"Congratulations!" Frankie and Nina shouted as they came onto the deck, where Jane was sitting and reading. Their two kids immediately ran into the garden to join Julia and Sophie on a late summer afternoon.
Jane sighed and put the book aside to greet them with a hug. "Well, congratulations to you too!" she said with a smile. Even if her mother had changed a lot, some things never changed. Jane was sure that Angela had picked up the phone the moment they had left the house to call some relatives despite having promised to keep it a secret.
"Funny." Frankie stated during the following conversation. "I always thought that Maura would carry the child if you were to have another one."
"Frankie!" Nina scolded him, slapping him slightly onto the arm. Jane rolled her eyes.
"Excuse me?" he said "Why cant I say that?"
"Its okay." Maura laughed. "We did discuss about it. Jane indeed wanted me to carry the child. I wanted her. It was a blood test which decided." She shrugged.
"Yes. And not in my favor. I'm going to gain weight and I won't be able to see my feet. No wonder I had to do it." Jane grunted half-jokingly. She bent over to smooth Maura's pouted face with a soft kiss. "I love you even if you make me go through this." She said.
"You're not making it better." Maura said in dismay taking a sip from her juice.
Frankie got slapped again when he laughed. "That's not funny." Nina scolded him, remembering how she felt the last time she was pregnant.
"Jeez" Frankie muttered. Everybody seemed relieved when they directed their conversation to safer grounds.
R&I
"You know that I've been joking, when I complained earlier, right?" Jane said when Maura came out of the bathroom. The brunette had noticed that the blonde was still a bit mad at her and assumed that it was because of her comment.
"You know that I like to complain. But I'm happy and I'm looking forward to have the baby." She added quickly.
Maura slipped into the bed sighing. "I know that, Jane."
Of course, she knew. She was her best friend and sometimes Maura knew Jane better than the brunette did herself.
"So, what's the matter than?" Jane gazed at her. She was surprised when Maura turned in bed to rest her had on Janes belly after kissing it.
"I don't know." Maura started and stopped when Jane scoffed. It wasn't as if she didn't read Maura, like the blonde did her.
"Just spill it, baby." The brunette stated, caressing over the blondes face and hair. It took Maura some time to reply. But when she did it warmed Janes heart. "It's just that I'm a bit jealous sometimes. I still believe that its best that you carry the child. But seeing you sometimes makes me want to life that experience again. Without morning sickness and swollen feet of course." The blonde smirked.
"A joke, Maur? Really?" Jane laughed softly at Maura's grin. "I don't know how man do it? They must want to know what it feels like." The blonde mused out loud.
"I have no clue about what they think about this. But you know how it feels. This is why you are so attentive." Came the deep voice from Jane.
"Yes. I know. But its been a while. Im don't remember everything. How do you feel right now?"
Jane lifted an eyebrow and thought about the question. "Uhm, It's difficult to explain. My body doesn't feel any different, it seems to be the same. Yet at the same I know that something is there growing inside of me." She silently watched as Maura drew small circles onto the skin of her stomach.
She made a mental note to tell the blonde more often how it felt. She seemed to need this form of involvement.
"What if you were right and we are too old for this." Maura whispered. Jane made a dismissive gesture with her hand and snorted. "Forget what I said. We are not too old for this. It is going to be wonderful. We get to raise a child together from the start." She eyed the blonde who nodded absentminded.
"Where is this suddenly coming from?" the brunette questioned softly.
"I overheard people talk in the lab." Maura admitted slowly. "About how people above 40 shouldn't get any children." Jane mulled over the words in silence. It was untypical for Maura to let such thing insecure her. Therefore, she assumed that there must have been something else.
"Yeah, people talk all the time about things they have no clue of. So what?" Jane stated shrugging.
"Constance wrote me a text." Ahhhh why hadn't she thought of that. Whenever Constance made contact it shattered the blonde into pieces and made her doubt herself and her life. Jane tried not to roll her eyes and stay calm.
"Oh Maura." Jane whispered when she saw tears dwelling up in the hazel eyes she loved so much. "Come here." She opened her arms and Maura moved into them burying her face in the brunette's neck.
While Jane was wondering whether to ask about what Constance had wanted from her or not, Maura lifted her head and told her that her adoptive mother had written that she was about to make a new testament and she needed some dates from Sophie.
"But the thing that hurts me most is, that she doesn't even consider Julia as her grandchild. She is my child too. This is so unfair!" Maura almost yelled the last words in anger while tears were rolling down her cheek at the same time.
"Oh boy." Jane muttered. She was surprised at herself, that she wasn't angry at Constance about not asking about Julia even though she knew that Maura had adopted her. What made her mad was that she hurt Maura so much.
"So, you called her?" Jane assumed when all pieces of the puzzle fell in place. A feeling she loved so much about her work.
"Yes, and I told her that we were having a baby."
"Oh boy." Jane muttered again. "Just forget it, Maur! Its not worth wasting your time on being mad. This is Constance. She always has been this way and maybe will be like this forever. Its unfair, yes! I agree with you totally. But being mad or sad doesn't change anything. We have everything we need: a loving family, great kids, a job we like, a home. Focus on what's good and on what you or we have achieved."
"She said, we're crazy to have another child at our age. How can you stay so calm?"
"Oh Jesus. Stop yelling, Maur. You will wake up the kids. I stay calm because I'm happy. We don't need the money. And you won't be able to change her. Its her opinion. Okay. Everybody has a right to his own opinion. But that doesn't mean that she's right. I wouldn't exactly classify her as expert when it comes to parenting. I know how much you long to be loved from her. Maybe she loves you in her own weird and twisted way. But you can't force her to change."
"Its easy to talk for you. Your mother turned 180 degrees and became a respecting person. She has always loved you, even if sometimes it had been too much, but still…." Maura now stated angry, pushing herself away from Jane. The brunette knew that this wasn't meant mean or so. This was just what Constance did to Maura.
"I love you, Maur." She said with a sad smile. "Come on. I know you hurt, and I know that it's easy for me to talk. But be honest. You wouldn't say any different thing if it were the other way round. So, please Maur, try to stay with me. don't hide in your little snail house. Don't let Constance do that to you. I.. the kids… this family needs you."
Maura was silent for a very long time. Jane thought that she had already lost her to the downward spiral she usually fell into at such occasions.
The blonde finally cleared her throat and Jane sighed in relieve when the blonde moved back into her arms without further fights. "I love you." She whispered again. "I love you too, Jane and you're right. I would have said the same to you. Because this is the truth."
"Are you fighting?" a small, scared voice announced the presence of Sophie who pushed herself into the room through the door.
"No, honey. We're fine. Do you want to join us and cuddle a bit?" Jane softly said.
"But mum is crying." Sophie anxiously replied while crawling into their bed to snuggle up against Jane.
"Also adults cry sometimes, you know. Things happen that make us sad or angry. And then we yell or cry. And sometimes its good. But the most important thing is to talk about what's bothering you."
She watched as Sophie caressed over the tears on Maura's cheek. Her movements were gentle. "Its okay mum. Don't be so sad." She whispered over Jane. It hit the brunette how sensitive their kids were and how they found the right words or ways to cheer them up as Maura's tears finally subsided.
God, I love this family so much Jane thought kissing the girl's forehead and then Maura's. "I think I go back to bed." Sophie yawned after a while. Jane watched her slip out of the bed and disappear into the hallway and sighed.