Author's Notes:

All requests from /tlhg/ that I just rolled with. I hope you guys enjoy them!

Dang, over two years since I posted a random oneshot to this thing...

Anyway, the titles give you a good idea of what each request was asking for, heh.

Disclaimer: The Loud House Copyright Nickelodeon (2021)

Lincoln, Ecchi!

"I'm telling you, Leni! There's nothing better than seeing an innocent peek at these cute girls!"

Leni giggled and looked away. Ever since Lincoln became a middle schooler he was invested in these comics he called main-gah.

"But looking at girls' in their undies is embarrassing!"

Lincoln sighed, closing his eyes and running a hand down his face.

He could try, try, and try again, but his sisters just wouldn't get it. Out of them all, he thought Leni might enjoy his newest obsession the most; with all the fashion and styles depicted in each volume.

But regardless of what he said, his sisters would take a single glance at these risque comics, and then he never heard the end of it.

"Those are perverted! You're not going to turn out right! Why look at fake, cartoon girls when you can talk to real girls at school!?"

Lincoln took a long-suffering sigh, just staring at the fourth wall. As if he had to explain the appeal of admiring 2D girls.

"Look, Leni," he started.

But then, the wind caught Leni's skirt in a small whirl.

And Lincoln suddenly saw the most breathtaking ecchi scene of his twelve year old life.

His older sister's long, luscious legs, her womanly hips, the trimmed hairs adorning her pubic mound. All of which were staples of his beloved manga.

However, Lori forgot to wash the laundry that day.

So, for just a single second - right before a beam of sunlight miraculously censored his sister's body - he saw her virgin pussy.

"Lincoln? What's wrong?"

Leni looked down and saw her skirt was fluttering in the wind.

"Eee-yahhhh! Lincoln, you pervert!"

And she punched him the fuck out.

Huge Cock Bro

Lori opened the fridge, taking out one of Lola's apple juice boxes.

Jabbing the straw in, she took a long, satisfying sip.

"Ahhh."

She walked into the living room, and stopped right in the threshold.

Taking another sip, she just stared at the couch where her brother, Lincoln, was sleeping.

And pitching a massive boner.

She stepped over to him and got out her phone. She took a few pictures of his tent from different angles, and made a mental note to compare his overall length to Bobby again.

Leni hopped down the stairs and went straight to the fridge.

"Yeeeee! There's one for me!"

She took a loooooong sip of a brand new apple juice box.

"Ahh, I love these!"

She sighed as she walked into the living room. And then, she jumped in place and balled her free hand into a fist. Shaking with energy and squeeing, she hopped over to the couch.

"Lincoln's friend is back! Say cheese!"

She leaned down to his lap, smiled at the camera, and took a selfie.

"Like, this is totes going to go viral. And, send!"

Luna enjoyed rocking out, writing lyrics, and being a lamp. But her fun activities required some serious energy, and by that she meant juice!

Fortunately, there was a few left in the fridge.

She crushed the juice box after finishing it. She headed back up the stairs, but stopped about halfway.

"Hey, bro, can you-"

She stopped.

Lincoln was sporting a seriously massive pecker.

"The fuck..."

He looked bigger than Sam, too.

Luna breathed through her teeth as she stepped over to the couch, leaned over the back, and just stared at it.

"Wow. I wonder if I told him he's not actually-"

She shook her head.

"No, don't. Mom made us promise."

Luan came in from the back door, grabbed a juice on her way to the living room, and stopped.

Taking a sip as she stared at her brother, she hatched an idea.

She grabbed her rubber chicken, which she always kept inside her skirt. Wink, wink.

Then, she hopped over, knelt on the ground, and leaned in toward his lap. She laid the chicken on top of his boner. He was so big the rubber couldn't hide his whole tent.

Getting out her phone, she took a pic.

"Huge Cock Bro" she captioned it.

Eh, maybe she could blackmail him later or something. She left the chicken cause lmao why the heck not.

Lynn jumped through the front door, kicking it in so hard the door knob smashed another hole in the wall.

"WOOO! FUCK YEAH! LYNN LOUD IS IN DA HOUSE!"

She coughed after screaming so loud, went into the fridge and snatched herself an apple juice box, then headed back into the living room.

"Dang," she said as she caught sight of her bro's big bro, "Didn't realize you were packing some heat now."

She went over to the couch and sat down by his legs. Leaning over him, she just stared at it.

And stared.

And stared some more.

"Man, I wish I could still take baths with you..."

Lynn sighed, then jumped off the couch.

"Nope! I'm not the same Lynn I used to be! This Lynn is absolutely, 100%, NOT a pervert!"

She raced up the stairs, knocking a stray Lucy into the wall so hard the emo girl's head broke through the plaster.

"Sigh."

Lucy freed herself from the wall's cursed prison.

She went into the kitchen to get some juice.

