Hey, everyone! It's me, spucubed. The second part of my Mario Is Missing review will be published later than expected. In the meantime, I've prepared a little trailer for you. Please enjoy!

The following trailer has been rated SEE, for Shouldn't Even Exist.

We begin with a stretch of road in a rural countryside. On the side of the road, we see a police car, with a Waddle Dee sitting inside. For the sake of the argument, we'll call him Wade L. D. for the rest of the trailer. Anyways, as Wade is doing what all policemen do best- sitting around and doing nothing- a multi-colored blur passes by the police car. The blur is recorded by the radar gun, which reads 760 mph (this is about 1223.1 kph, for those of you who don't live in America). Astonished, Wade taps on the radar gun, thinking that it is malfunctioning. However, even after that single, not very hard tap, the gun still reads 760 mph.

"What the…" Wade mutters, completely dumbfounded by what had just happened.

Wade exits the vehicle and finds a clipping of film where the blur had passed by. He picks it up, wondering why it was here, what it was for, and most importantly, where he should go for lunch.

spucubed Productions presents...

...A Magical Friends Media project...

The blur for earlier is now zipping and zooming through a forest. To the blur, everything is a blur. It jumps down into a hole and bounces off a beanbag placed perfectly underneath the hole. It walks by a shelf full of books, movies, and video games, with a copy of Detective Pikachu facing the camera.

A gloved hand reaches out and presses the play button on a boombox. Amish Paradise by "Weird Al" Yankovic begins to play (and will continue to play for the rest of the trailer).

As the song begins, an onion-like figure with red boots, disembodied gloved hands, and a witch's hat is seen standing on the road from earlier. She stretches for a bit before grabbing a roll of film and pulling out a broomstick. She climbs onto the broomstick, her lips curled into a Dreamworks Grin as her tuft of onion hair flutters in the breeze.

"Gotta go fast" -Sonic the Hedgehog

She does indeed go fast; her hat would have almost immediately blown off her head had she not been grabbing onto it. As she pulls out her phone and turns it on, she breaks the sound barrier, and most of the United States lights up.

A short time later, a meeting is being held within the Pentagon, headed by Meta Knight.

"Twenty minutes ago," he began, "an anonymous Internet reviewer has set out to destroy the Sonic the Hedgehog movie. This requires someone who can figure out exactly what we're dealing with."

"You're not suggesting who I think you're suggesting…" said one of the generals (played by Adeleine), who looks incredibly concerned at this point.

"We have no choice." Meta Knight nodded gravely.

Later, at an unidentified military base, a large transport truck rolls in. The truck stops, and a ramp extends out from the doorway. The ramp quicky changes into stairs, and the door opens, revealing a short, round, purple figure with a jester's hat, a red bow-tie, wooden clogs, and no arms to speak of.

Susie stares impassively at the figure and mutters, "What the…"

"Are you in charge here?" the figure asks.

"Yes, I am-"

"Nope!" he interrupts.

"My m-"

"Wrong!"

"I-"

"I'm in charge! Allow me to clarify."

The figure jerks his body like a robot, then he starts spewing out words too quickly for anyone to comprehend.

"In a sequentially-ranked hierarchy based on level of critical importance, the disparity between us is too vast to quantify," he says, then turns to the spider-like figure beside him. "Agent Taranza?"

The figure steps to the side and Taranza says, "Marx thinks you're basic."

Susie scowls at this weird duo and says, "Listen, sir, I don't know if you realize who-"

"I'm sorry, ma'am, what was your name?" Marx asks, leaning forward.

"Susie-"

"Nobody cares!" Marx shouts.

Coming in 2020

Wade bursts into an abandoned shack carrying a flashlight and a loaded tranquilizer gun.

"FBI! Open up!" he shouts.

The flashlight beam lands on Gryll.

"Uhh…" Gryll says nervously, trying to figure out what to do,before shruggings and saying, "What's up?"

Wade screams in terror, and Gryll screams back. Wade fires a tranquilizer dart, which lands in Gryll's left foot.

"Saw that coming... " Gryll moans before passing out.

Wade and Gryll are driving in Wade's police car, with Gryll, still holding on to the roll of film, sitting in the passenger's seat.

"Okay, onion girl," Wade said sternly, "I want answers."

