Rule # 171: Waxing the floor is acceptable. Using Knock Out's wax to do it, however, is not. (By tankbuster626)

(Oh, Primus, this was so fun to watch. But it was totally not cool.)

(Well, not everything that goes wrong or gets messed with is necessarily my fault, you know. It was only two years ago I actually pulled my first prank. I've been with the Decepticons for four.)

(I would never mess with KO's wax. I might mess with his paint for kicks and giggles, but I respect the wax.)

(But back to the rule. It was an early morning and I was walking to check up on Breakdown after he got ripped apart by a certain spider glitch and we salvaged his body and put him back together. Thank Primus his spark was still intact. Anyways, I was carrying a cup of coffee since it was, like, five in the morning and I am a terror without my coffee.)

(Once I reached the hall leading up to the med-bay I found out why Frenzy and Rumble had requested cleaning duty the previous day.)

(Hot coffee is a great thing to have spilled all over you when you're barely awake.)

(That was sarcasm, if you couldn't tell. It burned me pretty badly.)

(When Knock Out came running to see what was wrong, he slid across the floor and would've crushed me had the twins not come to my rescue.)

(Brilliant idea, guys. Stealing Knock Outs's wax and waxing the floor with it so no one can stand up is totally something Lord Megatron would condone.)

(Yes, that was sarcasm, too.)

Rule # 172: Do not replace Airachnid's webbing with silly string. (By tankbuster626)

(I was angry at Airachnid for rejecting Breakdown one time too many. Sure, the guy's desperate, but he's such a softie at spark. The poor 'con was almost crying the last time she told him no.)

(I got Knock Out - yes, he cares for Breaky enough he's willing to pull a prank with me - to help. He commed for Airachnid to come down for a routine diagnostic. Then when she did, he pretended that there was something seriously wrong with her systems and put her into stasis.)

(While she was unable to stop us, Knock Out removed her webbing and let me replace it with a huge resivoir of silly string.)

(An hour later the medical bay was covered in silly string, Airachnid had me pinned against the wall with one of her extra legs, and Knock Out was shrieking about the aforementioned silly string getting stuck in his gears.)

(Breakdown walked in during the middle of all this.)

(And promptly walked out.)

(Aft. He could have at least helped us.)

Rule # 173: Do not chance the destination of a GroundBridge while someone is using it. (By tankbuster626)

(I felt so sorry for the Vehicon I did this to.)

(... He was a grounder.)

(I entered random coordinates as he was trying to bridge to the Everglades. Something about a low-frequency locator becon?)

(The Vehicon ended up in the middle of the Dead Sea. We couldn't rescue him.)

(So sorry, random grounder Vehicon. I made sure to carve a little note about you into the wall of my room.)

Rule # 174: There is almost nothing Breakdown enjoys more than recharging. Do not paint him while he is doing so. (By tankbuster626)

(Breaky was practically begging for it. He fell asleep next to where Knock Out keeps his paints and stuff for touching up his finish.)

(After five minutes of an internal battle that the wrong side won, I asked KO, "Shouldn't your partner look as fabulous as you do?" It took the doc a moment to figure out what I meant, but he enthusiastically agreed and we set to work.)

(You have no idea how awesome Breakdown looks in purple.)

(No, that's not an invitation to paint him so you can find out if it's true.)

(He's got that hammer for a reason, if you know what I mean...)

Rule # 175: Any of the Transformers series are not allowed to be played on the Nemesis. (By tankbuster626)

(There are specific reasons different series are banned. Allow me to list them.)

(G1 is banned because I've made too many jokes to Soundwave about, "Hey, the Eighties called; they want their tech back!")

(Beast Wars is banned because of Barney Megatron. Just pretend I didn't say that.)

(Armada is banned because it showcases a human-loving, not-so-evil Starscream. Also because his death made me tear up, it was so bittersweet. That Alexis girl really loved Starscream, even if he was a Decepticon.)

(Energon is banned because of that wacko Cyclonus/Snow Cat. He scared Shiv.)

(Cybertron is banned because the crew got tired of the concept of Minicons.)

(Robots in Disguise is banned because Side Burn and his obsession with red sports cars terrified Knock Out enough that he wouldn't come out of his quarters for a week. Breakdown was mad at me, and I was extremely sorry.)

(Animated is banned because the Starscream clones make Screamer nostalgic for his fellow Seekers who may or may not be actually related to him.)

(Rescue Bots is banned because there are no Decepticons featured. Nuff said.)

Rule # 176: Most Decepticons already have holoforms, so there is no need to look them up on Deviantart. (By Sunstreaker's Squishy)

(I really needed some human interaction, okay? The 'cons are great and all, but when you're the only human around for as long as I've been here, you start to miss all those annoying people you grew up with. Like Vince, for example. Nah, I'm kidding; Vince was a great friend.)

(Anyhow, it got so bad I was reduced to looking up pictures of fans' interpretations of humanized Decepticons on Deviantart. Is it wrong I thought some of said interpretations were - and please don't tell Knock Out I said this - hot? It was bad enough when Frost looked over my shoulder and told the entire crew what I was looking at.)

(Primus! Can't my business just stay my business for once?!)

