Wednesday night.
Annie was curled up on the couch for one last night in Seattle before she headed home. It would be a couple months before she could come back down and Teddy's schedule had a few free weekends coming up.
"I don't really want to go home," Annie said.
Teddy questioned, "why is that?"
"I feel safer here," Annie said.
"What do you mean," asked Teddy.
"When I'm here I can focus on school work and learning," Annie replied, "life is easier. No sister."
"You really have a hard time with Jessica don't you," Teddy said, "what happens with your sister?"
"Jessie has two diagnoses that make it hard for us to get along. I'm really trying but some times it's too hard, that's why I like living at school," Annie said.
"I worry about you that you don't talk about it," Teddy said.
"I have my counselor and go every other week," Annie said, "I know I have to go to build my coping strategies. I'm working on setting and sticking to my boundaries with her."
"I don't like that you have to go through with this but I'm really happy you feel safe here," Teddy said, "how do you usually deal with it?"
"It's fine as long as I don't see her," Annie said, " I know tomorrow night after being here will be rough. She was really jealous I got to come down she wanted to take time off two. She can't make up her mind, first she thinks I'm worthless for being adopted but now the more time I spend with you she's getting jealous."
"Why don't you go back to school," asked Teddy, "it doesn't solve the problem with Jessie but does give calm down time for both of you."
"I need to do laundry and get my ski gear," Annie replied, "but I wanted to spend some time with mom."
"Grab your ski stuff and do your laundry at school," Teddy said, "see your mom on the weekend."
"I could I'm meeting David at school anyway, then he's driving up to Cypress," Annie said.
"He's driving," Teddy asked.
"My car isn't great on mountain roads, he says he has a truck," Annie replied.
Teddy kept questioning, "have you talked to David this week?"
"We've been messaging through facebook," Annie said, "you just didn't notice last night because you were flirting with Owen."
Teddy retorted, "I was not flirting."
"You were," Annie teased, " all sparkly, shiny google eyed flirting. He was doing it two."
"We do not flirt," Teddy said.
"You both flirt," Annie said, "he needs to dump Christina and face the facts that you are supposed to be together. It was awkward to watch."
"Is that why you went to your room to do homework," Teddy asked.
Annie laughed, "watching your mom flirt with her best friend is awkward."
"That's just how Owen and I are," Teddy said we always have been, "people have tried to pair us for years. Since we first got to Iraq but first there was Beth, now there's Christina. I'm permanently in the friendzone with him."
"Then change it," Annie said, "show him that you belong with him. Or I have a bunch of Taylor Swift songs you can play every time your in the OR with him."
"No Taylor Swift," Teddy said, "one day things with Christina will run their course. She's young, shiny and brilliant but she's selfish and driven. She won't give him what he wants."
"What is that," Annie asked.
"Kids a family, a home something calm and steady," Teddy said.
"You want another baby," Annie asked.
"With the right person I want a second child," Teddy said.
"Second," Annie asked, looking very puzzled.
Teddy pointed at Annie , "oldest daughter, first baby, child number one, how ever you want to put it."
"Really," Annie said, "but I've only known you a few months."
"Just because you were raised by your mom and dad doesnt mean you're not my daughter," Teddy said.
"They can share," Annie laughed , "there are three of us after all."
Teddy BC changed the subject, "so Friday's skiing date what are you going to wear?"
Annie paused, "it's hard to know. My coat is red and my pants are black. But I don't know about underneath. I get cold really easily. I hate the hashimotos for that."
"Are you still always cold," asked Teddy.
"Only when I ski or if I get really tired," Annie replied , "but the hospital is cold. Next time I come watch can I bring a sweater into the gallery?"
"You can or do what a lot of the residents do, put a long sleeved shirt under your scrub top," Teddy replied, but Friday. Warm and cute. That's tricky. How much do we like this boy?"
Annie blushed, "I want to kiss him."
"So really like," Teddy said, "we need to show him how cute you are so full date make up is a must. Hair?"
"French braids," Annie said , "they fit under my helmet without getting messy. But what do I wear?"
"Yoga pants not sweats," Teddy declared, "your petite sweats make you look bulky and like you have no bum."
Annie replied, "I have a pair of Lululemon ones and a warm lululemon sweatshirt."
Teddy smiled, "lululemon is good. What colour is the sweatshirt?"
"I have green, red, pink, black and purple," Annie replied.
"Go with the black it's neutral," Teddy advised.
"I have a cute red and white striped thermal top," Annie said.
Teddy asked, "how bulky?"
"It's a thermal so it's snug," Annie replied , "I'd rather ski in a sports bra, is that okay?"
"I would wear a sports bra, you'll be more comfortably," Teddy said.
"What do we talk about in the car," Annie asked.
"Have you dated before," Teddy asked.
"Only TJ in high school. We dated in grade 11 and 12 but we broke up the summer after grade 12," Annie said.