Gryll shrugs and says, "Well, it's kinda hard to explain, but long story short, I'm gonna have to save the world. Nothing special."

A giant robotic vehicle is driving towards Wade's police car. From a hatch in the front, it launches a harpoon that lands directly in between Wade and Gryll. Not even a second later, Gryll jumps out of the car, flies toward the vehicle on her broom, and rams right into it, toppling it over.

The impact causes Gryll to fly back into the car. "Ha ha! Is that all you got?" she says haughtily.

In the vehicle's control room, Marx smiles and says, "No, but thank you for asking." (By the way, how can he control the thing if he doesn't have hands?)

Marx presses a button (somehow), and a hatch at the back of the vehicle deploys a repurposed Robobot Armor. As the robot speeds forward, Gryll watches from the back of Wade's car.

All she could say is, "Uh-oh."

Marx observes a clipping of film. Taranza is standing right beside him. Marx looks at the film in wonder as he says, "Whoever this critic is, it is our job to capture them, neutralize them, and protect this film."

Suddenly, the clipping wraps around Marx's "neck," suffocating him.

From the creator of Magolor's Coffeehouse...

Wade and Magolor are falling from an incredible height. Gryll throws a Star Stacker block, which turns into a portal (because of course it can do that). Wade and Magolor fall through the portal and land beside Gryll.

Every critic...

Gryll flies away from weaponized drones. Gripping the roll of film as tight as she can, she is able to dodge all of the drones' missiles.

...Insert Witty Line Here

Gryll, Wade, and Magolor are standing on the roof of a building, completely surrounded by drones. Marx looks on through an aircraft, and makes a sinister smile. He presses a button (you know what, let's just say he has hands like in the manga), and all of the drones fire missiles at them at the same time. Time seems to stop entirely for Gryll, as she taps her foot and looks directly at the camera.

"What?" she shrugs. "We had to spend our special effects money on something."

Gryll turns all the missiles in the direction of Marx's aircraft. She grabs a few missiles and connects them to some of the drones, causing them to explode.

Gryll Reviews: Sonic the Hedgehog (2019)

Gryll zips herself up into Wade's bag with a concerned look on her face.

"Just stay in there and be quiet," Wade urged as he and Magolor walk ahead.

Wade and Magolor walk up to an elevator. A Cappy and a Chilly approach as well.

"Are we almost there? It's hard to breathe in here." Gryll said, loud enough for the people aside of Magolor and Wade to hear.

"Is your child in that bag?" asked the Cappy, sporting an arched eyebrow.

"No," Wade said quickly, before catching himself. "Well, I mean, yes, there's a child in here, but it's not mine."

"So that's not your child?" said the Chilly.

The Cappy and Chilly awkwardly sidestepped away, probably to call the police or something.

"It smells like the shag carpeting in my deadbeat uncle's house," Gryll complained. "And believe me, that stuff is nasty."

March 2020

The screen glitches and shows Marx, now in his Soul form, preparing to fire a laser.

"Hey, everyone!" said Magolor, now sitting in his reviewing chair. "It's me, Magolor!"

"And I'm Gryll!" said Gryll, sitting next to him.

"I hope you're excited for Gryll's upcoming review for the Sonic the Hedgehog movie!" Magolor beamed. "It probably wasn't a good idea to announce it 8 months early, but we gotta get the word out somehow."

"But enough about that, Magolor. Let's hear your big news."

"Alright, Gryll, since you insist. Last Friday, Magolor's Coffeehouse has been inducted into the League of Fannon Critics!"

Suddenly, balloons and confetti came raining down, and "Laugh! Be Happy! (NTSC Version) - MOTHER 3" by SiIvaGunner began playing.

"Oh cool," Gryll replied. I just have one question: What is the League of Fannon Critics?"

"I'm glad you asked!" Magolor said, still excited. "The League of Fannon Critics is a community of Fanfiction reviewers. It was created by , creator of the story Spike the Snob. The league features many big names in Fanfiction criticism, especially the renowned Keldeo the Critic."

"I just wanted to let you know this do you could show these guys as much love as you give me, since we are basically one big Fanfiction family now. But I won't let this distract me from the fact that I have my own reviews to do. Speaking of which, the second part of my Mario is Missing review will be out next week."

"Well, that's all for now. Magolor out!"