The snifits marched them into the palace past a wide array of guards, spike traps, and locked doors. Menacing red and white masks decorated the walls alongside the numerous band posters. They came to a halt outside a massive auditorium while the snifits consulted with a seating chart.
"What's the hold up?!" Daisy said.
"Shuddap you!" a snifit said. "We're trying to figure out where best to sit you bozos."
Waluigi tapped Daisy on the shoulder to get her attention and then pointed off to a door in the corner with a helpful sign reading "Hostage Room." Daisy pulled Wanda along and the three of them snuck away from the group while their captors were distracted.
The door creaked open into a hall with rows and rows of dungeon cells. Some of the prisoners responded to the noise by peering out of their cells at them. Wanda gasped.
"Sprixies!" she said. "This is where they're keeping the subcon sprixies!"
The sprixies murmured and whined for help from their cells as the three of them. Most of them wore red footie pajamas and had dweeby green bowl cut hairdos. They looked like prime rescue material.
Daisy swaggered in and gave one of the cell doors a firm rattle. It clanged on its deadbolt but would not budge. No good. She was not strong enough to tear it open. Not yet, anyway.
"I'm afraid a sturdy door like that requires a key," a voice said.
They turned to see a tall man inside one of the cells. He wore sunglasses and a purple suit adorned with an oversized ribbon bowtie. He had spiked blonde hair, a brown mustache, and a large, hooked nose. There was something familiar about him.
"Ah," he said, noticing Waluigi. "I must say, I did not expect to see my own son here of all places. I'd grown accustomed to the idea that you hated me and your homeland."
Waluigi banged his fist against the cell bars and startled him. "I ain't here for YOU, old man. I've got my own reasons to be here."
"Then you've fallen in with that Wart and his gang, have you?" He let out a beleaguered sigh. "I suspected as much. I regret being so lenient with you when you were a child. Perhaps then I could've kept you from straying so far from the path of virtue."
"Don't flatter yourself," Waluigi said. "I'd be me with or without your meddling."
Daisy looked between the two men, her eyes widening as the family resemblance sank in.
"Did I hear that right?" she said. "This guy is your father?!"
The suited man took a step back in his cell to perform an extravagant bow. "Commander Reverie of Subcon at your service." He stood up. "And yes, as much as it pains me, I must take credit for fathering this thug of a man."
Waluigi grunted in disgust.
"You didn't tell us you had a father!" Wanda said.
"I did mention it," Waluigi said, folding his arms. "But I loathe the reminder."
It was difficult for Daisy to process the idea that Waluigi had a family and was not just dumped in a ditch somewhere by the storks. She did her best to accept this reality and press on.
"Listen: we're not with the 8-bits," Daisy said. "Waluigi and I, and to a lesser extent Wanda, are here to save everybody."
Reverie adjusted his sunglasses. "Hm! So, a lady of your beauty and refinement would stand against Wart? Remarkable! I have not seen the like of it since Princess Peach herself came to our aid back when—"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Daisy said, annoyed.
"Fair warning, however. I doubt my son would help with this without some ulterior motive. Be careful he does not betray you."
"Shut up and tell us how to help you already!" Waluigi said.
"I'm afraid Wart himself has hidden the key," Reverie said. "Somehow he returned more powerful than ever."
"How could you let Wart take over again?" Waluigi said. "You should've killed him when you had the chance!"
The commander pinched his brow. "His Majesty has a soft heart. He preferred to seal Wart away in Subspace rather than execute him."
"Well, it looks like he clawed his way out of wherever that is and managed to make a wish on the Sundream Stone." Daisy said.
Reverie looked up. "That would explain why the sprixies here have lost their magic. We did not stand a chance."
"What's he even want with this place anyway?" Daisy said.
"Whoever controls Subcon controls the Dream Depot," Reverie said. "All dreams must travel through here to reach Star Hill, where they can crystalize into wishes that can come true. It is our responsibility to make sure that no evil dreams can become evil wishes and be granted."
Waluigi sneered. "And we're all so glad that you're here to pass judgment on good and evil for us."
Reverie locked eyes with him. "And I suppose you think that sorcerer, Wart, will do a better job?"
"At least a tyrant doesn't pretend to treat everyone equal," Waluigi said.
"Cut it out!" Wanda said, fluttering between them. "We're here to help, so stop fighting!"
"Bah," Reverie said.
"Wah," Waluigi said.
"Whatever," Daisy growled. "All we need to do is take the key back, right? Let's go thrash Wart and get it over with!"
"Wait!" Reverie gripped the bars of his cell. "If Wart has had a wish granted, things are much worse than I thought. It is much too dangerous for you to confront him! But if you could get word to a hero, perhaps Mario then…"
"We can handle Wart!" Daisy said.
"You just sit there and wait, got it?" Waluigi said. "We're doing things my way this time!"
The two of them swept toward the exit, leaving Wanda behind.
"Uh," Wanda said. "Don't worry! We're definitely going to save you! …I think."
"Hurry up!" Daisy said, holding the door for Wanda. She zipped through to join them.
The main hall was vacant. It looked like the snifits had moved on with the New Donkers already. The auditorium just ahead seemed the best place to search for Wart. Daisy looked over at Waluigi. His sneer was dour, lacking the humor and mischief that made it so fun.
"You don't get along with your dad, huh?"
Waluigi made a noise somewhere between a grunt, scoff, and a growl. Which was basically a yes.
It was hard for Daisy to imagine having such a strained relationship with family. She was grateful for her own father, no matter how bumbling he could be. Mom was… demanding back when she was around but it was only ever for Daisy's own good. No matter how hard it got Daisy could never hate her the way Waluigi seemed to hate his father. But maybe that was because she still remembered what it was like to live without family.
