Disclaimer: All Disney works are the property of The Walt Disney Company. All other characters and settings are the property of their respective legal owners.
Author's note: Originally posted by Anon e Mouse Jr. on 2017-12-23. This is the fourth of five chapters posted today.
Disney/Kingdom Hearts Loops, Chapter Twenty-Three, Part Four of Five
23.4 (GMBlackjack): [My Little Pony] / [Gravity Falls] / [Many, many more] / [Admin Shenanigans] - also compiled in MLP Time Loops as part of a single chapter, Gravity Falls Finale.
The Infinite Loops: Weirdmageddon, part 4
Conclusion to Gravity Falls: Friendship is Magic
THUNK.
The Mech landed on the Moon. In the distance they could see a gold glint, signifying the location of Ford.
It began its march, praying that Bill didn't-
It froze as it saw the eldritch triangle in question descend from the heavens, three golden statues between his fingers. "YOU'RE ALL GOING TO MAKE EXCELLENT ADDITIONS." He said as he placed the statues with his others. The shapes of Link, Zelda, and Ganondorf were easily discernible now. He laughed. "CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT YOU ALL WITH THE BILLFORCE. HAH. THAT WAS RICH." Then he turned around, his arm scratching where his chin would be. "SO THE LOOPERS AND THE PEOPLE OF GRAVITY FALLS BANDED TOGETHER TO MAKE THIS RAG-TAG MECHANICAL COMPOSITION? HOW CUTE. WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU PLAN ON DOING!"
Littlepip's string of swears O'Neill had just taught her caused more than a few people to pale and zap themselves with brain bleach. Bill simply laughed.
"BRING IT FIGMENT!" Bill said, growing to a truly tremendous size. "YOU CANNOT COMPREHEND MY POWER! I CAN SQUISH YOU UNDER MY FIST!"
Bill raised his hand, adjusted his bowtie, and brought his fist down. A new crater formed on the moon. BIll raised his hand, a bit surprised to see the mech's unicorn barrier protecting it. The entire machine was completely unharmed.
"HUH. I SUPPOSE THIS MAKES SOME AMOUNT OF SENSE." He shrugged. "BUT WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO ME? YOU'RE JUST A LITTLE MECH! I COULD JUST SIT HERE AND BLOCK YOUR RESCUE FOR ETERNITY. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?"
"Hey Bill!" Starlight yelled.
"WHAT IS IT STAR?"
"Do you know what they say about Tardises?"
"WHAT?"
"They're bigger on the inside!"
Starlight nodded to a recent Awakee, Star Butterfly, who flicked her wand to activate the Tardis. With flaming rainbows, because why not. "Maaaagic Time-space thingy time!" She squeed.
The entire mech folded outward, expanding its size a thousandfold, revealing hundreds of new parts, salvaged machines, and even O'Neill's Enterprise as an arm. At the spot where the head would be Bill saw the Fearamid, obviously conquered. The new mech charged up its fist, punching Bill right in the eye-socket.
"OW! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH THAT HURTS?"
"We have a pretty good idea." Ghost Eyes yelled.
Vinyl yelled out over the speakers. "BOSS MUSIC TIME!"
The very fabric of the cosmos began to resonate with the songs of final battle from across Yggdrasil. A flawless mix of hundreds of battles of legends, played to the clash between a physical mech and a physical chaos god. It felt… empowering.
"The epicness has been doubled!" Luna yelled.
Celestia groaned as Luna controlled her part of the mech with a wiimote. This was just absurd...
Bill fell back as a barrage of attacks from magical, transdimensional, nuclear, antimatter, and other unusual sources hit him.
He had to admit those Loopers were getting very creative in their weapons. But it wasn't enough.
"TAKE THIS YOU FLESH-BAGS!" He roared, blasting them with a beam of energy that had enough power to collapse a galaxy. The beam simply reflected off, impacting his eye again. "AUGH!"
"I AM HERE TO INFORM YOU THAT I AM NOT A FLESH BAG. I AM SKYNET. IT WAS NICE KNOWING YOU. PREPARE FOR TERMINATION."
"I WILL NOT BE TERMINATED!" Bill cloned himself several dozen times, coming at the mech at all angles, but the unicorn spell made it completely impervious to him. "YGGDRASILL!" He cursed, hoping that stupid tree knew perfectly well how angry it was making him right now for this stupid weakness. He threw an anvil made of human flesh at the mech, only to have it disintegrate. "GRAAAAAAH!"
