Chapter 8
TRIS POV:
When I open my eyes Saturday morning, it takes me a few minutes to remember where I am. White walls, white ceiling, faded soft quilt on the bed, nothing but a lamp on the nightstand, and a small dresser across the room, but I can smell bacon and cinnamon rolls so that narrows it down. Grandmas never let you go hungry, and mine is no exception to the Grandma rule. I roll out of bed and head up the stairs to see if I can help with breakfast.
Mom is already in the kitchen helping, and Gram assures me there isn't room for another set of hands, so I settle in at the breakfast nook to read the paper and sip my orange juice. It feels so decadent to have someone else make eggs and bacon for me, but I try to enjoy it. While she cooks, Gram starts to fill me in on the 'news' of the town. 'News' is a nice way of saying 'gossip.' Gram knows everyone and everything that happens in this town, and when she settles in to tell you the 'news' it isn't so much a conversation as it is an informational report, so I just sit back with my orange juice and listen.
"Betty Parker is about to pop with those twins she is carrying, I swear she won't make it two more weeks like Dr. Willis keeps telling her. What do Doctors know of these things anyway? Old Mr. Carver has finally sold his farm, but the new owner, Mr. Hix, has promised to keep doing the corn maze for the Festival each year. He knows if he didn't he would be the most hated man in Colfax, no doubt. Evelyn Johnson has had your Pop down at the community center most Saturdays this summer putting together activities for the town kids. They're continuing it now that school has started but are also offering tutoring help for school. You should go see her if you have time while you're in town, dear. What are you and your mom gonna do today since you're visiting?" At last, she comes up for air and I have an opportunity to respond.
"I don't know, Gram. We didn't make any specific plans. I did think I'd call Susan Black this morning and see if she wants to go for a run later and catch up, but Mom and I would have the rest of the day and tomorrow. Why don't we go to the store and get steaks to grill for dinner? It might be one of the last weekends where the weather is really nice to cook out."
"That will be nice. I saw Susan's dad at the gas station last week, he said she has been very lonely this summer without you. I'll have your Pop make up his famous marinade for those steaks. Thank you."
"Really? Susan's facebook looks like she has been having a great summer."
"That facebook isn't real! No one posts the bad stuff, only the good. So of course it looks like she is having a blast, doesn't it. You should definitely call her when you finish your breakfast."
I insist on cleaning up the breakfast dishes since no one would let me help with preparing the meal. When the kitchen was spotless and tidy I called Susan from the front room. We make plans to meet for a run in a few hours and run down to the old train trestle bridge like we used to before I moved away.
We agreed to meet at the gazebo in the middle of the town square and my mind is wandering as I walk over to wait for her. The gazebo was donated to the town about four years ago through the combined fundraising efforts of the Girl scouts, Boy scouts, Rotary Club, Kiwanis Club, VFW, Moose Lodge, and multiple bake sales held by the high school students at every sporting event for a year. Being a small town is hard sometimes.
A funny thing happened to the town after the gazebo was built, though. Because so many people were involved in the fundraising, it feels like the gazebo belongs to everyone in the town and has become a special place that everyone is proud of. Every Valentine's Day since it was built, at least one couple gets engaged there, and who knows how many first kisses have happened underneath the fairy lights that are strung up the lattice work into the rafters. There is even a time capsule from 2016 buried under the west steps.
I am sitting on the steps (yes the time capsule steps) when Susan walks over from her house. We start stretching and then take off toward the water tower at a jog so it will be easy to keep up conversation.
She looks the same as she did at the beginning of the summer, but I remember what Gram said about her having been sad. "Susan, tell me how your first week was?"
"Oh it was pretty good. We all miss you of course, the soccer team is going to be good I think. Everyone from last year is back again except for you so we already have pretty good chemistry, you know?"
"Yeah, I know. I wish I felt that way at my new school. A big part of me wishes that I was still here. I made the team at McArthur, but I don't know many of the girls yet, and I likely won't get much playing time as a newcomer sophomore. Plus Coach Bullock is really demanding, I think he might have actually tried to kill us running sprints at tryouts, just to weed out the duds."
"How do you like your classes?"
