AN: I think 's issue has been resolved. What a relief! Hopefully it won't happen again.
Thank you for all the support! it is very deeply appreciated!
Metatron's lips curled upwards as Sirius curled into a ball. If the spirit could've sweat the couch would've been drenched. He'd imagined the spirit would have fainted as well.
He flapped his wings, causing the book atop the pile to flip open. Sirius let out a whine. The archangel suppressed a chuckle. He'd learned more than a few intimidation tricks as a prosecutor, and wasn't afraid to pull them out when necessary.
"What, uh, brings you here?" Sirius whined.
"I came because I was quite disturbed by the actions of you and your, uh," Metatron's left wing twitched, "companion. Is that what you'd call Severus?"
"I guess, I mean." Sirius gulped. "I guess he's my companion."
"Very well then." Metatron retracted his wings. "The actions of you and your companion are disturbing me."
"Why?" If Metatron's hearing wasn't perfect he would not have been able to hear Sirius' voice. "Hermione seems to be happy."
"Happy?"
Sirius nodded.
"Do you think she's happy?"
"Yes, I think she is getting closer to." Sirius' glow shook. "Eudaimonia. I think that's what it's called."
"Oh." Metatron's eyes widened. "She's on the verge of achieving eudaimonia."
Sirius nodded.
"My, that changes everything then, doesn't it," he approached the couch.
The spirit pulled himself upwards.
"I mean, you must know everything about eudaimonia. You've had enough time to study it."
"I've tried to."
"Tell me, since you know so much about eudaimonia," Metatron stopped when he was a meter from Sirius. He pointed to a book on the floor. "Have you read Nicomachean Ethics?"
"Yes, I did two months ago."
"Really." Metatron picked up the book and handed it to Sirius. "Show me the page where fusing with another soul and romancing her is the key to eudaimonia."
"Well," Sirius took the book. "Book X discusses the varieties of friendship. That's about relationships, so it counts."
Metatron hummed.
"Friends are supposed to help each other grow in virtue. It doesn't always happen though. Some friendships are built on utility, deeper ones on pleasure, but true friends help each other grow in virtue."
"So that's what's going on with Hermione then?" Metatron's expression was impassive. "You and Severus are her true friends helping her grow in virtue?"
"Severus is anyway."
"How is he being a friend to her exactly?"
"Well, I've helped Severus learn how to talk to her, so they can create potions, cook, and help her get her confidence back."
"Impressive."
"It is." Sirius' glow was a light yellow. "She's found a purpose in life."
"I see."
"She's thriving with Severus' help. I don't think she's ever been happier."
"I suppose her happiness was the goal, now wasn't it? If she's happy then she must be closer to eudaimonia, correct?"
"Yes." Sirius sat up straighter.
"And what do you do in the meantime?" Metatron glanced at his fingernails. "You watch as Harry takes his son into her store so you can see him, you get to relive your casanova days, and for the cherry on top, you get to avoid a lengthy Purgatory sentence and may get some time off from it. This sounds like the perfect afterlife for you."
"It's been a nice program." Sirius had a hint of a grin.
"A nice program?"
"Yes."
"What about your spiritual enlightenment? Have you grown to regret any of your actions?"
"I mean." Sirius bowed his head. "I was a little mean to Severus."
"A little mean?" Metatron drawled.
Sirius looked up.
"You hung a man from a tree, mocked him, and exposed him, yet all you have to say for yourself is that you were a little mean?" Metatron frowned.
"Okay, I was cruel, and awful."
"You laughed in the middle of your Purgatory trial!"
Sirius jerked back from the power of the archangel's voice.
"Do you honestly expect me to believe that the man who laughed during his Purgatory trial is suddenly reformed within the span of a decade and a few months?"
"I have changed." Sirius sat erect. "I'm trying to help Severus help Hermione. That shows how much I've changed."
"How is making Hermione emotionally dependent upon Severus going to help anyone?"
Sirius closed his mouth.
"I sincerely love Peter and Dismas, but they are too distracted to see the obvious."
"What would that be?"