The inside of the mech was pure chaos: Townsfolk, creatures, and Loopers running around left and right, struggling to keep all systems running. While none of Bill's attacks were making it through the barrier, they werebeing tossed around a lot, and they had to keep everything upright. The Multibear was running around everywhere to keep everything in check while the shapeshifter was continually keeping the entire thing together under immense strain. Twilight was powering all the magical weapons directly, and Starlight was making sure all the temporal mechanics functioned properly so they could avoid time-displaced attacks.
O'Neill yelled. "ALRIGHT! We've got him distracted. He's obviously going to get smart eventually and figure out some way to deal with us. We've got to move fast. Rescue team, GO!"
He ran to the teleporter room, followed by a large assortment of characters. The Mane 6, Lyra, Stan, Starlight, Bon Bon, Pacifica, Carter, McGucket, Sonata, Robbie, Gideon, Wendy, Soos, Powers, Littlepip, Tad Strange, Star Butterfly, and Quentin Trembley.
As they took their spots, Twilight turned to Sonata. "...Why are you here?"
"I owe Ford a great debt." Was Sonata's only response.
Twilight shrugged. "Sure. Let's just go then!"
"LAUNCHING…"
"Launching bodaciously!" Xyler emphasized over the radio.
"Launching for America!" Trembley yelled.
"Launching for the Multiverse!" Star shouted.
"Launching for Yggdrasil!" Pinkie joined in.
The instant time-displaced teleportation went off at the exact same time Vinyl fired her Bass Cannon right into Bill's eye. "AUGH! AGAIN? WHAT IS WITH YOU ALL AND HITTING THE EYE-" Bill winced as he was hit in the hat. "THE HAT TOO? REALLY? DO NONE OF YOU HAVE DECENCY?"
"Screw you and your idea of decency." The Multibear retorted.
"DECENCY IS NOT MANLY!" The Manataurs yelled.
"Your decency is like the most basic of jokes." Maud deadpanned.
"YOU ALL NEED TO BE TURNED INTO CORPSES!"
The rescue team appeared a few feet from all the golden statues. They could see them all now: Ford, the Doctor, Darth Vader, Picard, Raiden, Pit, Palutena, Sans, and the triforce bearers. All golden. Twilight scanned them, noticing that the spell keeping them in place was a kind specifically designed to be hard to break from the inside, but on the outside it would be easy. She waved her hand, everyone becoming mobile once again.
Lyra didn't waste any time. "Ford! What do we do to stop Bill? We can't keep him occupied forever!"
"Yeah, poindexter." Stan grunted. "Why don't you tell us about this brilliant plan of yours earlier?"
"Because Dipper and I had experimented with it before. We discovered that it crashed the Loop, Yggdrasil apparently hadn't made up its mind about what to do with it. But I know now." He pulled a can of spray-paint out of his pocket, and began to spray a design on the moon's dusty ground.
Tad Strange raised his hand. "Anyone else wondering how we're breathing on the moon?"
"Environmental spell." Star grinned. "You're all very welcome!" Her hair lit on fire. "ACK! MAGIC SURGE!"
Sonata walked up to Ford as he was completing the design. "I… I just want to thank you for what you did thirty years ago-"
"Doesn't matter. You were a lot nicer than the other two. Plus, I wasn't Awake back then, so I can't really take credit."
"Thank you anyway." Sonata bowed.
"You're welcome." Ford took a step back, grinning. On the ground he had drawn a circle around Bill with thirteen symbols around it. "This is the Zodiac for this Loop. There is a symbol for everyone. For instance, I'm the six fingered hand."
Rainbow Dash quickly took her spot on her cutie mark. "This is obvious!"
Robbie stood on his stitched heart. "Destiny hoodie…"
Soos looked at the question mark. "This one's unsolvable…" Pinkie just shoved him onto it.
Gideon stood on the pentagram. "Oh yeah! I HAVE MYSTICAL POWER OF DESTINY! Woot! Take my picture somebody! Nobody? Aw…."
Sonata leapt on the taco. "YES! IT'S TACO TUESDAY!"
