Re:Make- The Last Loops
Prologue
By: ViolentBlue
Disclaimer: Re:Zero is owned by Nagatsuki Tappei as are all characters in it. These are his loops, I'm just messing around with the timeline.
There was only the darkness. Subaru felt himself floating in the abyss, once again...after another failed loop.
Where…
"Where indeed?" A voice in his head commented.
I…where...am I...this isn't a resurrection...
"You're in limbo, Subaru. Right between your death...and the next one to come." It sounded somewhat like him, but aged. Torn. Distorted. Regretful.
I have to...go back…I failed...I was caught...
"Go back? There is no going back. Look at yourself. Look at all these lost lives you've had, and nothing to show for it." The voice chided him.
I got close-
"Close? Close to what? Close to the end? Close to freeing her? Close to killing him? Close to riding off into the sunset on a pale horse with your darling Emilia-tan~? You haven't gotten close to shit."
Subaru did so, feeling himself slowly go limp. Who...who are you…
"Me? Who else but you? There's no Witch here to talk to you. She already did, remember? Sent you straight back to the beginning, to Zero. Because you can't win. You can't beat him no matter what."
No...she didn't say anything...Answer...answer me…
"Oh? Hah, you can't even remember that then. I wasn't joking, Subaru. I'm you. Natsuki Subaru. I'm the worst days of your life. I'm your broken memories. Your emptied spirit. I'm the fractured and twisted remnants of your mind, after hundreds of deaths. And I'm telling you to stop. No matter what you do you'll just get up, and die again. To him."
Subaru felt himself slip away briefly, but a spark of defiance remained. I can still go back and save them. I've gotten past everything so far, if I just…
"Can you even remember what happened in the first loop? The one where you met your precious Emilia?"
There was...an appa salesman, 3 thugs, a silver haired elf, I died…
"See? You can't recall anything. You've been through so many timelines it all just jumbles together, doesn't it."
The voice continued to speak to him. "But you don't have to worry anymore. Just fade out. Keep your eyes closed and give in. Give up. It doesn't matter what happens to your physical body outside. You don't have the strength to pull yourself together. Not after dying and resetting, over and over again. Having the Witch change your save points back in an effort to gain more time. It never worked. The...killer always caught up to you in the end. Whoever's hunting you has your number."
Subaru felt his feet touch cobblestone, even though it felt like it was a lifetime away. He'd been in this same place many times, having to start over.
"Don't do it. Your mind won't take much more. Neither will your own very soul. You'll die. And not the physical death, but the spiritual. The kind that no resurrection or healing magic can save you from. You can't even recall the loops of past timelines. That's how far you've fallen. Just...stop. Keep those eyes closed."
For a moment, he felt himself slip away, the feeling of that cobblestone, the brush of the wind through the marketplace, and the warmth of the shining summer sun on his skin as well do so. It would be so easy…
I'll...no. I have allies. I have friends. I have Ram, Puck, O-Otto, Garfiel, F-francisca, Rem. I have...E...Emilia.
"And what have they done for you? All you do is sacrifice yourself for them, over and over and over. A debt that they can never repay and do not deserve to have. You can't even tell them about Return by Death, true?"
…
"Hmph. Your silence proves the point. Now just rest. I'm trying to help you."
...No. You're not. I don't care if you're me, or someone else. I may be utterly weak and pathetic. But- I can pull myself together, one last time. Even if I'm starting over. Even if I can't quite remember everything.
"And risk losing yourself forever?"
If I give in. I've already lost.
The ground felt solid. Lugunica opened its arms to greet him once more, and in his last loops, Natsuki Subaru opened his eyes.
AN: Hello and welcome to Re:Make, a story that I'm currently planning and writing for Re:Zero. This is based on the idea if Subaru ran up against what was an unstoppable enemy, and no matter how many times he died or even through assistance from Satella he was unable to succeed. These are his last loops, as Subaru by this point is mentally hanging on by a thread, having seen so many outcomes and timelines that he can't even keep them straight anymore. It's his last chance to succeed, before he cracks forever.
Story updates will unfortunately be less frequent than I like, as I'm already working on two other fics and have university to deal with. Still, I'm very excited for this story, and while I can't promise it will be the best out there given that I am a novice compared to many out here, I hope I can create an enjoyable story out there for you all.
Thank you!