"Actually, the classes are pretty good. Much bigger than here, I think there are more students in the school than there are people in Colfax. It's so easy to get lost, I was lucky. There is a really nice guy in my homeroom class. His name is Uriah and we have about half of our classes together. He introduced me to all his friends. I tested out of a year of Spanish since we had it here last year, so I am the only sophomore in Spanish 2...which would normally suck, but Four is there and he introduced me to his friend Shauna. She is on the soccer team, and in turn introduced me to the two team captains from last year. The people have been very welcoming."
"That all sounds great! Let's rewind a hot minute and how about you tell me about this 'Nice guy, Uriah' in your homeroom class? Is he cute as well as friendly? What does he look like? Is he single?"
"Hahaha, Susan you are still just as boy-crazy as ever aren't you?"
"It's not my fault that I live in a boy desert, is it? I am starved for legitimate romantic potential here and have no choice but to live vicariously through you. I don't know what I will do when prom rolls around this year."
"I am sure you'll figure something out. There are boys at school after all."
"Yeah, boys I have known since they'd pick their boogers and wipe them on their desk. Really hard to imagine kissing one of those in the moonlight."
"I am definitely not in a boy desert now, but it doesn't make it any easier. I actually got asked out three times last week, well sortof."
"What! Three times? How do you 'sortof' get asked out?"
"Well, first this guy Al, in my Art class asked me to go see a movie. Then the next period, in Anatomy, Will was talking to me about being on the swim team and he offered to help me with swimming when I told him I wasn't very good at it. Four overheard the conversation. He is in that class too, and told me later that Will was actually asking me out, or trying to anyway. I had no idea at the time of course."
"Ok, so that's two… who is Four?"
"Four is the third one, and the 'sortof'."
"Explain."
"Ok, here are the bullet points." I count them off on my fingers as we run, "His dad and mine work together. The Eatons live in our neighborhood. Four is a Junior at McArthur and he drives me to and from school. Our dads are conspiring to fix us up."
"What? Your dad has never cared about you dating before has he? Why does he want you to go out with his co-worker's kid? And why can't this guy get his own dates? Is he that big of a loser?"
"He's not a loser. He is a good student, he's a pitcher on the baseball team and he is on the paper too."
"Is he ugly?"
"Nope, he's basically gorgeous."
"He must be a jerk then. No one cool and good looking is nice as well, you know the rule of the triangle."
Ah yes, the Rule of the Triangle… Susan has a theory that no one can be the trifecta of: Good Looking, Nice, and Popular, but she is wrong, and I can prove it in the person of one Tobias Eaton. "Susan, I swear, he is the white whale of guys, the trifecta exists. To top it all off, he is the one who told me about our dad's scheme so I wouldn't be caught off guard at the dinner the four of us went to. He is nice and sweet, smart and considerate, funny and sensitive, and good looking to boot! All of these things, and for the life of me, I can't figure out why he is even considering going along with this crazy idea of our dads."
By now we have rounded the water tower and headed west toward the train trestle bridge over the creek.
"Why is it crazy if you like him and he likes you?"
"It is crazy, because he is a Junior, well established in the school and amazing. He could have anyone he wanted. Why would he want me?"
"Now you're the crazy one Beatrice! Why wouldn't he want you? You don't see yourself the way others do, you never have. You are smart, and kind, and funny, and caring and wonderful in a hundred ways. I'm sure that is what he sees in you."
"You didn't say pretty."
"What?"
"You didn't say I was pretty. I am not exaggerating when I say he is good looking. I saw him running last Saturday and noticed him then, even before I knew who he was. He could have anyone, I have no idea why he would pick me."
"Of course you are pretty, you have that long thick blonde hair, and your eyes - I've never known anyone but you with grey eyes! You are being too hard on yourself, putting too much weight on your physical appearance, and that isn't like you. Everyone knows that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, it fades over time and the most beautiful person with an ugly heart can never be anything but ugly. You, my friend, have a beautiful heart and it shows through everything you do, including your face. So no more of that talk, please."
"Thank you Susan. I hadn't realized how insecure I had become. You are right, none of these things used to bother me. I wonder if it is just the pressure of starting at a new school and having to find my place all over again. Does that make sense?"
"It makes sense, but you can't be someone you aren't. You have to find your own place as Beatrice."
"Tris. I call myself Tris there."
