Monday: January 16, 2012 5:19 PM

I was alone in the bedroom as Randy was cooking our dinner for tonight. I looked over at the boxes of letters and decided to read one while Randy was still cooking for us. I grab the letter numbered sixteen.

Date: July 2, 1999

Dear Marissa, Happy seventeenth birthday. I love you so much.

I can't believe how much you've grown up. I know it's been about fourteen years since I last saw you, but I just can't stop picturing you as that little three year old girl.

I don't know much about what you've been up to. All I know is that you have still been doing fantastic in soccer and volleyball, as well as your academics, and that you are working a part time job at a local coffee shop there in Saint Louis. Your grandmother doesn't know much about what's going on in your lives anymore, so I don't get to hear much about you or Tyler.

Next year, you will obviously be turning eighteen. I think I'm going to try to find a way to reach out to you and Tyler since you will both legally be adults and your father can't stop you if you'd agree to see me. If he could, he probably would. I wouldn't blame him.

I don't know how I'll do it, but I'll see you and Tyler again sooner than later. See you then.

Love, Mom

I put the letter back down, confused about how if she intended on reaching out, that she didn't until I was in WWE. I pick up the letter numbered seventeen to read as well since Randy still is cooking.

Date: July 2, 2000

Dear Marissa, Happy eighteenth birthday. You're an adult now.

Since you're an adult now, even though you may never see this, I think it's time that I confessed to some things.

I cheated on your father, Richard Smith, more times than I could count. I'm not happy about that. I'm quite ashamed of that to this day, even after fifteen years of being away from him, Tyler, and you.

Richard is Tyler's biological father, but he isn't yours. In October of 1981, I went out to a local bar with some girls I was friends with. A wealthy businessman from out of town was there with his buddies as well. Richard and I were barely speaking at the time, and I was very upset. I had caught this businessman's attention, so he bought me and the girls some drinks and started flirting with me. I ended up going with him back to his hotel that night, and you were conceived. That businessman is your biological father. At the time, I didn't know he was. I soon found out who he was, a businessman who worked in professional wrestling who was also married. It made me even more ashamed of what I had done. That's all I'll say about him personally. I won't even mention his name.

As far as I'm concerned, Richard is your father. I found out in November that I was pregnant with you. It was impossible that you were Richard's. I immediately told Richard that I, Janine Barnes, had cheated on him and was pregnant with a child that couldn't be his. It broke his heart that I cheated on him, as that was the first time it happened, but he stayed with me and promised to help raise you as if you were his child. He has been the parent around for you during your whole life, so he is your father.

I don't know if Richard has told or will tell you about that. I think you should know, but don't consider Richard your father any less.

A few years later, during another time I had cheated on Richard, I was with a man named David. I fell in love with David and conceived your younger brother Colby. I did a very irresponsible thing and ran away with David, only leaving a note for Richard to tell him not to come looking for me. David and I got married, and I gave birth to Colby. However, I know I handled the situation poorly.

I just hope you're better than I am as a person. That's all I hope for.

Love, Mom

I put the letters away. It was weird reading about what pretty much led to me being conceived. I laid back on the bed for about two minutes before I received a phone call. I grab my phone to answer.

Me: "Hello?"

Chelle: "Hey, is everything alright? I haven't heard from you since Wednesday. Neither have Eve or Ryse. Eve also said you're not at Raw tonight."

Me: "I'm fine. Randy and I have just been taking some time to ourselves to figure some things out and not really talking to too many other people."

Chelle: "What things are you figuring out?"

Me: "Well, Randy and I are taking a break from trying to conceive, and I'm going to be competing again at least through WrestleMania. I just have to fill out some paperwork about changes to what I'm doing backstage and send it to Vince. Don't tell anyone other than our close friends though. I'm trying to keep it quiet right now."

Chelle: "That's good for you. Randy is okay with the break from trying to conceive?"

Me: "It was a hard conversation to have, but he is. It's been hard on him just as much as it's been hard on me. We're not going to worry about it for a few months. I'm just a little worried about it potentially impacting our relationship."

Chelle: "Have you watched that documentary DVD that WWE put out about Randy?"

Me: "No, we obviously have a copy, but never got around to watching it."

Chelle: "Watch it whenever you have time and listen to what the two of you say about each other. After that, your worries should go away."

Me: "Will it make me cry?"

Chelle: "Potentially. How are you holding up since the break in?"

