21. I hate myself

25 November 1992

the shack, New York City outskirts, USA

When I opened my eyes, everything was blurry and dark, I was not quite able to focus, my breaths were high, my mouth was dried, I was feeling like vomiting but there was nothing in my stomach to vomit. I realised I was sitting in a chair in total darkness, I wasn't able to see anything it was totally dark, when I tried to move out of chair, I was not able to, my hands were moving but I was not able to get myself out of the chair or move my legs, I realised it was magic and I was being stupid to try to get something done. I closed my eyes and tried to remember how I ended up here.

"hey, Joe" I shouted as my uncle came in my room without knocking, I was changing my boxers.

"Sorry, 'bout that pal" he said, He moved forward and sat on my bed.

"what's up?" I asked him curiously, he never in night visits me, at least since I turned sixteen.

"Just wanted to tell you something" he started a bit seriously,

"what?" I asked, knowing my uncle, he was just faking the seriousness

"I'M GOING TO PARIS THIS WEEKEND" he exclaimed happily

"that's great" I replied smiling at my uncle's enthusiasm

"hey, kiddo I wanted to take you wit me but" my uncle said "all the old men like me are going so you won't enjoy"

"I'm happy you are not dragging me once in my life to your old-buddies vacation" I said, I still remember every time my uncle went anywhere, I had to tag along, he never left me on my own."Yeah, I know I just think, you are old enough to take care of yourself now" he said proudly while ruffling my hair

"on that note, I was thinking I can maybe rent my own place, find a job" I said, I knew the answer he was just going to deny me

"you can but before that finish your college" He replied,

"Who are you and what did you do to my uncle" I asked, Joe has never before even considered it, he always told me I don't have to as I already have a place, what good is paying rent when you have your own home.

"I'm still me" Uncle Joe Laughed "it is just now you are not a kid"

"Thanks, for finally accepting I'm an adult" I thanked my uncle, while half hugging him

"Then it's a good night," My uncle said, while standing up.

"Nighty night Joe" I shouted as he opened the gate and left with a chuckle.

I went to the bed planning on what to do with my life as Joe has agreed on, me renting a place, that's going to be great. As he will be in Paris for some days now, he won't be in direct threat from those stupid gits, he will be safe, I wasn't able to tell him about that , now I won't have to. In a long time I was going to have a good sleep. Suddenly, I felt something pulling on my naval, I was suffocating, my breaths were faster,. I felt like something was stretching me inside out, when this feeling stopped I landed on a wooden floor, next moment I knew I was vomiting on the floor, I felt nauseated, when I tried to focus on my surrounding I felt something hit on my head…

I opened my eyes, I remembered bits of how I ended up here all were leading to only one conclusion, those bloody brothers somehow abducted me, for how many days, for how long I didn't know after sitting here for next few minutes or hours, I don't know as every second was tough, it felt like ages, in the darkness. I heard a cackling laugh coming out of outside, My mind was not able to process anything quite clearly, I was just sitting here on a chair, I didn't know how to get out of here, as the laugh was coming closer, I was panicking. Suddenly, a door burst open, in darkness I didn't knew there was a door but with the sound and the way some rays of daylight flickered in the place, I was able to see it, it was like any old cottage or shack, because of the some daylight I was able to make out the two faces coming close to me, one with a patch on his right eye, long black hair, looking at me with contempt with the remaining eye, other a round face, bulging big eyes, looking sinisterly at me.

"our guest is awake" Robert Metal chuckled maliciously, the one with the round face.

"another guest on her way" Graham Metal replied to his brother with a laugh, one with a patch on his eye.

"What do you mean?" I tried to shout but my voice came out like a squeal, both of them laughed

"the girl, who thinks she can save you?" Robert quipped

"but she will die with you" Graham said happily

At the mention of Gwen I remembered something, I was stupid, fucking stupid how can I forget something like this, I sat there as both of them were staring at me intently, if I checked it right now in front of them, they will know and she is on her way I've to think something quickly.

15 November 1992

"Hi" I heard the familiar voice of the magical girl, I was on my way to Steven's home he is my only friend in college, he doesn't like history as much as I like so he begged me to help him.

"I don't like your style" I said, she was walking beside me "you out of nowhere appearing and vanishing"

"sorry for my style" she apologised "but, I needed you to have something" I stopped, so did she.

