Blue

by Lady of the Spirit

Destiny's a funny thing, isn't it? You can't control it.Take my life for example.One moment, I'm living a perfect life with my dad in the Fire Nation. The next thing I know,it's 2 years later, I'm friends with the Avatar,and my friends and I are on the run from the hotheaded Prince of my own Nation. Oh, and did I mention I can bend two opposite elements?

42. I'll Do Better

Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar the Last Airbender or any characters thereof. Nickelodeon, and Mike and Bryan the proud owners of the fantastic show, while I am just writing this for my own amusement. I only own my own characters, and/or any plot twists that are caused because of them.

I'll Do Better

I didn't hate Zuko.

I knew my friends hated him, and for good reasons. I knew he wasn't the nicest person, and he didn't seem to care about the damage the Fire Nation had done under his father and grandfather's orders, and he wanted to capture Aang, and he wanted the Fire Nation to win the war, and he was rather stuck up. I knew all of these things.

But I still didn't hate Zuko. I had every right to hate him, considering everything that he had done. But I didn't hate him. Maybe it was because I knew why he was trying to capture Aang, and even if it was for selfish reasons, I could sympathize with him - all he wanted was to go home and for his life to go back to normal and show his father he wasn't a coward or worthless. Maybe it was because he had indirectly helped me get back to my friends. Maybe it was because he had protected me from June's shirshu instead of allowing me to be paralyzed, therefore allowing me to rejoin my friends (and I did somewhat regret leaving him the way I had). Maybe it was because, despite what it seemed, he valued his men's lives over Aang's capture. Maybe it was because we worked well together as the Blue Spirit and the Mononoke, or his skill with his sword impressed me, or that he hadn't left me for Zhao to capture when I was unconscious and had instead let Aang escape to save me. Maybe it was because of that night when we danced, and we had had that small talk, and he had apologized to me. I didn't hate him. We were something almost close to friends (or at least, I thought so), and I didn't want to hate him.

So when I learned that Zuko had successfully captured a defenceless Aang and dragged him out into a raging blizzard, I didn't know exactly how to feel.

Because on one hand, it was Aang. My friend, a twelve-year old kid with the weight of the world on his shoulders. He was, despite everything, still innocent and so happy all the time and thinking about him in a Fire Nation prison or worse filled me with a rage I couldn't describe.

But on the other hand, I knew Zuko. I knew he wasn't like Zhao. He would capture and imprison Aang, but he wouldn't actually harm him. Despite what he thought, I knew he had more honour than that. But he had brought Aang into a raging blizzard, and while that should have infuriated me, the utter stupidity of his actions seemed to shock me to the point that it neutralized my fury.

I mean, I didn't know how many options he had, but Agni damn it, Zuko, there had to be a better option!

"I hate this!"

Katara, whose head rested on my shoulder, didn't react to my outburst. Sokka looked back at me briefly, before turning back to the front. It was too dangerous in the weather we were in to not be completely focused on what Appa was flying into. Yue looked a little caught off guard by my outburst but looked at me sympathetically. "We'll find him soon, Tora." She said, reaching over and putting her hand on my shoulder.

"How could we possibly find him soon in this weather?" I snapped. I knew it wasn't fair to take my anger out on Yue because she hadn't done anything, but she was the only one who had reacted to my statement. As we were all too worried about Aang to do anything than search for him and Zuko from Appa's saddle, no one had said a word since we had started searching. Not until I couldn't take the silence of my friends, the roar of the wind, and the tenseness in the air any longer.

I couldn't even use my fire as a light to help us search, because the wind was making it too dangerous. My fire would, at best, extinguish immediately, and, at worst, would go out of control and hurt one of us. Control of the fire depended on the strength of the bender but also the elements around them - I had control, now, more than before, but it meant nothing in the storm. The one power I had that would have been slightly useful in this situation, and I couldn't even use it.

"It's dark! We can barely see the ground, and what we can see is covered in snow and completely shapeless! I can't use my fire because I could lose control of it and one of us could get hurt!" I yelled, not at Yue specifically, but just at everyone and everything. "We don't know what direction Zuko went in, and we don't know where he is! We don't even know if Aang has come back from the Spirit World yet! Meanwhile, the Fire Nation is attacking the Water Tribe and we have no idea how to stop them! I - HATE-" I paused, searching my mind for something specifically to hate, but I could come up with nothing. "EVERYTHING!"

"Tora!" Sokka yelled, spinning in his seat to glare at me.

"What?!"

"I know you're worried! We all know you're worried! We're worried too! We're in the middle of nowhere and we have no light and no damn clue where we should go! But you yelling about how much you hate everything is not helpful at all right now and is just making everyone feel worse; so if you don't have anything helpful to say, keep your mouth shut and keep looking instead of yelling about how hopeless everything is!"

With another glare at me, Sokka turned back to the front. I glared at his back, ready to start shouting back at him, but my mouth fell shut as soon as it had opened when I realised he was right. I was contributing literally nothing to our search except bitterness and hopelessness. We didn't need any of my negativity to bring us down.

I swallowed. "I'm sorry."

Sokka didn't turn around, but some of the tension in his shoulders loosened.

I turned to the other girls. "To you both, too." Yue gave me a small smile, while Katara patted my hand gently.

"It's alright." Katara sighed. She sounded just as tired as I felt. "Let's keep looking."

I tried to think positive thoughts as we returned to our roles of searching the ground from the saddle, but I failed. I wouldn't voice my thoughts, of course, because the others didn't need me to voice my negativity any more than I already had, but whether or not I said it aloud made no difference. We all knew it would take a miracle to find Aang.

~~Water~~

It was his uncle who Zuko thought of as he blew fire into his hands. The old man was never far from Zuko's thoughts; Iroh was always somewhere in his mind, however faint of a thought he was. It would be hard not to think of him, though, in the situation Zuko was in. It was Iroh who had taught him the breath of fire, and it was what was keeping Zuko warm enough to keep going through the blizzard.

He wondered if Iroh hadn't come with him when he had been banished, whether or not he would have learned the breath of fire on his own. That lead to wondering what he would have done in this situation without the breath of fire. Would he have been able to keep moving through sheer willpower alone? Would he have learned another way of keeping warm in the cold? Or would he have never learned any technique for keeping warm, and eventually died in the cold, his body never found, never to return home?

He knew which scenario his father would bet on.

Zuko stared at the fire burning in his hands. I wonder how Tora survived. He mused. She had experienced the cold of the South Pole for two years, and from what he had seen of her and her firebending, she definitely had not had someone like Iroh to teach her the breath of fire. Of course, she had had friends to help her through the cold and had time to adjust to it, so perhaps she had learned to heat herself up by herself. But he, he had to be taught, and he hadn't had anyone other than his uncle.

He had a master to train him, and so he learned. Tora had nobody but herself, and still, she had managed to figure it out.

It made him bitter. A novice like she picked up something like breath of fire without anyone to teach her. He had to be taught and trained and drilled over and over again until he got it. She's just like Azula. She might not be a master yet, but she only needs some training and she'd be perfect.

He glanced over at the Avatar. The boy was still unconscious, and his tattoo's still glowed that eerie blue light. The sight of the tattoos made him feel even more bitter. The boy was only twelve, and yet he had been called a master of airbending. He's like Azula, too. And the waterbending girl - Katara or something, he thought Tora had called her once when she had still been on his ship - she had become far better at waterbending since the last time he had fought her, which had been little over a month ago.

He stood, and headed for the mouth of the cave, staring out over the endless wasteland of snow and ice. "I finally have you," he muttered, "but I can't get us out of here because of this blizzard. There always has to be something. Not that you would understand," he added with a glance over his shoulder. He wasn't sure why he was talking to the Avatar when he was still unconscious. Perhaps just to fill the silence, or to get his thoughts out in the open without anyone actually hearing him.

"You, you're just like my sister. You and your friends, too. Everything comes so easy to her. Everything. She's always been like that; she's a prodigy, and everyone adores her." He crossed his arms, his shoulders growing tenser. "You know what my father says? He says Azula was born lucky. He says I was lucky to be born. But I don't need luck, and I don't want it. I've always had to struggle and fight and that's made me strong. It's made me who I am."

~~Water~~

Why is it always like this?

We had been searching for what felt like hours, and there was still no sign of Aang or Zuko or really anything besides snow and ice. Katara's shoulders were slumping, Sokka was rigid and tense, Yue was relaxed and calm, and I was quiet. There was nothing positive I could say, so I said nothing at all.

"Any of you see anything yet?" Sokka asked without turning around.

"No." Katara sounded exhausted.

"Nothing," Yue said, sounding apologetic.

"If we had seen something, we would have said something already," I snapped at him, the words escaping before I could stop them. I pursed my lips as soon as I said it, looking back down at the ground.

"Tora…" Yue sighed.

"I know, I know…" I muttered, not looking at her.

"It's true, though." I heard Katara say under her breath, and I resisted the urge to smile slightly. I shouldn't be smiling, I scolded myself, not now.

"If there's one thing we can count on," Yue said, "it's that Prince Zuko won't be getting far in this weather."

See, now, why can't I say thing like that, instead of bitter comments that don't help anybody?

