Chapter Five: The Meaning of Knife
Sesshoumaru took a step back, edging away from Kagome.
"Wait!" she called to him, taking two steps for his one. "Please don't go."
He paused.
She swallowed, pushing down the anxiety that crept in her throat. As Inuyasha's enigmatic older brother, she didn't know much about him, except that he wasn't above violence when things weren't in his favor. Or even when they were for that matter. She didn't want to fight him. She just saved him.
He glanced at the nearby fence, sizing up its height.
"A lot has changed since the Sengoku Jidai," she warned, finding her voice. "The company of an ally might be nicer than a city of strangers, don't you think? If you stay, I promise to explain everything that I can."
He snorted. "Where am I?"
"Tokyo."
"Tokyo? What's Tokyo?"
"I'm sorry. This region used to be Edo, but it's now known as Tokyo."
He nodded. "How long was I sealed?"
"I don't know. Ever since I wished the Shikon-no-Tama into nothingness, I haven't been able to go back through the well. My family and I just found you a few days ago in Midoriko's cave."
"Strange," he said to himself.
She waited, hoping for an explanation. However, the silence wore on, and her patience thinned. "What do you mean by strange?"
"Show me the well."
Still confused and now annoyed that her question had gone unanswered, she beckoned as she started to walk away. "It's over here. Come with me."
Keeping a slow pace, she led him across the grounds and towards a small shed. Emptiness washed over her as she climbed up the familiar steps, and she slid the old door open. Sunlight poured in, revealing a square well in the shadows.
"It looks familiar," he noted.
"It's the Bone-Eater Well. It's how I traveled from my time to yours.
"How?"
"I just jumped down it. By accident the first time, but I traveled through it continuously for about a year, living my two lives."
"Then you are simply human."
Kagome blushed, embarrassed by his insinuation that she might be something supernatural. She hadn't realized how she might seem to someone who had known her first in the past, and now in the present as well.
"I'm Kikyo's reincarnation," she explained. "Since the jewel was burned with her body, I was born with it inside of me. I think because of that, I could travel to your time and back again at will."
"And when Naraku was defeated, you were returned here."
She nodded.
"Strange."
"Why do you keep saying that?"
Keeping silent, he turned around and left the shed.
The first sparks of anger smoldered in her chest and she chased after him. "I've been truthful with you. You should be honorable and do the same with me. What's strange?"
"This has nothing to do with honor, but with respect."
"Then be respectful and answer me."
"I will not," he refused, stopping his trek across the courtyard to confront her. "As a lord, I'm entitled to respect, a courtesy that is undeserving of a nameless human who has yet to earn it. Learn your place or your lesson will be harsher."
Her fury ignited. "I'm not nameless! I am Higurashi Kagome!"
"That's not what I was referring to."
"If that's not it, then you mean your lordship. That by being a daiyoukai, you believe that you're better than everyone else? Well, I've got news for you. It might only be a few months for me, but it's been five hundred years since Naraku's defeat and nothing is the same. There are no youkai here. Not one. Humans rule everything. We do what we want now, and for once, you need to respect us." Her voice lowered as she let her last words cut. "You're a lord without people. A lord of nothing."
Breathing hard, she glared at him, victorious. Then her triumph tarnished.
Shock drained what little color he had from his face.
Five hundred years pass, and everything he had was a memory. She had gone too far. Worrying so much about him awakening and what he might do had put her on edge all week. She had expected a fight, and when there wasn't one, she started one.
"I'm sorry," she apologized, her eyes softening. "I don't know for certain. There could be some youkai out there that I haven't been able to sense."
"No, you're correct," he said, "I'm the last one. I'm a lord without people. A lord of nothing."
"No, that's not true…" she began to disagree.
He turned away from her, limping towards the house. Soon he disappeared inside, leaving her alone.
Frustrated and angry at her bullheadedness, she paced, recounting events and how she could have gone about it without ripping an injured man a new wound. She would stitch it up when she saw him next, at least she hoped that she could.
Looking up, she spied her mother walking towards her, a frilled apron tied around her waist.
"Mama, I screwed up," she admitted, miserable. "He's not awake for fifteen minutes, and I've already made things worse."
Leaning close, Mama hugged her around her shoulders. "Don't be too hard on yourself. A lot has happened to you over the last year and a half. More has been expected of you than should be demanded from anyone, let alone a teenage girl."
"I just wish I had handled it better. Sometimes I forget about the different customs." She looked up, catching her eyes. "I think I hurt his feelings."