"what?" I asked curiously, looking in her bright blue eyes,

"First, take this and reapeat it, say it aloud?" she told me while holding a piece of yellow paper in her hand, I took it from her.

"stonewell" I read it out loud,

"Remember it, never forget it" she said while taking out a chain, it has a ring in it.

"are you proposing me in this weird kind of way" I asked her, she blushed a bit, before Today I was not even able to ask a girl's name, now I'm making jokes in front of them, kissing them. Oh! God what's happening to me.

"No, see this locket will transport you to safety, the moment you say that word while holding it" she explained,

"Okay, so you mean those two stupid git ever comes in front of me, I just say this word while holding this ring, I'm gone just like you, with a pop" I half speculated half asked.

"Totally, as it is in chain you just have to wear it always, never take it off until we are sure, you are out of truble," she replied more like ordered me, "one more thing never say that word just remember it, when you are in trouble only then say it" she added.

I took it from her, put it on my neck hid the ring under my tee-shirt . She smiled as I did it, then with a wink disappeared with a faint pop.

"next time, I'll have to tell her just don't disappear" I told myself.

I heard a faint pop sound coming from outside, both of them with a smug look went out, , I quickly tried to trace the finger on my chest with fingertip, I felt the round shape, but now I just can't say and get out of here, If it was Gwen.

Suddenly, Gwen came in with her hands in the air, both of the men were cackling.

"are you fine" she asked me from threshold, I just nodded.

"Time to give, Map" ordered Graham metal "satisfied his alive?"

"I will give it but first let him go" Gwen replied defiantly

"first give us the map, then you can have your filth" Graham barked

"Okay, here it is" she replied with giving him a scroll, suddenly both the brothers face lighted up with excitement as they both unrolled the scroll and started reading, it was a paper some old orange paper, but I got my chance as Gwen looked at me, I gestured her with my ring finger. She knew in instant I've the ring. She instantly retrieved a wand from her left hand sleeve, both of the men ooked at her and started laughing,

"Good, good it was not there when we checked" Robert babbled " you used a good spell , but only my brother and I can use magic here" he added smugly

"that I know" she shouted as she strode towards me, the moment she touched my hand I shouted, "STONEWELL", last thing I saw was utterly surprised look on both brother's face.

I felt like same like last time, something pulling and stretching me from my naval, it was suffocating but the moment I landed I felt like vomiting, I tried to but nothing came out except dry saliva.

"Are you fine?" Gwen asked as she kneelt beside me, for rubbing my back, I looked around me for checking where I was it was the same library where, I first time met her, but before I can say or think anything I collapsed, that was the last thing I remembered.

When my eyes opened again, I was staring at white ceiling, I heard some beep and sounds coming from around me, I looked around me there were some machines and I was on a bed, Definitely I was in a hospital. I stayed that way, one of the doctors came, he asked me how was I feeling, I told him good.

"for how long, I am here" I asked the Doctor as he was scribbling something on a notepad

"tweleve hours, you were admitted today morning, by a girl named Gwen Stonewell, you were unconscious and your body was severely dehydrated," he replied to me while checking my blood pressure.

"Thanks" I thanked him

"It's our job" he replied after telling me that I'm alright, next morning I can leave. Almost after Doctor was gone Gwen came in. She looked relieved.

"I'm sorry about all of this" she apologised like it was her fault

"None of this was your fault" I replied to her. She didn't look quite sure but just accepted it, she was looking terrified about something.

"what was that map about" I asked her as the picture of a orange scroll came in my mind

"that was a map which leads to dominium mundi, it is a latin word for universal domain" she replied while massaging her temples

"Those idiots have something which gives universal domain" I asked her

"That was a fake one, I am not even sure the map we have will lead to it or not but according to legend it leads to another clue in quest of Dominium mundi" she explained, giving me a weak smile

"I'm glad but didn't they knew it was a fake one" I asked her curious, I know they are stupid but still.

"that was a replica of the original one, which is in ministry secured I had to breach some laws, but I got it no one caught me so, I'm in no trouble" she nervously explained how she managed to fool the brothers.