She saw there was one apple juice left.

"Sigh."

She didn't want to drink happy hippie juice. Fuck that.

She grabbed the goth's special: 100% real, organic, vampire-approved tomato juice.

"Sigh."

She went into the living room and spotted her brother lying on the couch.

Dipping her fangs into the tomato juice, she neared his neck, intent on biting him yet again...

But then, she stopped when she saw the bulge in his shorts.

"Lincoln?"

She touched the tent, and jerked back when he suddenly twitched.

"I-is this his... wow..."

She skulked away, muttering about forbidden taboo things.

Lana came in through the back door.

"Damn, today was rough," she scratched her plumber's crack.

Working on vanzilla today was rough. She kept telling the old geezer that she needed to be put down, but he just wouldn't hear it.

After spending all day frankenstein-ing her back together, Lana was bushed.

She got out the last apple juice and took a long sip.

"Man, that really hits the spot."

She stepped into the living room, and then choked.

Lincoln's boner was poking through his shorts.

But that wasn't what excited her.

"No way! Is that-"

It was.

She ran over to the couch, tossed the empty juice box onto Lincoln's chest, and grabbed the newest volume of Seton Academy.

She husbando'd the animal dudes so hard.

She just... she just can't...

And she ran off, taking the manga Lincoln fell asleep reading.

Lola came home from her pageant.

She'd been through hell and back.

The Men in Black needed her help for an undercover sting operation that busted a human trafficking scheme that spanned across the galaxy.

She'd survived not one, but two assassination attempts as well, and that was just from the school's front door to her Airforce One issued Apache waiting for her in the parking lot.

She seriously wanted her juice or she'd kill someone.

Only, the fridge was empty.

Lola screamed, ripping the door from its hinges.

She stomped her way into the living, her eyes literally two fireballs of pure, raw hatred.

And then there.

Right on the couch.

Was the last juice box.

She vanished in a moment-

And in the next she re-appeared right on top of Lincoln's legs.

The young lad finally woke up, and froze as he saw a very angry Lola standing on his thighs.

She was pointing at his chest.

Where the last juice box was sitting. Empty.

"Oh shit," was all he could say before she reached down and took his boner in her small, evil hands.

"Omae wa mou shindeiru."

Luan Watches Cartoons, Too

Luan made doubly sure that Luna wasn't going to come home tonight.

She locked the door.

Then, she moved Luna's amp in front of it.

She covered the window's blinds with a curtain.

And then, she covered the curtain with a blanket.

Sighing to herself, she then went over to her closet.

Singing a magical transformation song to herself, Luan stripped off her clothes, made several poses, and slipped into a superhero costume.

Today she was her favorite, as the 1960s Batman theme song played in the background.

Finally ready to binge more of the series she recently found, Luan hopped into bed, turned on her laptop, and went straight to pornhub.

This lusty smirk slid across her face as a naked Joker pinned a blushing Batman down on top a Gotham skyscraper.

"Yeah, finally getting to the good stuff~"

Britacoln

"Has anyone ever told you what a cute butt you have?"

Brita tried leaning away from the young boy hitting on her, but the bench was small.

She was in the park, sitting beside Lincoln. They were waiting on Leni to get back, but she and G were gone for awhile...

She gave up hope after twenty minutes passed.

But as they waited in vain for two horny teenagers to come back, Lincoln became bolder.

"L-Lincoln, don't you think you should keep your hands to yourself?"

The young guy only smirked wider.

"Playing hard to get, eh?"

Brita gulped.

No one found out yet that she was actually Rita; that she was Lincoln's mother.

And because of this deception, here she was in a very awkward situation.

"You know," Lincoln teased, running his fingers up her side, "It's not just the ass. You have cute boobs, too~"

Before she could stop him, his hand slid under her breast, cupping her with his boyish hand.

Brita moaned, and then blushed when she realized what she'd just done.

"I knew you wanted me~" Lincoln teased, squeezing her breast.

Brita shook her head, "N-no, I'm not interested-"

"Sure you aren't~"

Lincoln leaned toward her, pressing his face into her sideboob.

Brita gasped, feeling his teeth nip her shirt.

"Hey..."

She shook as she heard his voice speak into her breast.

"Why don't we ditch them? It's obvious they ain't coming back."

Brita looked away.

"I-I... I really should be go-"

Suddenly, Lincoln grabbed her hand, pulled it up to his lips, and kissed each and every one of her fingers.

"Please?"

He looked up at her with wide, pleading eyes. Fuck, she couldn't resist those eyes as his mother...

But right now she wasn't his mother. She was a teenage girl...

"L-Lincoln, I-"

Those wide, wet eyes pierced her to the soul.

She was his mother.

She couldn't let this go on.

She had to put a stop to it.

So, why... not even five minutes later... was she walking into a hotel, with her son's hand cupping her ass?