"He'll understand," she soothed. "He may be a youkai, but he's still a man and like most, he just needs time to think. You can make amends with him later."
"All right."
Mama smiled. With her arm still around her shoulders, she pulled Kagome towards the house. "Besides, I'm fixing steak in honor of our new guest's recovery. Dogs like steak, don't they?"
Kagome giggled. "I hope so."
"I wonder if he'll be like Inuyasha and love ramen too."
She shook her head and laughed. "Somehow, I think his tastes are probably too refined for ramen."
Mama frowned. "That's too bad. Inuyasha was such a cheap boy to feed."
Soon they reached the porch and passed through the door leading into the kitchen. A rush of savory aromas met them, and Kagome's stomach gurgled with anticipation. On the stovetop, saucepans bubbled, and Mama surrendered her daughter to make sure that none of them had burned. Fresh vegetables were spread out on the counter, each washed, trimmed, and ready to be chopped. Satisfied that all was cooking well, Mama left the stove for the refrigerator and retrieved a paper-wrapped package of meat.
"Can I help?" Kagome asked.
"Of course," she replied, and she gestured to the counter. "Could you finish dicing the daikon while I trim the steaks, please?"
"No problem!"
Walking to the sink, Kagome washed her hands and searched for her apron in the drawer. Finding it, she tied it on and rolled up her sleeves. Picking up the half-finished radish, she repositioned it on the cutting board and looked for the knife. Not finding it beside the cutting board, she looked around the counter and under the other vegetables.
"Mama, where's the knife?"
"The vegetable knife?"
"Yeah."
"It should be there."
"I can't find it."
"I set it down on the cutting board before I went outside."
"It's not here. The daikon was the only thing on the cutting board. I've checked all over the counter and I looked in the sink. It's gone."
"I wonder where it went." Mama walked towards the hallway and yelled into the family room. "Souta, did you take my vegetable knife?"
"No!" came a distant reply.
Mama hummed. "If he doesn't have it, then I'm not sure what happened to it. It's strange."
"Strange," Kagome murmured, and she blanched. "Sesshoumaru."
Bolting out of the kitchen, she ran down the hallway. Focusing her powers, she searched for his presence. He was upstairs. Not sparing a moment to slow down, she made for the stairs and flew up them, taking each step two at a time and nearly stumbling at the top. She was such a stupid girl. How could she tell him that he was a lord without people? That he was a lord of nothing? His title was all that he had left. She was so stupid, and so was bushido. Stupid warrior culture and their death before honor rules.
Attempting to sneak in close to his room, her footfalls softened. The sliding door was cracked open. Through the gap, she peeked in and her hand rose to her mouth to stifle a gasp. Spilled across the floor was silver hair, its strands glinting beautifully in the light.
"Oh no."
Behind her, she felt Mama and Souta walk up. Looking back at them, she realized what she had to do. Even though she didn't want to look, she couldn't subject anyone else to her mistake.
"Wait here," she told them as she reached for the handle. Closing her eyes, she pulled the door down its track and gasped.
Bathed in the sunlight at the center of the room was Sesshoumaru. The knife still in his hand, he knelt, surrounded by swirls of his shorn hair. With his longest locks reaching his neck, the rest was ragged and uneven where he had cut it.
"Sesshoumaru?" she whispered.
Ignoring her, he looked out the window.
"Sesshoumaru?" she said louder.
Silence.
Taking a step into the room, she called out again. "Sesshoumaru? Are you all right?"
"I am now."
"Because you cut off your hair?"
"I am not a lord any longer," he admitted. "I am a being without a time or a place. I have no purpose. I do not deserve the hair of a lord. Of a warrior. My honor will not permit it." Pushing off his knees, he rose to his feet and walked towards her.
She backed up until she felt Souta behind her.
Twirling the knife as he neared, he caught it by the back of the blade and handed it to Mama. "My apologies, Higurashi-san. I took it without your permission."
She smiled, accepting it. "There's no need." She gestured to his hair. "Would you like me to even that out for you?"
Mulling over her offer for a moment, he then nodded politely. "It would be appreciated."
"My scissors are downstairs."
"I will accompany you."
"And how do you feel about ramen?"
"Ramen?"
Brushing past Kagome, he left with Mama. Lingering behind, she and Souta stared at the pools of hair, still mystified. Then Souta spoke up.
"Damn, he's hardcore."
She nodded.
"At least he didn't kill himself."
She nodded again.