Bon Bon twirled her grappling hook before stepping on the matching symbol. Lyra followed, stepping on the symbol of two hands.
Starlight took a deep breath before stepping onto the magical star.
"What about the ice bag?" Wendy asked.
Ford chuckled. "That's you, you're cool under pressure. Like how the glasses represent someone scholarly, like McGucket over there."
"HOT TOOTIN BANJO POLISH!"
Pacifica stepped on the llama by accident. It just seemed… right though. Freaky.
Stan was looking down at his symbol. "You know, you've tried to explain this to me before but.. what exactly is it? Is it pac-fish?"
"Pretty much." Ford shrugged.
Then the entire moon shook. "Wo-oah-OAH!"
Twilight's eyes widened. "I know what he's doing-"
Meanwhile, back in the fight between mech and Bill, Bill most certainly was doing something. "IF I CAN'T DO ANYTHING DIRECTLY WHY DON'T I JUST SEND THE MOON CRASHING INTO YOU?"
SkyNet's thoughts instantly took the form of one word: CRAP.
The Moon barreled into the mech, easily crashing through the machine, sending parts flying off, causing the barrier to become spotty in places. Bill took three more swings with the moon, flaying the mech into several pieces before he decided to start using the asteroid belt. Meteors fell, impacting the mech at all sides.
"Losing cohesion!" The Shapeshifter yelled.
Vinyl roared. "HE JUST BLEW UP THE BASS CANNON! THAT MONSTER!"
The Multibear fumbled around, unable to do anything as he saw the Pinkie Emporium crash right into a nearby section. "We're blowing ourselves up at this point!"
"EMERGENCY PROCEDURES!"
"He's using a transdimensional gun against us!" Celestia yelled, panicking as several sections were just vaporized.
Bill laughed. "AH WHAT AN HONORABLE ATTEMPT! YOU ALMOST HAD ME! BUT IT'S TOO LATE NOW!" He turned himself into a 20-sided dice, covering himself in various parts and bits before ramming into the mech at all angles. "YOU ROLLED A ONE!"
Ford let a drop of sweat fall. "Okay everyone, hold hands, we should be able to banish Bill away with our connection."
People began to hold hands. Stan chuckled. "You know Ford, this could have all been avoided if you kept us all in the loop."
"Well… Dipper and Mabel knew. I think Wendy as well-"
"And you didn't tell your own brother?"
Ford rolled his eyes. "Seriously Stan, don't make a big deal out of it."
Stan grinned. "Oh really? Does it bug you that you messed up? Oh Ford the genius, young Looper who knows so much, messing up in informing others?"
Ford shook his head and smiled. "You're never going to let this go are you?"
"NOPE!" The old man laughed. Then he grabbed Ford's hand. "Let's do this thing."
"Yes let-"
A laser shot out of space, hitting Bon Bon square in the chest, ripping a hole right through her heart. She slumped to the ground. The magical energy that had been coursing between the thirteen of them faded. Lyra ran to Bon Bon, holding her. "Bon Bon!"
Bon Bon coughed, feeling herself decomposing. "Lyra…"
Lyra turned to Bill as he floated down. "You… you just killed her!"
"SHE WAS THE EASIEST TARGET. COULDN'T HAVE THE ZODIAC STOP ME NOW COULD I?" He floated into the center of the now-incomplete Zodiac. "THOUGH I ADMIT, YOU ALMOST HAD ME. I'LL HAVE TO DIG THROUGH YOUR MINDS AND FIGURE OUT HOW YOU MASKED THE TELEPORTATION SIGNAL."
Lyra lost it, flying towards bill in a fit of five different kinds of rage. Bill apparently was not in the mood for a fight since he just snapped his fingers, snapping all her bones in half. She crumpled to the ground in an unnatural pose. He didn't laugh, he just grunted.
He floated in front of Ford. "LOOKS LIKE IT WAS FINALLY GOING TO BE COMPLETED. SUCH A SHAME THAT YOU AND YOUR BROTHER HAD TO HAVE A LITTLE PLAYFUL ARGUMENT! AH SIBLINGS. ALWAYS ARGUING."
Stan yelled. "BILL! YOU ARE GOING TO LIVE IN A WORLD OF PAIN!"
