Rule # 11: As far as you're concerned, Arcee is not prettier than Airachnid. (By Random Fan)

(I didn't know what she'd do; I mean, come on! It's true that the two-wheeler's prettier than her.)

(Just a warning, all Decepticons enjoy inflicting physical punishment, but the spider-femme is even more of a sadist than Doc Knock.)

(I still don't know how Airachnid got KO's energon prod. The medic is practically as fond of it as he is his finish.)

Rule # 12: Bug spray doesn't work on Airachnid. (By Autobot-Mayday)

(All it does is make her very, very angry.)

(Bruised, bleeding, and battered, I had to run back to the med-bay before she found me again. Knock Out was waiting and picked me up. Breakdown dragged us inside the room just in time – Airachnid was nearly there.)

(Fun fact: the Vehicons will protect you from Hardshell and the Insecticons, but they will not get in Airachnid's way.)

Rule # 13: If Airachnid asks if you want to see her collection, say no really loudly and then promptly exit the room. (By brave kid)

(I said yes.)

(I thought it was a collection of normal things, like maybe battle souvenirs or something…)

(I didn't know it was a collection of heads!)

(My knees still turn weak and my stomach flips over whenever someone mentions it.)

(Breakdown says he could hear me screaming halfway across the Nemesis.)

Rule # 14: Don't paint Airachnid pink. No exceptions.

(It just so happened that Knock Out had a brought my detailing supplies from my Uncle's shop – in case I got bored while he was on a mission or something.)

(Before Airachnid's revenge, let me explain the why of my so-called prank. I was mad because the spider-femme wrecked my game of hide-and-seek with Shrike, Dirge, Thrust, and some other Vehicons.)

(I wanted revenge. So I asked Breakdown what would make her really angry.)

(He thought for a moment, and then said that she hates the color pink.)

(I got my airbrush and some cans of pink paint I had been reserving for Vince's car a while back… and snuck into Airachnid's quarters. She was in recharge, thank goodness.)

(I had some ten shades of pink with me, so you can imagine what the creepy femme looked like after I finished.)

(Satisfied, I left and went to sleep.)

(I woke up with a dozen Insecticons staring at me, blasters activated. Imagine my shock… and mortal terror.)

(Breakdown had to rescue me for the third time that week.)

(It never gets old, hearing him yell "Hammer time!")

Rule # 15: If you value your life, don't bother her when she's – Never mind, just don't bother her at all.

(I can still hear myself yelling that I only wanted to ask a question.)

(I'm a really bad liar, and Airachnid knows it.)

(She looked like she was about ready to murder me – and Knock Out for bringing me on board in the first place.)

Rule # 16: Just because Airachnid can get the Insecticons to do her bidding does not mean she is 'Queen Bee', so to speak.

(Remember when I said that the Insecticons were not bumblebees?)

(Apparently implying that Airachnid is their queen automatically makes them bumblebees again…)

(And remember when I mentioned earlier that the Vehicons won't stand in Airachnid's way?)

(Six Insecticons, one royally pissed Airachnid versus a human that barely stands tall enough to reach their knees with absolutely no backup at all.)

(So not a fair fight…)

(You'll never guess who came to my rescue – Dreadwing! Yeah, I don't get it either…)

Rule # 17: Getting between Airachnid and Starscream when they're arguing is hazardous to your health.

(I almost got stepped on twice…)

(…I was almost incinerated by a blast three times…)

(…I nearly got hit by a missile twice…)

(… And after getting exasperated and telling them to just shut the frag up… I was thrown into the wall…)

(…Which resulted in two broken ribs, a fractured collar bone, and a tear in my shoulder.)

(I should really watch my step around those two.)

Rule # 18: Mentioning the MECH Incident? Bad idea.

(Primus, did I get in for the worst rant of my entire life.)

(Believe me, I know rants. Knock Out gives 'em every time I do something he thinks could get me killed or even worse, when he gets scratched up.)

(I was not prepared for Airachnid to go ballistic on me! Being one of the smaller of the Decepticons does not mean she isn't packing some serious firepower. Creepy spider-femme's got cannons, blasters, blades, missiles and those talons.)

(By the way, those talons – they could make you lose a limb, or your life. Good thing she only hit me in the right arm – the one Knock Out had to replace after… Well, I don't want to talk about it right now.)

Rule # 19: Following Rule 14, the Autobot Arcee should not be spoken about within earshot of Airachnid.

(She's Megatron's torture specialist for a reason…)

(… I think you get the idea.)

Rule # 20: Following items 14 and 15, mention of Jackson Darby is not recommended.

(I know Darby from High School, and never really liked him.)

(He just seemed – I don't know… arrogant? Well, not really arrogant, but there was something about him that set my teeth on edge whenever I passed him by.)

(Now I find myself feeling a little respect for him. He's clever; I'll give him that…)

(But what really impressed me is that he blew up Airachnid's ship.)

(And now she's intent on revenge… and will try to offline anyone who even says his name.)

(Breakdown had to rescue me again… Knock Out was busy that week…)

Oh, and before I forget – Next Chapter: Dealing with Starscream.

Good luck, Shiloh.