"they would've known, if it was a fake one so , the replica had true informatios" I asked

"No, totally different information" she replied defensively "but one thing I'm sure about is they are heading to Britain now"

"they left, without killing us" I said, I kind of felt relieved.

"they got better work to do than killing us" she replied

"how did you get the map?" I asked her, I was curious

"We always had the map, We were securing it, So ministry placed a fake map, in the library where you usually go, I or sometimes my Friend, Linda was on the lookout for it" she divulged "Usually we were using invisibility clock, so no one was able to see us"

"Okay, it was for putting a fake trail for thief's" I asked her,

"totally, Metal brothers picked it, but the day they come, you were also there so I had to come out of my invisibility clock to hide you" she replied,

"Okay" I said surprised "It was all a plan, it was not like a coincidence you were there" she nodded.

"Sorry for putting your life in danger," she apologized again

"why didn't you let them take that fake map" I asked her,

"They would've left just like right now before we caught them" she said "like now they left" but she nervously smiled at me.

"Alright" I said, "what's the date today"

"it's 25" she mumbled

"WHAT!" I exclaimed "I- I was in that shack for four days - four days" she nervously nodded

"Oh no - today my uncle was supposed to go to Paris" I panicked "he must have cancelled It now, he would be a lot anxious – oh God!!", Gwen was looking everywhere but me, she looked pale, nervous.

"does m-my, Un-Uncle know" I stuttered "I am here", she just shook her head, there were tears in her eyes, why??

"why are you crying?" I asked anxiously "did I say something wrong – offensive"

"No" she breathed

"Then what" I asked her, I can hear myself I was panicking.

"I'm sorry, I didn't tell you the moment I came in here, I thought I would but I didn't had the courage -- then we started talking – I was just trying to say – but I wasn't able to" she stuttered while rubbing tears from her cheeks.

"what is it?" I asked her, I know something was wrong, I didn't feel at all good about hearing it.

"I'm sorry but your uncle is dead" she lamented

"WHAT!!" I shouted, "No no it can't happen, he just can't die, how ?? Why?? What happened when I was ?? Gone??" I didn't know what I was saying so many things were in my mind right now, I don't wanted to believe what she said but her face was telling it all.

"he died the day, Metal brothers abducted you, via illegal port key they transported you - I don't how I put a ward against that , I even sealed your home with an anti-Apparition charm, the way we disappear or reappear, so they could never have just apparate at your place, and I put every ward I can to protect you home, I knew if they somehow catch you, you will use the port key, but somehow they got in your home, I don't know how, and when I reached your home, there was body of your uncle on staircase, a killing curse, killed him and you were gone, at first I thought they killed you but then they contacted me" she told me what happened and I was angry, angry at everything with everything, I just wanted to find those bastard and kill them with my bare hands.

"He died because of me" I whispered

"No –

"HE DIED BECAUSE OF ME!" I screamed

"No, No-

"He died because of me and you," I accused her "you because – because of your stupid magical world, I was in this mess in first place and my uncle paid the price" I never wanted to say these words to her, but it was fault of her stupid magical world.

"I'm sorry" she apologized, but I didn't even look at her, I don't wanted to look at her, I won't forgive her, it I look at her, I'll.

"I don't want your sorry, never in my life come in front of me, I don't want to talk to you" I shouted while looking at her, for first time, I don't find her eyes bright or beautiful, I found them terrified, her face was ashen-faced , I liked it, that she felt terrible because I was feeling terrible.

"but-

"No just leave me alone" I shouted at her once again,

"Mr.-

"I said leave me alone – but then I realised it was not her voice I looked up and saw a Man in his twenties anxious.

"I'm sorry" I breathed,

"it is okay, Mr. Gluck, Sir I heard you screaming, that's why I came" he said

"I'm fine" I told him "can you leave me alone" the man curtly nodded before leaving.

26 November

.

JHONATHAN GLUCK

April 14 1943- November 21 1991

"I miss you" I breathed, "I'm sorry I was not even at your funeral"

"I'm really sorry about everything" I apologised, I knew, I was crying, I have never cried except when my parents died but after what happened, Uncle Joe was everything to me and my stupidity cost him, his life. I hate myself for it.

AN #1 : Stuart won't be returning soon for now, I'll write about him but later, I just thought about introducing him that I did.

(No-maj , Metal brothers, I hate myself)