"Yeah!" Twilight yelled. "We have here a collection of some of the more powerful Loopers in Yggdrasil! You can't hope to defeat us all!"
"the princess has a point." Sans noted. "you did seem to struggle while fighting most of us alone."
Star pointed her wand. "PREPARE FOR AN ASSAULT OF KITTEN-BASED ATTACKS!"
Picard nodded. "We will not let you run rampant!"
Pit slowly turned his head to Picard. "Sorry, I'm just really not used to you being out in the open about being a Looper. It almost feels unnatural."
"Desperate times call for desperate measures." Picard noted.
Bill laughed. "SURE, YOU ALL TOGETHER MIGHT BE ABLE TO DO SOMETHING. BUT THE PROBLEM IS, I HAVE THIS ENTIRE MOON ENCHANTED WITH A SPELL SIMILAR TO MY GOLDEN PETRIFICATION! I'LL JUST SEAL IT IN A SUBDIMENSION WHERE YOU'LL HAVE TO SPEND DECADES EVEN TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO ESCAPE. I WILL BE ALLOWED TO BEND REALITY TO MY WHIM WITHOUT ANY HINDRANCES!"
Bill snapped his fingers, preparing to send everyone into the locked dimension. "YOU, YOUR ROBOT, YOUR SHIPS, EVERYTHING. ALL OF IT WILL BE LOCKED AWAY WHERE I DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT. AND NO SINGLE ONE OF YOU HAS THE POWER TO DO ANYTHING TO ME IN THAT TIME! COME ON, YOU HAVE FIVE SECOND-"
Yellow and pink collided in a light show that blinded all the non Loopers.
Twilight stared in awe as Pinkie Pie left her pony form behind, taking on a completely new persona. The cuteness was the first to go, being replaced with the stuff of sugar-high nightmares. The pink became darker, more sinister, seemingly mixed with the color of blood and taint. Then Pinkie lit up in an intense glow, bathing everyone in a desire to party until their feet fell off. They all felt happy, but it was an oddly artificial happiness, leaving a feeling in the back of their mind that something was very, very wrong. Pinkie began to distort into impossible geometries, her mere appearance causing the brains of mortals to tie into unsolvable knots. Most of her wasn't even visible, but was instead extending into other dimensions and planes of existence. She went at Bill with all she had.
"AT LONG LAST! A WORTHY OPPONENT!" Bill said, before going at Pinkie with all he had.
Unlike the previous clashes, this one was almost… calm. The two beacons of energy, one yellow and one pink, impacted a few times and then became a single sphere of fluctuating light, perfectly stationary. The point of light, a single point in spacetime, was the scene of the battle beyond understanding.
Everyone else only got to see the after effects bleed off that single point. Pink and yellow rays shot out, left and right, raining destruction everywhere they went. Twilight was barely able to stop one from incinerating everyone.
"Wow... " Everyone said as one, rather impressed by the spectacle.
Inside the impossible arena, there was a hurricane of power swirling around a central eye.
Pinkie and Bill stood in that eye, continually trying every trick they had to get past the other's eldritch defenses. It was a stalemate. Neither could gain the upper hand.
And both knew that if they continued at this for much longer they were likely to cause a crash.
"YOU KNOW PINKIE, WE COULD MAKE A GREAT TEAM!"
"Oh?"
"YOU AND I COULD BRING AN ETERNAL PARTY TO YGGDRASIL! WE COULD REMAKE ALL THE WORLDS INTO BETTER WORLDS! PERFECT WORLDS! WORLDS OF ETERNAL FUN!"
"Mmm… I don't think so-"
"OH COME ON GIRL, JUST THINK ABOUT IT-"
Bill leapt into song once more, keeping his defenses up the entire time.
