Boom. I did it lmao.

For Janelle, my very dear friend and one of the nicest, funniest, and all around wonderful people ever, who I wanted to do something nice for on their special day ;3 and so I hope this will do! ^^

Happy birthday (again), love! I hope your day is a fantastic one! ;)

*4.1.21: retyped edited to fix mistakes, update writing style, and add to the story.*

Part IX

Once the would-be blood sacrifices were all seen to — captives like many of the others Kagome had saved and just as eager to return home — it was then that Hawke and her friends offered to accompany her back to Kirkwall.

To which she accepted without hesitation. A good thing too, for fatigued as she was and sorely lacking arrows for her primary weapon, she was in no condition to be making the trip back alone.

There was also the slight issue that Kagome wasn't entirely confident she even knew the way back. She had relied on the two slave hunters she first encountered in Kirkwall to find the holding caves and paid attention to little else on the way over, but that was not something she was about to admit out loud.

The thought had Kagome worrying, though — about Fenris returning to the city on his own, especially as it was nearly dusk. One of the main reasons Hawke had suggested traveling together in the first place was due to the Tal-Vashoth that stalked the coast, lying in wait to pick off unsuspecting travelers.

But the woman herself assured Kagome that Fenris had only been roughed up a little before the fight with Hadriana and not seriously injured at all — thanks largely to the fact that someone had done half the work of clearing out the caves for them before they'd even arrived.

"Pretty gutsy, that, charging in alone," Varric remarked when the subject came up while making their way down the coast. His tone was neutral, but Kagome could pick out an undercurrent of something, though she couldn't quite discern what — likely because Varric himself couldn't decide whether it was impressive or downright stupid.

Kagome snorted, her gaze turning to the darkening sky. "I don't know if you can call taking them down while their backs were turned gutsy, exactly." Her actions were little different from that of an assassin, and the comparison was something she wasn't sure how to feel about it. Either way, it didn't sit well with her.

"They were slavers, sweet thing," Isabela was quick to rebuff, though her tone was gentle and kind, "They didn't deserve fair."

That was true enough. Killing wasn't something Kagome enjoyed. It would never be for as long as she lived, that was for sure, and was reserved for only when she could find no other option — but…

Being sacrificed to fuel one's power was not a fate any of those captured inside those caves deserved. She didn't, couldn't regret stepping inside those caves and saving those she could. She only wished she could've saved more .

"Still, pretty stupid though," Kagome admitted with a murmur. She gave a rueful, half-smile and laughed, the reality of what she pulled finally hitting her, " Gods , I can't believe I did that either."

Shippo would absolutely throttle her if he ever found out, and if Kagome could help it? He never would.

"Well, you'll fit right in then!" Hawke chimed in, bright and chipper as she laughed along, "We make a lot of stupid decisions around here and yet still manage to scrape by!"

"Oh?" Kagome said with another laugh and a shake of her head, "Nice to know I'm in good company, then!"

Fenris, you've certainly found yourself some interesting friends…

Later on, as they were finally approaching the city, Kagome found herself staring at the gates leading into Kirkwall's Hightown.

And behind those very gates, Fenris waited. It still felt so… so surreal .

And she had so many questions too! Fenris had lingered here long enough to find allies — to make friends . How long has he lived here? What of Danarius and his hunters?

Kagome's heart swelled with wonder and sheer relief — had Fenris found himself a home?

To think, the man she had spent years beside traveling, who once could not stand to remain in one place for little more than a couple of weeks, had changed so much.

The thought then had Kagome faltering, as well as her steps. When Hawke glanced over her shoulder, concern plain across her face, Kagome offered a small smile and a shake of her head.

Fenris had changed, yes. That much was clear. But he had also grown. And though Kagome found herself saddened that she was unable to witness it for herself, she was still so happy for him, so proud .

It only… it only made her wonder, what else had changed while they were separated? And she hated it for how apprehensive it made her to find out.

The world was a blur the moment Fenris pushed through the door, his feet leading him — away, anywhere but there, where bodies littered the room, Hadriana's cast amidst them all and the mess he made spilling out onto the tile where the eyes of his companions, of Kagome , watched him like some beast about ready to snap at any moment and turn on them.

He knew immediately that such a thought was wrong. They were… his friends. They've known him long enough to know his temper, to know that it burned hot, and to be wary of it would only be natural lest they get burned by it too.

Still , a venomous part of his mind hissed, nothing like this. They did nothing to be deserving of this.

For a fear of his, a deep-seated one that he himself would rather not admit to, much less even think of, was one day turning to find them staring back in fear.

So he ran. It was what he did best, after all — all he had done for the last better half of a decade. Running from Danarius; running from the hunters the magister had sent after him to fetch him, like some lost pet; running from his shame and his weaknesses.

Running from his actions back in those caves; from the shocking news dropped upon him — a sister , still his mind could not even grasp such a concept; from Kagome , who was alive after all those years thinking her dead and by his fault; from his racing mind and the million of questions and thoughts consuming him...

The growing monster churning in his chest, threatening to explode from the inside because of all these world-shifting events, was only par the norm. So much had happened in such little time, and time… time was what he needed to just — process . To think . Without the pressure of anyone watching him, waiting, and with expectations at that.

How much time he had exactly allowed for his feet to drift on their own, Fenris did now know. But by the time he found himself standing before Kirkwall's gates, the sun had long already set, and so, for the most part, did the monster inside his chest.

He had killed Hadriana.

Her death was not something he was about to cry over, certainly not. But it was not something he had meant to do either — no matter just how good it felt, the relief from the knowledge that she could neither taunt him nor haunt him any longer, as well as, admittedly, to execute the deed himself.

