Chapter 10 - I'm no sweet dream

"It has nothing to do with you Itachi, I didn't think you'd follow me." He said quietly to him, yet his eyes were still on her. He could tell he was not very happy with his presence, angry even.

"It may have nothing to do with me for now. But what about her? What if she will find out?" Itachi almost spat out almost venomously, yet Shisui still remained silent.

"Don't forget that you are going to become the next clan head soon, so you should be looking out after your fiancé instead of chasing my little brother's teammate." Itachi's voice was quietly silky, not letting anyone overhear their intimate conversation. Without another word the younger cousin left first, leaving the older one behind.

That day on the way home pinkette had a hard time covering her excitement, yet she still tried to hide it with some pointless chatter. She ended up telling him about an experiment on chakra transfer that she was going to perform the next day. She went into such technical details that she couldn't believe he didn't tell her to drop the topic. Or to shut up. But then again, she had to remind herself that Shisui wasn't a normal Uchiha.

When she waved him cheerful goodbye and closed the door behind her, she could finally release a sigh of relief. And annoyingly for the rest of the evening she felt inexplicably moody– inexplicably because what did happen in the end? He just walked her home and as much as she didn't want to admit it nothing else happened. Was the older Uchiha just teasing her? She could only wonder.

The next day Sakura woke up in a great mood, and the day seemed to be complying. The experiment at the hospital worked out at the first attempt, all the controls were fine and the effect was clearly visible. She immediately got couple of ideas for the follow-up tests. Then, in the afternoon, exactly when she was falling asleep over the paperwork due for that day, a sudden thunderstorm rolled over Konoha leaving the air fresh and Sakura's head rejuvenated. She finished her report so fast that it surprised her. She was going to the kitchen for the personnel to bring back her dirty coffee cups when looking through the window of the staircase she thought she was having a deja vu: Shisui was standing under the tree in exactly the same pose as yesterday. She had enough sense to return the cups to the kitchen, come back upstairs, gather her things and face him with fake surprise. She wasn't so sure if he bought it. But certainly, the Uchiha had enough brains to notice that her joy was not faked by any means.

On their way home she babbled nervously again, and to her surprise he really seemed to be listening. And then he swept her from her feet asking how the experiment went. She got so much caught up in explaining her results that they stood in from of her door for at least fifteen minutes until she was finished. She considered inviting him in, but at the last minute the pink haired woman decided against it. For some reason she felt embarrassed.

The next day she thought out an excuse to go downstairs and pass the staircase already at 5 p.m. She tried to keep cool head about it, and started to talk herself into not being disappointed when she couldn't believe her own eyes – he was there again. She didn't wait until 6 p.m. to scram.

And when he walked her home for the 4th time this week she decided that today was the day she would invite him in. Apparently somewhere at the back of her head there was a dull voice telling her that she had to work on her mission, but whenever she thought about it she would just get all embarrassed because going on a mission would mean doing things with Shisui…again. And for some reason she felt scared and she just couldn't get her head around it, what was so difficult about having sex with someone? What was so difficult about being intimate with someone on a physical level? She knew the longer she would wait the worse it would get for both of them. She was starting to grow afraid of the feelings and responsibility that might come with it. And yet for the past few days she caught herself wishing for Shisui to make a move.

"Mind coming in?" She asked shyly while facing the ground. She heard a soft chuckle. "Sure.".

Her apartment doors closed with a soft click as she turned around gesturing Shisui to the black leather sofa in her living room. "Would you like some tea?" She asked awkwardly attempting to make some sort of a conversation.

"I wouldn't mind." She could feel him smiling.

Tea was almost her meditation. When she made some of her blends, it was like being a mad scientist, without the magic or volatility of potion making. It was chemistry without it exploding or possibly turning her bright pink hair blue for a week. It was just some fun she had and liked to keep as a hobby outside of her work and tough ninja missions. Tea was Sakura's safety circle in some senses, and she was already a little uncomfortable with Shisui being there. But there he was, sitting peacefully in her living room.

Sakura startled herself from her thoughts, and began to move about the kitchen. A few seconds later the kettle was already filled with water that was waiting to be boiled.

Shisui couldn't help but notice how skilled she was, the last time he was here he didn't pay much attention to her tea making skills, but now his eyes were carefully following her graceful movements with hidden amusement.

