Chapter 3: Memories

I charged through the cabin door hard, breaking the lock and a hinge in the process. Running over to the couch, I set Alex down as gently as I could. He had fallen asleep buried in my shoulder during the sprint here, which was still wet with tears and rain. I was coated in his blood, which was dripping on the floor. I hastily prepared the resin-bandage for application.

Extending my inner mouth, I let a dark, viscous drool drip from my jaws onto my hands as I morphed it into thick strips and chunks. I placed a chunk of it onto the palm of his right hand first to act as an anchor for the main part of the bandage. It was still wet and weak, but over time, it would dry and harden over his hand. I quickly made another strip and attached it to the original strip of resin, which I wrapped around the back of his hand, covering the small exit wound, as well as the much larger entry wound. Once that was done, I proceeded to take Alex's set of second skin off. I lifted him up gently and grabbed the gray skin, which was still wet with blood. Throwing it randomly, I went after his other layer. After a futile moment to take it off of him properly, I made a clean slice down the middle with a single claw, effectively cutting it in half and allowing me to peel it off of him. My breath hitched at the sight.

After I dispatched his second skin, I was able to see his chest. Aside from the four large lines going diagonally down his chest, he had a million and one old, pink lines going across the majority of his upper body. Specifically parts that would be hidden under his second skin. Some were small, some were much bigger. Many of them seemed darker, while others seemed to be lighter. The two that sticked out was a large vertical line on his right stomach that seemed like it was from some kind of deep wound, as well as a deep depression in his right forearm.

He… He is covered in scars… By the Queen-Mother, what has Alex gone through? I thought. His scars reminded me of mine, and I realized that, though we were different species from entirely different planets, we were not that different ourselves. A pang of sadness struck me as I thought on what life had done to him, but I didn't let that distract me as I formed the long strands of resin.

As carefully as I could, I applied the strands of thick and sticky resin to his chest, which I had to carefully wrap around his entire body. My carefulness was rewarded with Alex's uninterrupted sleep. I drew out a long hiss as I looked over my lower body, seeing crimson red drip off of me. I looked at his gray second skin on the ground near the couch, and saw that it was also an unnatural red. I suppose this is the least I can do for now, I thought.

After checking if all of the exits and entrances were secure, I grabbed Alex's second skin and made my way outside. The sun was rising, but it was well hidden behind the storm clouds for now. A bolt of lightning struck somewhere, and a loud crack was heard a few seconds later. I winced at the loud noise, but allowed myself to relax in the heavy and cold rain beating down my body. It felt nice, and as the blood drifted off of my body and onto the grass, I tried to wring the blood out of the second skin. It didn't completely come out, but it was now a pink instead of a dark red. I walked back to the cabin, dripping wet with water, not blood, and made sure to wring as much water as I could out of the skin.

What is the point to this second skin? I thought as I walked. I highly doubt it serves as armor with how easily it was broken… Is it to conceal his scars? Does it even serve a purpose? Maybe-

Everything grinded to a halt when I noticed a large black figure hunched over Alex's sleeping body. I growled and snarled savagely, immediately getting into an offensive stance and, knowing that he was likely a part of my hive, I yelled, "Get away from him!"

He turned around and looked at me. My assumption was correct, he was from my hive. "Relax, suckling, I am not here to harm him, or you," He said.

"Why are you here, Dante? How did you even find me?" I demanded.

"I found you because you never masked your scent, which was careless. However, that is not the point. The point is, I am here because I need to warn you," He said. Any other brother or sister here and I would have killed them on the spot. However, Dante never contributed to the torture that they forced upon me, but he never stopped it either. He was a bystander, and while I could not fault him for ensuring his own life by not helping me, I couldn't help but be furious at him for the same reason. I hissed at him again.

"Warn us of what? We know we have a few cycles before The Queen sends her forces after us."

"No, you do not," He said.

"What? How long do we have then?"

He sighed. "The Queen found out about what you did, and she is not happy at all. That scout you killed back there was going to be a praetorian, so now The Queen is furious. You have until sunset of the next cycle, and by then, you need to be gone forever."

I pointed at Alex. "What about him?"

