after their first trip through the rivers of the fourth floor, the other groups of the front line had created ships for their own.
The fact that the Aincrad Dragon Alliance had six ten-player ships and that the two groups were strengthened by the four-man squad and their ship called the Pequod, was the solid reason that the two-headed turtle field boss was defeated so quickly. Especially when Deadpool kept on piercing and slashing away at its head the entire time. [No reference this time.] {We're ashamed as well.}
After taking a short break in the next town, the players entered a mysterious fog and at least two players had their breath taken away by the beauty of the castle that appeared a moment later.
''It is as beautiful as it was in the beta. Isn't that right, Kii-bou?'' Argo asked both grinning and showing to be still impressed by the familiar castle in front of her.
''Absolutely,'' Kirito answered back with a childish smile.
A combination of nervousness and excitement had Yuna at her mercy and without asking any questions, she followed Kirito, Asuna and Deadpool. Her nerves took over when the guards asked for identification and her excitement took over when she stood in the beautiful courtyard of Yofel Castle.
''This is so beautiful.'' Yuna's eyes sparkled as she let out her wonder.
Those sparkles disappeared though as she was snapped out of her daze when an unknown woman's voice answered, ''Thank you for your sincere words.''
Five sets of eyes shifted to that voice, the source being a beautiful purple-haired dark elf with a well fitted purple dress, no trace of her usual saber, shield or armor at all.
''Kizmel!''
''Ki-chan!''
With astounding agility and impressive leaps, both Argo and Asuna had their arms around the dark elf. Kizmel smiled brightly as she returned the hug to both of them. She smiled at Kirito, gave Deadpool a welcoming nod [Hey, it is something] and shifted her attention to the brown-haired girl. ''Sorry for frightening you. I have yet the pleasure in meeting another partner of my friends so let me introduce myself. My name is Kizmel, member of the Pagoda Knights, from the kingdom of Lyusula.''
Yuna's mixed expressions of fear and excitement returned to confoundment and excitement as she replied, ''My name is Yuna. A pleasure to meet you, Kizmel-san.'' While Kizmel let the players inside, Yuna asked Argo in a hushed whisper, ''What was that? I know you said you had an NPC companion but how could she react so well to me?''
Argo grinned, ''You have seen nothing yet, Yu-chan.''
And for the next five hours, Yuna could indeed confirm why Argo said she hadn't seen all there is to see. Reacting to every question Yuna sent Kizmel's way and occasionally returning a question as well as showing interest in the flute skill. That, in combination with Deadpool's magic and strange mimics, [No woman of culture I see.] had Yuna laugh, be embarrassed and enjoy her evening a lot more than she had ever expected.
How she ended up in a large mixed bath with a light-blue swimsuit on made by Asuna together with two girls, a dark elf and two boys had her surprised the most.
''Nothing better than a hot bath after a long day of work,'' Deadpool stated as he lay the length of his body along the bath, his feet almost at the other end of the bath. Not that he took a bath in his everyday life but those are just minor details. [Payback?] {That was bitchy.}
''You think? I think the water feels kind of weird.'' The black-haired partner replied, not knowing the secrets of a certain setting. I see, I see.
Not needing any guidance on the next part, Deadpool stated confidently, ''That is probably because you don't know the true way of how to enjoy a bath like this.''
Noticing Deadpool was hiding something, both Argo and Kirito's curiosity was piqued, and the rat asked, ''What do you mean, DP?''
Deadpool grinned, feeling the hook already bitten by the prey he wanted to catch as he answered, ''Not going to tell you. If you want something, you got to pay for it. And if you give me three weeks, you get a whole new manual with it as well.''
Argo laid back in her mellow-yellow bathing suit as she replied with, ''Fine. But I want it in three weeks, DP. And you better not hold back on me.''
''Noted,'' Deadpool grinned, the rat suddenly feeling a cold shiver running up her back despite the hot water that was embracing her.
''Well, considering how we have discovered that fallen elf base and have beaten another field boss, I would say we did earn this moment of relaxation,'' Asuna had her eyes closed and therefore had not noticed the shocked expression that had took hold of Kizmel's face.
''Fallen?! Where did you encounter them?!''
And thus began the explanation of the -Shipwright of Yore Part 2- quest as well as the activation of the third part of that quest. After a quick gathering at the top of the castle, in the office of Viscount Yofilis {Shady bastard!} and all gaining a ring to get unlimited and easy entrance into any dark elf facility, the Defense of Yofel Castle quest had started.