However, he did have every intention of letting her go. Yet, he didn't. He couldn't. He had looked Hadriana in the eye and given his word — and killed her, anyway. Not because of some conscious choice he'd made to deceive her, but because, for just a split second, he could not control himself .

And that , that lack of control, tore at Fenris inside — for it made him realize that he was still a slave, that he always had been. His shackles had only changed hands from Danarius to the ghosts of his own past and rage.

He also had a sister .

That is, if Hadriana could be believed — and a small part of him couldn't help but do so, despite his better judgment.

He had a sister who he could not remember, did not even know if she remembered him in turn, if she knew of him or whether he was alive, or even what she looked like. But he had a sister all the same, and she was not a slave — a fact that made something in his chest settle in peace. Relief .

And he now knew where she was.

A larger part still warned him it was a trap — bait that Danarius had intended to dangle and tempt him with in order to draw him out, but… he could have it looked into. And if this Varania was who Hadriana claimed her to be…

If this woman was his sister …

Fenris felt something bubble in his chest. He absently lifted a hand to rub against his chest plate above the spot. It took a painful moment to recognize what it was — hope — and he let his hand slide away to fall at his side, eyes shutting against the noise of his gauntlet scraping against the metal.

His mind rebelled against the bittersweet feeling immediately, past experiences warning him against it. His life had never taken kindly to hope, it fervently reminded him, and often only turned out to give nothing but disappointment and grief in return.

Yet… Fenris could not help but allow it. He wanted . Maker , he realized, how much he wanted… A sister meant so many things — a link to his past, answers, so many answers , and most of all, family .

And he could not help but think that, perhaps, hope was not always fated to end in empty returns.

After all, there was her — one thing he had never once dared to hope for, not after that day , knowing, believing , it to be a fool's hope that would only end in pain.

And yet…

When he burst into that room to find her there, kneeling on the floor, covered in dirt and blood and her teeth bared in a snarl, determination and defiance ablaze in her eyes — watching as her face went slack with shock as he was sure his own did the same, before her gaze finally, finally , locked with his-

For that one, single moment, Fenris had forgotten all about Hadriana, all about his fury and his thirst for the witch's blood. Instead, he was filled with an abundance of… elation .

To find Kagome in those caves, breathing and whole and fighting , to hear the melody of her voice again, to feel the warmth of her back pressed against him like so long ago, of her touch , her fingers , brushing against his skin… It was beyond even his wildest dreams and most desperate of wishes.

Kagome was…

Alive.

Kagome was alive and Fenris breathed and he wanted to just laugh.

So he did .

A broken sound escaped his throat, rough and raw and disbelieving as his eyes began to sting. An idle thought then crossed his mind — that if anyone saw him then, back bowed and arms wrapped loosely around his abdomen and shoulders shaking with halting jolts, they might think him mad.

It was fine, however, because Kagome was alive , and that fact alone felt so liberating that Fenris couldn't find it within himself to care if even a cutpurse came up to him right then and relieved him of what little coin he carried.

Kagome was alive .

Fenris's laughter faded, as swift as it came.

And… And… he thought to his growing horror, eyes snapping over to the city gates to stare in stricken disbelief, I left .

Fenris moved , his feet taking flight in a brisk pace as if he were a man possessed.

Kagome was alive. He saw her standing there before his very own two eyes, solid and real , and she had come after Hadriana — for him .

And he left.

For years he believed her dead, and the moment he found out it wasn't so, he had left .

Fenris's steps hastened further.

The Hanged Man was the type of establishment where no questions were asked and happily so, and Kagome very much appreciated the fact.

As soon as they stepped foot into Kirkwall, the hood of Kagome's cloak — now in sore need of mending and a few good washes, if it was even salvageable — was pulled back up to conceal her identity. Walking into the tavern batted no eyes and garnered only a couple of the briefest of curious looks as they headed straight for Varric's suite. Even the barmaid wasn't fazed when she asked for Kagome's order, giving her the same tired smile she gave everyone else at the table before moving on.

After taking Varric's offer to clean up a bit, Kagome returned to the room to find Norah, the barmaid, already setting out bowls of stew in front of the others. Despite how utterly exhausted she felt, she found herself to be even hungrier, her stomach releasing an angry growl loud enough for the others to hear and cause a pause in their conversation.

Varric's snort and Hawke and Isabela's collective snickers had Kagome ducking her head, hiding further under the edge of her hood — Norah, at least, was kind enough to keep her reaction to a mild twitch of her mouth.

Kagome dug into her meal with gusto as soon as her bottom hit the chair, talking and getting to know the others in between bites to fill the silence. It surprised her, the ease with which she slipped into conversation with the three. Maybe it was because she knew that Fenris, however much, trusted these people. Maybe it was the people themselves, Varric's natural charm, Hawke's lighthearted, amiable personality, and Isabela's endless supply of dirty jokes and suggestive comments that kept her words flowing. Maybe it was a mix of it all.

Kagome liked it here, she found herself deciding as she sat with the others still not even an hour later. Her head was thrown back along with her hood, forgotten as she laughed aloud while nursing a mug of what was the shittiest ale she'd ever tasted to date and not caring in the slightest.

Kagome was still laughing when she caught sight of something white, a flash of it just out of the corner of her eyes, and immediately she turned for a clearer look.

Her laughs faltered, softly trailing off.

Paces away in the doorway stood Fenris, watching her with an intensity that struck her deep in her soul. Suddenly, she could not help but be hyper-aware of how hard and how fast her heart was pounding in that very moment.

The others soon quieted upon her abrupt silence, turning to follow her mesmerized gaze. Fenris fidgeted beneath their collective stares but remained rooted to his spot, features lined with uncertainty. Though he did not yet step inside, nor did he appear about to make another escape; instead, Kagome caught the way his body made a little pitch forward before shifting back, like a tiny aborted lurch.