"So what are the choices today, Miss pink tea?" Shisui asked, glancing at Sakura's massive drawer of tea that she was about to open.

Sakura snorted. "Miss pink tea?"

"New nickname, trying it out." He shrugged.

Sakura glanced up at all of the plants hanging from the ceiling of her small apartment.

"I just recently bagged some newer blends," The pinkette mused, moving to a drawer and sliding it out. "What are you feeling today?" She asked, green eyes carefully skimming over her perfectly printed labels.

"Hmm, how about green tea?" Shisui hummed, and Sakura nodded.

"Preference?" He shook his head, and Sakura pulled out a scoop. She tapped the blend of tea into an infuser dropping the little metal ball into a mug with a clink. Sakura glanced over to Shisui.

" Just so you know…because you might consider changing your decision" She started shyly as if embarrassed to share her thoughts. "There are tea categories, white, black, oolong, herbal, mate. I also sort them by caffeine and intention. Like herbal blends, energy blends, some detox blends-"

"I'm thinking tea is too complicated for me, just do whatever you want," Shisui interrupted while propping his chin up with his hands, he felt mesmerized by her knowledge of teas but he felt as if it was a topic he knew very little about. Sakura could only sigh in return grabbing the teapot and pouring boiling hot water into Shisui's cup.

"Don't worry im going to convert you into the tea." The pinkette said with noticeable determination in her voice whilst handing a hot cup of tea into Shisui's hands. And when their fingertips touched for a brief second Shisui mumbled softly. "I don't know what you're talking about," while taking the mug from Sakura's hands.

The pinkette chuckled taking a seat next to Shisui, for a moment she felt normal all awkwardness gone for a second. Through the corner of his black crimson eyes Shisui followed her movements taking her in. He noticed that she had the annoying habit of twirling her hair around one finger, biting onto her perfectly glossed lower lip as she was sitting just a bit too close to him. Her white lab coat was was about to slide down her shoulder almost revealing her perfectly silky skin beneath. Her long pink hair albeit a bit messy was resting on her back reaching her rear. And her soft plump lips were reaching out for the cup of tea.

A second later Sakura was starting to feel uneasy again, she didn't know what to say to Shisui, which was rare considering that for the past few days all she did was ramble to him about her life and work almost nonstop. Her green eyes stared at the cup of tea that was resting in her palms. She knew she couldn't stay silent. She was starting to curse herself, just why did she have to say those things to Shisui a couple of days ago? Unfinished business? She was out of her mind, honestly. Good at only making things awkward she noted.

She tilted her head, letting that long hair of hers fall onto her shoulder. "What do you think about my tea? Do you like it?" She asked Shisui shyly, a slight rosy blush was spreading across the tip of her nose.

Shisui felt out of place for a second before answering. "I've never had anything like this before. The taste is very rich and zesty. Is that lemon?" He answered honestly, finding himself being surprised. The woman did really know how to make tea afterall.

Sakura couldn't help but smile, the rosy tint on her nose started spreading across her cheeks tinting them a lighter pinky shade.

"This is one of my favourites, lemon green tea. I made it myself by gathering the leaves from the lemon tree and mixing it with the dry lemon zest." She said while facing Shisui. He could tell she was getting excited.

"I see." That's all he said. A few minutes more passed, and they were sitting in silence occasionally sipping tea. Sakura was still as nervous as ever but Shisui's mind was somewhere else completely.

The woman near him was intoxicating, beautiful, feminine, smart, she was a breath of fresh air, a glimpse into a brighter future. She was everything he did not deserve, nor did he have a right to claim her for himself anyways. He knew he should stop before it's too late it wasn't fair to use her his own selfish needs with the excuse of "helping". It was even worse when Shisui realised he was starting to feel a certain way about her which was not allowed in any case. Yet he could not deny the fact that he felt calm and relaxed around her, she was so different compared to all the other women that were once in his bed, yet she couldn't beat Izumi, at this point he thought she was still not enough.