"I'm not worried about them getting away in this blizzard. I'm worried they won't." Katara said, and she sounded so devoid of hope it made me feel even worse than I already did. I felt horrible, for Aang, for Katara, for Zuko, for all of us. If Katara was losing hope then this was worse than I had thought.

"They're not going to die in this blizzard," Sokka said harshly. Katara looked startled at her brother's tone. "If we know anything about Zuko, we know he's never going to give up. We will find him, eventually, so don't you give up, alright?"

Katara closed her eyes and let out a long sigh. She breathed in deeply, and then opened her eyes, looking more determined than ever. "You're right." She said, and I couldn't help but smile as I saw the hope returning to her eyes.

"Zuko's definitely not the sort of person to die like this." I sighed, shaking my head. "And he's not going to let Aang die on his watch, either."

"Sokka told me you were captured by Prince Zuko for some time," Yue said, turning to me. "Do you know him well, then? You sound like you do."

"I wouldn't say I know him well," I said slowly, eyes still scanning the frozen ground beneath us, "but I do know him. I know him enough to know he won't let Aang die, if that's any help."

"Oh, no, he just dragged Aang off into a blizzard and plans to take him to the Fire Lord." Katara scoffed. "He's practically harmless."

"I never said he was harmless, Katara," I snapped, glaring at her over my shoulder, "just that he won't kill Aang. Besides, I'd rather hand Aang over to Zuko than to Zhao." I'd rather not hand Aang over to either of them, but if I had to, I would choose Zuko over Zhao any day of the week.

"Yeah, cause that says a lot." Sokka snorted. "Hand him over to an evil, stuck up, ruthless prince, instead of an evil, hotheaded Admiral. Look, it doesn't matter which one has him, it just matters that either way, Aang is headed straight for the Fire Lord, and then we're all doomed."

"I know that! I was just saying-"

"The blizzard seems to be calming down," Yue pointed out, raising her voice to be heard over me. Her remark, however casual it was, still served its purpose - I stopped talking.

I knew it didn't matter to them, but it mattered to me. I knew Zuko better than they did, and I knew why he was doing what he was doing. I saw Zuko as something close to a friend. I was fond of him. I knew he was better than Zhao, and so did my friends, but they didn't care. I cared. I cared too much, more than I should have, but I tried not to dwell on this for too long. The blizzard was calming down, slowly but surely. None of us spoke a word.

Eventually, the wind died down completely, and the snowing stopped. All was quiet. Far too quiet for any of us to be completely relaxed. The moon was high and full, and it gave us the light we needed.

It was actually the moon's light that reminded me. I pulled my hands out of my armpits (where I had been keeping them to refrain from creating a fire blast when my irritation with the whole situation reached its limit) and blew a steady stream of fire into my hands. After a moment of enjoying the external warmth for myself, I extinguished it, then maneuvered myself into the small space between Katara and Yue. They moved so I could fit in between them, and once I was comfortable, I raised my hands again, and a small fire appeared in my palms. Yue leaned in closer, sighing softly in relief as the warmth washed over her. I gave her a smile, which she returned, but when I turned to Katara, my smile dropped.

My friend was staring at the fire in my hands with an expression I couldn't read exactly, but her lips were pursed and her big blue eyes were narrowed slightly. She glanced at me. Something in my face must have told her I was upset, because she leaned in closer like Yue had and stopped looking at my fire with the look she had had before. I looked down at my fire myself, flexing my fingers and letting a small flame flicker around my fingertips.

You can drown in water. I reminded myself. You can be crushed in landslides. Fire is not the only dangerous element.

A flash of blue in the corner of my eye yanked me out of these thoughts. I looked up at the sky and saw it - a ball of bright blue light, streaking across the sky like a comet. "Are you seeing that?" I yelled, pointing at the light.

"What is that?" Katara demanded.

"What?" Sokka asked, staring in the direction I was pointing with squinted eyes. "What is it?"

"It's a blue light - can't you see it?" Katara's eyes widened. "It's gotta be- follow it! It's Aang!"

Sokka snapped Appa's reins, and immediately we were turning to the left, following the light only Katara and I could see.

"What is it?" Yue cried, looking from Katara, to Sokka, to me desperately. "Why are we following it?"

"It's a blue light!" Katara spoke quickly, leaning so far forward I was worried she would fall out of the saddle. "It must be Aang's spirit trying to find his body, and if we follow it we'll find him!"

I closed my fist over the flame, extinguishing it. We followed the light as fast as we could, Appa seeming to strain himself to fly faster, almost as though he knew if he flew faster we would get to his master quicker. We were led over more of the endless field of snow and ice, not any more recognizable than the rest of it, but now we had hope that we would actually find something eventually. The light, now far ahead of us, arched downwards to the ground, then vanished. "There!" I shouted, leaning over the edge of the saddle (so far over Katara had to grab my collar to keep me from falling out, my legs were basically all that were in the saddle) and pointing towards the area the light had gone. We were so close.

If I squinted and stared hard enough, I could see a small blur of orange wriggling against the ground, a stark contrast to the greyish white of the snow. "I found him!"

I could hear Aang yell Appa's name as we flew down to the ground. He was bound, ropes tied around his legs and arms, and Zuko held him by the collar, lifting him off the ground. Katara was the first to leap down from Appa's back as soon as we were on the ground, arms raised and already posed to take Zuko on.

Zuko dropped Aang off to the side and raised his hands, taking a battle stance. "Here for a rematch?" He sneered at Katara, who remained cold and tranquil.

"Trust me, Zuko," Katara said coldly, "It won't be much of a match." A fireball was thrown at her, and she raised a sheet of snow to absorb the blast. She didn't even flinch. She sent a wave of ice towards him, encasing him, raised him into a tower of ice, and dropped him, all in one move. Zuko was unconscious as soon as he hit the ground, half buried in a pile of snow.

I jumped down, scrambling to get to Aang, and Sokka followed close behind. "He didn't hurt you, did he?" I asked him, cutting through his bonds with my sword. I knew Zuko wouldn't hurt Aang, but knowing he wouldn't and actually hearing Aang say Zuko hadn't hurt him were different things, and it was something I couldn't leave unsaid.

"No, I'm okay," Aang answered, shaking his hands as soon as they were free. "Not even a rope burn."

I breathed out in relief. I clapped a hand on Aang's shoulder and squeezed it gently before I stood and headed over to Zuko's motionless form. I knelt down, sheathing my sword as I did so, and put two fingers against his neck, just to make sure he was alright. The gentle thumping of his heart beating assured me he was fine. I examined his face, studying the cuts and the black eye he had on his good eye. They were fresh, by the looks of them. They hadn't even had a chance to heal properly. What had happened to him? And what had happened to Iroh?

Behind me, Sokka commented on the quality of the rope Aang's bindings had been made of, sounding too excited about it. Aang quickly told us we needed to get back to the oasis as soon as possible. The Spirits were in danger. What Spirits were in danger, or what danger they were in, he didn't say, but there was no time to lose, asking questions like that. They could wait until we were in the air. I pulled Zuko's body up, placed his arm around my shoulder and my arm around his waist. I was able to pull him to his feet, although his head lolled and he was too heavy.

"Tora, what are you doing?" Katara asked me. I looked up at my friends; they were all staring at me from Appa's saddle, showing no signs of coming down to help me carry Zuko. Rather, they were staring at me like I was insane.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" I demanded. "We're bringing him with us." They didn't move. I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach. They weren't - they couldn't... "We're - we're not going to leave him here." I swallowed. "He'll die if we leave him here."

"That's kind of the idea," Sokka said dryly. "Now come on, drop princey and get up here."

I felt sick. They had every intention of letting Zuko die here. I knew he was a jerk, which was putting it mildly, and he had chased us to the ends of the earth, literally, but he was still a person. And he was my friend, kind of. I liked him. Leaving him to die was not something I could allow myself to do.

What if they leave me here with him? The darker side of my mind whispered. If I'm going to pretend like he's the good guy, I'm not going to be much help fighting against him, am I? I'd be useless to them.

I breathed out, harder than normal, feeling like I had been punched in the stomach. My friends would never do that. "I'm not leaving him here," I said, my voice coming out more strained than I had meant it to.

I scanned my friends faces, looking for some hint, any hint, even the smallest hint they would give in. I knew I was asking a lot from them. I knew they had every reason to disagree, to make me leave him behind. But I would do everything I could to convince them to just trust me. I thought of Iroh's face if he were ever to find out I had left his nephew to die. I thought of what I would do if I left Zuko to die. If I left Zuko here, I would regret it for the rest of my life.

Katara looked at me with barely hidden annoyance. Sokka looked like he didn't know who I was. Yue - well, she didn't know Zuko, she just knew what we had told her, but she was glancing around at the others, looking for a signal from them to tell her what to do about this. Aang was the only one who had any sympathy. I could tell from the look in his eyes he agreed with me.

And when he voiced his agreement, I nearly collapsed to my knees - it would have been partly out of relief, and partly because Zuko was nothing but dead weight and the ground was uneven underneath all of the snow. Aang jumped down from Appa's head and swung Zuko's other arm under his shoulders, helping me carry him up to the saddle.

As the two of us carried him up, I whispered to Aang, "Thank you."

Aang looked at me and smiled. "Don't worry about it."

But I had worried about it, I had worried I was going to be abandoned again because I wouldn't let Zuko die, I had worried my friends were so horrible that they would actually abandon me. I felt sick again, but this time it wasn't because of my friends, it was because of my own traitorous mind.