He was done running, it seemed, but unsure whether they would welcome his presence after how he had left things.

Grinning softly to herself, Hawke was the first to move, giving Kagome an encouraging nudge.

Flushing a bit, Kagome broke out of her staring and pushed herself to her feet, unable to help her own trembling grin spreading across her own face. Nervousness bubbled in her stomach as she crossed over to the man waiting for her.

But washing over her nerves was the overwhelming sense of pure relief — Fenris was there before her very eyes, safe and free and whole. Before she knew it, Kagome found tears building in her eyes and she quickened her stride once there were only a few feet remaining between them, closing the distance and throwing her arms around Fenris's neck.

Kagome all but yanked him flush against her, laughing at the brief grunt of shock it elicited, uncaring how the metal of his chest plate collided against her, grazing against her collarbone. She only wrapped her arms around him tighter, inhaling deeply and giving a shuddering breath when she breathed in his familiar scent — one she missed so dearly , for so long.

Stunned, Fenris stood there and allowed her, frozen in her embrace. In the distance, out of the corner of his eyes, he saw his friends similarly rendered speechless and gaping at them.

"It's been so long ," Kagome choked out against his ear, her voice overwrought with such heavy emotion that he could not even begin to decipher, " I've been so worried ." Tears began to color her words.

The shock melted away from Fenris as he relaxed in Kagome's arms. Slowly, with hands that he hated to admit were trembling, he returned her embrace. They glided slowly across the width of her back, one curling around the curve of her waist, while the other slid up to cup the back of her neck, his fingers threading through her curls. Burying his nose into the crown of hair, Fenris breathed her in with a shaky murmur of her name.

Kagome pulled away, leaning back as her arms slid down from around his neck so that she could cup his jaw — could sweep the arch of his ears with her thumbs. Fenris's eyes fluttered beneath her touch and she watched as his lips did a lazy curl into a small, content grin. Warmth bubbled in her chest, had her breathing out a watery laugh in turn, and she pressed her forehead against Fenris's and smiled, blissful and serene.

It was a long moment before either of them moved, content to bask in the other's touch, in their presence. Kagome was the one to pull away once more, just enough so she could stare up at him. She swept his fringe out from under his hooded eyes, another laugh pulling from her throat.

It was a rueful sound this time around.

"I thought I'd never…" Kagome trailed off, lips quivering as she really took him in, the deep lines between his furrowed brows, the dark circles beneath his eyes, the exhaustion and turmoil lying inside them. "Oh, Fenris… Are you okay?"

"I… I am better, now." A surge of emotion crashed over Fenris, powerful and threatening to overwhelm him — immediately he pulled Kagome back towards him, pressing her close against his chest once again. Head bowed, face buried into her hair, his entire body quaked. "I believed — I believed you dead ," he exhaled on a rough breath, words hoarse. "You were dead," he keened, because for the last few years, to him — she was .

Fingers curled against his shoulder blades momentarily, trembling before they straightened, drawing small, soothing circles. Fenris shivered to feel the tips of her digits skating across the skin and spine left bared by the open strip running down the back of his tunic.

"The explosion knocked me unconscious," Kagome whispered into his chest, his ears barely able to catch the muffled words. "Fell into a ravine from the blast, hidden under by some bushes. When I came out… hunters or bandits or whatever they were, were scavenging everything left in the clearing."

Fenris swallowed thickly, his stomach swooping uncomfortably. "You were there?" he exhaled, his voice small and breaking, "The entire time, you were there?"

He caught the sound of a sniffle even under the cacophony of the inn, Kagome burying her face further into his pauldron. "I tried looking for you, tracking you… I'm not sure how long I was out because I couldn't-" She broke off with a shudder, before suddenly pushing against his chest to look back up at him, fingers curling over the collar of his chest plate, clinging to it with a white-knuckled grip. Her watery blue eyes trembled as she implored, mouth parting with another shuddering breath, "Fenris, I'm so sorry ."

"It isn't your fault." The words escaped past Fenris's lips automatically, but he sounded bereft.

He couldn't even begin to comprehend what she told him — she was there , alive, the whole time .

And he had abandoned her.

Kagome was already shaking her head, reading the conflict playing out across his face with ease. "It wasn't yours either," she insisted.

Still, he did not look like he believed it — believed her .

For nearly three years he had thought… If only he had waited , all that time believing her to be dead, that it had all been because of him…

... It could have been spent together, instead.

"Where are you staying?" Fenris rasped out, abruptly clearing his throat. Fingers glided to pause at the bend of her elbow, and Kagome found herself having to resist leaning into the touch fully and bask in it — not here, not so obviously in front of the others.

Though they were kind enough to engage in their own quiet conversation so as to give them some semblance of privacy, she could still feel the occasional glance against the back of her head. She'd rather not give them more of a show than they already had, if she could help it, and was sure Fenris would feel much the same.

"Here," Kagome replied, stepping away and breaking from their embrace, if only just. She lingered close, near enough to almost touch with only a sliver of space between them. "Isabela was telling me it's safe enough if I keep my hood up and head down out there," she said, glancing over her shoulder at said pirate, "That the people here aren't usually the type to, ah, pry. Common courtesy and such."

Fenris scoffed, the sound full of disdain. "Unless there's coin to open their mouth," he muttered.

A snort from behind had them turning to find Varric with one eyebrow raised and obviously listening in on them, just as Kagome thought. "Or coin to keep them shut," he murmured almost idly. At Kagome's confused look, Varric offered an amiable smile. "I really wouldn't worry too much about it, Firefly."