They entered the auditorium to find a giant ornate opera stage with vast rows and tiers of seating, enough to fit a whole kingdom. It was all red velvet curtains and extravagantly carved wood molding. The craftsmanship on every fixture and seat was incredible.
"Mmmhff!"
A muffled cry drew Daisy's attention. Oh. There were hostages too.
"My yoshis!" Wanda said, racing toward a rainbow assortment of yoshis who were muzzled and chained down to a row of seats. "What are you all doing here?!"
"Mrrmmff!" they looked up at her, helpless. Daisy felt a stab of pity as the yoshis struggled with their bindings.
"These are the yoshis from your forest?" Daisy said. "The ones who can't wake up?"
"Yeah! These must be their dreamy counterparts!"
"Those New Donkers are over there!" Waluigi said, pointing at a row of balconies. "They've got people from all over chained up!"
"Then let's untie everyone and get them out of here!" Wanda said.
"Not so fast, small fry."
The lights shut off and cast the room into complete black. Spotlights snapped open with a SHUNT and lit up the stage with a blinding glow. Shy guys sprinted across the stage carrying buckets of dry ice, spreading a mysterious fog. A trap door opened, and an elevator stage rose from the depths carrying a massive, robed figure. Sparklers and fireworks went off as a rotund frog man came into view and struck a fabulous pose. He was Bowser-sized, with a crown and blue robe with gold trim. A coin medallion dangled on a gold chain around his neck. He smirked.
"I'm so flattered you'd show up to our dress rehearsal," he said, cloying and warbling, "I'm sure we can find a seat for you if you ask nicely."
"You must be Wart!" Daisy said, pointing.
He clasped a claw over his heart. "Guilty. There really is no hiding from one's public. Though, a real fan might know me better as the Artist Formerly Known as Mamu. But you aren't even a casual fan are you? You're those interlopers who keep causing trouble: The gangly schemer and the Peach look-alike, whatever your names are."
"That's DAISY and WALUIGI!" Daisy said through gritted teeth. "I get why you don't know who HE is, but I'm a PRINCESS! I run a whole COUNTRY for Stars sake! It's not that hard!"
Wart chuckled. "No one cares about politics, sweetie. Not when you've got entertainers like us stealing the show! And soon eyes and ears the world over will be focused squarely on ME and at last I will finally get the respect I deserve!"
"Not if we get you to croak first, you bug-munching windbag!" Waluigi said.
"Just try it," Wart said and spat out a barrage of bubbles that arched through the air and slammed into the floor and furniture with the force of bowling balls. Waluigi pulled Wanda out of the way of the next wave and he and Daisy dodged around the saliva salvo as woodwork burst and splintered around them. The orchestra pit burst into life as a band of shy guys, tweeters, and ninji struck up a suitably epic final boss tune. Daisy and Waluigi charged down the alley and managed to leap on stage where they stood off against the overgrown toad.
"Not bad!" Wart said. "But can you handle this?"
He lifted a hand and inky black energy gathered in his palm. The audience screamed behind their gags and thrashed as swirl of rainbow stardust shot out of them and gathered inside the black orb.
"Augh!" Wanda groaned as energy was siphoned out of her tiny body. Waluigi held her, eyes wide in alarm.
"He's targeting the dreamers!" Waluigi said.
Wart clenched the ball of power and it snapped. A glow of star speckled dark energy enveloped his whole body, and his grin somehow became even more smug.
"What'd you do to them?!" Daisy cried.
"Don't worry about it!" Wart said. "It's nothing compared to what I'm about to do to YOU."
Daisy cracked her knuckles and stomped towards the frog. She was done talking. She reared back and slammed her fist square in his gut.
Or that's what should have happened. Instead, a luminous black force field caught her fist before she could make contact. Wart looked down at her and chuckled at her effort. Daisy wasn't about to be denied the satisfaction and laid into the forcefield with a quintuple punch combo and roundhouse kick that did not so much as put a scratch in the barrier. Wart's chuckle turned into full borne laughter. He flicked her nose with the tip of his finger and it hit like a truck. Daisy sailed backward off stage and crashed into the theater pit seating where she lay sprawled and unable to move.
An explosion shook Daisy out of her stupor. She looked up and saw Waluigi fishing bob-ombs out of the stage pyrotechnics rigging and hucking them one after another at Wart.
"Give up!" Waluigi said, not letting up until every last bob-omb was thrown, "Wyahh! You'll never defeat the Great Waluigi!"
The smoke cleared and Daisy's heart sank. Wart was unharmed and worse, he was laughing. He wiped a tear away and flicked it at Waluigi. It exploded on contact and a charred Waluigi collapsed to his knees.
"Wah," he said before slumping onto the floor. "Everyone cheating but me…"
Wart swept back toward center stage. "Well, this has been fun but a big name like me does not have the free time to squander on nobodies like you two. I've got my world tour to plan and dream gems to collect, you understand. Which is why I can't have clowns like you interfering!"
Daisy strained to move her body, crawling across the debris back towards the stage. She could still fight. There was no way this was over yet.
"Now, I bet you're wondering what could possibly be worse than having your dreams sucked out," Wart said. "Are you ready? I bet the suspense is killing you."
Wart held out his hand and the cosmic energy gathered there again. He slammed his fist into the stage and a shockwave rumbled through the foundation of the castle. The ground around Daisy started to melt into inky black slime and she sank. She thrashed to get out and spat but could find nothing solid to grab onto. She saw the limp bodies of Waluigi and Wanda disappear into the black before her and started to panic.
Wart waved goodbye as goop filled Daisy's vision.
"Have fun in Subspace, darlings," he said.
And then everything went black.