Disclaimer: Negative aspects of a story will be exaggerated for comedic purposes. Just because a story is constantly ridiculed does not mean that it is bad. Any Fanfiction that is good will be praised by the end.)

[The following is an independently run review show. The views expressed are solely those of the reviewer(s) and are not that of spucubed Productions or its affiliates.]

Magolor's Coffeehouse

Episode 17: A Halcandran's Love by RupturedStar5

TinyURL: wc6k2gm

Magolor sat at his usual seat in the Kirby Cafe. It was late at night, so all the lights in the building were off, with the only illumination coming from Magolor's laptop as he searched for a decent fan fiction to review. As he scrolled through the search results, a story caught his eye:

The One Who Cared

By: Sleepy Kokallie

Marx has been hiding his secret that he actually cared for Magolor. He thinks that Magolor would only reject his feelings and think he's wasting his time. Would Magolor do that? Find out... ( Magolor x Marx warning! )

"Interesting," Magolor thought out loud. "I'll keep it in mind…"

He scrolled down a little further, finding another fanfic:

Dreaming

By: AnotherDimensional

Marx x Magolor fic, basically a dream world and an alternate universe of sorts. Magolor's hunt for power and the Master Crown lands him in a world of bright lights and crystals. A world full of dreams and desires left unaccomplished anywhere but within the boundaries of the dimension. Or where Magolor crash lands... Elsewhere. Rated T for a bit of swearing.

"Okay… okay…" Magolor muttered, paying little attention to the story and just continuing to scroll down, eventually finding another story in the queue:"

In the Basement

By Sleepy Kokallie

What could happend in the basement? Well, after Magolor and Marx are literally thrown there... What could go wrong? (Contains: slight yaoi, fluff?) I wrote this on my 3ds. EXPECT MISTAKES

"Seriously?" Magolor asked, starting to get frustrated. "What's with all the stories where I'm shipped with Marx? I mean, yeah, I get it. We're basically the same character, but that doesn't mean we should instantly be brought together. Honestly, if we really were a couple, we'd probably be at each other's throats the whole time. It's great that you guys like the two of us, I'm not gonna lie, but keep the shipping to a minimum, okay?"

"Alright, let's just keep looking…" he muttered to himself, continuing to scroll down in search of a half-decent story that piqued his interest. He scrolled down for a while, not finding anything. Eventually, he found a story that didn't actually intrigue him very much. Instead, he bluntly said, "Yeah, whatever, I don't care anymore. Let's just get this over with."

A Halcandran's Love

By: RupturedStar5

What happens when a certain Halcandran developes feelings for a certain Popstarian? (Contains major Kirby x Magolor)(Oneshot)

Love is powerful. It has a strong meaning. For a simple wizard, Love seemed meaningless.

Magolor stared at his computer for a brief moment before replying, "Well, it is. It's all just a chemical reaction that tells us who to mate with. Now, you may just call it a silly Rick & Morty reference, but science has proven it to be true. Love is fake, no one exists for a reason, Han Solo dies in The Force Awakens. Life is just a big pile of disappointment, like it or not."

Suddenly, Magolor caught himself before he could spout any more nonsense. He stuttered for a brief moment before responding, "Let's just keep going, shall we?"

Magolor didn't understand the concept of love. It was more of a 'oh yeah, it's love, so what?' meaning to him. The wizard thought love was just something simple and that was all there is to it.

Magolor snickered and leaned back in his chair. "It's like the fans know how my brain works," he scoffed.

What he was about to experience was a whole different perspective.

A couple months back, Magolor had earned quite the reputation. He almost took over Dreamland— no, the world. Kirby managed to stop his evil plan and defeat him with one swift swing of his ultra sword, breaking the crown in pieces.

After his defeat, Magolor found himself in a puddle of his own guilt. He decided to owe Kirby an apology by building a huge theme park for the little puff.

"Well, that's an oversimplified version of what happened, but yeah, that's pretty accurate."

"Poyo?" Kirby asked impatiently.

"Don't worry, it won't be long." Magolor chirped, his hands covering Kirby's eyes.

Both inched to a hidden part of Popstar, behind Whispy Woods Forest and over a few bushes. The place Magolor spent all this time to make up for Kirby.

"Three, two, one..."

Unfolding his hands, Magolor let Kirby take in what was before his very eyes.

"P-poyo!?"

"Surprise! I built you your very own theme park!" Magolor said ecstatically.

"Probably not such a hidden spot anymore, considering that there's an amusement park there now!"

"I felt bad for what I've done. I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused." Magolor lamented, his ears pinned down in shame.

"Do you accept my-"

Kirby rushed over to embrace the Halcandran wizard in a tight bear hug. Tears spilled out and soaked Magolor's clothes.

"Poyoyo! Poyo poy!" The pink puff cried happily.