With only three days remaining, the players had to prepare themselves for anything the forest elves had to throw at them. What the forest elves or the five other members of Deadpool did not know, was that the Merc in Red had a surprise for the invading forces as well.
With only one day remaining, the players were not only trained and prepared for the battle that was about to happen but were actually keen on finally starting that so long-awaited fight.
Naturally, the darkness of the evening had already fallen over the lands, making sure the five-player party retreated back to Yofel's castle. That, however, did not stop both Kirito and Deadpool as they were currently occupied in the training hall of the dark elves.
The blue sparks of a one-handed sword skill struck a shield before a two-handed battle axe came crashing down, the receiver barely dodging it. Immediately countering it with a Horizontal sword skill, Deadpool had to drop his axe and summon a curved sword just to block it, instantly countering it with an uppercut that was blocked by Kirito's arm. The black-haired swordsman shuffled backward before a big grin grew on his face and jumped straight back in on his partner.
While the countdown for the duel was at half its mark, both players showed the best of their abilities [Well, we are still holding up!] {Only a bit though.} and clashed for a sixth time, iron clashing with iron and flesh clashing with flesh. [That sounds wrong.] {We are talking Martial Arts here, not something else.}
On the side, Asuna, Kizmel, Argo, and Yuna witnessed the duel between the two. ''Do they do this often?'' Yuna asked, finding the easiness of striking the other player's health down quite terrifying, even if it was just a friendly duel.
Argo sighed before she answered, ''They used to do this a lot, but luckily, they toned it down. It is not easy when you are in the middle of the field when someone suddenly askes, 'Kirito, duel me!' ''
Asuna shared that opinion as she added, ''Don't have to tell me twice. Sometimes I just thought they were doing it just to attract more mobs.''
''Which would be an excellent way to strengthen yourself if I say so myself,'' Kizmel said thoughtfully. ''Perhaps they need to require some communication skills first before doing such a thing though.'' She added when she noticed the complicated faces of both Argo and Asuna.
At the same time, a two-handed sword clashed with an Annual Blade +8, before the new sword skill -Horizontal Square- was activated. Knowing the sword skill from the Manual of Dummies and just by his assumed skill, Deadpool countered the four strikes perfectly, before kicking his partner in the balls in the cooldown.
Feeling the uneasiness of that sensation crawling through his body, Kirito lifted his head before asking, ''Was that really necessary?''
''Absolutely!'' Deadpool answered with a grin before coming down with another strike, Kirito dodging it by stepping forward and punching Deadpool back in the nuts with an uppercut, finally ending the battle.
''And that's payback.''
Deadpool was suddenly very happy OP had a say in his options and disabled that certain option he was previously referring to. If not, Deadpool would have been in for a nasty surprise. Pain? [Ooh] {Not the nuts!} Thanks OP. Should not forget to add that in the manual as well.
Leaving the room for a moment to rest, [Or just for other reasons.] Deadpool decided to think out loud. ''Yeah right. You know I am talking to you. I have no idea what you expect me to do tomorrow, so I was hoping you could help me. There is nothing in this book about your plan, so if you got something, now is the time to tell me.''
For a moment, there was no reaction. Then, in the corner of Deadpool's eye, a certain candle on the wall began to respond to the mysterious wind that came from the tunnel. ''Not the wind thing again, OP. Come on man! Speak to me! Besides, I still don't have a clue what you are saying.''
The wind pushed one last time harshly in Deadpool's face before it vanished and another -!- popped up in Deadpool's HUD. When the Merc in Red pressed it, a new window popped up in front of him saying: -New Item received: Tactics of the Three Kingdoms book-
''Three Kingdoms? Where did I hear that before?''
[Wasn't that supposed to be the story from Dynasty Warriors?'']
{You want us to use a tactic from that time? What could possibly work in this scenario?!}
Pressing the dark orange lined OK button, ''Okay I get it. You are irritated. Easy.'' The book landed in Deadpool's hand, immediately followed by a harsh wind blowing it open. ''Okay, I assume you have waited a long time for this idea. Better be spectacular then. What am I looking at?''
In front of him was a certain inspiring battle, one that proved tactics were much more valuable than the number of opponents. Pictures of ships, a burning-red tiger and a magnificent green dragon versus an even more beautiful and threating sight of a blue Phoenix.
''Okay, I am not in the mood of a history lesson. Just tell me what I need to know.''
Feeling the temperature rise in the room by the sudden brightly burning of the candles, {Easy there. We're sorry!} orange lines began to appear on certain parts of the book. Shifting his attention to the book once more, Deadpool started to read it once again.