But Kagome's confusion only furthered. She turned to Fenris, searching for clarification.

Fenris rubbed a hand over the back of his neck, a grudging quirk to the corner of his mouth. "Varric has… connections."

"For shame, Serah!" the man himself interjected immediately, "I am but an entrepreneur with a penchant for storytelling!"

A quiet snort passed from Fenris. With a flat look slated at his companion, he drawled a response, "Whose dealings more or less involve the Coterie, among other, less savory organizations."

Varric huffed, looking obstinately offended. "I won't stand for such slander!" he exclaimed, slapping a hand against his stone table. The very same hand shot out to punch Hawke in the shoulder when she sniggered something under her breath.

"Well, it isn't as if you've much to stand on in any case."

Hawke took the hit with a wry, shameless grin that had Varric shaking his head in feigned disgust. "And here I considered you my most trusted, best friend."

"But I still love you the most!" Hawke fawned dramatically, winding her arms around Varric's broad shoulders, "Doesn't that count for something? "

Pointedly turning his head away, Varric gave an imperious sniff. "At this moment, no." Still, even he couldn't hide the faint curl of his mouth at Hawke's theatrical gasp of dismay.

Snorting into her drink, Isabela rolled her eyes with a fond grin. "Would you two like a moment of privacy?"

Immediately Hawke released Varric to vehemently protest that her love for him was entirely different that what they had, only for Isabela to laugh it off with breezy ease.

"Oh, darling goose… I believe we both know whose name you were shouting in my ear last night."

Hawke and Varric sputtered, the former from embarrassment and the latter from amusement. Kagome turned back to Fenris with a grin — one that faltered upon seeing the look on his face. She swallowed lightly, stunned.

Though the corners of his mouth curved only slightly to make a faint, small smile, there was a lightness to his face that… Kagome honestly could never recall seeing before. The hunters snapping at their heels had haunted every second of their time traveling together — it allowed no welcome to carefree moments such as these. A single second of recklessness could lead to tragedy.

It nearly did, anyway.

"Kagome?"

Fenris's soft rasp startled her — she jerked a little, eyes flying up to meet his curious gaze from where it had fallen to his shoulder. "This place has done you some good," she couldn't help but murmur. The corner of her mouth lifted. "Or the people, rather."

Kagome was only barely able to catch the faint flush rising to further darken his cheeks before he turned away with an irritated grumble.

"Well shit, who knew the elf could blush!" Varric's laugh echoed from across the room. The three at the table had quieted down, their attention now back on the pair by the door. "It's a fine look on you, Broody. Makes you look more… approachable." When Fenris gave a low growl and a flinty glare, Varric only laughed more. "Y'know, as opposed to that ."

Kagome tried not to laugh as well, she really did. Still, she failed. "Broody?" she murmured, profusely delighted as her gaze flickered to the man in question, watching as his own eyes rolled up to the ceiling. "Firefly?"

"Makes it easier to tell all you tall people apart," Varric explained with a wink.

"Fenris refused to tell me his name when we first met," she confessed, not at all perturbed by the exasperated noise it drew from her friend. "He only told me when I threatened to call him 'Grumpy'."

Fenris bore their resulting sniggering with surprising goodwill, even as Varric shot him a meaningful look from the corner of his eyes as he told Kagome, "I like you, Firefly. I think I speak for us all — and one in particular — when I say we'd be more than happy to see you sticking around for a while."

"Speaking of," Fenris interjected before Varric could go on further, sending his friend another dark glare before pointedly clearing his throat. "The crew of the ship you sailed here with. They have yet to leave, yes?"

It took Kagome a moment to compose herself before she could give a coherent answer. Even so, her lips were twitching once she did, "I doubt they'd do all the repairs in one afternoon."

"Well, with that and resupplying whatever was lost, I'd give them at least a week before they're in good sailing capability," Isabela chimed in. Her bracelets gave a rattle as she set her mug on the table and leaned back in her chair. "And that's being generous — the harbormaster is a tight arse. Could take two if he's in a mood; three if they happen to piss him off."

Fenris issued a nod, as if that decided it. "Then it's risky for you to stay here. Doubtful they'd keep to the docks for that long, and they'd certainly be drawn to a place like this."

Hawke's expression turned positively impish, "You've another place in mind, Fenris?"

It was the first time since Fenris had stepped into the room that Hawke addressed him directly — his determination faltered. "I… I do," he said, voice softened. His eyes flickered over to Kagome, unsure now, "If it is alright with you, of course."

Kagome wasn't quite sure what he had in mind, but she trusted Fenris and that was enough for her. Nodding, she agreed, "I'll just grab my things and tell Corff I won't be needing that room after all."

"We'll leave whenever you're finished," Fenris replied, his own nod coming along slow. His gaze then drifted towards Hawke, where the mage was now leaning forward against the table, elbows propped and chin perched atop her clasped hands, watching them with quiet curiosity. Fenris sounded uncharacteristically demurring as he then asked, "But first… if I may have a word, Hawke?"

Grey eyes blinked at him before Hawke nodded. "Mind if we borrow your room for a moment, 'Bela?"

"You're welcomed to it." The pirate herself climbed to her feet, strolling on towards the door. "I'll head up to the bar with you, sweetness," she said to Kagome, before looking over her shoulder. "Need another drink, Varric?"

"I'd love one, Rivaini."

Whatever Fenris had to say to Hawke, the two looked better for it despite how drained they appeared after the conversation.

By the time they came back, talking to one another in soft, companionable murmurs, it was clear that Fenris was at least more comfortable around Hawke and less guilty. Hawke too seemed more relaxed as she gently nudged shoulders with him as they walked back into Varric's suite, where they found the other three of their collective friends laughing wildly around the rims of their drinks.