They didn't, I thought. They didn't leave me. I inhaled. I needed to remember that.

As I tied Zuko's wrists behind his back (because I wasn't stupid, I wasn't going to let him be completely free), I felt Katara and Sokka's eyes on me. "Yeah, let's bring the guy who's constantly trying to kill us," Sokka said. "Because that makes so much sense."

"I'm not going to just let him die, Sokka," I said sharply, scooting into my own area of the saddle, leaning up against it in an "I don't give a crap" way.

"It would save us a lot of trouble," he muttered. I wasn't sure if I was meant to hear it or not, but he didn't bother to make sure I wouldn't.

"Maybe it would, but that doesn't matter, Aang and I decided to save him, it's done. Let's drop it."

Sokka dropped it. Katara, who had never said anything about my decision, continued to say nothing, but she kept glancing at me. I pretended not to notice, looking out across the wasteland instead, as though I hadn't stared at it enough already as we had been searching for Aang.

Between us, there was no sound, just tense silence. I found myself clutching my sword hilt tighter than normal, scraping my fingernails against the metal. I refused to look at any of them. The moon had appeared as the storm clouds passed, and I found myself staring up at that instead.

Aang was the first to crack under the weight of the silence. "How long did it take you to get to where I was?" He asked.

"A while," Katara answered him. "Most of the day - but," she added quickly, and I presumed it was because Aang had looked back at her in panic, "we spent most of that time looking for you, once we knew where you were it didn't take very long."

"That's good," he said in relief. "We need to get back to the oasis as quick as possible."

"What sort of danger are the Spirits in?" I asked.

I received my answer not from Aang, but from the sky, as though my question had triggered a response.

The moon went red. I watched as red crawled over the moon and the soft light it gave off became dark and blood red, like how a sheet, when passed over a light, bathes the room in colour. But it wasn't like that - it was wrong, and I could feel ice in my stomach.

Yue held her hands to her temples, moaning softly in pain. Sokka leaned over and placed a hand on her shoulder, asking her (with the softest voice he had ever used in his life) if she was alright.

"I feel faint," Yue said weakly.

"I feel it too," Aang muttered, his face scrunched up in pain. "The Moon Spirit is in trouble." He snapped Appa's reins, urging the bison to go as fast as possible.

I looked uneasily at the red moon. My friends and I had faced a lot, and obviously, we were going to do whatever we could to keep the Moon Spirit safe, but if something could endanger a Spirit… what could it do to us?

Before I thought better of it, I scooted myself out of my corner and over to Katara. She didn't react, which I thought was better than any other reaction.

"I owe the Moon Spirit my life," Yue said, almost in a whisper, as though she were reminding herself instead of telling us.

"What do you mean?" Sokka asked gently.

Yue told us what she meant. When she had been born, she told us, she had been born silent, eyes closed, as though she had been asleep. She had been very weak, and despite the great efforts of the healers, they had told her parents she would die. Her father had pleaded with the Spirits to save his daughter, and, under the advice of Umi, had placed Yue into the pond of the oasis under the full moon. Her hair had turned white, she had opened her eyes, and she had begun to cry.

"They knew then, that I would live," Yue finished softly. "That's why my mother named me Yue, for the moon."

We had all listened to her story, and none of us dared to speak. Sokka was staring at her with an expression I had never seen on his face before, and I couldn't recognize what it was.

"We're going to save the moon," I said. "We're going to end this battle."

We weren't going to save the world. Not yet. But we would save today.

~~Water~~

We arrived at the oasis to find Zhao with an entourage of soldiers behind him. Zhao stood by the pool where Aang had been sitting only hours before, in the midst of a power-fueled speech. He basked in the light of the moon, one arm held to the sky, holding in his fist a wriggling bag as though he were making an offering to the moon. The soldiers, all with their faces hidden by the skull masks of their helmets, stood behind him, silent and still as soldiers were meant to stand.

I felt a chill go down my spine at the sight of their skull faces in the blood red light. They didn't look anything close to human.

"They will call me Zhao the Conqueror! Zhao the Moonslayer! Zhao the Invincible!" Zhao bellowed to the sky, too devoted to his mighty speech to notice us coming closer and closer to the ground.

Zhao the Invincible's speech was ruined as Momo leapt down from the gate and landed on Zhao's head, scrabbling at his face and chittering loudly, right into his ear. Zhao yelled, startled, and shouted at the soldiers behind him to get the lemur off of his face, his aura of superiority and dignity shattering quickly.

Momo had provided just the right amount of distraction. As Zhao and the soldiers were distracted in trying to extract him from Zhao's face, Appa was able to land and we were able to dismount without being noticed. Yue stayed in the saddle, watching us get into stances around Aang. Aang stood in the front, staff in his hands; Katara to his left, hands raised in a waterbending stance; Sokka at his right, boomerang held up menacingly; me to Sokka's right, one hand raised in a fist and the other hovering over my sword.

Momo flew off of Zhao's face and landed on Aang's outstretched arm. I did a quick survey - there were four of us, we had Aang and Katara, we had Sokka with his boomerang, we had me with both of my elements and my sword, all up against Zhao and his soldiers who were at their lowest strength under the moon. We had taken on larger groups than them before, and that had been before Katara, Aang and I had improved our bending.

"Don't bother." Zhao sneered at us and raised the wriggling bag again, raising his fist

"Zhao!" Aang's stance dropped and his hands rose in surrender as quickly as he could. "Don't do this."

Zhao was past the point of no return. His eyes gleamed feverishly, and he spoke like a crazed man. "It is my destiny to destroy the Moon Spirit and the Water Tribe!"

Zhao was dangerous enough when he was sane, if the word could be used to describe him. But now, on the cusp of glory and greatness and honour, he was even more unstable than he had proved himself to be in the past. Traces of flames were already flickering across his knuckles. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. He had gone mad with power, and that always made for a dangerous enemy. We could not afford to lose to him.

Aang continued to plead with him, trying to explain to Zhao what would happen if the moon was taken away. "It'll hurt everyone, not just the Water Tribe. That includes you, Zhao," he said softly. "Without the moon, everything would fall out of balance. You have no idea what kind of chaos that would unleash on the world."

"He is right, Zhao," a familiar old voice spoke up. I turned to look - Iroh was standing at the foot of one of the bridges crossing over to the oasis. It was only because of the seriousness of the situation I was able to stop myself from smiling at the sight of the old man.

Zhao sighed. "General Iroh," he said in a bored tone, "why am I not surprised to discover your treachery?"

"I am no traitor, Zhao," Iroh retorted, lowering his hood. He had no injuries, no burns or bruises or healing cuts that I could see - what had happened to Zuko? "The Fire Nation needs the moon, too. We all depend on the balance. Whatever you do to that Spirit, I will unleash ten-fold onto you! Let it go, now!"

I had never seen Iroh angry before. Now that I had, I knew I never wanted to be on the receiving end. He assumed a firebending stance pointed right at Zhao, his normally kind face twisted into a ferocious glare that promised no mercy if his thunderous tone had not been enough to convince Zhao he would fulfil his threat. Iroh was a general, and the Dragon of the West. He had laid siege to Ba Sing Se, the impenetrable city, for six hundred days and had even broken through the outer wall. He was a man to be feared, and yet his kindness somehow made you forget he was one of the most dangerous men you could ever meet.

Zhao seemed to struggle with himself for a moment before he sighed again. Not out of annoyance - this time he was resigned. He lowered himself to the ground on one knee, opened the bag, and the Moon Spirit was once again swimming in circles with the Ocean Spirit. The red light faded and the moon returned to normal. Everything was good.

I saw it in Zhao's face too late - the way his eyes burned with hatred, with rage, with his dreams of fame and honour to his name going up in flames, the way his face twisted with anger and murderous intent. He lashed out with a feral roar, an arc of vibrant orange fire lighting up the night, cutting through the air and across the surface of the pond.

I lunged for the front of the group without thinking. I cut through it, absorbing the flames into my skin, and spread my arms out, splitting the fire in half and away from my friends.

Then the moon went out.

I felt it leave me. Not the moon, but the power within me. I felt it go, vanish, leaving me feeling like there was a gaping hole somewhere inside me where my waterbending had once been. I heard Katara give a pained gasp, and I knew she felt it too.

Our waterbending, everybody's waterbending, was gone forever.

Iroh attacked. He attacked without mercy, just as he had promised, sending blast after blast of fire at Zhao and his soldiers. Zhao ducked in between his soldiers, probably hoping for them to take care of Iroh for him - but Iroh took each of them down as easily as he could have taken down one man, each flame he created casting light across the oasis. Zhao fled, no doubt realizing the danger he would be in if he stayed, but none of us tried to stop him as he ran for the door.

I think we were all in shock, too shocked that someone could do something so… so evil, too shocked to stop Zhao and make him pay for everything he had done.