Battle of…. overpowered by the enemy forces… the use of two elements turned the tide… shattered the enemies' forces into oblivion… ooh… I like it!
[Now the candle and the temperature are suddenly obvious.]
{Mind to dial them down though? You still want a Deadpool if you want this plan to follow through tomorrow.}
While the flames on the candles began to lessen, a soft breeze gently lowered the temperature to how it was previously. {Thank you.}
''However, as much as I like the idea and assuming you handle one of the two aspects, we still need to create the other.''
Another pop-up captured Deadpool's attention and he noticed orange lines [Can you do blue or maybe red? Why orange?] surrounding a certain skill in his skill slots. Then, for the first time using this skill, his body moved with a system-assisted movement as he took something from behind his back and held it in front of his face.
A large grin appeared on Deadpool's face before he stated, ''Perfect. Let's do this. And while we're here anyway, with Jesus-kun probably too busy with the girls, I can tell you my opinion on the reviews. Let's see.''
Noticing he had three reviews, he stated, ''Well better than last time. First is from … [For protective purposes blocked], Yeah we know everything about the guy. And I am planning to abuse it to its fullest potential!'' Deadpool stated grinning.
Noticing the next review he stated, ''Well, fuck you too! Just kidding you bloody legend. Keep staying cool. And the third one? Yeah, Aincrad Geographic is just so amazing. And I heard episode 2 should be around the corner [Which will be another two months if we have to believe OP.] {Or now, depending on when you are reading this.} Now, where is the other guy? Did I scare him when I reacted to his review the last time?''
[You probably did.]
Unfortunately for Deadpool, the time he had left to speak with himself was none because the door behind him opened and all his companions stepped out. Face drooping in exhaustion, Asuna yawned, ''I really could use a bath right now.''
''Not if I am first! And I am going fully naked! Care to join me, Kirito-boy?'' Deadpool shouted as he ran past them, grabbing the confused boy by the arm and dragging him with him.
''Oh, hell no!'' Kirito cried as he tried to get loose of the hold on his arm.
''I am going in first!'' Asuna shouted as she tried to catch up to the Merc in Red, leaving the other three girls behind.
Silence hung a moment before Kizmel suddenly pondered, ''Maybe I should join them. I wonder what Sir Deadpool looks like under that mask.''
''And go in completely naked?'' Yuna asked as her face became completely red.
Argo grinned before stating jokingly, ''What are you worrying about, Yu-chan? Don't tell me you are that prudish.''
''I am not! But it feels just a bit strange to do this when I have only known you guys for a week…''
''Yet, you trust them with your life. Strange.'' Kizmel stated as she headed in the same direction of the other three players.
The remaining part of that evening bath was filled with an almost completely naked laughing and likeable Deadpool, [Except for the mask of course!] a more naked embarrassed Kirito, a naked comfortable Kizmel, a beet-red naked Asuna, a laughing and grinning Argo the Rat, another rat that had no idea where the cheese was, {How did he get in the castle?} and another embarrassed naked Yuna. Yeah, things had escalated quickly. [Nailed it!]
''So, what is the plan?'' Kirito asked his companions, all except Argo sitting in the Tilnel at the quay of the dark elf castle. She had to inform the other groups about the plan of Kirito and the others, to make sure none of them did anything reckless. Not that they were planning it, for their own battle in the elf campaign would start two days later.
''How about we attack from the side? If we use the rocks on the side as cover, we can surprise the invasion and cut them short.'' Deadpool suggested, Asuna not in the mood to argue over such a thing while Yuna was too embarrassed to say anything at all.
Only Kizmel was in the mood to smile as she answered confidently, ''Sounds like a well thought out tactic. Let us proceed to the stone walls of this lake.''
''You heard the lady. Put some muscle in those lovely arms of yours, partner.'' The Merc in Red shot a cheeky smile, Asuna and Yuna once again becoming red-heads when flashes of Kirito's arms got mixed with flashes of his naked body the evening before.
Despite having trained well in the couple of days prior to this one, the harsh wind of the day made the rowing a bit more difficult for Kirito than he was expecting. Finally arriving at the side, the group waited while Yuna started to play her flute again to calm down. Asuna composed herself thanks to the sound and prepared herself internally for a battle that could become just as heavy as a boss fight.
Kizmel enjoyed the soft sound of the little instrument as she added a bit of humming to the already delightful music. And Deadpool just mimicked a drum as he made a little rhythm with the sound of his hands clapping on his legs. That display of teamwork did not last long, stopping when the alarms of the castle echoed through the air.