"Hawke!" Isabela shouted upon noticing them enter, bronze eyes dancing bright, "And Fenris! We were just talking about you two!"

"Oh?" the mage murmured, amused, while Fenris stiffened beside her. "Do tell! Only good things I hope."

"Trading stories, really," Varric said with a low chuckle, "Firefly's got some interesting tales to share."

"Oh, joy," Fenris immediately deadpanned.

"Nothing embarrassing!" Kagome said in her defense, quickly holding up her hands in surrender. She swayed slightly as she did so, her gaze possessing a suspicious glaze to them.

Accusation mingled with the exasperation already on Fenris's face. "I'd be far more inclined to believe you, were you not currently drunk ."

"Tipsy!" Kagome protested, "I'm tipsy ."

A chorus of snorts echoed around the room, signaling just how many of them believed her: none.

Kagome huffed as she crossed her arms and turned her head away. There was a flush to her cheeks, but that could be attributed as much as to the ale as it could to her embarrassment.

Fenris only shook his head, eyes shut and lips pursed, struggling to contain his laugh.

"Okay, so I… might be a little drunk," she admitted, bashful.

"Is that so?" Finally, Fenris gave a soft laugh under his breath before suggesting, "Then perhaps we should go?" When Kagome clambered to her feet with another full-bodied sway, he crossed the room in a brisk stride, a hand held out for her to take and steady herself with.

Giving him a grateful look, Kagome grabbed onto him, swooping down to collect her bag and pulling her hood back over her head once more before letting him lead her out of the suite. After bidding their goodnights and farewells, Kagome giving the three each an enthusiastic wave goodbye and a, "Nice to meet you!", the pair was gone from the room.

Silence followed, the noise from the inn downstairs becoming muffled once they'd shut the door. It was a long moment before Isabela's snorting snickers shattered it. "Oh boy, what I would pay to be a fly on that wall," she remarked, a shit-eating grin plastered across her face. "She's just gonna love the welcoming mat in his foyer, I know it."

Varric snorted, leaning back into his chair with a shake of his head. "I'm just wondering how far Broody thought through before deciding to be a gentleman and offer Firefly the sanctuary of his humble abode." At the raised eyebrows he garnered from both his friends, he grinned a grin to match Isabela's own. "It's been how many years since he took the place? A few years now? The only decent bed, never mind room, in the whole damn place is his ." Varric scooped up his mug and took a swig of his ale, swallowing before he chuckled into his drink. "When do you think he's gonna realize?"

"Oh!" Hawke's eyes went wide for a beat before she sputtered out a laugh, sinking into her chair. "Oh, poor Fenris!"

Isabela slapped the table, shaking with mirth, "Hey, maybe that was his plan all along!" she crowed.

"Pft!" Varric laughed out, "I don't know if Broody's that slick." His laughs eventually faded as a pensive look took hold of his face. "Besides," he murmured, softer now, "You see the way he is around her?"

Isabela hummed. She leaned forward, planting an elbow on the table and resting her chin in the dip of her palm. "Like a different person," she agreed, murmuring. Her golden eyes drifted to the side in contemplation, a dark brow furrowing. "Less… spiky, that's for sure."

Varric snorted but didn't disagree.

Hawke peered between her two friends. Mug cupped between her two hands, she traced an idle finger along its rim and asked, "So, what's the verdict?"

Sobering, Varric gave a thoughtful hum. "She's a friendly one. Nice. Genuinely so. I'd say not a mean bone in her body, but, well. We all saw her earlier today."

Isabela scoffed out a soft "hah!", a wry twist to her lips. "She was ready to rip that witch apart with her own bare hands!"

"Speaking of hands," Varric murmured, cocking an eyebrow at Hawke, "You didn't happen to find out anything else about her…" he trailed off with a telling wiggle of his short fingers. "I admit, even I'm curious what that's about."

"Diving right into, 'so, you're not a Templar, but you're not a mage, either…?' would be coming on a tad strong, no?" Hawke mused, lifting a shoulder to shrug it off. "Clearly she's not a Templar or she wouldn't be so paranoid about hiding from them, so that's good enough for me, really. And Fenris obviously trusts her."

"You didn't ask him?" Isabela wondered, languidly tipping her head in her lover's direction so she could look over at her. "While the two of you were chatting?"

Hawke shook her head.

"Everything alright there?" Varric cautiously asked when it was clear she wasn't about to expand further on the subject herself.

"Perfectly peachy," she quipped, and then downed the remains of her drink. Sliding the back of her hand across her mouth to wipe away any lingering drops, Hawke sat back and allowed the corner of her mouth to curve into a small smile.

The trip from the Hanged Man to Fenris's place was a peaceful one, much to the surprise of the man himself, and a sobering one for Kagome. The fresh air did much to clear her mind — not that she said so aloud, wanting to enjoy the warmth of Fenris's touch at the base of her spine as he led her out of Lowtown and through Hightown, keeping her close while also keeping both an eye and ear out for any signs of an ambush.

"There's almost always someone hiding in the shadows," he informed her under his breath. "We — Hawke and the others — did away with some of the major gangs last year, but it seems that only cleared the way for another to take their place in time."

It had Kagome checking for her daggers, just in case.

But they made it to his home in one piece with no blood needing to spill, thankfully, and soon enough Fenris was letting her into one of the estates making up Hightown.

"Well," Kagome announced in a measuring tone once they were inside, staring. She saw it the moment she stepped foot inside — a corpse propped up by a spear in the entryway, and by the looks of it and the state of its decomposition, it had been there for a long while.

