16. #Cat'sBigMoment

"Miss Valentine, you're next."

The intern, Miranda, hurried in and adjusted the small lapel mic on Cat's dress. She gave her a silent thumbs' up and hurried off.

Cat drew in a deep breath. She was focused (as much as she could be) and she was definitely ready for this audition (as much as she could be). She'd done a great job of putting Sam and Carly out of her mind all day. She simply pretended that it wasn't happening. That she didn't have her heart ripped out and stomped on. She was, in her own mind, in a play. Playing the part of a young girl who didn't have a girlfriend that broke her heart.

So far, the ruse had worked spectacularly. Cat really was a good actress, no matter what anyone else might have thought of her. When she found a method that worked for her, it really worked. And of course there was no question about her singing ability. So she had a reasonable amount of confidence that this audition was going to go well. She just hoped she was better than the other girls, because she knew there would be serious talent here. Mercifully, she didn't have to sit and watch it all, so she had no idea what she was really up against. She just wanted to go out and do her best.

Jade joined her, a gorgeous acoustic guitar strapped to her back.

"You ready?"

Cat nodded. "Thanks again for coming with me."

"Sure."

Jade looked beyond Cat for a moment. A smile crossed her lips, fleeting though it was. "Looks like I'm not the only one."

Cat followed Jade's gaze.

Sam stood there, a hesitant smile on her face.

Cat's head snapped to Jade. Her eyes were wide. She felt like she couldn't breathe again.

"Relax. I asked her to join us. You've got a minute. Maybe say hello."

Sam had already closed the distance between them by the time Cat turned back around.

"Hey, kid. You look amazing."

Cat felt lightheaded. She drank in the sight of the beautiful blonde before her. She wore her snug jean shorts with the black pantyhose that drove Cat into an absolute frenzy, and a snug blue and gray t-shirt with the low-cut collar. Cat's insides were on fire. She swallowed hard.

"Cat, I know you overheard that phone call. I'm so sorry. I know I probably said some things you didn't want to hear. I didn't want to hurt you with any of it. The fact is, I did love Carly, for a long time. And I still do, but just as my friend and my sister. She wasn't trying to steal me away like that." Sam took a breath. Was she nervous? Cat couldn't remember a single time she had ever seemed so nervous. "She did ask me if I wanted to do iCarly again, though. To come to Italy with her and start things back up." Cat's brow furrowed. Her breathing came in quick gasps. Before she could say anything, Sam reached out and touched her arm. "I told her no. I told her I wanted to be with you."

Cat was trembling. "Sam, I—"

"Cat, I love you so damn much, it scares me. It scares me because I've lived in the dark my entire life, and your light shines so brightly, it's overwhelming. It's chased a lot of that darkness away. But that's a big change, and it's kind of scary."

Cat felt warm all over. Her thoughts bled together. "You're not scared of anything."

"Yes, I am. I'm scared of losing you. Of losing that light."

Cat blinked, and the tears that had been building started to fall. "Really? Little old me scares Samantha Puckell?"

"Yeah. I don't want to live without you anymore. You make me so much better."

"You make me better, too."

Sam took Cat's hand in her own. The touch fanned the flames in Cat's belly. "I don't want to run anymore. I don't want to hide from us. If that means coming to New York or wherever then I'm there. I'm in it with you."

"You'd leave home for me?"

"I'm more at home with you than anywhere I've ever been."

"Just shut up, Puckell. You had me at, 'hey kid, you look amazing.'"

Cat pulled Sam into a tight embrace. When the kiss came, the fire threatened to overwhelm Cat. It spread to the tip of her toes and the top of her head. She wanted to abandon everything, to get away and just be with Sam.

"What the hell is going on here?"

Cat and Sam reluctantly ended their embrace. To Cat's left, she found the curtain had opened. She and Sam were making out on stage, in front of Carl Crane.

Sam looked at Cat sheepishly. "Your mic was on wasn't it?"

"You distracted me."

"I've seriously got to stop the romantic speeches in backstage areas."

"But you're so good at them."

In the front, Carl Crane stood with his arms folded over his chest. He glared at the pair from underneath a very firm, angry-looking brow. On either side, his assistants glanced nervously at each other, going through their paperwork as if there were an answer in there somewhere.