A blush crept onto Magolor's cheeks as Kirby nuzzled his face into his chest. His heart fluttered and he was grateful Kirby hadn't noticed it beating literally a thousand miles.

"Now, I have to admit, these romance stories really do know how to write emotions. Sure, we make fun of them, but they're still pretty good in the writing department. I really don't see how this story could be ruined to me at all-"

"Tank you, Maggie..." Kirby sighed.

Suddenly, all footage of Magolor was quickly replaced with footage of Dawko's reaction to completing FNAF: Ultimate Custom Night. He immediately goes insane, screaming and crying and carrying on. After nearly a full minute of Dawko crying like a three-year-old, the footage returns to Magolor, who is now leaning over the table with his hands over his face.

"Why?" he muttered, removing his face from his hands. "Why did you have to make Kirby talk? You were doing so well, but then you just had to make him talk. Now, it's not that I have a problem with him talking. It's just that you have him do it out of nowhere with no explanation for it. You could at least say something along the lines of 'during the course of Magolor's time in Dreamland, he was able to teach Kirby some basic English.' That's all you have to do."

The utter nickname had Magolor's fur stand on end. He was too busy hugging Kirby back to realize he was purring really loudly.

Magolor thought deeply for a brief moment, then immediately stopped. "Oh yeah, that's right," Magolor said dismissively. "HAL says I'm a cat now."

Magolor was restless that night. He couldn't stop thinking about Kirby and how he hugged him. He tossed and turned in his bed capsule, groaning at how he couldn't sleep. He remembered all the times he and Kirby had bonded and got along. Not to mention he helped him repair the Lor Starcutter.

"Why? Why can't I stop this... this feeling in my chest?" He asked himself.

"Oh, your chest pains can be a number of things," Magolor said in a doctorly tone. "It could be heartburn, bronchitis, some unknown virus consuming your lungs- anything, really."

"Maybe you can help me, Lor."

The lights slowly turned on, lighting up a pathway to the main control room of the ship. Magolor hovered over to the ship's large screen and stared.

"Lor, can you tell me what I am feeling? Eh, it's complicated, but I can't stop thinking about him."

The screen searched through bits of data and information of what Magolor described, before pulling up an answer on the screen.

"Your heart desires something more than taking over the universe." Lor's screen read.

"Excuse me, what?" Magolor choked.

"Your heart wants Kirby's. You are in love with Kirby of the Stars."

"So?" Magolor asked, shrugging. "Who isn't in love with Kirby at this point? Even those who tried to murder him in the past (myself included) have come to enjoy him. Loving Kirby is normal, guys. Don't let anyone tell you different."

"Lor, take me to where Kirby is."

Kirby was on a hill, star gazing and enjoying the peaceful moonlight. It was a common activity for him to do given the chance. He spotted a star shaped portal and saw the Lor Starcutter exit from it.

Chamillionaire: They see me rollin'/ They hatin'

The ship landed gently at the bottom of the hill. Magolor exited the ship slowly, searching for Kirby.

"Poyo!" Kirby shouted, running down the hill to greet the Halcandran.

Magolor smiled under his scarf at Kirby.

"Hey dude." Magolor grinned.

Kirby took Magolor's hand and pulled him to the top of the hill. He gestured Magolor to sit down, patting the grass with his paw. As told, Magolor sat down beside Kirby. A bright blush covered his face, but thankfully was hidden in the dark night.

"I have been meaning to tell you something, Kirby." Magolor said, taking in a nervous breath.

"For the longest time, I thought love was meaningless. It had no point in my perspective and I didn't like the concept at first. When I met you, you changed my whole view. I knew how to love and the feeling is incredible."

"Honestly, I don't think you really love him," Magolor shook his head. "I think you just have a really great friendship with him."

Kirby cocked his head, making Magolor chuckle.

"What I mean is... I love you Kirby. Getting to know you was the best decision I have ever made. You are my world to me. I don't expect anything back, but I care a lot about you."

Kirby was blushing madly. Was Magolor in love with him? Was this just a dream?. Just when he thought it was a dream, Magolor gave him a small kiss on his cheek. Finally, Kirby mustered up the courage and gave Magolor a full on kiss on his lips.

JonTron: I quit!

Magolor's ears shot up at the unexpected kiss. His face heated up and he felt as if he were going to faint right then. Kirby pulled back and smiled widely.

"Wuv you, Maggie." Kirby managed to squeak.

Magolor didn't care what was going on around him. All he cared about was his new lover in front of him.

"Love you too, dude... love you too."

"And that's the story," Magolor said. "To be honest, it isn't that bad. I liked it, even. It's just a nice little story about me and Kirby. My only problem is that it had to be a romance. I think this would've worked much better as a simple friendship one-shot. But other than that, really nice story."

"Well, that's all for today!" he exclaimed, closing his laptop. "I'm Magolor, and this was Magolor's Coffeehouse!"