Fenris had already explained the circumstances through which he acquired the place, and that it was through his acquaintance with the city's Guard-Captain that he was able to keep it.

What he had seemed to skip was the part where she wouldn't be his only guest.

"Your… decorative tastes leave much to be desired, but, I can certainly see the appeal."

Fenris snorted, casting a look at her from over his shoulder as he led them through the estate's vestibule.

"It'll ward off the most squeamish of intruders that might dare to encroach on your self-claimed home!" she teased, to which Fenris chuckled. Truly, though, Kagome couldn't say it surprised her — not any longer, at least.

She was at first upon learning that he lived in Hightown — living among nobility sounded like the opposite of what he'd prefer, after all. But it all made sense once Fenris mentioned that the place was once Danarius's until he killed the slave hunters and demons that once occupied the building and essentially staked it as his own.

Letting the estate fall into disrepair, making it undesirable and unlivable and therefore unsellable, was just another slap in Danarius's face on top of taking it in the first place.

What was a surprise was just how many of the damn corpses he left lying around the place, something she discovered personally as they were crossing the room towards the stairs. She was busy eyeing the rather large, gaping hole in the ceiling and through the roof — slight against Danarius or not, the resulting damp and mold was a health hazard — when her boot caught the edge of a broken tile and she stumbled, grunting as she fell.

Whatever she landed on certainly wasn't the floor; it was too soft for that, and floors did not give under pressure.

Nor did it have the unique aroma of decay that assaulted her nose and made her eyes instantly tear.

Her valiant struggle against the urge to retch at the stench alone was hard enough before she opened her eyes and also had to swallow back a yelp at the empty-eyed skill staring blankly at her in return. Kagome snapped her eyes shut and clenched them tight, trying to force it all — the smell, the image, the texture of its rough, shriveled, waxy skin against hers — from her mind as a strangled whimper worked its way out from her throat.

Steps away, Fenris froze at the sound of the collision, foot suspended in mid-air as he winced. But the second he heard her dismay, he pivoted and crossed over with swift strides, plucking Kagome up with ease and setting her down on solid ground, with him standing between her and the corpse she had the close encounter with.

As soon as she wrangled her tumultuous stomach into control, Kagome opened her eyes and shot him an icy glare.

Fenris swallowed lightly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I… I will clear some of these up a bit tomorrow," he offered in recompense.

" Some? "

Kagome's voice cracked.

Fenris turned his head, avoiding her gaze and answering further. His hands remained where they were, however, gripping tight at the dips of her waist — a fact he himself realized a beat slower than Kagome.

Abruptly, he released her, pointedly clearing his throat. "The rooms are, uh, just up the stairs," he muttered under his breath, so low Kagome strained to hear him, and pivoted once more on his heel to make way for the staircase.

Kagome followed after him silently, grimacing when their path crossed with yet another corpse, and nearly walked into Fenris's back when he reeled to a stop at the top of the landing.

She watched as he fidgeted in his spot, head turning between the middle and left doors. After a long moment, Kagome gave into the urge to have mercy on him. "Is everything alright?"

Fenris went still. She caught sight of the dark, olive green of his gaze as it flickered over to her from the corner of his eyes. "Ah, it's just…" He trailed off, shoulders dropping as he let out a disappointed sigh. "The other room has a bed, only… It has been over a year since I last stepped foot inside. I doubt it, or the room itself even, is in the best of conditions…"

Though she was only barely able to detect it, there was a note of something in his voice — whether it was embarrassment or shame, however, she couldn't be sure. Either way, Kagome stepped forward. "Fenris, it's alright," she said, giving him a smile as she reached out to gently touch his shoulder, wanting to reassure him. "Renting a room at the Hanged Man, for one night at least, should be safe enough."

"No," Fenris insisted, speaking before he truly gave it any thought if the brief surprise flickering over his face was any indication, and his sudden objection had Kagome stopping short. "I…" A frustrated sigh hissed through his teeth as he clenched his hands at his sides.

Kagome wasn't sure what to think — a part of her wondered, hoped even, that like her he didn't want her to leave. Nearly three years they'd been separated. Almost three years she had grieved, and wondered, and hoped, and wished that…

A couple of hours spent fighting and drinking among his friends, after all that time… It just wasn't enough.

Especially when they had yet to have even a single moment truly to themselves; especially when so much had yet to be said, and she could feel it hanging over them even now, in the slight tension and awkwardness the lingered in the air between them, standing out profoundly in the moments where silence had fallen.

She didn't want to assume, however — didn't want to set herself up for disappointment. She accomplished what she had set out to do: she found Fenris, both alive and well and still free from the clutches of his former master, though the magister still had yet to give up.

Anything else, anything more …

Kagome could only wish and wait and see.

"I am sorry, Kagome," Fenris then whispered, solemn and mournful. Eyes widening, she looked back up to find him staring back at her with somber eyes that left her heart twisting. "I… I confess, I was not thinking when I offered to host you. I merely wanted…" He stopped himself there, gaze falling to the floor, and did not finish the thought.

Kagome found herself also wishing he did. She wondered what it was — that he wanted — and answered him with a confession of her own.

"I'm glad you did."

Fenris's eyes rose slowly to meet hers, so warm and with such intensity, the shiver that it sent racing down the length of her spine was like a jolt of lightning — alive and wild and leaving tingles in its wake to thrum throughout her limbs.

Clearing her throat, Kagome ducked her head, rolling her shoulders before trying for a disarming smile. "We've spent many nights in close quarters-" She caught the way Fenris raised an eyebrow at that , hastily adding, "-During our travels. I don't mind sharing a room if you don't?"

His gaze softened, gaining a teasing gleam. "So bold," he murmured, lips quirking into a grin, "But then, you always did enjoy the company."