"Oh, Tris. I like that. Ok, but Tris is still who you are right?"
"Yes, it's the real me. I was Beatrice here, because everyone here has known me since I was in diapers, and known my parents before me. I never had a chance to evolve here. So starting fresh in Chicago, I don't have to live up to anyone's expectations of me, I can just live up to my own and be me: Tris."
"See! That's what you need to tell yourself the next time you think you aren't as pretty as some other girl. You have something she doesn't have, and whatever that is, is the thing that all these guys are attracted to."
"That thing, is the fact that I am new. Once I am old news all that extra attention I got this week will fade away."
"Do you want it to?"
"I told Al that I was going out of town this weekend, to here, so I couldn't go see a movie with him. To soften the blow, I suggested we all go out to see a movie or something next weekend, the whole group of friends from the lunch table. I wanted to let him down easy, as he is a nice guy, but I don't see him that way. I just don't want to burn bridges my first week you know?"
"Ok, so what about the swimmer guy?"
"I didn't have to answer him. The teacher called the class to order, or he turned to talk to Four. I forget now, but with it getting colder, I can easily stall the swimming lessons if necessary. I am also pretty sure that one of the other girls in our class has a huge crush on Will, and I'd rather see them go out than he and I."
"That just leaves your betrothed."
"My what? Oh please, it's not an arranged marriage!"
"Might as well be! Your life is infinitely more exciting than mine and it's only one week into school! You will have to call me and keep me up to date on your many men and soap opera life in the big city. Are you going to go out with him though, Four? What's that short for anyway?"
"I don't know what it stands for, he hasn't told me, and I don't know if we will go out or not. We talked about it the other night, but we are happy being friends for now. He said he was happy spending time with me and he would depend on me to tell him what I want and when I want it."
"Wow!"
"I know! What am I supposed to do with that? Doesn't he realize I have no idea what I want or how to ask for it?"
"Oh, I'm sure you'll know when you know."
"You sound just like my mother!"
"Then they are wise words indeed. Race you back to the gazebo?"
"You're on!"
When we get back to the park, and are walking in circles to cool down and catch our breath from laughing and running, I realize that most of our run we only talked about me. "Susan, tell me how you've been the last few weeks. We only talked about me before."
"That is because nothing has changed here. I still work at the Bowling Alley on the weekends now that school has started. The pool is closed for the season. School and soccer practice are my life now. Mom and Dad and Robert are all good. Nothing new to report from the town, except that they are planning an expanded corn maze for the Festival now that Mr. Hix bought the Carver farm. You have to come back down for that! Maybe you can bring your new boyfriends. Think your grandpa will let them sleep in the house?"
"Oh Susan, you're impossible! I would like to come back for the Festival though, I've never missed one."
We say goodbye and I promise to call more often. I do really miss talking to her. As I walk back to the house I think about her suggestion to come back for the Fall Festival. I am sure Dad would let me come if I asked, and I'll mention it to my mom about inviting some friends from school. Maybe we can make it a huge sleepover, there is enough room to separate boys and girls… assuming anyone wants to come.
The rest of the weekend passes quietly. We make meals together and talk and share stories while we eat. Mom and I stayed up late watching chick flicks, since Dad doesn't like them and I feel weird watching romantic movies with him anyway. I don't know when it happened, but somehow my frayed nerves from the week all seem to smooth out. My mom has always had that effect on me, and I tell her as much Sunday night before getting on the train.
"Oh, Beatrice, I am glad to hear it. This weekend has been such a treat, spending a little time just the two of us. I am looking forward to the semester being over and joining you and your father in Chicago. I also look forward to meeting this young man I have heard so much about."
"Four?"
"Well, yes Four. Who else would I mean?"
"Oh, of course you mean Four. Yes, I am sure you will meet him when you're in Chicago."
Just then the announcement for the next train departing blared over the PA system. It was time for me to board and our conversation was cut short. Mom gave me one more long tight hug. I clung to her and breathed in the smell of her shampoo. This would have to hold me for a few weeks before I could see her again.
"I love you mom. I'll let you know when Dad and I get home, and I will call you this week." I say, and turn to board the train.
Mom just presses her fingers to her lips and throws me a kiss when she sees me seated at the window. A few minutes later the train starts rolling and I am headed back to Chicago.