"Everyone knows that you linked with him, so if he is not gone by then either, then The Queen has ordered for his harvesting. She has special plans for him if he is not gone." I felt my heart sink. He was stuck with me forever now, that just sealed it. I gave another hiss.

"Why are you doing this? Why now of all times?" I questioned. He looked down for a few seconds, and then back up at me.

"Because… I want to see you leave this place and never come back. You deserve that much, and I will try to help you as much as I can with that. You and him." He pointed to Alex.

"I… thank you. Thank you for your assistance and your information, this will help us immensely. If there is any way I can repay you-" I was cut off as he began to walk towards the busted door.

"All I ask for is that the two of you survive." And then he was gone. I sighed, and walked back towards the couch.

Lifting up Alex's head, I sat down on the couch and laid his head onto my lap as I began to purr and brush his long, brown fur. He was no longer losing blood, and the resin should help accelerate the healing. I looked over his sleeping body, looking at all of the scars and blood smeared across him. It amazed me just how many there were, and I realized that I probably didn't look any better. I looked over his face next, and saw that his eyes were red and his entire face was soaking wet from tears and the rain.

He shivered and shook a little, and I realized that the purpose of these second skins was to regulate their body temperature. Noting how one of his skins was destroyed, and the other was soaking wet, I began to create another blanket.

Everything was warm, and everything hurt.

Remembering a similar feeling long ago, I sat up quickly to inspect myself for wet blood and injuries, but instantly regretted it as sharp pain clawing raked across my chest. I winced slightly, and found that the same stuff on my shoulder was now covering my chest and hand, as well as the slimy, organic blanket laying on my lap. A long, dark, six-fingered hand wrapped around my left shoulder.

"Calm down," I heard Xerxes say in my head. My head pounded with every heartbeat, but his talking seemed to pierce that, and help to melt the pain away. "You're safe."

I groaned slightly, remembering everything that had happened, and carefully fell backwards onto Xerxes lap. He began to brush my hair and purr, which slightly weirded me out, but oddly calmed me down too. Goosebumps raced down my body from the cold, and I realized that my shirt and jacket were missing. I became anxious at this and started to wonder when he would ask the million dollar question. I wrapped the blanket tighter around me. "Where are we?" I asked.

"Back at the cabin," He said. "How are you feeling?"

"Better than earlier, that's for sure," I said. I remembered the pain, and I remembered seeing Frank. The asshole's dead, it's over. Calm down, I told myself. I repeated this a few more times, until I was brought out of my trance.

"As I was treating you earlier, I saw your body," He said.

"Yeah?" I said. Please don't bring it up, I thought. Thinking about how I got all of my marks made my stomach churn. I really wanted to tell him, but the words continuously disappeared before I could say them. I sat up, trying to form a plan on how to deal with this.

"Okay, take as long as you need. If you are not ready, I will not push you." Wha - Oh, yeah, telepathy and all that. Shit.

"Sorry, I forgot you can hear my thoughts," I mumbled sheepishly. The dirt and grime on my shoes suddenly became interesting as I said, "I just.. I don't have it in me to discuss that. The memories it brings up aren't even memories, they're nightmares." I jumped a little when I felt Xerxes arms and tail drag me towards him and wrap around me when I finished speaking.

"Calm down, Alex. It is fine."

"Thanks," I sniffled. I awkwardly wrapped my arms around him and rested my head against his chest, which made him purr. Everything about the moment was really nice, and I felt myself relax into it. However, it didn't take long for me to realize that I was still shirtless and in a tight hug with an alien. I broke away from him and nervously rubbed the back of my neck. I did a quick glance around and spotted my jacket, along with what remained of my bloody shirt on the floor away from the couch.

"I'm… gonna go put my jacket on." I walked over and picked it up. It was obvious that he washed it, as it was wrinkled and damp, not soaking wet, as well as their being considerably less blood on it compared to the remnants of my shirt, which was absolutely covered in it. I put on the jacket. "Dude, thanks. You didn't have to do this."

"I have a debt to you now, for what I have done. I know it is not much, but it is a start I suppose," He said. My confusion showed, because he continued saying, "I have put your life at extreme risk by contacting you. My actions nearly got you killed a couple of hours ago, and I feel terrible for it. I hate myself for what I have done, and I would not blame you if you did, too." He was pacing as he said this, but I put my hand up to stop him.