Fenris moved then, breezing by to make his way to the middle door and leaving Kagome to sputter after him. He opened the door, beckoning her inside with the grin still on his face.

Huffing, Kagome stepped inside with a roll of her eyes, ignoring the soft laughter he gave under his breath as she passed. Fenris followed her in, shutting the door behind him, and crossed the room to feed the dying blaze in the fireplace while Kagome took a moment to look around.

The room was in better shape than the rest of the estate: tidier, cleaner. Broken tile still spanned the floor, and the walls were peeling, and she could even spy cobwebs compiling in the corners, but it was clearly lived in.

Kagome could see that Fenris made little more effort than to ensure he wasn't sleeping and living in filth itself. The bed was made with clean, if threadbare, sheets. The table by the wall was clear of grime and dust, only a bowl holding a few pieces of various fruits and a couple of cups set upon its surface. A bottle of wine sat half-filled on one end of the worn bench facing the fireplace.

She could also see that Fenris made little effort in making the sole room he occupied, his . If he hadn't already told her, there was no way she'd know that he'd spent over the last couple of years living here for it certainly didn't look like it, void of personalization of any kind.

"It isn't much," Fenris began, but Kagome gave into the need to stop him right there.

"Do you remember that time," she wondered aloud, spinning on the heels of her feet to face him. Tipping her head, she tapped her chin, "I think it was just a few months after we first met — the barn we had to take shelter in, to escape a nasty storm?"

Visibly uncertain where she was going with this, Fenris gave a wary nod.

" That was a shithole," Kagome bluntly said, grinning wide, "What with the wind, everything creaked. I swear, I thought it was going to come down on top of us. Couldn't catch a wink of rest that night!"

"The roof here leaks," Fenris flatly replied in turn, realizing what she was doing.

"And I'm sure that's easily fixed with some boards and a few nails," Kagome breezily countered. "Fenris," she said evenly, smiling gently now, "It's okay ."

A hush fell between them — another awkward one, which Kagome couldn't begrudge. Where does one even begin once past the initial reunion after over two years of the other believing you to be dead?

She was still figuring that one out.

"I'm tired," Kagome finally said in the end, breaking the silence. Because she was, and as much as she desired to talk to Fenris, as much as there needed to be said, perhaps it would come more easily after a night's worth of rest for them both. Peering at Fenris, she watched as he fidgeted but nonetheless looked a bit relieved. "I know we've got… a million things to talk about, but maybe…"

"Of course," Fenris softly murmured, clearly understanding. "Would you…?" He trailed off, stiffly gesturing to the bed, his other hand already rubbing at the back of his neck.

It made Kagome smile — had warmth filling her chest, heart full and fuzzy with fondness for the man standing awkwardly in front of her. "I've got my bedroll," she gently declined, "But thank you. It'll be easier to fall asleep in something familiar."

Kagome could not sleep.

Silence reigned between the two as she listened to the surrounding sounds, having long forgone any attempt to sleep — past the crackling of the fire burning to her left, she could catch a skittering noise below; outside, scratching, the low howl of the wind skating through the cracks of windows too old to shut and seal out completely; the faint jingle of armor of passing guard on patrol.

And despite how utterly exhausted Kagome felt, sleep still refused to come. She wondered if Fenris was faring the same struggle.

Minutes or seconds ticked on by, before Kagome decided to test the waters.

"... Fenris?" she gently called out, a cautious probe. No answer followed, but she managed to catch the telltale hitch of his breath that signaled he'd heard.

It didn't matter, as long as she knew he was listening.

Kagome shifted in her bedroll, pressing her face further into her pillow, and curled inward as a soft sigh escaped past her lips. There was one thing that had been eating at her, ever since that moment at the Hanged Man. She had wanted to wait until the moment, for when they talked, but it seemed that it couldn't.

"I just wanted to say… I'm sorry, Fenris."

I'm sorry for leaving you alone; sorry for the pain I caused; sorry that for the last couple of years you've carried the weight of my death on your shoulders.

I'm sorry for not finding you sooner.

Unbeknownst to her, where he laid in his bed tensed beneath his sheets, Fenris's eyes clenched further shut — a drop of water escaping from the corner of each eye. Eventually, he let out a shuddering breath he wasn't aware he had been holding and suddenly sat up, sheets pooling at his waist.

"Kagome."

The woman in question jerked at his voice, strong and clear if not for the hoarse crack in the middle. She snapped her eyes open, found his green ones gleaming in the dark, gazing straight at her.

Kagome waited, breath caught, heart speeding inside her chest.

Fenris's eyes fluttered shut, his head bowing forward, strands of soft white hair falling into his face and blocking her view. When he finally spoke, his voice had dropped to a vulnerable whisper. He did not wave off her apology, did not deny or argue against or accept it; instead, he reciprocated with one of his own.

"... I am sorry, as well."

Slowly, Kagome's fist curled into her blanket, pressing it firmly to her chest, a smile spreading across her face. She paid Fenris the same favor, and neither waved the apology off nor accepted it.

"There's just… one thing I fail to understand," Fenris went on to murmur in that same soft voice, "All this time you were alive — why have you not returned to your home by now? Was that not your desire, to find a way back?"

Why look for me?

But Kagome only smiled at him and simply said, "It was at one point, but… I decided to stay."

Fenris stilled. "What of your son?" he asked, the words a hushed whisper lingering in the space between them.

Kagome couldn't help the laugh that escaped her. Sitting up as well, she shrugged off her blanket and said, "Well, turns out that going home mattered little to either of us in the end. We both found a reason worth staying for. His was a woman he met during his own time searching, Morrigan…"

Looking down, Kagome smoothed her blanket out over her lap, her smile widening. "Besides," she murmured, "As I said before, this world isn't so bad. And the ritual wasn't really worth the risk — it was only by chance that we ended up here, after all, and without that jewel of mine and its power, who knows where I could end up if I went through it again."