Sam looked to Cat with wide eyes. "I'm sorry. I hope I didn't screw this up."

Jade appeared out of nowhere, her guitar in-hand. She smirked at them both. "Don't worry, kids. I'll clean this up."

She strode out onto the stage with purpose. She commanded the attention of everyone in the auditorium as she approached the front of the stage. "That was Cat Valentine's dramatic audition, from an original screenplay called 'Oh god, I Want to Vomit.' Thanks to Samantha Puckett for performing with her."

Cat watched, wide-eyed, as Carl Crane considered this. "That's not normally how we do things here," he said, a hint of irritation in his voice. "But it was very bold and well-done. Thank you, Miss Valentine. Miss Puckett." He did a double-take at Sam as she and Cat hurried to Jade's side. "Wait. Samantha. Weren't you on a web show years ago? iCarly?"

Sam sighed. "That's right. In fact, Carly herself is right back there."

Carl turned around, and Cat followed his gaze. In the back of the sprawling auditorium, she could barely make out Carly Shay waving to the director. And…was that Tori next to her!?

"Sam, did you bring everyone?" Cat whispered.

"Jade brought Tori and me out. Carly wanted to come, too. She wanted to apologize for making you worry."

"My daughter and I used to watch your show all the time," Carl said. "We're fans. Please stick around after the audition, I'd love to get both of your autographs for her. She's in college now. Has her own YouTube channel. She does unboxing videos."

"Very cool," Sam said, but Cat was sure she was just being polite. She'd seen Sam's reaction to unboxing videos. "Sure, we'll stay after."

"Wonderful. Now, please get off the stage so Miss Valentine can perform her song."

Sam squeezed Cat's hand and kissed her cheek. "You've got this, kid. I know you do."

Cat swelled with confidence as Sam climbed down off the stage. She sat a few seats down from Carl. Cat turned to Jade and nodded. Jade began plucking the opening notes on the guitar.

Cat turned back to Carl and his aides. This was her moment. After years of training and singing all over LA, this was the moment Cat had been waiting for. She put forth her best smile, made easier because she was looking at Sam, and drew a deep breath. "My name is Caterina Valentine, and I'm singing Landslide, by Stevie Nicks."

I took my love, and I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Till the landslide brought me down

The world disappeared as Cat sang her heart. She thought back upon her days at Hollywood Arts High School. She sang of meeting Jade and Tori for the first time. Of her confusing relationship with Robbie. All the wonderful things she learned from Sikowitz. Of Jade and Beck's break-up and reunion. Of starring in Beck's movies.

Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?

In her heart, Cat sang about meeting Mona Patterson and about the weird Saturday detention she and her friends endured that was oddly similar to The Breakfast Club. She sang of Tori getting stuck in zombie makeup, of Robbie and his weird talent for hamboning. Of being on Brain Squeezers and of the first time she met the iCarly gang.

Well, I've been afraid of changing
'Cause I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder, children get older
I'm getting older too

Cat sang of the day she got trapped in a garbage truck, and the amazing blonde girl who came to her rescue. She sang of a babysitting business, of crazy little British girls and an obnoxious little girl who refused to give up her stuffed poober. She sang of getting stuck in a room behind a wall with her best friend who was so much more than that now, and of the time she was willing to risk serious injury to protect her love from killer tuna. She sang of spending hundreds of dollars on a doll and her fake injuries, and of watching the throbbing moon and obsessing over perfect shoes.

So take my love, take it down
Oh, if you climb a mountain and you turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well, the landslide will bring you down…

Cat sang her heart and soul into the simple words of that simple song, and only when the final notes were just a memory in that auditorium did she come back to the present moment, where everyone else. She wiped her eyes and wondered at what point she had started crying.

Carl Crane stared blankly at Cat. He reached into his pocket, pulled out a handkerchief, and dabbed his eyes. I made him cry? Ohmygosh!

The room filled with the sound of clapping. Sam was on her feet cheering, her eyes damp and red. Tears streaked down her cheeks and she made no attempt to hide them. Ohmygosh. I made Sam cry.

Carly and Tori joined Sam, clapping from their seats in the back. Another set of hands joined in as Jade stepped forward.

"Very well done, Miss Valentine," Carl Crane said. "Very, very well done. That's not usually a piece we hear for a musical audition. But this entire experience has been full of unique and, I daresay, bold decisions. I very much appreciate you coming out. We'll let you know as soon as we decide."