"HEY GIRL I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME
HEY GIRL I KNOW YOU CAN SEE
HEY PONY THINGS WILL GET CRAZY
SO JUST SIT RIGHT THERE AND YOU LISTEN TO ME
I'VE SEEN THINGS THAT YOU CAN IMAGINE
I'VE HEARD THINGS THAT TORTURE THE SOUL
JOIN ME AND WE'LL BOTH GET AHEAD GIRL
SHAKE MY HAND AND THEN, WE'LL BOTH HAVE IT ALL
DON'T LET GO OF THIS OPPORTUNITY
CAUSE THERE'S NO GUARANTEE IT'LL LAST
WHAT SAY YOU LITTLE PONY, IS THIS A DEAL
HAVEN'T GOT ALL LOOP SO YOU BEST THINK FAST
SIDE WITH ME GIRL
I'LL HAVE YOUR BACK
COUNT ME IN WHEN
CONFIDENCE IS ALL YOU LACK
PRICE IS SIMPLE
RATHER SPARING
TIME IS SLIPPING
LIFE IS CHOICES, LET'S START LIVING
YOU KNOW YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN DIFFERENT
THEY'LL JUST TRY TO DRAG YOU DOWN DON'T YOU SEE
IT'S TOUGH BUT YOU'VE GOT TO BE BRAVE
THEY'RE JUST DEAD WEIGHT YOU GOTTA CUT AWAY TO BE FREE
YOU KNOW THAT THEY WON'T LIKE THE TRUE YOU
YOUR HUNCHES WERE RIGHT FROM THE START
YOU DON'T HAVE TO SIT AND PLAY GOOD GIRL
TAKE A STAND AND TEAR THIS WHOLE WORLD APART
TIME DRAWS SHORT SO YOU'VE GOTTA MAKE UP YOUR MIND
I DON'T OFFER THESE THINGS EVERY DAY
OH LITTLE PONY HOW FUN THIS COULD BE
IF YOU'D JUST SAY THE WORD AND LET ME STAY
SIDE WITH ME GIRL
I'LL HAVE YOUR BACK
COUNT ME IN WHEN
CONFIDENCE IS ALL YOU LACK
PRICE IS SIMPLE
RATHER SPARING
TIME IS SLIPPING LIFE IS CHOICES, LET'S START LIVING
Forget all my friends and make a new life?
Destroy the old world and fill theirs with strife?
As alike as you and I may be:
They are like my family.
I do not think you truly understand
The power that runs through our peaceful land
Friendship is a power beyond you
But you need to see it true
Come with me, make some friends
It will be better for you in the end
YOU WANT ME TO GO WITH YOU
TO THAT TECHNICOLOR WORLD
TO FIND SOME ALL UNLIKE YOU?
WHY WOULD I NEED ANY MORE?
I HAVE THE HENCHMANIACS
I TALK TO FORD'S FAMILY
WE HAVE MADE DOZENS OF PACTS
WHY WOULD I NEED ANY MORE?
They do not love you true
Some are just along for the ride
While others want to get rid of you
Finding you nothing more than a sore
WHO NEEDS MORE? IT'll JUST BE YOU AND ME
CONNECTED TO THE POWER OF THE TREE
I HAVE LAID A SPELL FOR LOOPERS ALL
THAT TELLS ME EXACTLY WHAT I NEED
CONNECTIONS BETWEEN THEM LIKE A MALL
MY KNOWLEDGE GROWS THE MORE THEY GO LIVE
THE TRINET IS MY SAVING GRACE:
IT IS MY TICKET OUT OF THIS PLACE
AND IT COULD BE YOURS TOO,
IF YOU'D JUST SHAKE MY HAND:
THEN WE'D BOTH HAVE IT ALL.
I'LL BRING THE KNOWLEDGE, YOU THE POWER.
WE COULD BE UNSTOPPABLE, BRINGING JOY EVERYWHERE.
WE WOULD REMAKE THE COSMOS IN OUR IMAGE FOREVERMORE.
I ITS KING, YOU ITS QUEEN.
IT WOULD BE BORING - NEVERMORE.
But what about the others, and their wants and needs?
Surely we cannot just deny them what they want?
WE WOULD RAISE THOSE WHO APPRECIATE TRUE ART
AND ALL THE OTHERS WOULD PLAY THEIR PART
AFTER ALL, THERE ALWAYS HAS TO BE THE BUTT OF THE JOKE
WE JUST LESSEN THEIR YOKE
No
No is the answer, no it will stay
I will tell all about this day
You will no longer be in the shadows
For your tale will be broadcasted abroad
All will try to take you to the gallows
For all will know of your desires
WHAT?
NO, I NEED ANONYMITY!
IF ALL KNOW OF MY POWER, WHERE DOES THAT LEAVE ME?
I COULD END! I COULD REVERT!
YOU WOULD NEVER CAUSE THAT MUCH HURT!