Finally glancing up, she caught Fenris's stare and held it firmly as she told him, genuine and with sincerity, "I'd much rather stay here."

"I…" Fenris trailed off, speechless.

Kagome went on. "I was planning on returning to Tevinter, to track down Danarius just in case he did catch you at some point, or if not, then to follow any lead he had on where you were, when I overheard those slave hunters talking about a rather terrifying elf wanted by a magister and his apprentice." Her mouth twitched, the corners of her eyes crinkling as she shrugged. "I couldn't help but come."

Fenris fell silent after that and did not speak for a long moment. He only stared back at her with that intense, unwavering gaze of his, burning with an emotion Kagome would need a lifetime to decipher.

It was a surprise, then, when Fenris threw back his sheets and swung his legs over the edge of his bed with no warning, climbing to his feet and crossing the distance between them.

Startled, Kagome was only barely able to shift onto her knees before he was already there, crouching beside her on one knee and a palm pressed firm against the floor right beside her outer thigh.

"You've said this before," Fenris breathed out, and Kagome went still as she felt the warmth of it wash over her face, her own breath hitching. She couldn't tear her mind away from his sudden proximity, couldn't tear it away from the fact that his arm was just barely brushing against her own or that it was bare much the same as hers and giving off a delicious heat that drew her towards it like a moth to a flame.

Mostly, really, Kagome couldn't take her mind off the fact that Fenris was all but pressed against her and also shirtless, and so the only thing she found herself able to do was swallow thickly and mumble out an unintelligent, "What?"

"You came for me."

The statement sounded more like a declaration now in the quiet of the room, and the raw emotion in those four short words rendered Kagome speechless this time around.

"Kagome," Fenris rasped out, shaken and profoundly affected, "What does that… How else am I supposed to take that than…?" He shook his head sharply, frustrated or desperate, she couldn't tell — and neither could Fenris, truthfully — and when he looked back up at her, his eyes were ablaze with something wild as they locked with her and Kagome-

Kagome leaned forward, and paused, and found herself hoping .

Fenris's eyes flickered about her face, taking in her furrowed eyebrows; her widened eyes with their blown out pupils; the teeth digging deep into the tender flesh of her bottom lip; and felt his stare linger there, felt a pull in the base of his belly that tugged at him towards her direction before he managed to drag his gaze back up to meet hers once more.

"Fenris…"

He found his answer in the way his name fell from her lips, breathless and wanting.

Fenris gave a short growl, a curse in his native tongue — damn it all — and close what little distance remained between them.

Kagome melted — into his touch, into his embrace, against his mouth. Her blood felt like liquid fire in her veins. His touch, his lips — the match that set it to flame.

Though it may had only been a handful of seconds, it felt like eternity had passed before he finally, slowly, pulled away, both of them gasping heavily. Kagome tried chasing him back, wanting more, needing more, but Fenris hovered just out of her reach, his voice deep, rough, and throaty as he murmured, lips still so close they brushed faintly against her own with every word.

"So much was happening at once," Fenris whispered, "I feel…" He trailed off with a thick swallow, suddenly overcome, "That I did not give you the greeting you rightly deserved, not after all this time had passed, not with how we parted. I want…"

But the words would not, could not, come. And part of him… was grateful for it, too. It was — too soon, he thought. But at the same time, he could not help but feel this was a long time coming. He wanted — so much, so very much, but he did not wish to ruin what they had when he'd only just gotten her back. Not with how his mind was still a mess as it was, too much so to make sense of what he felt, and there was still much that needed sorted.

All Fenris knew was that he wanted…

You, so much. Your heart, your lips, your everything, anything you are willing to offer, stay, please stay, never go again…

And that frightened him as much as it thrilled him, which only served to frighten him further.

Coward , his mind accused, and he found himself agreeing without a shred of protest.

"Yes…?"

Fenris looked back up, felt as his breath became stolen once more as he caught Kagome's expression. A glazed look had clouded her eyes, her lips parted and swollen from their kiss , and in the shadows cast from the fire roaring behind her, he could spy the barest glimpse of the flush in the cheeks he still had cradled between his palms.

He had done that.

Him.

Fenris felt that pull again, the desire to give in one more time.

And so he leaned forward, pressed his forehead against Kagome's, watched as her eyes shut with a flutter of her lashes, and allowed his own to do the same.

A wave of content, of peace , settled firmly within his chest.

"Hello again, Kagome."

And Fenris smiled as her breathless laughter danced in the quiet of his room.

Sooo. This story is p much done, just the epilogue remaining I believe! I've thought about continuing it, but the plot is p. much resolved – Kagome and Fenris are together once again!

But, but, but!

There definitely and most certainly will be a sequel! It'll follow along the rest of events of Act 2 of the game, and possibly Act 3 (which is also why I want to stop this fic here), but mostly focus on Kagome and Fenris face the reality of entering a romantic relationship with one another and making it work, all the while surviving the oncoming shitstorm(s) that go down in Kirkwall and other complications that come between them.

(I'm still working on the summary.)

Since the last chapter, a bunch of stuff has been added to the fic's tag on tumblr! Most notably, daoxlor (previously beautiful-phantom on tumblr, but still under the same name here) and kagomes-lover both created some amazing fenkag art! Both heavily featuring some hugging~ lmao. And I also used what I wrote in response to daoxlor's art in this chapter as well!

Find them in my directory page, or just go through the ttlg tag. Any questions, feel free to ask!

Until next time, guys!