Rule # 151: There are two types of warheads; make sure you know which kind everyone is thinking of before acting. (By PixelusPrime)
(First off, there are the candy warheads - you know, the really sour ones? And then there are actual warheads, as in the things that explode.)
(Yeah, Decepticons don't know what that first one is, so be sure to explain.)
(Or else they might actually try to eat one of the exploding warheads.)
(I found this out the hard way.)
(I still kind of miss Kickback, even if he was an Insecticon...)
Rule # 152: The 'Chicken Song 9' is not to be played more than twice in a row. (By loki love)
(What can I say? I was bored. I was so bored, I was beyond bored. Boredom could not hold a candle to what I was feeling. Rumble was doing something he refused to tell me about, Frenzy was on Recon, and the rest of the crew was wrapped up in the whole 'Omega Keys' fiasco.)
(I wanted - No, I needed attention. Everyone was acting like I didn't exist, or otherwise didn't need to be noticed. Even Knock Out was ignoring me.)
(How could they ignore me?)
(To get the attention I needed, I put on the most annoying song I could think of that wasn't already banned. Hence this rule.)
(Playing it once is barely tolerable; twice, anger-inducing; any more than that, and you're in big trouble.)
(Is it bad that I was happy when Dreadwing stuck me in the Brig for playing the song three times?)
Rule # 153: Do not, under any circumstances, mention sparkling pictures. (By inkdragon13)
(I had the crazy idea that when Lord Megatron was a sparkling, he was adorable, not evil. When I explained to Soundwave - who is a really good listener, by the way - he appeared to take a pause for thought.)
(The next day, Soundwave sought me out and displayed a digital file of Megzy as a sparkling. And I was right - he was adorable!)
(Between my 'Aww-ing' and Soundwave's switching between pictures of the Lord of the Decepticons, I didn't notice Lord Megatron approaching from behind me.)
(Fail. Just fail.)
(Megzy didn't buy the whole, "I wanted to know the history!" routine.)
(Four day recon mission with Airachnid and Starscream in France. No Vehicons, just me and the two Decepticons who try almost daily to end my life.)
Rule # 154: Threatening to neuter Ravage will not end well. (By inkdragon13)
(I didn't actually say I was going to neuter him. I said I was going to murder him. But since I couldn't talk too well after being dragged around by the Decepticon insignia choker Lord Megatron made it mandatory for me to wear - something about making sure people knew I was Decepticon property? - all day by Ravage, my statement was misinterpreted.)
(I still can't believe that's what they thought I said. And by 'they,' I mean the twins.)
(One time I was glad Soundwave records everything that happens on the Nemesis.)
Rule # 155: If you must play Transformers: the Game, be sure only to play on the Decepticon Campaign. (By inkdragon13)
(I had nothing to do and Frenzy had rented - more likely stolen - a copy of Transformers: the Game. So after five minutes of weighing the merits and benefits of pulling a prank on Starscream to those of playing the game, I chose to play the game.)
(A wise choice... at first.)
(I started playing on the Autobot Campaign and soon got bored with shooting Decepticons. But when I tried to switch sides, it wouldn't let me.)
(In fact, the game glitched when I tried. It was at that point I seriously considered dropping the controller and pranking Screamer anyway.)
(Because I didn't want to risk my life for the second time that day - don't ask, please - I kept playing the Autobot campaign.)
(Dreadwing walked in a few minutes later, demanding to know what I'd done and why I was hiding in the control room. When he saw I was playing a game, he then demanded to know what I was doing.)
(Somebody - seriously, somebody just kill me now. I answered with the first thing that popped into my head, which happened to be, "Killin' Megatron.")
(Primus, somebody shoot me. It would almost be a mercy.)
(Lord Megatron didn't throw me in the Brig. Instead I wound up wishing I had pranked Starscream. Hardshell is fragging terrifying when under orders to torture with extreme prejudice.)
Rule # 156: Do not invite fangirls over for a sleepover. (By Corona Pax)
(They drove me crazy. They drove the crew crazy.)
(I don't know why I invited them over for a sleepover in the first place.)
(What happened was, they started talking about how 'hot and sexy' Knock Out is. I had seen this a thousand times online, so this I could put up with. Then thay started talking about Breakdown and his hammer. Never before had hammer time grown so old. Then it was "Damn, those heels!" with Starscream. Then 'Slendermech' for Soundwave. Fangirls sure are masters of the obvious. And 'Bucket-head' for Megzy.)
(But what really got me is, "Rumble looks so adorable in this form! Have you seen a anything even close to that adorable.")
(That irritated me. The one thing Rumble is not is adorable. He's annoying, rude, disrespectful, and immature... But he's also pretty sweet. And he's cute, not adorable.)
(No, I was not jealous! What makes you think that?)
Rule # 157: Stay off the mining equipment. (By Wredan)
(You are tiny compared to Decepticons. Compared to the mining equiment, you're a slagging insect. Don't get on the stupid equipment.)
(I can barely use the controls on the Nemesis. The controls on the drilling machine are twice that big.)
(I don't know how Darby managed to use it when he, the two-wheeler, the Wrecker, the Exchange Student, Megatron, and Starscream were trapped together in the mine.)
(The result of trying to duplicate that feat - massive explosion.)
(Hello, medical bay.)
Rule # 158: Any song with ridiculous and/or nonsensical lyrics is banned. (By Anonymous BW FG)
('Boom De Yada' and 'Beans in my Ears' being two examples of songs in this category.)
(Everyone get annoyed with those songs after a few times of listening to them.)
(Including me.)
(Soundwave got annoyed and ended up hanging me by my foot in the rec-room. He also tied my hands behind my back and programmed my IPod - a new one Knock Out got after the Song that Never Ends incident - to play 'Boom De Yada' for six hours.)
(Rumble and Frenzy came to watch. Frenzy was laughing his head off. Rumble was saying "I'm sorry" over and over again.)
(By the time the six hours were up, I was near tears because the song made absolutely no sense. Also, I was hanging upside down for six hours, so I couldn't actually feel my lower body at all.)
Rule # 159: Zombie games are fun as long as you don't play with the Wrecker. (By Anonymous BW FG)
(I had been captured by the Autobots because Starscream deliberately left me on the battlefield after calling retreat. Needless to say, KO was not happy with Screamer when he found out.)
(But as to why I was playing video games with the Wrecker... Suffice to say that I made a bet with the Exchange Student that I could beat her at her favorite game. I did win that bet, though she maintains I cheated. Then she said that the Wrecker would definately beat me.)
(After the fourth round of playing the Zombie game, neither one of us had won.)
(I was ready to call it quits, but the Wrecker insisted we keep playing.)
(Finally I said I was going to relax away from the Autobots and left while we were in the middle of a round.)
(Video games had suddenly gotten boring.)
Rule # 160: 'Roll Out' better fits the Autobots. Ergo, Lord Megatron will not tolerate any playing of the song on the warship. (By KithiaIsTheVillan)
(Most of the Decepticons are flyers - only a quarter of the Vehicons have land-based vehicle modes - so most of them do not 'Roll Out' per se.)
(But I thought it would be funny for those that could roll out to do it to a song of the same title.)
(Yeah, Lord Megatron didn't find it funny.)
(I had quite a bit of fun redecorating the cell in the Brig with my name engraved on the door.)
(I've spent at least three hundred hours in there so far. And the total keeps climbing.)
The next two or three chapters are General Rules, but so I'm ahead, the next theme set of rules is - So You Had a Bad Day.