Sorry to leave you all hanging with only half a date, but here I am, back today as promised with the second half.
I really like this chapter. I hope you do, too.
0
0
0
EPOV
When we hit the soft, warm, darkening air outside, Bella took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She wasn't unsteady, she didn't look like she would pass out. She didn't really need my arm around her, so I could probably let her go. I didn't.
I was a little glad to get out of that dark theater myself so I could clear my head. I mean, what the hell was that? The minute the lights went out I felt like I would crawl out of my skin if I couldn't touch her. I settled for holding her hand and rubbing her knuckles, but somehow that tiny innocent touch felt like some crazy hot sex act. I needed to get past this so I could behave myself. It certainly didn't help that she was wearing…the most un-fucking-believably hot slinky green dress tonight. It was like seeing every supple curve of her body slicked with shimmery green paint. And her hair, all curls and chaos. It begged for me to dig my fingers in and hold on tight. Goddamn Alice.
The valet approached us and I gave him our ticket to have the car brought around. As we waited I heard a beep letting me know I had a new text. I fished my phone out of my inside suit pocket. It was James. I'd been ducking him, and every other person I usually partied with, for weeks.
"Where the hell have you been? Are you coming out tonight? Heading to a party, hot girls."
I glanced at Bella. She was distracted, looking for something in her tiny handbag, so I texted back.
"I'm busy"
The answering ping came quickly.
"With Bella?"
Well, news of us was absolutely everywhere, Laurent was earning his paycheck making sure of that. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that James knew, too.
"Yes"
"Ditch her and come later. Or bring her along. Maybe she wouldn't mind if we shared"
He. Did. Not. Fucking. Say. That.
I closed my eyes tight and pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to contain the fucking murderous rage I was feeling towards James at the moment. If he so much as breathed in her direction, I think I might really have to kill him. How fucking dare he…?
But then again, in all of James' experience with me, when had any girl ever been different than that for me? Hell, that exact scenario had unfolded once or twice. Fuck. I felt sick. And dirty. And ashamed. She was way too fucking good for me.
I needed to answer. I typed out a response and snapped my phone closed.
"Fuck off."
That should do it.
I exhaled and dragged a hand through my hair, trying to at least appear calm.
"Well, what are you in the mood for? Any kind of food you want, I'm sure I've been to a restaurant in LA that serves it."
Bella made a little face and sighed.
"What?" Maybe she just wanted to take her home and leave her alone. The thought of that was unpleasant in the extreme. I had her for the night and I wanted to keep her for all of it.
"Just…restaurants. There'll be photographers and shit. I just want some quiet."
I considered this for a moment and the answer popped into my head. "Let's go. I know just the place."
She didn't argue and let me fold her into the passenger seat. Now that I was shaking off the horrible feelings James' texts had stirred up in me, I was feeling a little euphoric. Our carefully scripted "date" was now officially off the map, we were going rogue. For at least tonight, we'd be together like real people. I was excited and stupidly nervous at the same time. We hadn't spent time together just because we wanted to yet. I was looking forward to it, I hoped she was.
I took off west through the LA streets that were just lighting up with streetlights and neon. Bella leaned her head back against the headrest and closed her eyes. I hoped my guy was where I thought he would be. A few turns and we were there. Bingo. He was here. I pulled the car into a spot in a parking lot in front of a laundromat and killed the engine. Bella opened her eyes. We were on a fairly busy thoroughfare, cars zipping by in both directions, lined on both sides with parking lots and anonymous stores and fast food joints. I hopped out of the car and sprinted around to help her out. She looked around herself and shot me a puzzled look.
"Where are we going?"
"Right here. You have to trust me. Do you trust me, Bella?"
She stared at me for a minute, but then smiled and nodded. I took her hand and led her to a truck parked at the edge of the lot. It was a white box truck, modified to serve food out of the back. One side had a panel that was raised and propped up, creating a "take out window" in the side of the truck. There was a clip lamp inside, providing a little illumination. There was my man, milling around inside. I led Bella over to the window.
"Hey, Jorge," I called.
The middle aged Mexican man in the truck smiled when he spotted me.
"Eddie! How are you, man?"
"Pretty good. Hey Jorge, this is my friend Bella." I put my arm around Bella's waist and ushered her forward.
Bella smiled tentatively and said hello. Jorge raised his eyebrows slightly at the fact that I had company, but he said nothing, just smiled and nodded at her.
