Chapter 6

"Can we talk?"

Arizona raised her head and sighed. She knew she wasn't going to get any rest. "Sure."

Arizona raised up on the couch and was now sitting across from Erica.

"Thanks for letting me talk to Callie."

Arizona gave a judging chuckle. "I didn't let you. Callie is a grown woman that can do as she pleases. I trust that what she does will not be negative on us."

"She is happy. She told me you were talking about marriage and kids."

Arizona wasn't sure why Callie hadn't told Erica about her condition. "We are talking about it, yes."

"Dr. Robbins, I just want to make sure that there isn't any tension between us. Callie is happy, I am happy, we have both moved on."

"I understand that both of you have moved on, but you need to understand something too. You hurt her. O'Malley hurt her. My biggest goal is to make sure that Callie isn't hurtagain. As long as you and I are on the same page with that, we are good."

"I am glad that she has someone that protects her the way you do."

Arizona leaned over toward Erica. "I am going to tell you like I told someone else once. I grew up with the name Arizona. I learned to fight young. Nothing will spark that like someone messing with Callie. We understand each other?"

Erica couldn't help but smile at the woman sitting across from her. She was an attractive woman, with her blonde hair, dimples and bright blue eyes. Erica had to admit, she was slightly jealous. "I understand, Dr. Robbins."

Arizona stood and just before walking out the door, she turned and looked at Erica one last time. "You even look at Calliope wrong and I will kick your ass."

When Arizona turned around she bumped into Cristina. Cristina chuckled and whispered to Arizona. "You go roller-skate girl."

"Hush, Yang." Arizona walked around Cristina.

Cristina just looked in on Erica. "She just looks girlie." Cristina laughed as she walked away.

Arizona walked out of the lounge just as her pager was sounding. "God, what now?"

She made her way to the nurses' station. "Someone page me?"

"Yes Dr. Robbins. You have a visitor in the family room."

Arizona turned toward the room and then back to the nurse. "Who is it?"

"I am not sure."

"Oh. Okay. Thanks."

Arizona walked into the room. "Well look at you."

"McKenzie?" Arizona quickly made her way across the room and hugged the woman.

"What are you doing here?"

"What? I can't come and visit my favorite sister-in-law."

"I am still your only sister-in-law, right?" Arizona chuckled.

"Well yes, but I was really trying to be nice. Besides it wouldn't matter if I had 15. You would still be my favorite."

"Right. Here sit down. What's going on with you? How are the kids?" Arizona clapped her hands in excitement about talking to McKenzie.

"They are good. They miss you. We all miss you."

"I know. I am trying to get out there and see mom and dad. I would love to see the kids.

How's Ben?"

"He is good. Umm..." McKenzie obviously had something on her mind.

"What's up?"

"Your Mom told me about Callie. They said they haven't seen you this happy since…well."

"Kenzie…"

"That you are getting married?"

"Yes." Arizona smiled at her friends amusement.

"Arizona Robbins getting married. You must really love this girl."

"Yeah. I really do."

"They told me about the accident and what happened after. They said you guys were talking about kids and now…..well now…I am so sorry."

"It's been hard on her."

"I remember how you felt about children. I remember the fears you had."

"It's beyond that."

"Have you told Callie about Jessica?"

"No."

"Don't you think you should? I mean that is huge part of who you are."

"I thought maybe I could once. Then I did the whole I'm not broken speech and it was gone. She really wanted children. We were so stuck on what we wanted, we almost lost each other. Then we knew we loved each other; that we could change. My change just seemed so silly when I saw how she wanted that."

"You were my best friend, Arizona. I know you better than anyone. I remember how you felt about children after Jess. Do you really think you just said you would for her or did you want kids?"

"I wanted her to have what she needed. I would do anything for her."

McKenzie was just staring at Arizona as she talked. Arizona knew what was coming next.

"You look just like him. Your brother would have loved seeing you this successful. He was so proud of you. You know that, right?"

A tear ran down Arizona's face. "I miss him so bad some days that it is hard to get through the day."