Iroh knelt by the pond. I feared, for a moment, that one of my friends would try to stop him and another fight would break out, but no one said anything. In that moment of grief, we all forgot about the larger war outside of the North. We forgot who we were supposed to hate. My friends joined him, circling the pond to kneel by his side. Yue dashed past me, grabbing onto Sokka for support as soon as she reached him. I stayed where I was, on the other side of the pool, staring into the water, feeling the horrible emptiness inside me and feeling like I could not breathe, like there was a weight pressing down on my chest and I could not take in any air, I could only let it out. The Ocean Spirit, the black koi with the spot of white on its head (Yin, I thought in the midst of my daze, just as the white koi had been Yang), swam frantically, still in circles but without the steady speed it had possessed before. Without its partner, it had no balance - it had the direction but none of the elegance. It was lost. The Moon Spirit's body bobbed at the surface of the water. Its once pristine white scales had been marred by a horrible burn extending across its back.

Iroh dipped his hands in the water, pulling the white koi out.

I stared at the water, where the black koi continued to swim aimlessly. Smoke curled off the surface of the water and the air smelled of burnt fish.

The emptiness inside me burned. It raged and it blossomed. Visions of fire danced before my eyes, and I inhaled as deep as I could to control myself. I could hear my blood pounding in my ears. Where there had been shock there was now anger.

My fists clenched. I could feel heat on my skin. I took another breath - and another, and another. I clenched my teeth together as tight as I could. I tried to focus - focus on my surroundings, what I could feel, what I could hear, and then I realized the sound of my heartbeat was drowned out by the sound of crackling fire.

I spun and I ran. No one called after me, to ask what I was doing, and I was glad for it. If they had, I would not have heard them - despite my efforts, I was still hearing nothing but the roar of a wildfire. I reached the door and I yanked it open, stepping through as fast as I could without tripping.

Don't lose control don't lose control don't don't don't

There was no other path than the one leading straight ahead. I sprinted forwards, towards the palace, controlling my breathing, taking one long steady breath before the next. I could not afford to lose control, not now, not now, not when there was so much that had to be done, I could not afford to snap and lash out. I did not know what would happen to anyone I crossed paths with if I snapped. I did not want to find out.

I wanted to find Zhao. I wanted - I needed to take him down, to hurt him, I needed to bring him to justice. He could not just get away with what he had done! We could not lose him just so he could return to wherever he came from and continue on making our lives miserable! I needed to find him, I needed to kill him-

No, no, not kill. Not -

I did not know what I would do if I did not kill him.

I did not know what would happen if he was not taken down permanently.

I did not want to think about it but I knew it was true, something had to be done.

I knew Zhao would not go through the palace, there was too much a risk of him running into someone, and I turned. I followed the path going around the palace. I saw a familiar face.

"Zuko?"

He had been ahead of me by only two or three metres. I had not seen him as I had been running towards the palace. I must have been running faster than I thought, and the possible reason for that was something I did not like. Stay in control. I could still hear the faint sound of a fire echoing in my ears; it was not a loud sound, but it was loud enough.

He slowed but didn't stop. He looked over his right shoulder and when he saw me, his eye (his good one) widened a fraction. "Tora."

"Zhao?"

"That way."

I knew we were both after the same man. He and I ran side by side, at the same speed, even our footsteps in sync. It had been a long time since we had worked together in any way, and I had almost missed it.

We ran to the edge of the tier. Zhao was on the tier below us, running across a bridge. I felt something in me burn when I saw him. It was not like a fire, it was something else entirely, it was like everything inside of me clenched up the moment I laid eyes on him. I raised my fist. It was wreathed in fire, the light casting warmth and an orange glow across the cold and dark space. Beside me, Zuko mirrored my action. We attacked at the same moment, with the same move. Our fire streamed through the air. The blast hit the ground right in front of Zhao, forcing him to come to a stop. We did not move. We waited for Zhao to look up and see us.

The smoke around us cleared. Zhao looked up and saw us. His eyes were drawn to Zuko. "You're alive?" He asked, incredulous for reasons I did not understand.

"You tried to have me killed!" Zuko roared, throwing a fire blast at Zhao. Had this information come at a different time, I would have paused to take it in. As it was, I joined Zuko in the fight with no hesitation. I punched, attacking with my own blast. Zhao rolled away before either of our attacks hit him. Together, Zuko and I leapt down from the tier to the edge of wall Zhao stood on. I struck the ground with a fireball before we landed, creating a large cloud of smoke to hide in. Zuko went to attack Zhao head on - I snuck up behind him on the edge of the wall he stood on. Neither of us could be seen until the smoke cleared, and when it did, we stood on either side of him, waiting.

Zhao stood with his feet pointed at the edge of the parapet. He looked to his left, where Zuko stood.

"Yes, I did," he said, confirming Zuko's accusation. "You are the Blue Spirit. You are an enemy of the Fire Nation. You freed the Avatar."

"And you killed the Moon Spirit!" I snarled, drawing Zhao's attention back to me. "You are the only enemy of the Fire Nation who stands here, Zhao!" Zhao gave me a look of utter disinterest, and as soon as he looked back at Zuko, Zuko sent volley after volley of fire blasts at him. Before the flames could touch him, Zhao turned, absorbing them and deflecting them with his hands held together before him. I reached out and took control of Zuko's fire as it was deflected from Zhao. I spun in a circle, swirling the flames around me like ribbons in a dance before flinging my hands forward and sending them back to Zhao.

He just barely managed to dodge my attack. He turned and lunged at me, punching fire at me for me to deflect. Zuko lunged, grabbing hold of Zhao's shoulders and flipping over him to land in between Zhao and me. I darted to the side as Zhao aimed a punch at Zuko's head. Zuko's wrist hit Zhao's, pushing it to the side and forcing his fire blast to go awry. I slipped around the two of them, dropped to the ground, and swung my leg, knocking Zhao's feet out from under him. As he twisted in a wild attempt to regain his balance, Zuko attacked his unguarded chest with a fiery blow. Zhao gave a pained yell as he fell to the tier below us. Zuko jumped down after him. I moved to follow, but a bright light in the darkness caught my eye. It came from the ocean. I looked up.

I did not know what it was at first. It stood tall, although it looked smaller than it must have been due to the distance between it and me. It was a luminescent blue-white, casting its odd light across the landscape. I could not see its front, but from behind it seemed to possess a dorsal fin. It had two long arms, so long they touched the surface of the ocean despite the creature's height. It grew out of the ocean like- like it itself was made from the water, made from the ocean.

It stood at the forefront of the Fire Nation fleet. It towered over the ships. It raised its arms skyward. It sliced through the tower of one of the ships.

I could not help the strangled sound that escaped me at the sight. No.

HE KILLED US

"Tora!"

I reacted instantly when I heard Zuko's shout and felt heat coming towards me. I threw my hands in front of me, splitting the flame like Zhao had done before. Zhao spun back to Zuko, seeing his surprise attack on me had failed. Casting another anxious glance back at the ocean creature, forcing all the voices of the dead out of my mind, I leapt down to the tier below. I took only a second to steady myself when I landed before I flipped in the air, flames bursting from the soles of my feet. Zuko, spotting my attack, swiftly pulled away from Zhao and pivoted on his heel. Zhao turned his head (to see what Zuko was trying to avoid) and then had to spin around entirely in time to just barely block my attack. He split my flame, curling it around his fists, and spun back to Zuko with a left-handed punch. Zuko pivoted again, this time to the right, and swung his wrist up to knock the punch off-center. (He's focusing on Zuko more than me, use that!) I kicked the back of Zhao's knee. It gave out.

Zhao had no balance. He was not steady on his feet like he should have been, like Zuko and I were. Take advantage of that.

Zhao fell, his knee hitting the ground. He twisted his upper body towards me, swinging his leg and left hand back, both spewing fire. I leapt up, avoiding the flame closer to the ground, and grabbed the other one. Zhao rolled across the ground and spun his legs towards Zuko's, hoping to knock him down like I had him. Zuko jumped and darted around him to where I was. I pulled the flames from Zhao around me and sent them back at him, breathing steadily and fanning the flames. They grew larger, hotter and brighter and hit the ground where Zhao had been only a second before he regained his footing.

Zuko and I exchanged a look. It's both of us against him, we need to keep him between us so he can't take both of us on at once, or we need to stay on the same side to double our attacks.

We looked forward again. "Together?" He muttered, moving into a stance.

"Together," I agreed, mirroring his position. "I'll go high, you go low." He grunted quietly, and together we lashed out. Zuko slid his foot forward, flames shooting across the ground. I punched, flames flying through the air. Zhao deflected my hit and absorbed Zuko's, throwing my attack back at us both. Zuko swivelled in front of me and split the flame, then ducked. I launched another blast over his head. Zhao was forced to take two steps back, hitting the edge of the tier. He looked down below. I knew we were in the city now, that we were fighting on someone's roof, and I knew there was nothing but an icy cold river and possibly a bridge below us. The bridges were spaced out so far apart, it was nothing but pure luck that there was a bridge below us.

He jumped backwards and disappeared from our view. We followed him.

Zhao threw a fireball at our feet as we landed. I threw up my arms and the fire flew away from us, spiralling up into the air and vanishing.

By pure chance, I looked up right as the moon reappeared in the sky.

It was like it had never been gone in the first place. It emerged from the grey, bringing back the true colour of the night sky - that beautiful dark blue - and bathing the world in its soft, pale light once more.

I felt the hole inside me, the one that had been empty since the moon had gone out, fill up again. I was complete once more.