''Here they come,'' Kirito stated, readying himself. The first line of the forest elf invasion consisted of three boats, followed by four boats, followed by another five boats, followed by boats, followed by… {We get it! A lot!}
Kirito wanted to intercept the fourth line, bringing the battle around the castle when Deadpool stood up and shouted, ''Time for some music!''
Under the guidance of the song Burn it to the Ground by Nickelback, Deadpool used his mimic skill to mimic the motion from the day before, grabbing a lit-up torch from behind his back.
''DP? What are you doing?''
''A change of tactics, pal! Let's burn them up!'' He shouted enthusiastically. Before anyone could stop him, he teleported away, only to be found on the first ship of the invasion.
Before one of the forest elves NPCs could even comprehend there was an enemy in front of them, Deadpool threw the torch to the middle of the boat, giving the steering wheel from the ship a complete twist. He ended his act with another summoning of a sword, just to jam it into the wheel to keep it positioned.
While the first ship was catching fire and turned straight against the one next to it, Deadpool had already teleported to another ship and repeated the process. Thus, when the Merc was done and both the fire and the harsh wind had done their thing, only two ships had made it out of the chaos scatheless.
On the side, Kizmel smiled, staring at the sea of fire as she approved, ''What an original tactic. It would have been wise to inform us of it first, but it is a pleasant surprise nevertheless.''
''I wouldn't be so sure,'' Asuna added as she pointed to the instant fog and noticed extra ships as reinforcement coming. Kirito whistled once and waved at Deadpool, who instantly used his teleportation to come back to the Tilnel.
''What's the matter, partner? Not happy with my tactic?''
''No, it is not that. The problem is you are not done yet.'' Kirito answered as he pointed to the ships.
Deadpool shrugged, ''Just a minor detail. Give me a second.''
The problem was, it wasn't so minor. Cardinal, the main system of the world of Aincrad, was programmed to have certain situations in the campaign quests. And when these situations were placed, the system wasn't that flexible that it could change it on the spot. For that reason, one ship after another came as long as the conditions were not met, something the players figured out when the 49th wave of forest elves came and Deadpool was out of teleportation.
''Strange how the forest elves have so many troops. Even if they win this fight, they have already lost too much in this single battle.'' Kizmel noted. ''Is the fall of Yofel castle truly worth that many lives?''
''Well, if they are defeated, everything is good, right? With a 'battle' like this, we can assume we will no longer have any problems with them.'' Yuna answered, the nervousness from the beginning of the battle completely faded away in those two hours of watching burning ships.
''That is true. Anyway, let's focus on the enemy before us.''
''Right!'' Three voices answered confidently.
Naturally, things had to go bad eventually and that moment came when the 65th wave finally broke through the dark elf barricade and had made it onto the docks. Yuna, Kizmel, Kirito, and Asuna were protecting the gate with a few dark elves from their invaders when DP had an idea.
''AAAH!'' A forest elf screamed in pain, running to the water before shattering into oblivion, the three swords that were up his butt falling on the ground.
''You gave me the idea. I like that Darius guy in your other story.'' Deadpool explained to himself. A harsh wind blew away another attacker that was by his side, saving him just in time.
''So compliments are the way to go with you. That is noted!'' Deadpool declared loudly before stabbing a forest elf in the chest with one sword, stabbing another sword in the side of his neck and following it up by jamming the first sword deeper before jumping backward and summoning a giant two-handed sword.
''Time to go Berserk,'' Deadpool grinned, before smashing that heavy sword onto a forest elf spearman. Copying the movements of the first and original 'Black Swordsman', Deadpool's mimic style kicked in and he used the sword with only one hand.
''This is more like it!''
''Deadpool-san, watch out!'' Yuna shouted. And before Deadpool noticed what had happened, the forest elf warrior that was about to strike him was launched back by an Oblique from the fencer.
''Well thanks.''
''No problem. Don't do anything reckless.''
''Don't ask too much,'' Deadpool shot back, grinning, Asuna sighed before shifting her attention back to a new enemy. Not much later, the voice of a dark elf could be heard, calling above all else. ''Warriors of Lyusula! I apologize for my long absence and I beg for your strength! The future of Lyusula rests on this battle! For the sake of the queen, friends and family, stand strong and fight with me!''
[I missed you copying.]
{Glad you are still the same.}
Under the guidance of the four buffs of Viscount Yofilis and the return of their black-haired companion, the five party members charged forward without a second to waste. Stabbing elves in the chest, neck or butt; Deadpool didn't stop.
