A/N: Hello readers! This is my first story. I've wanted more Prentiss/Mendoza stories for a while, so I decided to take matters into my own hands.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, story lines, etc. of Criminal Minds. Just a fan writing a story.
"What I want is you." Andrew states as he reaches for my hand. "I want us. But right now, it feels like you're pulling away."
I can't deny that, so I say nothing, keeping my head down.
"Are we breaking up?" He whispers.
"No." I respond immediately, my eyes lifting to find his. "That's not what I want."
"Then what do you want? Tell me. I'll do it." It's breaking him not to know what's going on in my head, I can tell.
"I know I've been pulling away and we do need to talk. I can't do this here though, not when I have to walk back on that door and focus on the case." He sighs, clearly disappointed but nods his head and pulls me into a hug.
"I do love you." I utter against his chest. He pulls back just enough to look at my face before leaning in for a kiss. I let it linger, trying to pour every ounce of love into it. I may be scared as hell and I may not be able to give him the verbal reassurance he wants just yet, but I'm trying to be hopeful that we'll make it through this.
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"I do understand. I know what it's like to have someone you love stuck in another world. Wanting one thing. Having another, but really having neither. Afraid to face the truth. But Kyle, you have to face the truth."
I may have been trying to talk down the subject, but I'd be lying if I didn't think my subconscious was talking to myself.
Three hours later the team was finished with the preliminary paperwork and headed to the jet to fly home. I, on the other hand, was headed to Andrew's house. It was time to face the truth and have a conversation. To tell him my hopes as well as my fears.
Knocking on his front door I quickly questioned my decision not to call ahead. I could hear him talking to someone on the other side.
"Hey!" He greeted in surprise as he opened the door. "I thought you left."
"The team did, but I wasn't quite ready to leave. I was hoping we could have dinner, but I can hear you have guests."
"It's just Keely and I. We were about to sit down to dinner."
"Of course. I didn't mean to intrude, I'm sorry." Internally I'm kicking myself. Of course, his daughter would be here, that's why he moved to Denver in the first place. I start to turn around, ready to leave.
"Wait," He reaches for my hand to stop me. "I'd really like it if you joined us."
I smile, turning back around fully. "I'd love that."
He moves to the side to allow me entrance into the house. As I glance around, I am overcome with a sense of comfort. The house is warm and inviting, the living room simplistic with a plush tan couch and wooden coffee table covered in textbooks. The first clear sign of Keely's presence in the house.
Andrew leads me into the dining room, pulling out an extra plate and silverware set as he explains that Keely went to change out of her practice clothes and will be down in a moment. I nod, staring off into space a bit. Despite the face that fact that Andrew and I have been dating for over a year, I have yet to meet Keely. When Andrew was in DC, Keely was already in Denver with her mom. Andrew finally got a transfer a few months ago and this is the first I've been to Denver since then.
The sound of footsteps coming down the stairs bring me back to the present. Keely steps into the room, moving in front of Andrew as he beckons her over. Setting his hands on her shoulders he introduces us.
"Emily, this is Keely. Keely, Emily." He gestures to me. Keely's smile is bright as she reaches a hand out in greeting.
"It's nice to meet you, Keely. Your dad has told me so much about you." I shake her hand, my nerves disappearing.
"Likewise." She looks me up and down, then tilts her head up at her father. "Wow dad, you did not oversell it."
"Keely." Andrew raises an eyebrow, his tone half warning half playful.
"What?!" Keely smirks as she rounds the table to take her place.
I laugh and give Andrew a grin as he pulls a chair out for me to sit. I reach for his hand as he takes the seat next to me, squeezing lightly in hopes of conveying a sense of peace. We still have yet to talk, but the night is already off to a good start and I'm hopeful it will continue.
####
Dinner did, in fact, remain wonderful. Keely was sweet, funny and intelligent. She expressed no hesitancy or dismay at the idea of getting to know me. In fact, she invited me to come to her tennis match with Andrew the next morning if I planned to still be in town.
Once Keely was in bed, Andrew led me over to the sofa, pulling me against his side.
"That went ok, I think."
"Better than ok, she loved you." Andrew stated as he flipped a blanket over our laps.
I laid my head against his shoulder. "I missed you."
"I missed you, too." He took a deep breath. "Not that I want to ruin a great evening, but can we please talk about whatever has been bothering you?"
"I'm scared." I whisper.
"Scared of what, love?" His fingers start slowly running up and down my arm, over my sweater, in a move to comfort me.
"How much I love you. I haven't let myself get this close to someone in a long time. I'm scared because the thought of quitting my job to be here with you isn't scary, and I feel like it should be. I've put in a lot of work to get to where I am now and I love the BAU and the team." Already I am getting teary eyed and I haven't even confessed my biggest fear.
"Hey, shh." Andrew's voice is soothing. "If you aren't ready to leave the BAU yet, you don't have to. Yes, I want you here, but I would never ask you to do something you don't want. We can make this work."
But I do want to, I think to myself. "Andrew I…" I pause, taking a deep breath. Here goes nothing. "I'm pregnant."
His fingers stop moving on my arm, so I pull back to look at this face. I'm prepared for the worst. We didn't plan on this. In fact, I was on birth control to prevent this and Andrew knows that.
"Say that again?" He whispers, his face void of any emotion.
"I'm pregnant." I swallow, searching his eyes, his face for anything to show how he feels. I'm a profiler for heaven's sake but I can't tell a damn thing.
Suddenly, he's beaming. He places a hand on my stomach, looking down and rubbing lightly. "We're having a baby?"
"Mmhmm." I manage, unable to articulate anything more. How is he so happy? I've been terrified since the day I found out two weeks ago.
He looks back up at me and senses my hesitancy. His brow furrows. "You're not happy about this?"
"Andrew, I'm 42. I've always wanted to be a mother, but I accepted years ago that it wasn't in the cards for me. Now, there is an increased chance of premature birth, chromosomal defects, miscarry…" My words are cut off with a kiss, Andrew placing his hands on each side of my face. We rest our foreheads against one another as we pull apart.
"I'm terrified." My voice cracks, emotions and hormones running high.
"I won't say that your fears aren't valid, but we will face those if and when the time comes. But God, Em, we're having a baby."
I can feel him smile, pulling back to look at his face. I can't deny his happiness is contagious. "We're having a baby," I confirm, nodding and smiling lightly.
"We're having a baby." He whispers one last time before pulling me into a hard, deep kiss. It's all I can do to keep from moaning. The distance between us has been so big the past couple weeks, literally and figuratively, and even though I built that rift, I still missed him. Now that everything is out, I just want him. His tongue slips past my lips and I savor the taste and feel of him.
He pulls me across his lap so I am straddling him and my desire increases tenfold as I can feel him hard and ready. "Keely?" I inquire breathlessly as we pull apart for air.
"Her bedroom is upstairs, mine is right there." He points to a cutout in the room where a door is pulled almost fully closed. "She also sleeps like a log."
I bite my lip in a smile, crawling off his lap and letting him take my hand to lead me towards his room.