Zuko darting past me made me focus. With the smallest of grins, I reached to my left side with both hands. I felt the water stirring as it fell under my control, savoured the feeling of pushing and pulling the water out of the canal below and up to me. I circled my arms around my head, pivoting on my foot, and formed a ring of whirling water over my head. I watched as Zuko punched and kicked a barrage of fireballs, forcing Zhao to stagger back. I threw my arm forward, sending the water gushing forwards and began to spin it around Zuko and Zhao. Zhao looked around wildly, staring in horror at my display of power. He looked up towards the moon, and his eyes grew wide in dismay. "It can't be!" He cried.

"You've failed, Zhao," I taunted. I pulled my arm back, arching it over my head, and pulled the water out of its ring. It crashed into Zhao's legs, sweeping him off his feet, and Zuko kicked one last perfect fireblast at his chest, sending him flying back several feet. Zhao fell to the ground with a cry and landed on his back, giving him a perfect view of his failure - his failure to defeat the Water Tribe, and his failure to defeat Zuko.

Everything was still - but only for a few seconds.

A hand - or what looked like a hand - formed of water, glowing blue-white, rose out of the canal on either side of the bridge. Long, spindly tendrils (fingers?) descended on the three of us. I stumbled backwards, out of its reach, while Zuko rolled out of the way, narrowly dodging it. I instinctively grabbed onto his arm and shoulder when he got back to his feet, holding him close. Zhao, on his knees as he struggled to get up, was not as lucky as the two of us. The hand grabbed Zhao in its fist and lifted him off the bridge. I felt Zuko grow even tenser.

Zhao fought to get free, yelling furiously as he twisted in the hand's grip. I ground my teeth, my shoulders rising and my grip on Zuko's arm tightening. Zhao was a monster. He had followed us, captured Aang and imprisoned him. He had launched the attack on the North and had killed the Moon Spirit. I couldn't think of anyone who deserved this more than him. He couldn't live, not after what he had done, and this wouldn't be me killing him, so it was alright.

But I still felt the urge to run and help him.

Zuko pulled out of my grip. He ran to the edge of the bridge, got up on the parapet and reached his hand out. "Take my hand!" He yelled to Zhao. I stood there, shaking and fists clenched, and I watched as Zhao reached out to accept Zuko's help. Their hands were so close to touching, Zuko just had to reach out a bit more…

But then Zhao's expression grew solemn and stony, and he pulled his hand back. Zuko's outstretched hand dropped back to his side. The hand pulled Zhao under the water. I didn't dare look over the bridge to see it happen.

Neither of us dared breathe as silence returned.

Finally, though, I took a few hesitant steps towards Zuko. He looked at me. We made eye contact. Something passed between us, although I wasn't sure what it was.

Zuko climbed down from the parapet and continued to look at the patch of water where Zhao had disappeared. I stood by his side, looking down as well.

"You-" My voice cracked. I licked my lips. "You did the right thing. Trying to help him."

Zuko didn't lift his head, but when I glanced at him, I saw he was looking at me out of the corner of his eye. I raised my hand. I hesitated for a moment, but then I placed it on his shoulder. He turned to look at me fully. He didn't say it, but I felt the way the tension bled out of him under my hand, and I saw in his eyes and the way his features smoothed out, that my words had taken some of the weight off of his shoulders. He nodded.

I examined his face, studying his cuts and his black eye and the burn on his cheek. "What happened to you? All of the-" I asked, gesturing to my own face rather than his.

Zuko reached up and traced over his black eye, wincing slightly as he touched it. "Zhao hired pirates to blow up my ship while I was on it."

My eyes widened. "That's how he tried to kill you?" He nodded. I breathed out. "But you didn't."

"I didn't," he agreed.

I raised my hand - hesitantly, since I wasn't sure he would let me touch him. When he made no objection to it, I touched his eye, the "good" one (since it wasn't exactly good at the moment). I avoided putting too much pressure on it, since he had winced under his own touch. He had nearly died. "I'm sorry," I said. "I'm not a healer. If I was, I would…"

Zuko blinked at me, looking startled. "It's - it's alright," he reassured me. "It won't be the first time I've had to heal normally."

"Still." I frowned. "I wish I could help."

We stayed like that for a moment longer, before we both realized what we were doing. Zuko tilted his head away from my hand, and I pulled my hand back to my side.

"It was you who convinced your friends to take me with them, wasn't it?" In response to Zuko's question, I blinked and then nodded. I supposed that out of all of them, I was the only one other than Aang who would have done so, and Aang wasn't the one standing in front of him. "Then you've helped me enough." He paused. He rubbed the back of his neck, looking almost embarrassed. "Thank you. For - you know."

"Saving your life, you mean?" I asked, a small smile on my lips. Zuko looked even more embarrassed at my question. "Consider it my payment for, you know, back then." We both knew what I was talking about (although back then my "payment" had been a kiss on the cheek, but I doubted he would do that to me).

I looked out across the city, to the sea, where the remains of the Fire Nation ships were. I hadn't watched the fight, but I hadn't needed to. Such a display of power could only have come from one person. "I can't believe he did all of this," I whispered.

"The Avatar?" Unlike so many times before, Zuko didn't sound like he was calculating a way to kidnap Aang. He just sounded tired. "That was him, wasn't it."

"He's the only one I know who could have done this," I said, sweeping my arm out to gesture at the wreckage. "And like that." I thought of the terrifying ocean thing rising out of the water, the glowing blue hand that had taken Zhao. I shuddered, glad I hadn't been on the receiving end of his wrath. The Avatar State, this version that I had never seen before, was something else, something terrifying and amazing and horrible and awesome.

"How many people were on those ships?" I asked myself.

"A lot. So many."

I had expected that answer, but that didn't make it hurt any less.

"Some of mine," Zuko whispered. "Zhao took them from me, before- well."

I thought of Katsu and Ryu and Jee and all of the other men I had met and befriended while a prisoner on his ship. I closed my eyes and bowed my head.

He had promised me he wouldn't hurt too many of them. He had promised me he wouldn't kill anyone.

Aang had promised me, but-

I swallowed. There was a lump in my throat. But there wasn't any other option. The army had infiltrated the city. They had broken into the Spirit Oasis. They had killed the Moon Spirit - Zhao had killed the Moon Spirit, but the others had stood and watched.

I thought of how their skull masks in the red light hadn't looked human, and I shuddered.

There hadn't been any stopping them. They would have kept going. They would have taken the Water Tribe.

I couldn't bring myself to feel angry with Aang. Yes, I was sorry for the loss of so many lives, the lives of my people - but there had been no other way to stop them.

"People are going to die," I admitted. "People have died. People are going to keep dying." Lives were going to be sacrificed to win the war. I couldn't bring myself to think that, before. After the massacre, when I had sobbed into Iroh's shoulder and wished the killing would stop. When I had Aang promise me he wouldn't harm or kill too many soldiers. I couldn't admit to myself that people were going to die on both sides, no matter what.

Zuko was quiet, but then he uttered a quiet, "Yeah."

I opened my eyes. "But," I said, "that doesn't mean I have to kill anyone."

I looked over at Zuko and found him watching me curiously. He nodded. "Yeah," he repeated.

"I'm sorry about your crew," I told him. My heart squeezed painfully as I thought about them, the men I had become friends with in a terrible situation.

"I'm sorry, too." Zuko looked away, across the city to the wreckage. "I know they were your friends."

"They were, but I didn't spend years sailing with them. Are you going to be alright?"

Zuko gave me the smallest of smiles. He winced slightly, but he still smiled at me. "I'll be fine. Don't worry about it."

"That's hard to do, knowing you," I scoffed. "I'm not with you for a couple of weeks, and the next time I see you, you've barely escaped an explosion. Typical Zuko." I smiled despite myself.

"You've gotten better," Zuko said. "Your bending. I can tell - you're stronger than before. You have more control."

My smile grew wider and I straightened up. "Thank you. I'm still working on it." I ran my hand through my hair. "It's paying off, though, I guess, since I was able to help you, with. Well. You know."

Zuko gave a short nod, his eyes flicking back to the edge of the bridge. I followed his gaze.

"Your father was wrong." The words fell out without my permission, but once they had I continued anyway, ignoring the way Zuko's eyes snapped right back to me. "Only a man with honour would try to save a man who had none." I looked back at him; Zuko was staring at me, his mouth open slightly. He stared at me like I had just told him I was giving him the entire world. No, it was more than that - he stared at me like my words had meant something to him, far more than I had thought they would.

His mouth opened more, like he was going to say something, but he was cut off.

"Zuko!"

We both turned - Iroh was jogging towards us, coming out of the building the bridge led to, his face alight with relief and love for his nephew. I heard Zuko exhale, whispering "Uncle." He stepped past me. Iroh came to a stop before Zuko and quickly embraced him in a tight hug. I noticed Zuko raising his hands slightly, like his own version of returning the hug, although Iroh's hug trapped his arms to his sides.

I smiled again, before looking down at the canal. I wondered if the rest of the world had experienced the loss of the moon like we had, if it affected the day as well as the night. I wondered if my father had seen it. I wondered if he knew, if he had received word from a member of the Society that I was with the Avatar. I wondered if he was worried-

No.

"Tora," I heard Iroh say. I looked up; Iroh had released Zuko from his hug, and now they both were looking at me. Iroh was smiling, while Zuko was back to his normal, neutral expression. "I am relieved to see you are safe as well. Thank you, for helping my nephew."

