Hi guys, I'm sorry about the lack of updates recently. School has been a pain and I've had to travel a lot for my recent ward rotations. Here is a new chapter at last, a short one. Hope you enjoy!
Beck's POV:
After dropping Jade off, safely around the corner from her house, I took my time driving home, opting for the scenic route rather than the quick one. My head was spinning with thoughts and concerns for my dark-haired friend and in my absentmindedness I almost missed the last turn. A red SUV honked angrily behind me as I made a jerky turn last minute without signaling.
After our little trip on New Years things had gone back to normal, or as normal as things ever were when Jade was involved. We'd been even closer than before, our talk seemingly breaking down some of those barriers formerly in place. Jade had been more open, even going as far as telling me about how her family had been through a big loss and that it was taking its toll on them. She wouldn't tell me what loss but I had my suspicions.
And then something switched again. And Jade, well she shut down. I'd seen all her different moods before, always seemingly triggered by events occurring at home, all of which she refused to talk about. I'd seen the fiery anger, the viciousness and the outbursts. I'd seen her sad, cold, stoic. But this, this was something new. This was Jade completely shutting down, her behavior turning into that of a hunted animal. She was scared.
I tried getting her to talk about it, I really did, but it was all in vain. She did want to tell me, I could feel it, but something stopped her and the more I pushed the worse she got, the guilt seemingly eating at her. I didn't know what to do, felt helpless. Forced to just stand back and watch my friend slip deeper and deeper into herself. It wasn't fair.
I could tell Cat was getting worried too and we took turns caring for Jade at school. Bringing her coffee, taking her to lunch, shielding her from the gossiping masses of people at school. It wasn't enough, I knew that, but at least it was something. I threw myself into the role of her bodyguard, companion, safekeeper. Played it like I'd never played a part before in my life. And if sometimes I allowed myself to squeeze her shoulders for a tad bit too long or press a chaste kiss against her hair as I hugged her goodbye then that was all about playing the part.
I spent the rest of the night in my RV, trying to finish up some homework for the day after but my mind kept running in circles and I had a hard time focusing on the differential equations in front of me, instead ending up doodling absentmindedly in the margin. After struggling for a while I finally gave up and tossed the book away, instead putting on some music and scrolling through the Slap.
It was just after 11 pm and I was starting to get ready for bed when there was a timid knock on the door. Assuming that it was one of my parents coming to say goodnight I just called out "It's open!" and kept on brushing my hair. No one entered though and instead there was another faint knock on the door.
With a sigh I made my way to the door, about to tell mom that she should probably have her ears checked, but when the door swung open it revealed none other than Jade. Hair ruffled by the wind, mascara streaks down her cheeks but with a steely look in her eyes.
"Jade? What are you doing here?" I asked carefully, my eyes wide with surprise.
She didn't reply, instead just making her way past me into the RV and plopping down on the bed.
"Um... hi? Are you okay?" I carefully sat down next to her, slinging an arm over her shoulders. At first she tensed up at the touch, but then eased into it, curling into my side. Still not saying anything.
"Shouldn't you be home in bed?" I gently rubbed her shoulder with my hand, feeling her stiff posture gradually relax.
She turned her head towards me, eyes wary. "So you don't want me here?" I could hear the challenge in her voice, daring me to keep up with the questions. "Fine. I guess I'll go sleep on a bench in the park then" She started trying to get loose from the embrace, presumably to get up and storm out.
"No, of course not" I said softly, putting my other arm around her as well, gently tugging her into the embrace until she was leaning towards my chest. I'll admit, I was confused at first, still was, but if something happened that was bad enough to drive her out the house, of course I would offer her shelter. No questions asked. Or, no more questions at least.
"Can I sleep here?" She asked, voice small.
"Of course" I squeezed her tighter, resting my chin on top of her head. "Anytime."