"What can I get for you tonight, Eddie?"
"Can we get six of my favorite? You know how I like them."
"You got it, my man." Jorge turned away to get my order together.
"We're eating here?" Bella asked tentatively. I smiled down at her. She was working hard at keeping her voice light, interested, even though her eyes clearly showed her uncertainty. She was a trooper. I'd never brought a woman here. With any other woman in LA, I wouldn't have dared. But I had a feeling Bella would be game.
"Oh, no, we'll take it somewhere else to eat it. I have a plan."
Bella swayed towards the window with interest. "It does smell amazing in there."
"You have no idea," I told her. "This is like a religious experience."
Jorge turned back with my order in a white paper bag.
"Hey, Jorge, you got anything to drink back there? Anything good?"
"You know I don't have a liquor license, Eddie."
"Yeah, I know you don't have a license, but that doesn't mean you don't have anything to drink."
Jorge pulled a face at me, but ducked down to the cooler that I knew lived under the counter and pulled out two Coronas. Perfect.
I threw a generous wad of cash on the counter to express my thanks. Bella and I waved goodbye to Jorge and I led her back to the car.
"Will you hold out for a few more minutes?" I knew she was practically fainting with hunger, but I also really didn't want to spend my evening with her eating in this crummy laundromat parking lot.
"I'm good."
So I gunned the engine and headed north for a few miles, then west again, weaving in and out of a residential neighborhood. The houses grew larger and more spread out as the neighborhood grew quieter and darker. A few more turns and I found the short little street I remembered. I pulled the car off to the side of the road, killed the engine, and helped Bella and our dinner out. Between the sprawling yards of two large houses, there was a narrow dirt path. In the dark like this, if you didn't know it was here, you'd never find it. Bella followed me for a few feet but then stopped.
"What's wrong?"
"Stupid shoes. The heels are really skinny and I'm getting stuck in the dirt. They're not exactly cut out for off-roading."
I turned away from her and crouched down. "Climb on."
"What?"
"Get on. I'll carry you."
"Edward, you can't carry me."
"Of course I can. What do you weigh? Like a hundred and ten? Just get on. Our dinner is getting cold."
The state of our dinner seemed to convince her. She hopped up on my back, laughing, and I hooked my hands underneath her knees. Now this was more like it. Bella wrapped her arms around my neck and gripped the bag with our dinner in one of her hands against my chest. I started back down the path. It was fully dark outside now and moonless. There was light coming from the streetlights, but the farther I walked down the path, the darker it got. Then finally I could hear it…the surf.
"Is that…the ocean?" Bella asked in wonderment.
"Yes. It's the beach."
"How did you know about this place?"
"I was at a party near here a few years back and I got really bored. I went out for a walk and found it. And this house here, the owners live in Europe, so there's almost never anyone around to care about what you're up to."
We were to the backside of the houses now and the sound of the surf was unmistakable, but we couldn't see the ocean, it was too dark. There was a low wooden reclining beach chair about a hundred feet past the back of the house, down on the beach, so I headed there and deposited Bella on the sand. She sat down and looked up at me, patting the chair next to her. Her face was so excited and happy…it made me feel that little curl of emotion in my chest again. I retrieved our bag and handed Bella one of the Coronas. She shocked the hell out of me by gripping the cap firmly and wrenching it off with her hand in one expert practiced move. Hot.
"Hot," I said out loud, since apparently I no longer have a filter.
She shrugged and was quiet for a second and I suspected that if I could see better, I'd see she was blushing. I fucking loved watching her blush.
"So what's for dinner?" she bounced a little up and down in her eagerness.
"Fish tacos."
"Fish what?"
"You've never had a fish taco?"
"Um….no."
"Jesus, Bella, you have no idea what you're missing. And Jorge's fish tacos…they're the stuff of legend. People come from all over LA to buy them off that truck."
"Seriously?"
"Seriously. Now," I handed her a taco, "Eat."
I had to hand it to her, it was an unfamiliar food to her and one that she didn't seem too enthusiastic about, but the girl dove right in to try it. She was brave.
"Oh….ummmm…" Whatever Bella was going to say trailed off in a string of happy eating sounds.
"What did I tell you? Good, huh?"
She swallowed her massive bite so she could answer. "Oh, my God. Edward. That's like the best thing I've ever eaten! Did you get more?"