Cat felt her cheeks glowing. She curtseyed slightly toward Carl Crane, then left the stage and made her way over to Sam. Sam stood there for a moment as if she wanted to say something. Her eyes bore into Cat's and found some unspoken connection there, and Cat knew what was in her heart. She felt gratitude, she felt relief, she felt overwhelming love. Sam seemed to realize that Cat understood. She smiled threw her arms around Cat, pulling her into a warm, crushing, safe embrace.

"I'm proud of you," she whispered.

"I know. Your heart just told mine."

Moments later, Tori and Jade joined them. Cat slipped out of Sam's embrace and hugged Tori. "Thank you so much for coming," she said.

Tori returned the embrace warmly. "Are you kidding me? I wouldn't have missed this for anything. You really made it shine."

Cat turned to Jade next. "I know you brought everyone out here," she said. "Thank you." Before Jade could object, Cat's arms were around her.

"Okay, all right. Long enough." Cat released her friend. "You're welcome. You crushed it."

"Tori, wasn't it really sweet of Jade to buy you guys tickets to come see me?" Cat asked.

"Um, yeah," Tori said, confused. "Very surprising. Almost out of character."

Jade glared hard at Cat for a moment. "I thought we were clear," she said.

"As crystal," Cat said. "Even if you can't see it."

Jade's eyes narrowed. But for just a moment, when she thought Cat wasn't looking, Jade did smile at Tori. Tori returned the smile, a look of utter confusion on her face.

Outside the auditorium, Carly stood alone. Cat stopped short when she saw her. Her hands started to sweat, and her throat felt like it was closing in. Sam gently squeezed her hand.

"It's all right," she said softly. "You don't have to talk to her if you don't want. She gets it."

Cat looked into Sam's eyes and drew strength from her assured gaze. She let go of the blonde's hand and walked over to Carly.

"Hi," she said.

"Hi."

The awkwardness was intense. Carly avoided eye contact, and Cat could tell she was really uncomfortable. So she did the only thing she could think of to break the awkwardness.

She hugged Carly. Pulled her into a warm embrace, as if she'd known the girl forever. After a moment, Cat felt Carly's arms around her as well.

"Thank you for keeping her safe all those years," Cat whispered. "She's the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Carly pulled out of the embrace just enough to look Cat in the eye. "To both of us," she said. "And I think you're the best thing that's ever happened to her, too."

"I'd really love to be friends with you," Cat said, and she sincerely meant it. "Between the show and knowing Sam, I feel like I know you already. But not really you, just the version of you Sam talks about. Which is great and all, but I'd like to know the you that you are, too."

Carly smiled, and Cat's heart stuttered. There was something about how effortless and charming it was. Cat started to understand, just a little, why Sam was so enamored with her.

"I'd love that," Carly said.

The door to the auditorium opened, and one of Crane's aides stepped out. "Excuse me, Carly? Sam? Mister Crane would love to get those autographs now."

Cat released Carly and stood aside. She watched as Carly and Sam stepped into the auditorium together. Jade and Tori joined Cat, watching the two disappear into the darkened room.

"Kind of cool seeing them together again," Jade said.

"I agree."

"So it's all good now?"

"It's better than good."

Tori glanced awkwardly at Jade. "You'll never hear me say it publicly, but…I was really wrong about you. I mean I've tried to be nice and be your friend and stuff, but I always thought you were mostly just frigid and heartless."

"Good," Jade said flatly. "My plan worked."

Tori smiled. "You almost had me convinced. But what you've done here is pretty amazing. I'll only say it this once. I'm proud of you. And I think you're a good person under all that rage and anger. So…nice job."

Tori turned to leave.

"Hey, Vega." Tori turned back to Jade, a hopeful look on her face. "Those shoes are really not you."

Tori scowled for a moment, but it faded into a laugh as she walked back toward the lobby. Cat's eyes were on Jade as she watched Tori depart. The slightest hint of a smile crossed Jade's lips. She must have felt Cat's eyes on her, because she quickly buried it, giving Cat a stern, disapproving look before walking off after Tori.

She totally likes her, Cat thought as she caught up to her friends. Maybe someday she'll admit it."