I could tell she wasn't in the mood to talk more, seemingly too distressed and scared. Instead I simply showed her the bathroom and offered up a spare toothbrush before leaving her to sleep in my bed. She just looked at me with an expression of pure gratefulness, something that said more than a thousand words, before crawling underneath the covers. I could feel something squirming inside me, a tingling sensation on my skin but promptly brushed it off and grabbed a blanket as I went to lie down on the sofa.
"Goodnight Jade" I whispered into the darkness of the RV before closing my eyes and attempting to go to sleep. I was met with silence.
I was awoken by the sound of screaming.
"No, please stop! Don't do it, please. Oh god, Beck, no!"
Jade was tossing and turning in her sleep, a thin layer of sweat covering her forehead, tears streaming down her pale cheeks. And she was screaming my name. What even?
In a second I was on my feet, approaching the bed, unsure of how to handle the situation, just feeling the primal instinct to protect, protect this beautiful girl with everything I had. I knelt down beside the bed, gently stroking her arm.
"Shh Jade, it's okay. You're okay. It's just a dream"
She calmed a little, but didn't wake up and kept up the frantic tossing. I tried again, soothingly stroking her arm and whispering how she was okay, how she was safe over and over again until her breathing evened out and her eyes fluttered open.
"Beck?" Her eyes looked confused, scared even.
"Shh you're okay. It was just a nightmare. You're okay." Her gaze softened at my words and she surged forwards enveloping me in a tight hug, sobs still shaking through her thin body.
"I thought you were dead." She whispered into my neck. "Oh god, I thought you were dead."
Gently stroking her hair I wrapped her in my arms. "I'm okay, I promise. I'm okay". This seemed to relax her and she buried her face into my neck. I could feel the wetness of her tears on my skin and it only made me hold on to her even tighter.
"Beck?" She mumbled, sound getting muffled in my t-shirt.
"Yes?"
"Will you stay? In case I get the nightmare again?" Small voice, seemingly embarassed with the request. Oh if only the people at school talking about the ice queen with no feelings could see her now. She was probably the most human person I'd ever met, full of raw feelings and insecurities all carefully tucked away behind those steel walls she put up. And I'd gotten to glimpse behind them, to see the real Jade. The thought made me feel warm on the inside. I'd gotten to see the real her and she was beautiful.
"Of course"
Without breaking the embrace she shifted back on the bed, making room for me to lie down beside her. Limbs still entangled, my nose buried in her hair and her face in my neck we fell asleep together. I'd never slept better.
I woke up to the shrill sound of my alarm clock followed by a loud crash. My arms were filled with the warm, soft curves of Jade and I could feel the memories from last night coming back to me. The surprise visit, the nightmare, the sleeping together. Strangely it didn't feel very strange, even with the early sun rays streaming into the windows of the RV. I sighed contently, contemplating whether it would be okay to drift back to sleep for just a few minutes or if that would make me late for school. Make us late for school.
"Hey what time is it?" My voice was a bit raspy, throat dry.
"No idea"
I looked around for my alarm clock, trying to catch a glimpse of the time, but it was nowhere to be found.
"Hey, where's my clock?" I could feel Jade stiffen in my arms.
"Um... It's like on the floor somewhere over there?" She loosened her arm around me to point in the general direction of the kitchen.
I sighed. Of course it was. "Please tell me you didn't break it?"
"Can't promise anything." She lifted her eyes from my chest to look at me, blue eyes sparkling with mischief. I shot her a pointed glare.
"What? I had to! It was annoying!"
I smiled at her, not really upset about the clock, simply basking in the relative normalness of her behavior. Clock breaking and all.
"You feeling better?" I asked carefully, only now remembering exactly how upset she'd been last night, tear-streaked cheeks and running away from home.
She averted my gaze but shrugged. "I guess. Now make me some coffee"
I knew this was as much as I was gonna get for now so I dropped the subject and disentagled my arms from around her to get out of bed.
"As you wish madam"