Jane Bennet did not often allow herself to indulge in melancholic thoughts. She sought the best in every person and situation. What good could she contribute, afterall, if her own spirits needed rescuing? So when she first learned that her beloved sister had come to harm, she turned her distressed feelings into care for others. She comforted her worried aunt and uncle, expressed her gratitude to everyone she encountered, and sought to raise Charlotte's expectations of a speedy recovery for Elizabeth. Her resolve to stay optimistic, to trust in Lizzy's resilience, had faltered only twice: once when Jane first laid eyes on her sister, and now, three days after the fall, as she sat in an ornate little bedroom, clutching that dear sister's hand and praying. Had she not been so distressed, and had Charlotte not been occupied with preventing Mr. Collins from performing some ritual, one or the other of them might have noticed their first tangible reason for hope. Elizabeth had been motionless, bed covers undisturbed, these last few days, but now there was some variation. Her body was not so corpse-like, her surroundings not so still.
As it was, Jane had not detected signs of her sister's recovery, so when Elizabeth jerked awake with a shriek, Jane responded in kind. The following commotion was a blur for all involved. More unguarded expressions of shock, delight, and confusion abounded as Charlotte, Mr. Collins, Lady Catherine, Maria, Mrs. Worthington, a sizeable portion of the Rosings staff, and even, for a moment, Anne de Bourgh, flurried in and out of Rosings' smallest guest room. Prayers, orders, unsolicited advice, and unanswerable questions suffused in such excess that Elizabeth developed a searing headache. She even considered, but for Jane and Charlotte decided against, pretending to fall unconscious again.
Elizabeth waded through enthusiastic recollections of the last three days. Mrs. Worthington had thought Elizabeth would be dead each time she entered the chamber; Mr. Collins assured everyone that his righteousness and prayer had been to Elizabeth's benefit; Lady Catherine insisted she always knew there was nothing to worry about, the fall was not so serious and not worth the fuss; and dear Maria exclaimed breathlessly that nothing so exciting had ever happened in the course of her life. Just when Elizabeth began to wonder how much longer she could stay afloat, Dr. Horton was announced.
Not a moment after the room cleared, Elizabeth decided she liked this doctor. He crinkled his eyes when he smiled and spoke in a low voice which soothed her aching head. Gently, he told her that he would answer any questions, she must be quite disoriented.
Should she behave as she had last night when she first awoke? She was not sure she could handle the performance of confusion in her already confused state. Would the doctor notice that she knew to avoid use of her hurt wrist? Should she ask questions she knew the answers to if her reaction might give her away? The good doctor, sensing nervousness, eased her worries by assuring her that if she was uncomfortable or became tired during their interview, he could leave her to rest.
He started with what he thought would be easy. Could she remember what she had been doing right before she fell? Since "reading a scandalous letter from the man with whom I had tea at two in the morning" would not do, she simply provided that she had been reading a piece of correspondence and was distracted.
"It must have been a very engrossing letter."
"The first part of it was. I cannot speak to its ending." Dr. Horton laughed and commented about what a good sign it was that she had a sense of humor so soon after waking.
"You must be confused about what happened next."
"The others said I fell, hit my head, and have been unconscious since."
"Yes, you had a hard fall. How does your head feel now? Do you feel any dizziness? Lightheadedness?"
"Not at present, just a headache, but that too is lessening. I think it is worse with more noise."
"Well, the rancor I heard as I entered would be enough to give anyone a headache, even someone who did not suffer an injury."
Elizabeth laughed and relaxed again. From that point, the two conversed more openly about symptoms and recovery. So at ease was she, that Elizabeth even asked when she could expect to read again.
"Why could you not read now?" His curiosity was high, and she chastised herself for her blunder. She should not yet know this symptom. Frantically, she searched for an explanation, but the truth was all that came forward. She decided to tell a version of it.
"This morning when I awoke," after midnight was, technically, the morning, "before everyone came into the room, I tried to read the letter I had on me when I fell. As it was most recently on my mind, and as I had yet to finish it, I was curious about the ending. But I could not make anything out. There were just scribbles."
