"Did you know who rescued you?" the lakitu news reporter asked, extending his microphone.

"Well, they told me their names…" the pianta woman behind the fruit stand said, dubbed by the broadcast overlay as eyewitness. "But I've never been any good with those. I remember one of them was dressed like a princess and the other one was a tall guy with a mustache."

"Given we know Mario was involved, perhaps this mystery man was his brother Luigi?"

"Yeah! That sounds about like what they said."

"Then we can surmise that the woman was Princess Peach, known hero and sponsor of the brothers."

"Sure, that makes sense," the pianta woman said, looking impatient. "Are you going to buy a watermelon or what?

The lakitu whipped around to face the camera. "You heard it here folks! Predictably, it looks like today's Isle Delfino Rescue is the work of the famed Mario and his stalwart companions! This is Lakilucky, signing out for Kingdom News Network!"

"It was me!" Daisy said, yanking the flat screen TV off the wall. "I'm the one who saved you, you ungrateful fruit hustler!" She gave the monitor another shake. "ARGGH!"

Wanda gave Daisy a gentle pat on the shoulder. "There, there. Look on the bright side: We helped a lot of people."

"I GUESS." Daisy stepped out onto the balcony of the cabin and hurled the TV into the ocean. "Ugh!"

"Forget about Delfino," Waluigi said. He sat cross-legged on the sofa, thumbing through a paperback novel. "If we want to be big-name heroes, we play the long game. Wah. Once we're in Subcon we'll wallop Wart and make Mario look more chump than champ!"

"Okay, I still don't get this plan," Daisy said. "Aren't we just letting Mario collect all the dream gems?"

Waluigi held out the dream gem they just collected in his off hand. "He can't collect all of them if we've got one. We'll let him run around fussing over side quests while we take credit for fixing the real problem."

That made sense to Daisy. "What about this Subcon place? I've never even HEARD of it before. How do you know that's where this Wart guy is hanging out?"

"I used to live there," Waluigi said. "It's in the Dream World."

"Wait, really?" she said. "I thought you were making that up earlier."

He shrugged. "Lots of people come from Subcon. Like Birdo for instance."

"Oh yeah!" Daisy knew Birdo from kart racing and baseball and golf and tennis. She was good, but obviously not on Daisy's level. "I think she mentioned something like that once."

"Anyway," Waluigi said, "Wart is the ringleader of a gang that tried to take over the Dream World."

"Sounds like he failed?"

"Well, Mario came and stopped him," he closed his book. "Twice."

Daisy grumbled. "Of course he did."

"I have a cousin who lives in Subcon!" Wanda said. "It was built by us sprixies, y'know! It's a colony we set up in the Dream World to help out the Star Spirits."

Daisy did not know much about the Dream World, but she did have a little bit of history with it. She recalled a Super Star competition hosted by those spirits. Bowser crashed that party to seize control of something called the Dream Depot and it was a whole thing.

"Alright, so it's in the Dream World," she said, still skeptical. "That's like a wobbly cloud of half real places, right? I doubt we can just SAIL A SHIP there. Where are you taking us?"

Waluigi sighed. "There's two ways into the Dream World. Either someone on the other side LETS you in, or we need to open a portal. The easiest place to make a portal is on Pi'illo Island. That's where I told the Captain to take us."

"I haven't been to Subcon in AGES!" Wanda said, waggling her little legs on the end of the bed. "It's very pretty. I should know, I helped make it! We shaped it to be the nicest and most stable part of the whole Dream World!"

"That's nice," Daisy said.

"I did the bit with whales," she added, excited. "Them and the blocks. If you see any whales, that was me."

There was a loud CLANG and the whole ship shook. The cabin décor tumbled off the walls and everyone grabbed for something to hold onto as the boat rocked.

"What was THAT?!" Daisy said.

They ran out onto the main deck as another tremor rang across the hull of the ship. The crew was scrambling all over in a panic.

"What's going on?!" Daisy said.

"We're under attack!" Captain Pako said.