And deep down he knew he shouldn't be doing this, after all he knew way too well, he would be marrying Izumi in a few years' time. He wanted her, no he loved her, after all she was his fiancée and she was the most important person to him, Itachi and Izumi have been through everything with him, they helped Shisui a lot and were always by his side no matter what. And for now Shisui felt as if Izumi was the only one suitable for him, she was pure, gentle, untouched. He couldn't stop thinking about her, he wanted her, she was the only woman that wouldn't let him put a claim on her. He knew he would have her in his bed in a few years' time, but he also knew that she wouldn't be willing to do it voluntary. She will not open up to him, not even in a million years. She has always seen Shisui as her older brother, as a part of a family, but never as a lover, never as a man. It was always Itachi wasn't it? Itachi stole away the only person that mattered to him the most, and yet Itachi couldn't give a single fuck about Izumi's feelings. Shisui could only wonder what made him ignore Izumi's feelings. Was it because she was given to Shisui? Out of respect to his family? He would never know, yet Shisui knew that Itachi was always aware of Izumi's feelings for him and it was just making Shisui's blood boil. And because of that Shisui never did anything, he didn't want to hurt Izumi's feelings by forcing himself on her so he decided that one of the best ways to let out his pent-up frustrations would be by using other people, women in particular. He was aware that it made him look like a playboy, like a dick, everything but a decent man. He knew that way too well, but he was way too deep already, he was beyond help, it seemed that his only light was Izumi.

For the past few days that Shisui was walking Sakura home all he could think about was that he wanted to touch her, he wanted to put his claim on her as well, just like he did with all the others, but he couldn't. It was one time he couldn't, because all he could hear was Itachi's words ringing in his head "You have a fiancée.". And for thefirst time in his life since forever he actually felt guilty. He knew Sakura deserved way better, and maybe just maybe if it would be another place and time sometime in another life, he would choose Sakura over Izumi. But it wasn't a different time and place nor another life, it was just a sad fucked up reality of his.

"Is there's something bothering you?" Sakura couldn't help but notice the way Shisui was acting. She could tell he was feeling tense and she couldn't grasp the reason behind it. She was clueless. Did she say something wrong? Did she do anything at all? This man was still a secret to her, she knew he had a shell that she couldn't crack. This time around she actually felt helpless, she did not know how to comfort him.

"It does not concern you, Sakura." She flinched under the threat in his voice, she felt her muscles tensing. She didn't know what to say, it seemed that everything she tried would just end up backfiring at her. But she just couldn't understand, for some reason she just couldn't let go, for some reason she just cared…

"Shisui, tell me, who am I to you?" she said while glancing up at all of the plants hanging from the ceiling of her living room. She didn't know why she asked. The pink haired woman knew the answer already, and yet she asked anyways. She knew she wasn't special, she knew what type of man Shisui was. And yet at the end of the day she was just an idiot, an idiot who cared too much about other people and their lives. And idiot who was willing to trust people way too easily, an idiot who was willing to let people in into her life without a second thought of getting burned. She just couldn't let it go, she didn't know why she cared so much about him, was it because he was helping her? Was it because he knew her secret? No this can't be it. If it were just that she would never in a million years would've offered him her company. Because at the end of the day, pinkette knew she would rather have him comeback to her bed in search of comfort. What was even worse was that somewhere deep in her heart she despised the idea of Shisui having someone else, and to be truthful it was terrifying. It was never meant to happen, things on her side were just going out of control. Sakura knew that this wouldn't last, she just had to get it over with. It was the wisest decision, the most logical one she could come up with. The pink haired woman decided that tonight she would end this all of this, she would give herself to Shisui in order to save her clan, to unlock the true power of the seal.

It took Shisui a couple of minutes to answer, he was caught off guard by that question of hers. The older Uchiha never thought about it. What Sakura meant to him? He enjoyed their conversations, and he thought she was a smart woman, and to be truthful he felt like they were way more than just acquaintances, their relationship leaned more towards that of being friends, maybe even good friends. At the end of the day Sakura was a good person, she was caring and gentle, shit she was someone that could've been his potential partner be it a few years ago, but now all he could offer her was just being friends…with benefits. It was logical, it was the most logical decision, they both gained something from this relationship and there was nothing to lose. Although, Shisui knew this was wrong, he knew he should end this, but he couldn't Sakura just wouldn't let him, and he would not dare to cross the pink haired woman's boundaries. He could've ended it on the first night he met her, they could've just fucked but he couldn't… Upon seeing those piercing inexperienced green eyes that were shaking from fear he knew he couldn't do it. She was not ready by any means, and he could respect that.

"I think we are… friends?" He said as if he wasn't sure himself, as if he was asking himself the same question as well.