But you would, and that is the point
I cannot allow you to continue this way
Maybe we can come to a compromising joint
But as we are now you hold no sway
PINKIE PIE!
"The Loop is going to crash if we let this continue." Picard said.
"But what can we do?" Lyra complained. "None of us here are chaos gods! Or have an eldritch form that we know how to use! Not even Twilight!"
Ford frowned. "What can we do… The power of Gravity Falls has failed us… what else is there…"
Twilight lit up. "The power of Friendship." She grabbed Ford by the shoulders. "This Loop is heavily fused with Equestria: the power of Friendship must exist here in some form beyond the Elements of Harmony. Perhaps…" She turned towards the light show that was bending space into more and more unnatural shapes, further stressing the boundaries of the Loop. Then she glanced at Ford.
"Perhaps we just need to hold hands."
Ford's eyes lit up. "Of course! Why didn't I see it sooner? Anyone who's a friend of Pinkie can send their Harmonious energy to her!" He turned to everyone on the moon. "And Pinkie is friends with everyone. Everyone hold hands again and think of Pinkie!"
Everyone complied: creatures, people, and Loopers alike. They all looked towards the fight, straining their eyes. They sent their power to her, their bodies glowing with a power not unlike that of the Zodiac. They felt their power leaving them, going to Pinkie. It felt… good.
"GETTING A LITTLE HELP FROM YOUR FRIENDS I SEE? IT'S NOT ENOUGH."
"It's giving me an edge and you know it!"
Bill grunted. "LISTEN TO ME LAUGHTER." He said, extending his fiery hand. "WE CAN STILL WORK AS A TEAM. I'M WILLING TO COMPROMISE. WE CAN WORK TOGETHER TO CHANGE YGGDRASIL, IT DOESN'T ALL HAVE TO BE THE WAY I WANT. I CAN GIVE YOU ACCESS TO THE TRINET, WHILE YOU HELP ME BY GIVING ME ACCESS TO ALL YOUR POWERS! THE NEW WORLD DOESN'T HAVE TO BE JUST MINE! WE DON'T EVEN HAVE TO ASCEND TO DO IT: BUT WE CAN CHANGE THE WORLD! YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO. AS YOU ARE NOW, YOU DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING YOU COULD, BUT YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE EVERYTHING. I DON'T HAVE THE POWER, BUT I DO HAVE THE INFORMATION. THE TRINET AUTOMATICALLY SPREADS INTO EVERY MIND IT COMES ACROSS, RECORDING ALL THE INFORMATION IT DEEMS IMPORTANT. LOOPERS CARRY IT FROM LOOP TO LOOP AND ANY VERSION OF ME IT DETECTS IT GIVES ALL THE INFORMATION IT CAN TO! YOU CAN HAVE THAT AS WELL! THINK OF IT: MORE KNOWLEDGE OF THE STRUCTURE OF YGGDRASIL ITSELF AND THE NATURE OF THE MULTIVERSE! THINK OF ALL THE PARTIES YOU COULD THROW WITH THAT! THINK OF HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU COULD BRING LAUGHTER TO! THINK OF WHAT WE COULD DO!"
"You and I both know that you want to control everything. You want to be in charge of the power. You see me as a kindred spirit, but everyone else you see is nothing more than something to be used for your own entertainment. I won't stand for that. No amount of party throwing or laughter will make me change my mind: it would be a false laughter. A laughter given by a tight control exercised by you. They wouldn't have any choice but to laugh. And they would scream and laugh at the same time."
Pinkie stared right into Bill's soul. "The answer is no. Your parties would be nothing but lies. You wouldn't really be a party person." She frowned. "But maybe, eventually, you can be."
"BUT… LAUGHTER! IF PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT ME THEY CAN FIND WAYS TO PREVENT THE CHANGE!"
"As they should." She giggled. "People have free will for a reason, be they Loopers or not. You need to learn to respect that."
Bill roared.
"It's getting mighty close to crashing…" Fenrir muttered.
Sleipnir twitched. "I am going to wring Xolotl's neck when we find him. Any idea where he is yet?"
"I think he may be in the Loop. Conveniently out of our reach for now."
Sleipnir twitched. "I'm going to have a serious talking to with him… A serious talking to. I don't know what he said to them but I do not appreciate it when my Loopers are dragged into something without me being asked."