"...I can't hate you," I said.

"What?" He was genuinely shocked. "But you have nearly died due to my actions! Linking to you nearly stopped your heart! And one of my kind almost killed you! Now, you will have to leave this place forever because my association with you will make you a target for my kind!" He exclaimed. Everything he said was laced with powerful emotion, and it slightly reminded me of myself with everything that he said. "And despite all of that, how can you not hate me?"

"I mean, okay, the last, what? Five hours? They've been weird and slightly painful, in more ways than one, but I mean... I can't hate you for something that I've done." I sighed. He was the confused one now. "Earlier, you asked who Tony was. I said we were friends and that now he's gone… dead." My voice was already cracking and my resolve was breaking. I took a deep breath. It helped, but only slightly. "I'm the one that got him killed. I needed someone, anyone or I was going to fucking lose it. I tried for so long to latch onto the thought that I was going to survive no matter what, but I just couldn't survive on sheer willpower for that long alone…" Tears were sliding down my cheeks, and I was barely able to choke back my sobs. I looked him in the face.

"…I didn't want to die, Xerxes," I choked out. He was shocked, I could feel it radiate off of him for a moment. It subsided, and he launched himself at me and wrapped me in a tight hug. I finally stopped holding back and latched onto him desperately, barely even registering the throb in my shoulder and chest. I sobbed into his chest as he rubbed my back. "I didn't and don't want to die! I-I didn't want Tony to die! I loved him a-and wanted to be with him! But I killed him! I-I got him killed when all I wanted was to be happy…" He tightened his grip on me and squeezed me closer.

"It is okay. You are not going to die, Alex, not while I am here. I promise you that I will stay true to my word and protect you for as long as I live. And you did not kill Tony. His death is not on you."

I sniffed. "But it is! I dragged him into my mess and Frank killed him! I got him killed when I should've just left him be! Everyone knew the rumors of Frank, and yet I still let Tony be with me when we both knew the risks!" I was pissed at myself.

"Listen to me, Alex. You loved him and he loved you, right?"

The seemingly random question caught me off guard, and I said, "Y-yeah.. He did, and so did I."

"If you loved each other, then you would have protected and died for each other. He died protecting you so that you could live, and I do not doubt for a second that if the roles were swapped, you would have died for him as well. Do not blame his death on yourself, blame it on the actual monster that did this - Frank."

My heart hurt from all of the memories that came back. I remembered waking up in the basement of this very cabin, tied down to a chair with Tony across the room from me. I remembered him breaking out of his restraints and working on mine, until two shots rang out, and he collapsed. Frank walked past his body and began saying something to me, but I didn't hear a single word. He had destroyed my one chance at freedom from this Hell I lived in. He started to hit me, over and over again. He knocked my chair over and continued wailing on me, damn near beating me to death, until Tony somehow got up and tackled him. With the chair damaged from the fall and the restraints being loosened earlier, I was able to get up. Armed with a broken chair leg, I managed to bat his gun across the room before he could shoot me.

My head drifted downwards, but came back up with tears going down my face and my teeth grinding. I breathed in sharply and felt rage flow through me. "We fought tooth-and-nail to survive, and we got so goddamn close!" I quietly screamed through clenched teeth. "We almost - almost! - killed my father, if you can even call the bastard that, before he killed us, but that he made sure that Tony died and I suffered just a little more before he did." The rage was gone, and I only felt weak and tired and sad now.

"He was your… father?" Xerxes questioned. I felt him tighten his grip on me even more. "And your scars… By the Queen-Mother. Alex… You have a powerful soul, and an incredible will to live. You refused to give up in the face of death itself, and you survived."

I sighed. "Even as he stood over me, ready to beat me to death, I still fought and kicked and screamed as loud as I could. I don't even know how I'm alive. I feel like I should've died. He shot and stabbed me that day, but I refused to give up and die, no matter the pain, no matter the cost. The police came, and for the split second that he was distracted, I managed to stick a knife in his throat and knock him off of me. But somehow, he survived even that for a few more seconds, because he almost finished me off if it weren't for the police shooting him dozens of times to finally drop him. It was like he wasn't even human."