Daisy rushed to lean over the starboard railing and spotted a smaller barge below sailing alongside them. It was loaded up with large rocks and boulders and a giant crab, the biggest sidestepper Daisy had seen in her whole life, was hurling the stones at her ship.

"HEY KRILLFACE!" Daisy yelled. "Just what the heck do you think you're doing?!"

"Yarrr!" the crab bellowed. "I be Clawgrip! Of the 8-bits! I hear ye be causin' trouble for our plans, so I be here to sink ye!"

"Oh, he talks like a pirate," Wanda said. "That's sort of fun."

"No it isn't!" Waluigi said, furious.

Clawgrip lifted a rock the size of a car and flung it so hard it tore a gaping hole in the side of a ship. Waluigi turned and grabbed the Captain by his bulbous head.

"What're you waiting for?! Return fire!"

"With what?" Pako said. "We're a cruise ship! All I've got is baseballs and shuffleboard pucks!"

Everyone grabbed for the railing as another hole was ripped through the ship. A gao lion came bounding up from below deck.

"Cap'n!" he said. "We're takin' on water like crazy! We gotta abandon ship!"

"We'll be easy pickings for that devilish crustacean in the lifeboats…" the Captain said, stroking his chin. "It appears this voyage is doomed. Good thing I'm an octopus and can breathe underwater. Good luck everyone!"

With that, Pako hopped over the side of the ship and disappeared into the sea with a splash.

"Great," Daisy said. "I guess we'll just die then."

"Wait," Waluigi said, trying to keep balance as the ship swayed under his feet. "Wanda. You said you can make whales, right?"

"Well, if we were in the Dream World I could, sure," she said. "Out here, the best I can do is make blocks."

"Good enough!" Daisy said. She patched herself through to the ship's speakers to address the crew: "This is your princess speaking! All hands on deck! If you take damage in water or have an air meter, I suggest you get out here 'cause we're about to make a break for it!"

Lions and zombies and stonemen and bomb turtles gathered all in a hurry. Everyone crowded the deck with their eyes on Wanda.

"No pressure I guess," she said. "Geez. Alright." She pulled out a magic wand and hovered over to the edge of the ship where she flicked it in the air. A white block with a red diamond printed on each side poofed into existence. She flew alongside, waggling her wand and summoning blocks and creating a whole bridge of blocks to walk on.

"Alright! Single file everyone!" Daisy said, directing the traffic of the crowd. "There's no guardrail, so no shoving! If I see you shoving, I'll shove YOU!"

The crew clambered onto the block bridge as the ship started to tip, sinking faster and faster into the brine.

"Ye think you're gettin' away from me wrath?!" Clawgrip laughed, aiming his next rock. "Have at ye, ye land lovin' bilge rats!"

The rock smashed through the bridge and sent a tokotoko careening into the deep where he sank, appropriately, like a stone. The crew screamed and trembled, having nowhere to run and finding themselves target practice for Clawgrip.

Daisy maneuvered carefully around her panicking crew to where the next rock was being aimed. She was done with this freebooting shellfish and his buccaneer schtick.

"Wanda!" she waved for attention. "Get ready!"

"Ready for what?" Wanda said.

"Tell Jonathan Jones I sent ye!" Clawgrip shouted as he flung the next boulder. Daisy leapt off the block bridge and caught the boulder in midair. She yanked it over her head and fell.

"Wanda!" she said, "Now!"

The sprixie bolted through the air and summoned a block right under Daisy's feet just in time to catch her. She looked down at Clawgrip with a vengeful smile.

"Tell him yourself, crabmeat!" she said and returned fire. The stone smashed hard against Clawgrip's face and sent him reeling across his barge.

"Arrrrrggh!" he said, teetering. "How did ye know… that me one weakness… was having me own rocks thrown back at me…?"

Clawgrip toppled overboard. His legs twitched in the air as he sank from view.

Daisy exhaled. Wanda made a staircase of blocks back to the bridge and they rejoined the others. Behind them, the Daisy Cruiser gave one last gurgle as it dipped below the surface of the sea once and for all.

"Welp," Daisy said. "Looks like we're walking to Pi'illo island."