"I see." Was all that she said. Her answer was blunt and short, void of any emotion in it. She knew she wasn't special, she knew that from the very beginning, she also knew the answer before it even came out of his lips. And yet her heart throbbed painfully, just at what point in time did she start do develop these feelings for him? She couldn't tell.

And as if all of this wasn't enough, she thought of torturing herself even more as she decided to ask him. "That person who is most important to you. Who is she? Tell me." Sakura barely recognized her own voice, raspy, filled with emotion. She always had a feeling his heart wasn't so easy. She saw him as a cheerful person, but she knew there was something more, something way deeper than he was letting out for her to see.

One blink. Then another. His brows furrowed in confusion before he asked, "Why?".

"Tell me, please…" Her voice was haunting in the dark room. Her teeth were sinking into her plump bottom lip to the point of almost drawing blood.

The tension he felt rising gradually clutched tight in his chest.

"It doesn't concern you, but I will tell you one thing. She does not feel the same way about me." A heady mixture of anger, anxiety, and hurt coalesced into burning impatience that finally pushed him out of his seat, and it took everything in him to plaster on a smile as he excused himself to her heading towards the exit, trying to make his way out of her apartment.

She got up immediately trying to block him from leaving. Her small petite figure forced itself out in the front trying to stop him from leaving. Because she knew if he would've left now, he would never comeback. Her small hands were resting on his broad shoulders soothing him, trying to calm him down, trying to make him stay.

But the way he flew along the dimly lit corridor in her small apartment, pushing her into the wall whilst letting the thick cloud of anxiety fill the air which was now on his breath rising to his nostrils with every pounding beat of his heart, revealed an inconvenient truth: at this point it would be hard for him to stay out of her life. Because gradually…insidiously…he was a selfish bastard who urged to satisfy his needs, a bastard that wanted both things at the same time.

So his arms shot out to enfold her, holding her tightly to his chest as he pressed her even harder against the wall, fingers tightening around delicate wrists to pin her in place and brook no argument as she stared wide-eyed into the savage darkness of his gaze.

"What can you offer me?" he murmured flatly against her hair, hoping she wasn't aware of his question.

He moved carelessly claiming her neck with his lips. His large hands kept her close while playfully slinking underneath the shirt hem he's released from the safety of its prim tuck in her skirt. An attempt to distract her from his question. He heard a stifled moan leaving her lips and soon her white lab coat found itself fully discarded on the cold corridor floor.

And when Shisui accepted her moan as an answer, she spoke, the sound of her hesitant voice drawing Shisui's attention as much as the beauty of her dimly lit exotic features.

"That's…that's not the point and you know it," she exhaled, her voice shaky. "Yet the only thing I can offer to you is myself." He could see her green spring-like eyes clouded with concern, with fear, with lust. Mixed, raw emotions were just dancing in her eyes.

Her voice was haunting in the dark, and it unnerved him to think of how deliriously relieved he felt to hear those words coming out of her mouth. The tension clutched tight in his chest gradually unfurled to the point where he could breathe again.

"I will give myself to you…tonight, that is if you wish for that to happen." She said her voice still held its shakiness. "You can think of me as if I was her if… if that would make you feel any better." Her voice came out as a mumble, her eyes bored into the ground, too afraid to face him, too afraid to see his reaction.

Shisui felt shocked for a split second after hearing her bold statement, but then he found his lips curving into a smile.

"Very well then." Suddenly she felt the cool air glide against her skin and the pinkette realised that he's taking her shirt up with him to stroke her sides. "You asked for it yourself, never forget that." His voice was dark, darker than she ever heard it. It was scary, it was bizarre, and at that moment she was lost way beyond redemption. And the next thing she knew she felt his charged touches on her skin his fingertips pressing into the flesh just enough that she swore she felt her heels lift from the floor.

Author's note

I'm finally back! I've been really busy for the past couple of months and working 6 or 7 days in a row. I did not have any time to sit down and actually write something. But for the last couple of days I felt really inspired and decided to write a new chapter. Poured my heart and soul into this, so let me know what you think! All of your comments are really appreciated and I can't believe we are almost up to 200 people who are following my drabble! Thank you so much, it means a lot to me! Hopefully before the new chapter comes out we could hit 85-90 reviews on this story! Anyways, good news im going on a holiday for a few weeks, so ill be away from work which means I'll have the time to actually sit down and write something!