Xerxes never replied, so we just stood there in each other's embrace. No birds or animals were heard, only the distant thundering and heavy rain were present. This was something that I could easily get used to. I snuggled into it even more. This, however, was put to a stop when my watch started to beep all of a sudden, telling me that it was time to get up for school. I reluctantly got out of his arms and shut the alarm off. I didn't bother resetting it.

Damn, I really didn't think about that, did I? I'm gonna have to drop out. That actually blows on some kind of level, because even though I honestly couldn't give less of a shit about the people there and even some of the teachers, I still wanted to leave this town with a highschool diploma. I guess I'll just grab my stuff and leave.

Come to think of it, I have quite a few things I need to do. I need to get us some money, a location we can go to after this, I need to go cut loose ends with the boss… too much stuff, not enough time. Speaking of which-

"Alex? Hello? Are you there?" Xerxes said, shaking me out of my trance.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm just… lost in my thoughts, y'know?" He gave me a mental affirmative. I recollected my thoughts and said, "Uhm, how much time do we have before we need to be gone?" I heard him sigh.

"One of my kind came in earlier while you were asleep. He claims we have until sundown tomorrow."

"I thought we had longer. It was because of what we did back at Jackson's, wasn't it?"

"Yeah… I am afraid so," He said.

"Well, that heavily cuts us down on time," I said. "Sundown tomorrow ain't until eight-ish, so we have a little while." I rubbed the back of my neck. "Hey, so I need to go for a little bit and get some things settled. You wanna crash at my house while I'm gone? Nobody'll be there all day except you and me when I come back, plus, it should keep you safer than you are here." I glanced towards the front door and saw that the stopper for it was missing, the door itself was leaning awkwardly, and there was a large dent in the thing that somehow didn't split the door in two.

"Are you afraid that the security of my small hive is not adequate enough?" He teased.

"Call it a hunch," I said as I made my way out the door, meeting the cold rain for the millionth time today. I heard rapid footsteps, and turned to see him run out the front door and slide to a stop in the mud. I began to walk through the trees and along the path towards home, Xerxes footfalls right behind me.

I limped through the woods, grabbing onto dead logs and trees in an attempt to keep myself on my feet. I could barely see with how dark it was, and the tears in my eyes didn't help. My right hand brushed against a tree, and I noticed that I could barely feel it. Frank must've damaged the nerves in my arm when he shot it, I thought. I continued to move, refusing to stop and die. I barely made it five feet before my foot tripped on something and sent me to the ground.

I screamed in agony as I barely caught myself with my left hand, my right hand clutching onto my stomach and around the handle of the kitchen knife that just went a little bit deeper into my guts. I screamed so inhumanly loud that it deafened the thundering rain. The pain that I was already feeling, coupled with this new agony and Tony's death made me so sick to the stomach that I didn't realize what was happening until my screaming was muffled by my violent retching. I couldn't even tell how long I was on my hands and knees, puking and crying in the mud and rain. All I knew was that I wanted the pain to be gone and for some way for this hell to end. I couldn't stop thinking whether or not death was better than this, but I refused to give up, not when the finish line was so close.

The rain was getting harder, and I was getting weaker. I shakily got up, my mouth opening and closing, wanting to scream in pain but unable to. My legs hurt and shook violently, my stomach ached and burned, I was freezing cold in the pouring rain, and I was covered in mud and blood that was not entirely my own. I started walking, every step a new agony that aggravated the knife in my gut.

"Just keep moving. Just keep moving. Don't stop to look back, just keep moving," I grunted repeatedly. I continued to move through the dark woods, shutting my brain off and only moving, repeating the mantra over and over again. I couldn't even tell how long I was walking for, I just knew that I had to keep walking until I found some resonance of civilization. A stick snapped behind me and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up, but I refused to stop and turn around. I noticed a familiar building in the distance, and I felt a surge of renewed hope and adrenaline. I limped as fast as I could toward the back door.

I'm going to make it! I thought…

My thanks goes to Incurser, who Beta-Read this for me.