"No need for thanks," I said, raising my hands. "We helped each other." I could hear voices coming closer. They weren't ones I recognized - they must have been other members of the Water Tribe. "You two should get out of here, escape in all of the confusion. Can you get out on your own, or-?"

"I know a way out," Zuko interrupted.

"Good." I sighed. "I need to get back to my friends. I'm sure they're worried about me." I looked up at the moon. "And I need to find Aang and talk to him." I shot Zuko a look, but he didn't react to hearing the name. That was good. It meant we would have some time before he came after us again.

"Yes," Iroh agreed with a heavy sigh. "You should go back to them. They need you." I stared at him, frowning slightly at the gravity in his voice. Had something happened after I had left? He noticed my frown, and sighed again, although he gave me a sad smile. He took my hand. "I wish you luck. I'm sure we'll meet again, although," he shot Zuko a sideways look, "I hope in better circumstances." Zuko rolled his eyes.

I smiled. "Thank you, Iroh." I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around him in a hug, which he happily returned. It was a good hug, warm and gentle and safe. "Keep him out of too much trouble," I whispered.

He chuckled. "I don't think I can do much about that." I laughed, too, as we released each other from our hug, and then I looked at Zuko.

"Zuko?"

"What?"

"I- do you mind if I?" I raised my arms a bit. I wouldn't be surprised if he rejected me, but after everything we had just been through, I felt like I needed to at least try.

Zuko stared at me in what looked like a mixture of confusion, shock, and - if the way his cheeks suddenly turned a light shade of pink was any sign - shyness. He didn't respond verbally; instead, he just shrugged his shoulders. I wrapped my arms around his upper body, pinning his arms to his side. I lay my hands flat on his back, feeling the heat of his body through his clothes. I had only seen him out of armour a handful of times and didn't even need a whole hand to count the number of times I had held him so close to me. I felt Zuko give me a few awkward pats on the back, and I stifled a laugh.

It was nice.

After a few seconds, I pulled back, placing my hands on his shoulders. "Until next time." I released him.

"Well, nephew, it's best that we be leaving now," Iroh said, grinning at the two of us. Zuko nodded, still staring at me. His cheeks had gone a few shades darker. He stepped away from me, gave a quick Fire Nation bow, and then walked away as fast as he could. Iroh chuckled as he followed him, shooting me another grin as well as a final, "Be well, Tora." I watched as they both disappeared into the building.

Zuko suddenly reappeared in the doorway. "Until next time." Then he was gone again.

I couldn't help but shake my head, sighing almost fondly.

More voices heading in my direction reminded me of my duty - find my friends. I ran through the streets, heading back to the palace, ran through the palace, and found the Spirit oasis door still open, like I had left it. I climbed through. Appa was resting on the grass, his eyes shut. Sokka was kneeling in front of the pond, the place where Aang had been meditating only hours before. Katara was sitting next to him. They weren't saying anything. Yue was nowhere to be seen.

I ran towards them. "Sokka! Katara!"

At the sound of my voice, they both looked up. Katara got to her feet as I ran across the bridge and came to meet me. We crashed into each other, throwing our arms around the other and hugging tightly. I heard chitters and looked up to see Momo flying towards us; he landed and curled up on my head.

"I'm so glad you're alright," Katara whispered. She hugged me tighter, wrapping her arms firmly around my waist and holding me to her as close as she could. I placed my hand on the back of her head, stroking her hair, and ran my other hand up and down her back. "I was worried- you know, Zhao, and- and then Aang- and Yue, oh, Tora, Yue-" Her voice cracked.

I put my hands on her shoulder and gently pushed her away so I could look her in the eyes. "What?" I questioned. "What about Yue?" I looked around. "Where is she? Is she alright?"

Katara looked down at Sokka. He hadn't reacted to my return. Katara's face twisted with worry and grief. She looked back at me. "She-"

"She's gone," Sokka interrupted. His voice was hoarse.

"Gone?" I repeated. I looked from Sokka to Katara and then back to Sokka. "What do you mean- she's-"

"She said the Moon Spirit gave her life, and she gave it back." He still hadn't looked up from the pond. The Moon Spirit was swimming in circles around the Ocean Spirit, once again doing their dance. Before, it had been calming, soothing. "Her body disappeared. Then her ghost came back to say goodbye - I guess she's the new Moon Spirit now." His shoulders shook like he was trying to laugh, but he stopped quickly.

I could hear my heartbeat in my ears again. Yue was dead? She had sacrificed herself? That sweet, gentle princess was dead and there wasn't even a body to bury?

I looked at Katara. Tears were in the corner of her eyes. I took her hands and squeezed them gently. She hugged me again. I stared at Sokka over her shoulder.

"We need to go," Katara whispered to me. "We need to find Aang."

I thought of Aang, alone, after displaying so much power, and I felt the urge to go to him, to find him, to tell him what I needed to tell him.

I looked at Sokka. He wasn't ready to move. I wouldn't feel right, leaving him alone.

"I'll find Aang," I said. "You both stay here. Alright?"

Katara looked at Sokka. Her shoulders slumped. "Okay. We'll come find you later."

We squeezed each other's hands again before I took off. I glanced over my shoulder as I walked across the bridge. Katara was kneeling by Sokka's side again, holding his hand. He was staring at the water, at the two koi fish dancing as though they had never stopped.

Yue had sacrificed herself for that. For them. For all of us.

I placed a hand on Appa's nose. His big brown eyes opened, accompanied by a loud groan. "Let's get out of here," I murmured to him.

As I said "Yip, yip" and Appa took off into the air, Momo crawled down and laid himself out across my shoulders, curling his tail around my neck.

"You two must be worried about Aang, too, huh?" I asked softly. I felt Momo's breathing even out as he fell asleep. I reached up and gently scratched between his ears, and I heard him twitter.

Appa rumbled in response. I patted his head. "Me, too." I looked towards the ground, scanning for any sight of Aang. There was no sign of him, but I was given a wonderful view of all of the damage inflicted by the Fire Nation. There were great piles of snow and ice where there had once been buildings or houses; smoke pillars were still rising, although they had thinned since earlier; coal-balls lay abandoned and scattered across the city, no longer blazing but surrounded by the damage they had caused whenever they hadn't been extinguished or caught quickly enough. There were no signs of soldiers anywhere in the streets below.

I swallowed the sick feeling in the back of my throat and looked forward again. All of that damage had been caused by my people. All the lives lost were because of my people. Yue sacrificed herself because of what had been done by my people (by one of my people but the others hadn't stopped him); I hadn't even been there to see it happen. I should have been there.

But I was glad I hadn't been, and not just because I had gone after Zhao and got a chance to talk to Zuko. I was glad I hadn't been there because I was glad I hadn't had to see it happen. Hearing about it was terrible. Seeing it would have been worse.

The whole world felt like it was tilting. Seeing Yue's sacrifice, witnessing what she had to do, would have turned it upside down.

When had I become so resistant to the idea that the Fire Nation army was horrible? I knew their history, I knew what they had done, I had seen what they had done with my own eyes countless times over the past several months, I had heard stories from survivors, and now I had been witness to a full-out battle. I had heard Jeong Jeong talk about the madness in the army. I had seen what Zhao had done to the Moon Spirit, how his soldiers had just stood and watched as he risked the destruction of the world. I had seen a massacre, witnessed the murder of a little girl, seen the corpses of an entire village cut down where they stood.

And I had justified it all, somehow, by thinking they were all just doing their jobs, doing what they had to do.

But I had been wrong. Some of them, sure, of course, those soldiers we had met over our travels who hadn't really done anything to us, Zuko's crew who were still technically apart of the army, but - wiping out an entire village of innocent civilians and laughing over the body of a child. Standing by and doing nothing while their leader killed the Moon. That was not following orders. That was not doing what they had to do.

Yue had done what she had to do. She had sacrificed herself to save her people.

Following orders - doing their jobs - how could I have thought that justified anything?

There had been doubt in my mind, of course, I knew that what they were doing wasn't right. I had blocked it all out. I had asked Jeong Jeong what he meant by madness. I knew what he meant. I just hadn't wanted to.

Why did it take me so long to realize it all? Why did it have to take Yue's death to make me realize it all?

Appa groaned. My eyes fell on a lone figure on the city wall. I raised the reins and Appa flew down towards Aang.

We landed, and I dismounted. Momo woke up and flew from my shoulders towards Aang, who had turned to watch us when he heard us descending. As Momo landed on Aang's outstretched arm, I slid down Appa's head and onto the ground. When my boots hit the floor I took a moment to examine Aang.

He looked tired.

I approached him. "Are you alright?" I asked him softly.

Aang shook his head and took a step back. "Tora," he said, "Tora, I'm sorry."

I stopped. I stared.

"I promised you - I promised myself - that I wouldn't hurt anyone, and I broke that promise, and I swear I didn't mean to do it, I swear I wasn't in control, I couldn't stop it, I couldn't-" Aang was trembling, his voice breaking like he was on the verge of tears, and he couldn't look me in the eye.

My heart cracked. He was a wreck, exhausted from being in the Avatar State, and he was apologizing to me for breaking his promise to me.

I stepped forward and pulled him into a hug. Aang stiffened, but then he hugged me back and buried his face in my shoulder.