"That you are taking this time as your personal vacation at Hermione's expense."
"But we're making her happy."
"Will she be happy when the Trinity pulls the plug on all of this?"
Sirius turned white. "They want to pull this plug on this?"
"Perhaps not now." Metatron admitted. "The Trinity is infinitely patient after all."
Sirius relaxed.
"They are also all-knowing, and can be quite wrathful when they are taken advantage of. The second they suspect they've been crossed is the second they revert to their Old Testament ways if you know what I mean."
"We're not taking advantage of them. We're only trying to do the work they assigned us."
"How?"
"It's complicated, but I'm serious, Hermione is gaining eudaimonia."
"She's gaining a fantasy land where Severus Snape will share a domestic life with her despite the fact that we both know that isn't possible," Metatron argued. "What does that have to do with eudaimonia?"
Sirius wrung his hands.
"I will be the first to admit that I am not the Trinity, but I am the voice of God for a few reasons, and not only because I speak to them for mortals. I am more free to express the things they are often too merciful to say without overstepping my bounds. It is the reason I am widely considered the best prosecutor heaven has ever seen." There was a predatory gleam in Metatron's eyes.
"You are amazing." Sirius squeaked. "I was very impressed with the job you did at my trial. If I ever needed a prosecutor I would hire you."
"Would you now?" Metatron grinned.
Sirius nodded.
"I'll remember that when you're back in Purgatory watching your life over again. In fact," his right wing fluttered. "I'll consider it my crowning achievement."
"As you should." Sirius' glow pulsated.
"Back to my initial point though," Metatron's gleam returned. "The Trinity is not going to tolerate this ridiculousness forever. They are going to reach the same conclusion I have, namely that Hermione is living in a fantasy that is going to come crashing down upon her when this program ends."
"What if Severus is her soulmate though?"
Metatron glared at him as if he'd just asked if angels had wings.
"What if she and Severus were never given a chance, and the Trinity is making sure they get one?" His voice was stronger.
"First of all, there is no such thing as soulmates. Even you know that."
Sirius' eyes widened. "There isn't?"
"No, that's something mortals made to amuse themselves. The Trinity is busy enough as it is. They don't have time to ensure the correct mortals are romantically involved with each other."
Sirius deflated as if he'd just announced Father Christmas did not exist.
"Second of all, if the Trinity wanted Severus and Hermione together they would have found a way to do so by now. They wouldn't put on this farce just to bring," He made scare quotes. "'True love' into the world."
Sirius turned blue.
"If I were you, I would seriously consider this entire mission and its trajectory. Your course of action is not sustainable. Even you are intelligent enough to admit that."
He lowered his head.
"Sirius?"
Metatron turned around and examined the soul wearing a tuxedo. The archangel had to admit, he was handsome. It wasn't difficult to imagine why Hermione would become overly attached to him.
"Excuse me, but who are you?"
He was brave too. Nobody other than Theresa had spoken to him in such a dry tone upon their first meeting.
It was a pity this man was fusing with mortals. Metatron could see them becoming close friends otherwise.
"Did Dismas send you?" Severus asked.
"Excuse me. Where are my manners?" Mutation extended his hand. "My name is Metatron, I was the prosecutor for Sirius' trial."
"I see." The other spirit's glow remained steady as he shook it. "My name is Severus Snape."
"I know, Dismas told me about you," Metatron spread out his wings as he released Severus. "I also got a good view of you last night seducing Hermione."
Severus was as pale as Metatron's wings.
"I will tell you what I told him," Metatron continued. "Your goal is to bring Hermione happiness, not emotionally invest her in a fantasy even you know you cannot live out. Remember that the next time you interact with her."
"Did Dismas tell you to come?" Severus asked in a weak voice.
"No."
"Did the Trinity send you?" Sirius asked.
"If the Trinity sent me, you would know." Metatron looked up at the sky. "I do apologize, but I have court momentarily."
"Good luck," Sirius began.
"I don't need luck, only grace and skill." Metatron raised his wings higher. "Something you two are in desperate need of developing."
With that, Metatron vanished.