(Well, Knock Out, being my guardian, understood why I was looking at the pictures and took me out for a drive and to a car show. I had a good time, even if we got kicked out after Knock Out knocked out - no pun intended - some guy who tried to flirt with me. Damn posessive guardian. And when we returned to the Nemesis, we found out that Breakdown, Starscream, and Soundwave had upgraded their holoforms to better fit the fans' interpretations I had accidentally left up on the screen.)

(Breaky bear-hugged me in holoform and offered to make sure no one tried to do anything to me while I slept. This lead to Knock Out grabbing me with his holoform and practically snarling "Mine!" at his partner.)

(It's not as bad as it sounds, honest! All it really is is a misunderstanding of how the guardian thing is supposed to work. The Autobots get the whole 'Friends and Partners' part of it. The only aspect Knock Out fully understands is the 'Mine' one.)

(Well, Breakdown ended up spending the night in my room in holoform, though Knock Out wasn't happy and insisted on staying in there too.)

(I didn't know whether to feel loved or creeped out.)

(Onto what Soundwave and Starscream did with their upgraded holoforms...)

(Soundwave watched me while I was fooling around with the twins. He only watched when it was me and Frenzy or me and both of the twins. But when it was just me and Rumble, he'd step in between us and drag me off to some remote corner of the ship.)

(Starscream decided it would be funny to test out some pick-up lines he found on the internet on me. I ignored him for a while, mostly because Knock Out would try to tear Screamer to pieces if he thought I was even the slightest bit interested. Then at one point, when he asked if I wanted to go on a flight alone with him, I decided to see what he'd do if I replied, "Sure, what time?" His expression was priceless. He was only teasing me, and Knock Out, of course. I don't think he expected me to respond like that. And Knock Out's expression was priceless, too. But I didn't get to enjoy any of it because KO immediately locked me in my room with his and Breaky's holoforms. They were both very angry at me for daring to even tease Starscream back like that.)

(Since then, I've learned to live without too much human interaction. I never want to go through that again.)

Rule # 177: Troll-lo-lo-lo-lo. It's not even funny once. (By NothingSoSpecial)

(Rumble, Frenzy, and I hadn't trolled anyone before, so we needed to do it to see if it was worth doing more than once.)

(Dumbly, the 'con we chose to do it to was Bucket-head himself.)

(Rumble and Frenzy now have cells with their names carved into the doors, too.)

Rule # 178: Guess what! Don't believe everything you see, especially if your source is a video game. (By WingedWolfAlari)

(I had just finished Transformers Prime: the Game and started to wonder if there really was an asteroid made entirely out of Dark Energon and a giant Decepticon named Thunderwing trapped inside it. So I consulted Lord Megatron about it.)

(He was unsure, but asked Soundwave to check his records anyways. It turned out there was nothing in the database about such a thing.)

(I muttered something about the fact it would have been a huge asset for the Decepticon cause and probably would have brought us that much closer to snuffing Prime's spark along with the rest of the Autobots.)

(Megatron picked me up rather gently, ruffled my hair with the tip of one of his digits, and set me back down. It was the first time he had ever touched me that wasn't to yell at me or hadn't ended up in a visit to the medical bay.)

(I really need to ask Knock Out - anyone, for that matter - why Lord Megatron did that. The information I brought to his attention was completely wrong.)

(Last time I ever trust a video game.)

Rule # 179: Silas and MECH have a special place in the Decepticon history since coming to Earth, more for Breakdown than anyone else. Try to remember it. (By WingedWolfAlari)

(First it was when Breakdown got his optic ripped out. Then it was when Airachnid teamed up with them to go after the two-wheeler. Then it was when they stole Screamer's T-cog in the short while our favorite stiletto-heeled Seeker went rogue. Then it was when they tried to steal Breakdown's body after Airachnid - may she be found and eaten by scraplets - tore him to pieces. Luckily, as I said before, we were able to gather all his parts and put him back together because his spark was still intact.)

(As for my feelings towards MECH in general... The Pit for all of 'em, but Silas gets torture by way of Knock Out.)

(Nobody, I mean nobody, lays a finger on Patchy and gets away with it.)

(So if I ever meet Silas... he better be prepared to get beat by a girl.)

Rule # 180: The Harlem Shake is allowed, but only one time. (By WingedWolfAlari and inkdragon13)

(I saw a video of this on Youtube and immediately thought the 'cons should do one. So I gathered enough Vehicons to participate alongside Knock Out, Breakdown, Rumble, and Frenzy while I directed and Soundwave recorded it.)

(It was fun to watch, fun to direct, and according to Knock Out, fun to be in.)

(But the word 'fun' is not exactly in Lord Megatron's vocabulary.)

(Knock Out was confined to the medical bay, Breakdown was assigned to assist the miners down on the surface for two weeks, Rumble and Frenzy were essentially on house-arrest in their quarters, the Vehicons that participated got a severe dressing-down and a few nasty wounds as punishment, Soundwave got a figurative slap on the wrist for participating, and I got rec-room duty for two months and brig time.)

(Yeah, real fair punishments there, Megzy.)

AN: To get some ideas for Rule 176, I actually went on Deviantart and looked up humanized versions of the TFP 'cons. Well, all of them except for Megatron, Airachnid, Hardshell, and the Vehicons. My favorite artist for any humanized transformers no matter the generation is Lecidre, who also has a FF account.

Speaking of Rule 176, it's probably the longest one to date.