"I'm sorry," he said hoarsely. "I'm sorry." He hugged me tighter. "I'm sorry."

"No, Aang, I'm sorry." I pulled back. I put my hands firmly on his shoulders and looked him in the eyes. "I shouldn't have made you promise me that. It was wrong of me to put you in that position. There-" I swallowed. "There was no other way. I wish there could have been. But there wasn't."

Aang looked down. "No, I should have been in control. If I had been, I could have restrained myself."

"I'm not arguing with that." The Avatar State terrified me. It reminded me too much of myself, when I lost control, when I gave in to myself. "And- and it breaks my heart, knowing that- that so many people died, so many of my people died." I bowed my head, breaking eye contact so I could steady my breathing. Aang put his hand on my arm, and I could feel his concerned gaze on the crown of my head. No, I have to be strong for him. I looked back up at him.

"I know you didn't have a choice," I whispered. "And I'm not angry at you. But Aang." I gripped his shoulders tighter. "Aang, you have to learn to control yourself. There wasn't an option this time, they would have kept going. I know that." It hurt, but it was the truth, and I couldn't keep lying to myself. "I won't make you promise me anything, not like that, ever again - except this: please, Aang, you have to learn to control the Avatar State. People will get hurt in the crossfire, people who don't deserve it, if you don't."

"I know." Aang looked down, like he was ashamed to meet my eyes. "I'll - I'll work on it. I'll do it. I will. I have to."

"I know you can do it." He looked back up at me, and I smiled. "You're a smart kid."

Aang finally smiled back at me, although it was just a tiny one. It disappeared quickly, and we pulled each other in for another tight hug. Aang gave good hugs - he was like Katara, in the way he always poured all of his love and care for the person receiving it into his hug. It made you want to do the same; I breathed steadily, warming myself up, and I could tell Aang felt it when leaned in even more.

Neither of us needed to speak to let each other know it was time to reunite with our friends. Momo, who had taken to flying in circles above us when he had been forced out of his seat on Aang's arm, flew back down to Aang's shoulders and curled up. Appa licked Aang thoroughly, making him laugh and jump onto Appa's head for a sweet hug. I took over flying for him, stating he was definitely not able to fly after what he had just gone through. Aang refused to get into the saddle, though, and gave me company on Appa's head as we flew back to the oasis.

The moon shone brightly above us.

"Aang," I said. Someone has to tell him. "About - about the moon, Yue-"

"I know," he interrupted.

I looked over at him. "You do? How?"

"The Ocean Spirit told me before we separated." Aang stared pensively up at the moon. "She sacrificed herself for her people. It was so brave of her. But still…" he trailed off. I put my hand on his shoulder and patted it gently. He gave me a small, sad smile.

"You ran off, right?" He asked a few seconds later. "After Zhao, I mean. Did you find him?"

"Yeah." I looked forward. "I did. I met up with Zuko. We fought him together. We won. Then the Ocean Spirit - not you, I don't think, but whatever was left of the Spirit's power - came and took Zhao. He's gone."

"Zhao's gone?" Aang repeated. "He's-"

"I don't know if he's dead. If he was drowned or dragged to hell or- but he's gone. We don't have to worry about him anymore." I squeezed his shoulder. "You don't have to worry about him anymore."

Aang sighed. "The monks taught me all life is sacred. Even the lives of our enemies." He looked back at the ocean.

I looked down at my hands. I looked past my hands to look at the city below. "They'll have a funeral service at some point, for everyone who died," I said. "They probably won't bring up the Fire Nation soldiers, since they're the enemy, but, if you want… you and I could hold a small service of our own. Just for us, just for them."

Aang looked at me, his eyes wide. "Really?"

I nodded. "They were our enemy - and most of them still are our enemies." I closed my eyes. I thought of all of the men on Zuko's ship. I thought of the families of the soldiers, back home and waiting and left without a body to burn. "But I think - I think they deserve a proper ceremony, even if it's just us two. If it would make you feel better."

I had always known that the Fire Nation army, all of its soldiers, were human (despite what my friends and so many people thought). I had let my knowledge that humans were not completely evil or good cloud my judgement and let me think that just because the soldiers weren't completely evil, that not all of them did terrible things, excused them somehow.

They were human, that was what made their crimes inexcusable.

But they were human, and that was why they still deserved a proper ceremony.

"That would be nice," Aang said quietly. "I know they weren't - I know what they were doing wasn't good. And others might not think they deserve it. But I think we should."

I opened my eyes. "Yeah," I said. "I know."

~~Water~~

The house we had been staying in had been destroyed, and so had many other houses. As such, anyone whose home had not been destroyed opened their doors to anyone who needed a place to stay. My friends and I, as honoured guests of the North, were given rooms to stay in at the palace. We were given a full view of all of the preparations for the funeral.

The Water Tribe, as I learned, had a custom of having a mass funeral following a battle, whether on their own territory or someone else's, to honour all of those who had fallen in battle at once. Following the funeral, everyone would return to the palace for a celebration.

This was to be the first mass funeral the North had held in almost a hundred years.

The Tribe had suffered far less than the Fire Nation, but they had still suffered. Many had died - their princess had died. News had spread of Yue's sacrifice and 'rebirth' as the new Moon Spirit shortly after Arnook had been told. The people mourned, but they took comfort in the knowledge that their beloved princess had died a noble death and was not completely gone from their lives.

Sokka did not quite see it the same way they did.

Sokka had been quiet ever since That Night, as we had decided to call it ('we' meaning Katara, Aang and I). He spent more time on his own, doing who-knows-what, rarely speaking to us when he was with us. Katara talked to him a lot, one on one, but as she told Aang and me, Sokka was grieving and just needed space and time and love and comfort.

"I don't think he'd want us to walk on eggshells around him," I pointed out when she told us this.

"I know, I know," she sighed. "And I'm not saying we should. We just need to be there for him. Whenever we can. Whenever he lets us. Okay?"

Aang and I said 'Okay.'

The funeral took a week after the siege to prepare. Two days before it happened, Sokka ate dinner with us for the first time in three days. Before, he had taken to eating alone. Katara had explained to us beforehand that he had done the same thing when their mother had died. If he was eating with us, it showed some progress. For a while, we just ate in quiet.

Aang was the first to crack under the silence. "I don't like sea prunes."

Katara stared at him in disbelief. "What?"

"I don't like sea prunes, I tried to pretend I did because I didn't want to offend anyone, but I don't like them, they're gross, I'm sorry."

"They're so good!"

"They're slimy and bitter. The only thing worse is sea slug," I said.

"Neither of you have any sense of taste," Katara insisted. "Sea prunes are delicious. I can't say anything about sea slugs. But they're probably good if you say they aren't."

"Sea prunes have no flavour besides salt and bitterness!" I cried.

"Bato made them too salty," Aang said. I shuddered at the thought. "They tasted like sadness," he concluded.

Katara shook her head in disbelief. "Neither of you have any sense of taste."

"What do you expect from someone who doesn't eat meat and someone from the Fire Nation?" Sokka pointed out. We all turned to stare at him. He had the smallest hint of a smile on his face. "Your taste buds were all burned off years ago."

I scoffed, but the corners of my mouth were curling into a smile. "Listen, buddy, if we ever go to the Fire Nation, I'm going to teach you and your sister about spices and seasoning. I don't know what we can do about him." I pointed at Aang, who was smiling happily at Sokka.

"He's a lost cause," Sokka agreed. "Nothing we can do. So sad."

"Just tragic." I shook my head.

The conversation carried on for a bit longer, and then it stopped. Every so often someone would say something and that would bring about a few more minutes of chatter. Sokka did not take part in all of them, but he did in most of them. Katara laid a hand on his arm at some point, and they exchanged small smiles. Aang actually got Sokka to laugh at one point by trying to make a pun. It wasn't that funny, but Sokka either thought it was hilarious or laughed because it wasn't funny.

The next day, the day before the funeral, Sokka and I took a walk. It hadn't been planned, neither of us had asked if we wanted to walk together, but I walked out the front door and he followed me. All around us were people making arrangements for the next day, or talking about the next day, or discussing how to best fix the damage done to their home or a building they needed to be fixed as soon as possible.

Sokka and I avoided talk of what the next day would bring.

"How's your training been going?"

"Mostly solo work," I admitted. "Umi's been busy, so I've been training myself based on what she's taught me already and the scrolls she has. I'm doing pretty well. Still got some work to do, but I'm getting there. You may have to call me Master Tora one of these days." I grinned cheekily at him.

Sokka rolled his eyes. "Never, in a thousand years."

"I'm gonna be a master three times over!" I cried in mock outrage. "You will show me the proper respect!"

"I'm a master of the boomerang," Sokka countered. "Where's my respect?"

"It comes and it goes." I waited.

"That," Sokka began, "was terrible."

I cackled.

"Leave the jokes to me, please, leave the jokes to me."

"Sarcasm, we can share, right?"

"Well, of course, who else would I go to for that? Katara?"

"She's good at it."

"Not good enough for me."

I shrugged. "Fair enough."