"Every time I look at you, I see him. Those Dimples and eyes. That blonde hair and that the sun is always shining in my world attitude. He was amazing. I know that I can't imagine getting close to someone and losing them again. I get that Arizona, but this baby thing, you can't spend the rest of your life running from what happened. Jess wouldn't want that for you."

"I just don't know what to do now. She can't carry a child."

"She can't. Only she can't, Arizona."

McKenzie moved over close to Arizona. "He was just like you. When we first got married, DJ didn't want kids. He said he just wanted it to be us. We could go vacation together and see the world. Just us. The day he got his orders was the first time he realized what we may have missed. He knew that I wanted kids. He knew that I hadn't pushed him, but there wasn't enough time to plan. It's almost like he knew." McKenzie looked down as a tear ran down her face. "It was like he knew he wouldn't come home. He came home one day and said that he wanted to try. I didn't understand because we didn't have time to try. DJ was so afraid that he was going to leave me alone. He came home two days before they left and handed me a card. I didn't know what the hell it was. He said that if anything happened to him he wanted to leave me something behind. Something that would be ours."

"What was it for?"

"A sperm bank."

"What? He left you….."

"Yes." McKenzie chuckled. "That was his way. After DJ was killed, I couldn't breathe most days. I did good to get out of bed and into the shower. He had been gone five months the first time I tried."

"Kenzie, I never knew."

"I know. I couldn't bring myself to tell your Mom and Dad. I knew that if it didn't work they would be devastated. So I did it alone. Just me, the doctor, and DJ. It felt right that way. I lost the baby about 2 months into the pregnancy."

"Oh god. I am so sorry."

"I tried one more time. When it failed, I…..I just couldn't. By this time DJ had been gone over a year. Ben and I started getting close and I just…I just couldn't take the lose anymore. I loved him Arizona ,but I had to let him go."

"I understand. We all understood. Ben is wonderful to you and the girls. He was good for you." By now both women were crying. Arizona hugged McKenzie. "We always knew he wanted you to go on."

McKenzie pulled back. "See that is just it. He would want you to move on too. He wouldn't want you to miss what he did. When he thought he may never come back from Iraq, he knew he had missed his chance to have a baby. Don't be like him and let that go. It was a freak thing, Arizona. It was a long time ago." McKenzie reached into her pocket and pulled out a card. She kissed the card and held it out. "Here."

"What's that?"

"It was his gift to me. Now it's his gift to you."

Arizona took the card. "Your Mom said that Callie still may have some eggs they can use, but it needed to be carried by someone else. He is your brother. Callie's egg with his sperm, Arizona. The baby could even look like you. God knows he did. That baby would have your DNA. Your parent's would be…"

"It's biological Grandparents." Arizona looked up at McKenzie.

"I would be no different than a sister carrying a baby for another sister. Your blood would run through it's veins. He would be honored to help you. He loved you more than anyone. You were his best friend. Other than me, the one he missed the most over there. He would want to help you. I mean I have Ben and the girls now. I will never use it. I know it may be a little weird, but it would be your family too. Fifty percent Torres and fifty percent Robbins. Arizona, those are numbers biological parents get."

"Thank you. I…I'll think about it. I just don't want Callie knowing yet."

"I know Daniel told me you were keeping all this from Callie."

"I just don't want her hopes up yet."

"I understand. Listen I was in town on business. My flight leaves in a couple hours so I need to make my way to the airport. I hear you and Callie and coming out to visit."

"I think she needs to meet Mom and Dad. Then we are going to Miami so I can met her family."

"So I am assuming I will see you when you are home?"

"Of course."

McKenzie hugged Arizona. "It was good seeing you and I can't wait to meet this wonder woman." McKenzie laughed.

"You will love her. Everyone does."

Arizona walked her sister-in-law out of the hospital. As they hugged they exchanged 'see you in a few weeks'. Arizona watched as the cab pulled away. She pulled the card from her lab coat pocket and said under her breathe, "At least it couldn't happen again."