Me: "I still am a little shook up from it, but I haven't been too bad. Randy has been with me pretty much all the time since then though."

Chelle: "That's good to know. I'm going to go now. I know you probably need to cook dinner soon."

Me: "Actually, Randy is cooking dinner right now. It should be done pretty soon though."

Chelle: "Oh. Good for him. I'm gonna go. Bye."

Me: "Bye."

The call ends. I sit on the bed.

Randy walks in. "Dinner is done. Something's up."

I shake my head. "I read letters. Just got off the phone with Chelle."

"So it took five days of us not talking to our friends for someone to reach out? You win that bet."

I smile. "I know."

"What was the deal with the letters?"

"Mom finally mentions Vince, without saying his name though. You're a little behind on reading them, so you'll have to read and catch up with me."

"What's the last one you read?"

"Number seventeen."

"Geez. The last one I read was number eleven."

"You are gonna have to read those other six."

"Definitely. Let's go eat dinner."

"Right behind you."

Randy and I were on the couch, watching Raw from home. Jack Swagger had just pinned Zack Ryder, who wasn't even supposed to be cleared to compete, for the United States Championship.

Randy shakes his head. "This isn't right."

I roll my eyes. "No kidding. John Laurinaitis is so out of line."

"I hope Swagger gets his ass kicked."

"Maybe I'll do it. I am a former United States Champion."

"That's true. How long was your reign?"

"Seventy-seven days."

"Not bad."

They show Eve and Zack confronting John Laurinaitis backstage. Eve starts telling John Laurinaitis off.

"Yes, Eve!" I say. "You tell him!"

"Man," Randy comments. "How many people in our friend group have told him off now?"

"That's at least half of us now. You, Cena, Eve, and me."

"Good for her."

I roll my eyes as John Laurinaitis tells Eve to shut her mouth and respect the authority. "He's being so ridiculous."

"No kidding."

A Divas Tag Team match between the Bella Twins and the team of Kelly Kelly and Alicia Fox starts.

Randy puts his arm around me. "You could beat all four of them in the ring. They aren't prepared for you to come back."

I smile. "I have beaten all four of them. They aren't ready though. You're right. I want to make an impact when I start competing again. They'll never see it coming."

I grab my phone to text Eve.

Me: Randy and I are watching Raw. Tell Ryder to take his complaints about John Laurinaitis to the higher ups.

"Who are you texting?" Randy asks as I put my phone back down.

"Eve." I reply. "I told her to tell Zack Ryder to take his complaints to the higher ups."

"That's a good idea."

After the main event of Raw, Randy and I watch as not only does John Laurinaitis admit that he is going to screw CM Punk out of the WWE Championship at Royal Rumble, but he also punches Mick Foley.

"Oh damn." I comment. "This could be what does it."

"You're still going to return to competing, right?" Randy asks.

"Yeah, if John Laurinaitis loses his job while I'm competing, then Teddy Long can take it over at least until I'm done. I'm gonna send Punk a text really quick."

"Okay."

Me: Seems like John Laurinaitis is having a lot of problems this week.

Before I can even put my phone down, I get a phone call.

"It's Eve." I tell Randy before answering the call.

Me: "Hey, what's up?"

Eve: "You've seen all the dumb stuff that John Laurinaitis has done tonight, right?"

Me: "Yes, why?"

Eve: "There's more. Chelle tells me that you're gonna be competing again. Is that true?"

Me: "It is. What's going on?"

Eve: "John Laurinaitis decided to make an eight Diva Elimination Tag Team match at Royal Rumble. It's the Bella Twins, Natalya, and Beth versus Kelly, Alicia, me, and, as John Laurinaitis put it, whoever the hell would actually be willing to fight Beth Phoenix with us. I haven't even mentioned to Kelly and Alicia that you are coming back to wrestle, and it's hard to find someone to trust. Would you want to take the final spot?"

Me: "Eve, are you asking me to wrestle and spite John Laurinaitis all at once at one of the biggest pay per views of the year in my hometown?"

Eve: "I am, Rissa."

Me: "Count me in. Only tell Alicia and Kelly though. I want it to be a surprise. Plus, we don't want the opposing team finding out. Do we?"

Eve: "We don't. Works for me. Thank you so much, Rissa."

Me: "No problem, Eve. Talk to you later."

Eve: "Bye, Rissa."

I end the call before looking at Randy. "I just got my return match set up for Royal Rumble."