"Hmm. Blurred vision and light sensitivity are common symptoms of head trauma. Perhaps try a printed page though before abandoning hope. A handwritten missive will be less legible than a book. At present, I must ask that you rest. Even reading may be a strain today, though in the next few days it could prove an important amusement, as you will have to remain here for a while. I will visit you again this evening, and if anything significant changes through the course of the day, send any of the Rosings staff to call for me. Now, before I leave, are there any of the horde you would like me to admit? Or should I use my authority as your physician to forbid all from entering?"
"As tempting as the latter offer is, my sister and Mrs. Collins must have endured so much these last days, I would not force their absence at the moment when I might be a comfort to them. However, if you could insinuate to the rest of the house that more than two visitors at a time could damage my fragile constitution, I would be grateful."
At her pert look, the doctor laughed. "Fragile constitution indeed! Consider it done, Miss Bennet. And now, rest."
Rest had eluded Darcy, who awoke far later than his usual time, and far earlier than he would have liked, to the sound of his cousin banging on the door.
"Darce! For God's Sake, get up, man!"
Still woefully underslept, Darcy took a moment to remember all that occurred last night. The hallway. Elizabeth-alive and awake. Fainting, fighting, a hallway picnic, the letter, and at last her opinion of him remained. It was not a dream, was it?
"Open the bloody door! Darce!"
"Why is it always your intent to cut up my peace?" Darcy grumbled toward the door.
"Not to cut it, you layabout, to bestow it. Now come open the damn doo-Blazes, Darce, you look awful!"
"Good morning to you, too, cousin. Please, do come in." As usual, Richard absorbed none of Darcy's performed ill-will.
"Have you been unkind to Williams? Because truly, Darcy, you look like death."
"Do not pull Mr. Williams into this. This is how a man appears when he is brutally woken from sleep by his most annoying cousin."
"Ah, do not tease me, Darcy. Despite my best attempts for the title, your most annoying cousin remains my beef-witted brother. And besides, I would have been quieter if not for your stupid habit of locking bedroom doors."
"That stupid habit has saved me from more than one compromising situation, as you well know."
"Yes, and sadly has also spared your second-most-annoying cousin of any amusement at your expense."
"What is it you came to say, Richard?" Darcy was losing patience and gaining a headache at equal speed.
"Oh, yes! Darce, brace yourself. I came as soon as I heard that Miss Elizabeth woke this morning and seems in tolerably good health!"
It was not a dream! Darcy blinked at his cousin for a moment, remembering his own resolution to appear disinterested, then placidly remarked on the good news, sharing hope for the lady's continued health. Convinced as he was that Darcy was in love with Miss Elizabeth, (for what else could have caused such a transformation in his cousin?) this calm reaction did not make sense to Richard. He decided to put his theory to test.
"Yes, it is all very well. We hope for a speedy recovery so that this trouble may come to a close. Although, the whole sordid affair has had at least one positive outcome."
"And what is that, Richard?" Something about his cousin's tone set Darcy on edge.
"I think, at losing Miss Bennet's company for the past few days, and indeed having been confronted with the prospect of losing it forever, it has become more valuable, has it not?"
Darcy felt his face drain of what little color it had left. He tried to maintain an even keel. "It often happens that something becomes more precious when it is nearly lost. Do you remember when you lost your father's signet ring for a week, and then found it stowed in a sock? You never cared for the ring much before, but having feared it would never return, you wore it proudly. A few months later, you lost it again, I believe."
Richard smiled. He was striking a chord. "Darce, I am speaking of a woman! Not of some trifling ring! You paint me as flighty in that anecdote, but you know me to be steadfast when it counts."
Could Richard be implying that he had serious intentions towards Elizabeth? Before Darcy could form a response, Richard pressed his advantage.
"Such little scruples as her lack of connection or fortune seem rather immaterial now, when compared with her absence altogether, do you not think?"