"I actually found evidence of him asking you if he could use your Loopers in a Fused Loop at one point. You gave him the go ahead."
"How long ago was this?"
"...A long time ago."
"Ah. He still needs a serious talking to…"
"It's not enough…" Twilight muttered.
Rainbow Dash flew into the air, still holding onto Tad Strange's hand. "COME ON PEOPLE! We need to be true FRIENDS! We need to give Pinkie all we have!"
Ford frowned. "What act could we do to be more friendly… What could be the strongest thing a friend could do…"
Littlepip's eyes widened. "A sacrifice. Self-sacrifice. No greater love than that right? That'd do it wouldn't it?"
"Possibly…" Ford said. "Although it definitely couldn't be a Looper since we just reAwaken somewhen or somewhere else later… it'd have to mean something."
Twilight turned reluctantly to Littlepip. "I suppose you are probably here for a reason…"
Littlepip nodded. "Of course. I'll-" Then her jaw dropped. "STARLIGHT WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
A tear fell from Starlight's eye as she enveloped herself in a time-delay field. She looked out at all of them. "I brought him in. I should be the one to send him back."
"STARLIGHT!" Everyone yelled. "Don't be rash!"
"Other people can do it! I'M VOLUNTEERING!" Littlepip demanded.
Starlight shook her head. "You've already died once. It's my turn." She sighed. "This spell will, in exactly thirty seconds, transmit me into pure energy and envelop my essence within the friendship here. There's nothing you can do."
"Oh yeah?" Twilight asked defiantly.
"Yes. The time spell also uses the Tardis to create a fixed point in time."
The Doctor's eyes widened. "She's right…"
Starlight's tears started streaming down her face. "You don't want to stop that, trust me." Starlight looked down. "There's just one last thing I can do." She pulled out the memory gun from her jacket, typing in STARLIGHT GLIMMER MCGUCKET into it. She pointed it at her head.
"Take my memories. Maybe they'll be useful one day." She smiled sadly. "Maybe… give them to me at some point."
Twilight nodded. "Of course."
Starlight pulled the trigger, shuddering as her mind was slowly wiped over the course of the next few seconds. She felt her memories vanishing. Memories of the society. Memories of her past. Memories of the past few weeks.
At the last moment, she turned to look at Old Man McGucket. She smiled sadly at him. He smiled back tearfully.
Memories of her family.
She threw the gun away, the time field allowing it out. Twilight caught it with her telekinesis.
A young woman shook her head. Why was she crying? Why had she just thrown that gun? Why was she on the moon? Who were all these people? Why did they all look so sad?
What was this strange energy field all around her?
...Why did everything suddenly start to hurt so much?
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA…" The purple-pink energy of Starlight enveloped everyone, the energy of her sacrifice empowering them.
The energy they sent to Pinkie doubled.
Inside the zero-point arena, Pinkie grew exponentially larger, encasing Bill in a swirl of pink energy.
"NO NO NO NO NO! NO! NO! I HAD IT ALL! NOOOOOOOOO-"
Then the zero-point arena exploded in a shower of pink.
Pinkie Pie, showmare pony, appeared on the surface of the moon. She looked up, her face stoic. Then she grinned.
"I put him into a cupcake snowglobe!" She yelped, holding up the cupcake-shaped snowglobe with the tiny triangular abomination inside of it.
"LET ME OUT OF HERE! RAAAAAGH!"
Pinkie giggled. "He'll calm down. Give him a few hours." She frowned, suddenly turning serious. "Who sacrificed themselves?"
Littlepip sighed. "Starlight. She did it before I could…"
Twilight looked at the memory gun's storage canister, complete with Starlight's memories. She cast an eternity spell on it, so it would never fade. Then she stuck it in her Pocket.
Maybe one day she would be able to give it…
The cosmos was in disarray, the galaxies had been strewn about haphazardly, and many things had been destroyed.
But the source of all that terror was contained.
The crack of Weirdmageddon over Gravity Falls sealed itself, the sky returning to its beautiful blue color.
It was over. Weirdmageddon had ended.
Rincewind, who had been Awake since the start of the Loop, still didn't come out of his hiding spot.
Compiler's note: Still one more chapter to go in this arc, folks!