2

Jack lay there with the deep seated knowledge he is on the TARDIS again. He felt the air on his freshly grown skin and sighed softly as he remembered the time Ianto had covered his bits with his waistcoat while regenerating, overcome with embarrassment for him.

With a groan that showed his age… even if the reset was a hunky late twenty something.. well… he seemed more of a young thirty something now. Each regen a little older of only by an hour or so each time. So… did this mean in time he would be regenerating as an old man? Unless he did the 'die every day' thing again, that was not something he really had to worry about, right? Nothing to lose your head over.

Jack calmly dressed and placed his VM on it's usual wrist, feeling weird. Something was different so he opened it and checked. The pouch was there, everything seemed fine. He put it down to the regen. It had been a hard one, left him hungry and slightly buzzed.

He wandered out to the kitchen, silently thanking the TARDIS for making it so close and the smells were amazing. He stepped into the kitchen to ask the Doctor if he had finally learnt what coffee was… god, a terrible thought… to find someone there he did not expect.

"Ianto?"

The man turned and he saw Ianto there, standing so still that he was like a wax work figure. If he had not seen him moving at first he might have believed him a statue. Then he blinked.

"Ianto?" Jack repeated, not sure if he should move towards him or not. I mean… what version was this "Ianto… what date is it for you?"

The eye roll told him that was not the right question as Ianto said in reply "I am not from a timeline Sir. I do believe I am… new."

"New." Jack repeated, now seeing a slight difference in the way he stood. This was not Ianto.

Not-Ianto canted his head "You do that a lot don't you. Repeat things when confused. I am not the one you knew… I am a… ghost? Er… a representation. I have memories and some of the same bits but… I am … you are used to watching a video and I am the still photo of the scene you watch… in time I will become the moving image, the video… but not all the still shots are here yet."

Jack sat heavily "You are not Ianto."

"Well… yes and no" Not-Ianto replied "I am like … the smell left behind that tells you what was once there… what might be there again. I am a regen. In time, the memories of my donor will become more, the library in the DNA files will open and I will become more like the one I was… the one you knew but… I will never be him. I am something different. As close as you will get."

"You hair is darker" Jack agreed as he looked over the man "Your shoulders are slightly wider too."

Not-Ianto frowned. "Really? Anything else different?"

Jack leaned in close and sniffed him, making Not-Ianto giggle softly in a very un-Ianto way. "Your smell… it's not the same but… you are a new regen so… maybe in time, the coffee smell will be stronger. The spicy smell is different though."

"Spicy?" Not-Ianto stared at Jack and Jack saw it.

"Your eyes… they were always steely grey. They… they are a brilliant blue" Jack said with interest.

"Maybe it's a windy-Woo thing?" Not-Ianto asked as he settled into a chair."Blue is our colour after all."

"I don't know… you don't exactly come with a manual right?" Jack countered.

"I don't know Sir" Not-Ianto frowned then shrugged "who knows. Each is an enigma wrapped in confusion and energy."

"Your accent is stronger now" Jack admitted "you are getting more like him as we talk."

"I think… I think the longer we talk, the more I feel…me. I remember… a glass wall with smoke behind it… it's where I died right? Was it smoke inhalation or something?" Not-Ianto frowned.

"Gas."

"Ah. Something about… bloody beans?" Not-Ianto frowned "and… oh. Oh no… no…God."

Jack watched Not-Ianto rise from the chair and moved in a small circle, upset beyond control as something seemed to tear at him.

"Ianto?" Jack rose and reached for him "Are you OK?"

Not-Ianto slowly stopped revolving to stare at him then he said "No. No, I don't think I am. Don't… don't touch me. OK? You… how could you just… no."

Jack was left stunned as Not-Ianto strode from the room in patented Jones-Hit-n-Run fashion.

.

.

"Would it be easier to have no memoires at all?" The Doctor asked.

"Yes… no… I don't … it is all jumbled." Not-Ianto sighed, rubbing his face in a familiar way "I don't know. Part of me... well… most of me just wants him to hold me."

"Well… do that then. Even as human, you were always conflicted about things. The old you really self-hated a lot you know, never thought you were good enough for him" the Doctor explained "He is a good man that sometimes does bad things, necessary things. I have to admit I have sometimes used him for things I was unable to do myself… I know that is cowardly but Jack is… still Jack."

Not-Ianto sighed as he looked down at his hands on the table, then he said softly "Yeah. He still makes my heart skip."

"If it is easier, don't listen to the old voices, the memories are only that… things that already happened and cannot be changed so why dwell? Jack lives in the here and now, try that too. Listen to your heart and act… stop looking for past things as a guide. After all… at the end of the day you are not Ianto Jones… you are… the butterfly emerged from the chrysalis he was zipped into." The Doctor advised and he got a snort in return.

"Right… a body bag style cocoon …. OK."