I laughed but dug into the bag for another one. It was so nice to watch a girl eat for once. And Bella took a lot of pleasure in her food. I knew she'd love this. We ate in companionable silence for a few minutes, sipping our Coronas, listening to the waves out there in the dark. It was pretty freaking perfect.
"This is…um….amazing. Thanks, Edward. It's perfect."
Fuck... And just like that there was no doubt about it in my mind any more. I had developed a serious thing for this girl. I am fucking hopeless.
"I'm glad you like it. I thought you might…."
I trailed off, and the air between us suddenly felt charged, that same damned focused energy I felt at the movie theater, except now we were alone, in the dark. I imagined reaching across to her, closing the little gap between us, kissing her, leaning her back on the beach chair, pushing that incredible little green dress up to her waist…Ungh… and now I'm hard.
She must have been feeling the tension too, because she let out a little gasp then sat up and leaned back suddenly. Had we really been leaning into each other like that? The moment dissipated and I exhaled, shifting a little to alleviate my…situation. I was glad it was dark.
She cleared her throat as if to change the tone of the conversation. "So…" she shot me a grin and raised one delicate little dark eyebrow, "Eddie, huh?"
I pointed a stern finger at her. "Only Jorge gets to call me that."
She laughed. "Any man who can make food like that could call me anything he wants." She looked out into the dark in the direction of the water. "How cold is the ocean here? I mean, it's the same ocean as in Washington, but it's not as cold, right?"
"You've lived in LA for six months and you haven't touched the Pacific?"
She shook her head.
"Well," I said, grabbing her hand, "Let's go find out." We kicked off our shoes and I stripped off my socks and we headed down the beach.
It sounded simpler than it was. This far down the beach there was absolutely no light from the street anymore and without a moon it was nearly pitch black. We could hear the waves breaking just in front of us, but we couldn't quite see them.
"Where's the surf?" she asked, gripping my hand for dear life.
"I'm sure it's out here somewhere. Just keep walking forward."
"I just want some warning. What if I get hit with a big wave? I'd hate to ruin the dress."
"The swells aren't that high. And if you get wet, I'll buy you a new dress."
The sand grew packed and wet under our feet and then one step further and I abruptly felt cold water swirl all the way up my ankles as a wave rapidly surged in. Fuck!
"Fuck!" Bella shrieked, and danced away back up the beach. "That's fucking cold!"
I laughed and raced back up the beach to catch up to her. I threw my arms around her waist and pulled her back up against my chest just because I felt like it and it felt right. It felt amazing, actually. After a fraction of a second she relaxed back against me and I held her for a minute there in the dark, staring at the blackness where the ocean was. I could smell her hair, the strawberries, underneath whatever product Alice had used on her. I tipped my face down and pressed my lips gently against the top of her head. She was so close to me, it would be so easy…I could turn her just a little in my arms, tip her face back to me, press my lips to hers…
"Let's walk!" she said brightly, pulling free of my arms.
Okay, then, maybe not. I tried to ignore the dismal disappointment I was feeling that she'd pulled away from what was clearly a "moment". She slipped her hand into mine and pulled me after her down the beach. Well, she wasn't asking me to take her home, so at least there was that. I was pretty sure she was enjoying herself. And that made me happy.
We walked down the beach in silence for a moment. I was dwelling on how good it had felt to have my arms around her and how lousy it felt when she pulled away. Her voice in the dark pulled me out of my obsessing.
"Hey, Edward?"
"Hmm?"
"I have something to tell you."
Uh-oh. Nothing good ever came after someone said those six words.
"Yeah?"
"Well, I went online and…I saw you...in Hamlet. Well, part of it anyway."
I was quiet for a moment while I thought about that. She was looking me up online? What was that about? She's curious about me. That's pretty good. And she saw me do Hamlet. I felt a curious mixture of pride and embarrassment. Proud because I was good then, and I knew it, and I wanted her to see how good I could be. Embarrassed because that was my fucking peak…six years ago. I started out like that and now no one will hire me.
I thought all that but all I said was, "You did, huh?"
"Yes. Edward, that was amazing. I mean, I've never seen anything like it. I've seen some of your movies, but that was…"
I snorted derisively. "That was a long time ago," I finished for her. I couldn't keep the bitterness out of my voice.
"But you're still you. You're still capable of that."