By the time all the forest elves had retreated or been destroyed, five hours had passed. It was for that reason all five players fell on their knees or their backs when the quest log appeared, only to shock back awake.
Before the quest had started, Deadpool was level 18, as well as Kirito and Kizmel. Asuna was level 17, and Yuna was level 12. When that reward window appeared, at least one player wondered if the game had made another mistake, apart from letting Kizmel live. The current levels for the players [and NPC dark elf] present were as followed:
- Kirito, level 24.
- Asuna, level 23.
- Kizmel, level 24.
- Deadpool, level 24.
- Yuna, level 20.
''What just happened?'' The now level 20 dagger user was bewildered, now strong enough to get her fifth skill. ''How did we get so much experience all of a sudden?''
Kirito answered, as he tried to get back up on his feet, ''I am not certain but I think it has to do with the extra waves the game added just to bring us to this point. It is not that hard to figure out when you consider how many forest elves we have beaten over the course of this afternoon.''
''Roughly 10,000 forest elves.'' Asuna added, Kirito's shocked expression making the situation almost funny. Or just funny in Deadpool's eyes. {You've got to admit it is.} [On another note, I can see why you were so keen on writing this part.]
Before he could repeat that huge number of opponents, the players noticed someone floating over the water using water shoes that were available in Rovia. Together with her tremendous agility, it had learned itself the trick to skate over water.
''Argo?!'' Kirito was shocked, not expecting that from his beta friend.
''Took you guys long enough. What have you been doing for those five hours?'' the rat asked grinning.
''Burning down 65 waves of forest elf ships and defeating around 10,000 forest elves. Anything I didn't add?'' Deadpool asked his companions.
''No, that seems about accurate enough.'' Asuna answered, aware of the bewildered look Argo gave her. Yet, she was expecting a more flabbergasted expression from the rat.
The reason Argo wasn't that shocked about the statement was the following. ''That explains the six levels that I gained just now. Anyone got something more to share?''
''I got a new skill.'' Deadpool smirked, followed by an ''Oh, shit…'' from his black-haired companion.
Two days later, the raiding group stood in front of the black doors of the 4th-floor dungeon. Normally, Diavel would be giving a speech, Deadpool not listening, Jesus-kun focusing on the fight that was about to come and more of that useless crap. Deadpool, get off my keyboard!
Fine, fine. This is just the end of the chapter so you have to make it spectacular. Today, however, things were not the same. No kidding. Are you going to tell why yet? Fuck off, I am still talking.
The only guild on the front line had tried to do the same tactic as the other group in the campaign, yet without any additional reward. And thus, the difference in strength was well known by the players. Diavel, the strongest of the guild was level 18 while Kirito was still level 24.
Now, that was not the strangest part. The strangest part was the assistance of both Kizmel and Viscount Yofilis in the battle. And judging from the ADA faces who had chosen the forest elf side of the campaign, the Mahogany cursor from Kizmel and the black cursor of Yofilis were a clear indication they were not to be trifled with. [A bit going with progressive, but not that troublesome.]
Before one could ask if it was a good idea to have the dark elves help them in this battle, Viscount Yofilis stepped forward and said, ''Warriors of mankind! If you intend to fight, then stand ready at once! If not, be quiet! In either case, through my pact with these humans, I will dispatch this guardian. In my name, Yofilis, knight of Lyusula, I command all who can stand to follow my lead!''
With the four additional buffs proved by the speech, the seventh large raiding group charged into the chamber, Deadpool the first of many that unleashed its fury on Wythege the Hippocampus.
And despite its special ability to close the door and overflow the entire chamber with water, the beast had no chance against the combined assault of the players present. It naturally helped that Argo was pushing the doors open from the outside the moment water poured out of it. It also helped that Deadpool tried to ride the beast as a normal horse, making it smash into every wall that it possibly could. [No meme.] {But it is something!}
Saying their goodbyes to Kizmel on the fourth floor, the party of five moved forward, up the stairs towards the next adventure that was waiting for them.
Author's note:
So that was it for chapter 6. Finally finished the fourth floor. Things have been hectic.
''Agreed. Pho, your life is a mess man. Get your act together.''
[Agreed. But glad you paid some attention to this masterpiece.]
{Now, focus on that shit of yours again!}
Thank you, Fate-of-Wishes, for beta-reading this chapter. Solid job as usual.
Hope you guys enjoyed this double-sized chapter and hope to see all you legends in the next one. Beyor out!-