Yes, of course they do. Darcy had trouble maintaining even breath. Richard was serious about Elizabeth. He was going to ask for her hand. Would she say yes? She certainly enjoyed Richard's company. She openly detested himself. He could have no hope for his own cause with her, but the thought of her with Richard… of having to watch her marry and have a family with another man, the best of men, his cousin who he loved like a brother, how could he feel about it?
"What are you saying, Richard?"
"You cannot mistake my meaning, cousin. I wish for Miss Elizabeth to become a member of our family."
There it was. Spoken plain as day. Darcy hated hearing this, he felt his body tense and reject the idea of them together, yet he had no rationalization for his protest except an unrequited love which could benefit no one. Of all the people in the world, here were two who he wanted to be most happy. She would be well taken care of, treated well, and Darcy would have cause to see her often enough. Perhaps, after enough years passed, they might form something like a friendship? Darcy tried to console himself to the idea.
For his part, Richard could only guess at the direction of his cousin's thoughts. He had expected some sort of outburst, a spark of jealous defense seemed more aligned with the Darcy he knew than what he perceived as calculated resignation. He decided to end the charade.
"I think she would make an excellent Mrs. Darcy."
"I-you-what? You are not in love with her?" Darcy felt immediate relief flood through him.
"No, but it is clear that you are, as much as you are fighting it."
"Richard, you know not of what you speak. What was the point of this performance?"
"To get you to admit your feelings, at least with me. In truth, I am disappointed in you, Darcy! I expected you to fight for a woman you loved- no- do not waste your breath denying it. I have never seen you so distraught as you were these past few days, and even before, this entire trip to Rosings you have been distracted, conflicted, I see now it was all because of Miss Bennet. I thought you hated her at first, but when you fought against our Aunt it became clear there was something more. You have been sly, I would not have suspected it of you. Everyone must fall in love once or twice before settling down, it was well enough your time. But tell me, cousin, is it serious? Do you really intend to make her an offer?"
Darcy knew not how to respond. Despite his teasing, he trusted Richard with his life, yet he had no desire to tell him the whole truth. Richard mistook his indecision and continued.
"Come, cousin, the heart wants what it wants! She is beneath you, to be sure. She would bring no connections or money to the family, but you have enough of each and are dependent on no one. You have all the luck of being an heir, what good is that if you do not get to marry where you like? Not all in our family will be so accepting, and it will bring some small scandal, but there is no real shame in caring for her. Believe me, if I were a first born, I would not be so cautious for the world about her."
"Enough! I can hear no more of this. I say again, Richard, you know not of what you speak. Miss Elizabeth Bennet is beneath neither of us. The boot is on the other foot. To the eyes of the Ton, in the most superficial ways you have described, she would be seen as inferior, that I grant you. I am ashamed to admit such arguments once dictated my behavior. In the essentials though, in her character and her person, Miss Elizabeth knows no equal."
"Ho, ho, Darce! There is the back bone I was looking for! So you do intend to make an offer! When can I wish you well? And what then was the point of pretending not to like her for so long?"
"You mistake me again, cousin. We may both rejoice at Miss Elizabeth's health, and that will be the beginning and end of our well wishes."
"Darcy, come now. You can confide in me. I want only what will result in your lasting happiness. Can you tell me that this does not involve Miss Bennet?"
"I cannot, but her happiness does not involve me." Darcy sighed at Richard's look of exasperation.
There was no escaping the inevitable, Richard would extract the truth somehow, so Darcy steeled himself and dove into the tale of his involvement with Miss Elizabeth Bennet. At first he gave only the barest account, but Richard, being a curious and supportive audience, soon uncovered the whole affair. The two gentlemen stayed in Darcy's room talking long after Williams came to restore his master's respectability, and might have continued throughout the day, had not the good man returned to announce the presence of callers.
"Miss Darcy, Mister Bingley, and Miss Bingley are in the front parlor, Master Darcy, and request your immediate presence. I should warn you that Mr. Bingley is rather upset and is causing something of a stir."
AN: Thank you to those who are sticking with this story or finding it for the first time. I am back from hiatus and should have regular updates going forward! Happy reading and stay safe out there!