We passed by a crying woman standing outside a house. When the two of us glanced inside, we saw Umi kneeling next to a blanket of sewn-together animal skins, obviously covering a body. I looked over at Sokka. His face, which just seconds before had been lit up with amusement and his normal Sokka smile, had dropped into a stare that conveyed such utter heartbreak and sorrow I felt I shouldn't look at him. I dropped my gaze to the ground. We kept walking. We turned a corner into an empty alley.

"I know what you're doing," Sokka said as we continued to walk. His voice was softer than it normally was. "You're trying to avoid the topic. You've all been doing it."

"Yeah." I couldn't deny it.

"You don't need to," he told me. "None of you do. It's okay. I can handle it."

"I know you can."

We walked in silence for a little bit. I chewed my lip and looked at him out of the corner of my eye. Sokka was staring straight ahead.

"We're gonna be there with you," I said. "Tomorrow."

"Yeah, I know."

I stopped and I grabbed his arm. Sokka stopped and turned to look at me quizzically.

"No, no, I mean it. We're gonna be there with you. All of us. We're gonna hold your hand and give you hugs, or space if you need that, and afterwards, if you need to go be by yourself and cry, we'll be outside whatever room you're in and keeping people away. Or if you need to get angry and break things, I'll break things with you. Katara and Aang might not be up for that. Or if you just need to get drunk, I'll get drunk with you. I know Katara and Aang would definitely not be up for that. I don't know your process or how Water Tribe wakes function, am I close? Point is, we're all gonna be there supporting you. As long as you need us, you've got us."

"Yeah," Sokka repeated. "I know." But his eyes had softened and his shoulders relaxed. I stepped forward and hugged him gently. He hugged me back.

We continued our walk.

~~Water~~

I had never been to a Water Tribe funeral before. My father had told me that the Southern Tribe had been forced to change their traditions due to the lack of waterbenders. The practice itself was similar, but enough changes had been made to make it a new experience for Sokka and Katara, as well as for Aang and me.

The ceremony began as the sun set and the moon rose. The bodies, wrapped in animal skins, were placed onto canoes in the canals around the city. The citizens lined the streets, each carrying a candle contained in a small bowl. Waterbenders, the masters at least, were stationed everywhere. As the sun disappeared beyond the horizon, the waterbenders began to push the water. The canoes began to float down the canals through the city, and the waterbenders continued to gently push them along, assisting whenever there was a sharp turn or a drop in tiers.

As the canoes passed by, the citizens placed their candles into the water, and the gentle waves ensured the candles wouldn't tip over and sink. The candles drifted along with the boats, flickering softly in the darkness.

My friends and I waited towards the end of the city, where the canals converged and led towards the wall at the edge of the city. More waterbenders waited there to open up a path to the ocean, where the canoes would float out. Then, the eldest waterbending masters, including Umi, who stood on top of the wall, would send a wave out, submerging the boats and the candles, and send them to the ocean floor.

By the time the procession passed us by, so many candles drifted among the boats that, in the darkness, I thought they looked almost like stars.

We all placed our candles in the water. They drifted out to join the others but somehow managed to stay together, floating in circles around each other. We stepped back from the edge of the platform. Katara was the first to take Sokka's hand, and then she took Aang's. Aang took mine. We watched the rest of the boats float by, and we watched as they floated down the main canal towards the wall. We watched until the last boat disappeared beyond the wall. We were not able to see the masters on the wall, but moments after the last boat disappeared, there was the sound of a horn being blown to let the citizens know the last step had been taken.

Everyone began heading to the palace. Katara and Sokka followed them after Aang and I told them we would catch up a little later.

Aang and I found a secluded place. I pulled a few sticks of incense, borrowed from Umi's cave, and placed them in an incense holder, also borrowed from Umi's cave. I flicked my fingers and lit the incense. I placed it at the center of a small piece of cloth Aang had provided.

I explained to him that normally, we would put down some pieces of food that the deceased had liked, but since there were so many dead, there was no way to do that. I could not remember the proper words of prayer, or even if there was a prayer. Aang put his hands together and bowed his head. I just bowed my head and kept my hands in my lap.

I'm sorry. But there was no other way. And I can't keep making excuses.

I thought of Zuko's crew and squeezed my eyes shut. I'm sorry.

What I did remember was that normally, one would stay with the shrine as long as possible, or let it stay up for an entire day. But we couldn't do that, so after sitting for fifteen minutes, we packed up the pieces and headed for the palace.

I asked Aang what the Air Nomads did for their funerals. He told me that the dying had their book of the dead read to them, and after they died, their bodies were cremated and spread to the wind. The great masters had their ashes stored for as many years as they had been alive, and then had their ashes spread to the wind. Everyone returned to the wind eventually, he told me.

When he asked me about the Fire Nation funerals, or if they had changed in a hundred years, I shrugged. I knew nothing about what funerals had been like. Our bodies were cremated, the guests and family wore all white, and after the ceremony, there was a huge party to celebrate the life the dead had lived.

The Water Tribe had a different custom for what came after the funeral - instead of a huge party, it was a solemn occasion that lasted all through the night, everyone talking to each other. In some ways it felt familiar - I overheard many people talking about all of the accomplishments their loved one had made in life, and heard laughter amongst some groups. For the most part, though, it was very formal.

Sokka and Katara found us, and we stayed together for most of the night. I looked around for Umi a bit and saw her speaking with Pakku. Later I saw them both going around and speaking to several other people together. I did not see Arnook anywhere.

As the sun rose, the guests returned to their homes. My friends and I followed them, but not for the same reason; Sokka went over to join Arnook, who stood staring up at the full moon still hanging in the morning sky. Aang stood at the edge of the tier, looking out across the city and the sea, where pieces of Fire Nation ships still jutted out of the water.

Pakku and Umi came up to Katara and me.

"We've decided to go to the South Pole," Pakku announced to us as he looked over the city. "Some other benders and healers want to join us." He turned to us, though I knew he was speaking mostly to Katara, his star pupil. "We've decided to finally rejoin our sister tribe."

"What about Aang?" Katara asked, looking over at the boy in question. "He still needs to master waterbending."

"Then," Pakku said with a smirk on his face, "he better start calling you Master Katara."

Katara smiled. I nudged her gently in the arm, smiling proudly at her.

Umi put her arm around my shoulder and led me away from my friends. When we were not in danger of being overheard, she said, "I'm sorry to have to cut our training short."

"We would have had to anyway," I said. "It's not like I could have stayed - we have to go and get Aang his earthbending master." I winced internally at the thought of returning to Omashu.

"Yes, I know." Umi sighed deeply. "But I wish I could have helped you more - prepared you more. You have done well, but you're not - I don't know if you're ready for the choice yet."

I thought back to the night of the battle. "I lost control. I didn't - I nothing bad happened, but I still lost control. Or I nearly did. I could have." I paused. "But I didn't. I don't know if that means anything to you, but it does to me."

Umi sighed again. "No, it's good, that's good, you're doing all you can. But it's not the same. Keeping the chaos contained, keeping control, it isn't the same as being ready."

"Maybe it isn't, but you've given me more to work with than I had before. So thank you for that."

She sighed a third time. It wasn't out of frustration; I could tell it was more out of resignation. "When's your birthday?"

"Late spring." I stroked the jewels of my necklace. It wasn't a lot of time to make a choice, but it was still better than nothing. It wasn't a lot of time to become a master, but I knew I could do it. I had Katara to help me with waterbending when I needed it. I had a firmer grip on firebending than before, and it was a much simpler skill than waterbending was - it was still difficult, but it was easier.

I didn't know if I could become a master without an actual master declaring me as such, but even if I couldn't, I was going to. I had to. For myself, and for my friends.

I left Umi's side and joined my friends. I surprised Aang by throwing my arm over his shoulder. He jumped slightly but then smiled when he saw it was me. I grinned back. Katara laughed, and when I saw that her hand was resting on Aang's shoulder, I placed my hand on top of hers. My free hand, I put on Sokka's shoulder. We exchanged smiles.

We looked out across the horizon. So much was waiting for us.

...shit. That's it. Book One is over. Over five years and it's finally done.

Wow.

Um.

Insert that reaction gif of Michael Scott going "OH MY GOD OKAY IT'S HAPPENING EVERYONE STAY CALM STAY FUCKING CALM" and you have my feelings about finishing this.

I guess I don't really know what to say?

Realistically, the final scene of the episode likely takes place the day following the battle. But I guess I didn't want to take the easy route. Plus I wanted to take some time to come down from the high of all of the fighting and tension.

There was a lot of stuff I wanted to put in the author's notes, but this is already pretty long (thirty-four pages, god) and I don't want to clutter it up (more than I usually do), so I'm posting an author's note chapter after this chapter just for some final words from me (notes on this chapter, and some final notes on the story as a whole). Plus I wanted to make a graceful exit out of this chapter.

Because this is the final chapter, I present to you, my faithful readers, the Incorrect Quote my sister made for me:

Sokka: You two just need to bone.

Tora: What did you say?

Katara: Don't say it again.

Sokka: I said you two need to bone.

Katara: *whimpers*

Tora: How dare you, Sokka! We are friends!

Zuko: Bone!

Tora: *sternly* What happens in my tent, Sokka, is none of your business.

Zuko: Bone?!

Tora: *calmly* Don't ever speak to me like that again.

Source: Brooklyn 99 (which is a fantastic show.)

I'll be back shortly with an author's note chapter (*sarcastically* because everyone loves those) so keep your eyes open.