I shook my head and looked out towards the ocean.
"No, Edward," she pulled me to a stop and looked up at me. She closed her eyes and shook her head a little, like she was trying to figure out what to say. "I know you've had some problems, and that this," she waved her hand between the two of us, "is intended to help fix it. I just…I guess I'm just glad you're trying. To fix it, I mean. Because you're worth it. Seeing what you can do, you shouldn't let that get away. You're too good."
I stared down at her, my mouth hanging open slightly.
Damn. Now I think I might love her.
She held my gaze for another heartbeat and then she turned front again and pulled me along after her. I needed to lighten the mood or else I was going to fall on my knees and beg her to be with me. And I wanted to hear her talk, so I decided to turn the subject back to her.
"You know, I've been watching you, too. Laurent downloaded all the episodes from the show for me and I've been watching them. You guys were fantastic."
She smiled at her feet and shrugged as she turned us around, heading back where we came from. "Thanks."
"What was it like when you heard you won?"
"Surreal. An out of body experience. There was no good reason for us to have lasted that long. All the other bands were so good, and so polished. We were just these dumb kids from the sticks."
"No, you were great. When you're all together…it's like magic. I see what people saw in you."
She shook her head, but she was smiling.
"It was all Jasper."
I so didn't need to hear his name right now. But I sucked it up and feigned indifference. "In what way?"
"The strategy. The song choices. See every week there was a different theme, and you had to cover a song that fit the theme. Every band had its strong points, the stuff they were really good at, but the different themes, that's what makes or breaks you. You have to pick just the right song, one that fits with the theme, but that also plays to your strengths and at the same time allows you to show off each member of the band in turn. It's incredibly hard. And it was all Jasper, finding the songs for us. Like for seventies week, he picked "Dreaming" by Blondie. Did you know it came out in seventy nine? Jazz did. We squeaked under the wire with it, but it was such a good song, we had to do it. I'm certainly not Debbie Harry, but the vocal line is right in my comfort zone, so I couldn't embarrass myself, but what's really great about it is the drum line. Emmett kicked ass. Oh, and blues week! Talk about a ball-buster! So many bands totally fell apart that week. It was so hard. But Jazz, he picked this Bonnie Raitt song for us, but from later, her crossover stuff. So I could take the vocal in a more pop direction, which was much more comfortable for me. And it so happens that Rose can play slide guitar. She never gets to do it in performance, because it's just not what we do. But that song had a slide guitar solo, so she rocked the house. Seriously, it was all anybody was talking about that week, Rose on slide guitar. Jazz was our savior, our musical genius."
Like I didn't hate the guy already. And now I was thinking about him and Bella again, an unpleasant subject that I'd managed to successfully ignore all evening. But now it made sense, her hesitancy tonight, pulling back from every intimate moment. Jasper.
She paused and shot a glance at me.
"I'm sorry, I was rambling!"
"No, I want to hear it. That's why I asked you. I love hearing you talk about your music. It's obvious how much you love it."
We were back to where we started.
"Um, we should probably get going," she said softly. "I'm in the studio at nine tomorrow morning."
"Sure. I didn't mean to keep you out so late." I shrugged, heading back up the beach to the path.
"No, Edward," she protested, "I had a really great time tonight."
I threw a small tight smile at her. "I'm glad."
But now she has to get home. For all I knew the fucker was waiting for her. It made my blood boil.
We reached the beach chair and retrieved our shoes. She carried hers and walked barefoot back to the car. I opened her door in silence. Thoughts of Jasper had turned my mood black. Because now I had to admit to myself that I had some pretty powerful feelings for Bella. And he was standing in my way. Of course there was also the ever-present possibility that she didn't want me for her own reasons, Jasper aside. She as much as told me tonight that I was a giant hopeless fuck up. Maybe I was too fucked up for her to bother with. James' texts came back to me and I flushed with anger and shame again. She would be right to stay away from me.
We drove in silence back to her house, I was lost in my own miserable thoughts, and she seemed to not want to intrude. She scrambled out when I pulled up before I could get her door for her.
She leaned back through the open passenger side window.
"I really did have a great time tonight, Edward."
"I did too, Bella. I'll see you soon."
She flashed me a melting smile and ran barefoot up the path to her house, her shoes hooked over her finger. I watched her until she disappeared into the darkness before pointing my car towards home.