"What happened," asked Teddy.
"He went to Manitoba for bible college. He wants to be a pastor and I went to UBC for pre med," Annie said, "he didn't want to do long distance. Plus his mom thought I was too ambitious."
"Did you ever spend the night with TJ," asked Teddy.
"No. A lot of our friends were allowed to have sleep overs but neither of our parents were okay with it. He wasn't even allowed in my room," Annie said, "I couldn't go upstairs at his house. Plus we both took the chastity pledge."
Teddy questioned, "chastity pledge."
"We did it at a youth group retreat. They made everyone promise to be pure until marriage," Annie said.
"It sounds good when you make the pledge. I did in high school," Teddy said , "then one day you'll meet a guy that you want to do more than kiss and that's healthy."
"It wouldn't be wrong," Annie asked.
Teddy smiled at Annie, "if you really love him with your whole heart and trust him completely it's right. Your heart will tell you if it's right. And it's always your choice. Just be safe about it and if you have any questions please ask me. Don't google or ask friends."
" I'd like to get David to kiss me," Annie said.
"You could kiss him," Teddy said.
Annie giggles, " on the chair lift?"
"Fun but no," Teddy said, "make it special. Let him kiss you first."
"I don't know what to talk to him about," Annie said, "TJ didn't talk much. We skied, walked the dogs, rode his horses and went for bike rides. He wasn't a big talker, he was more of a thinker."
"What do you know about him," asked Teddy.
"He's in my chem class, from Toronto, likes to be outside, is doing a minor in English lit," Annie said.
"Lit minor you both like to read," Teddy said , "books are a safe topic."
"I'm glad we're skiing gives us something to do and to talk about," Annie said.
"What are you nervous about," asked Teddy.
"I don't want him to see what a nerd I am," Annie said.
"So what will you say you did all week," Teddy asked ,"you've done some cool stuff this week."
"I'm going to say I spent time with you and observed at the hospital," Annie said.
"Will you tell him about scrubbing in," Teddy pressed.
"If it comes up and doesn't feel weird," Annie said, "reading week isn't supposed to be a fun party week. That I was here to learn and spend time with family should go over okay."
"True it was a learning week," Teddy said , "I liked having you here for a few days."
"I don't like that I can't come down until after finals," Annie said.
"I may be able to come up and see you. I'll know when I get my call schedule," Teddy said, "I'll talk to Derek maybe I can get a few days off around Easter."
"I'd like that," Annie said, "it's right before finals. Maybe just things are going well, you can meet David."
"I'd like that but why me," asked Teddy.
"You're cooler than mom and dad and less scary," Annie said.
Teddy laughed , "your army major birth mom is less scary than your school principal dad?"
"But you don't look as scary," Annie said.
"Even if we tell him I'm a surgeon," Teddy said , "it's intimidating. "
"I'm worried he'll realize what a nerd I am and decide I'm a waste of time," Annie said.
"He won't. Just be yourself and he'll love you," teddy assured Annie.
"But me is really dorky," Annie said.
"My girl who has spent this week in the OR and skills lab. Who wins every competition she attends. You made Christina Yang like you, and she barely tolerates me," Teddy said.
"But that's not trying to spend time with a boy I like," Annie whined.
"As long as you leave the turtle shell at home you'll be fine," Teddy said , "you haven't needed it all week."
"I wanted it a few times. Some of the residents intimidate me," Annie said.
"Who," Teddy asked.
"Alex, Meredith, Jackson and Lexi," Annie replied.
Teddy laughed, "you couldn't pick two more opposites to like April and Christina."
"April talks to me like a friend and Christina shows me cool stuff and how to do it. Plus we got to know her in a quiet environment," Annie said.
"You're not a big group person are you," Teddy asked.
"Not at all," Annie said.
"Those are the residents you've had one on one time with," Teddy smiled.
"Next time I'm down can I work with April again," Annie asked.
Teddy replied , "I'll see what I can do but Christina for sure. You'll see her and Owen when your down. He called himself Uncle Owen yesterday. "
"That would make him the coolest of all my uncles," Annie replied, "but it's a close race."
Teddy asked , "who is the close second?"
"Uncle Jay," Annie said , "we go fishing and prawning and I'm usually on his boat with him and auntie Kristen at the fishing camp. We sing the Beatles and Elton John."
"So surgery or fishing that's what it takes to be your favorite uncle," Teddy laughed , "I'll tell Owen."
They chatted for a while longer then both headed to bed tired after their whirlwind few days. Teddy realized how much she liked having Annie in the cottage. She would be happy to have Annie move in full time for medical school if she got into the University of Washington. But she may need another bathroom if that happened. Teddy came out of the bathroom and looked at the door of what was her guest room but she was beginning to think of it as Annie's room. The lights were off except for the bedside lamp and Annie appeared to be reading a novel and texting someone. The giggle told Teddy she was probably talking to David.
That night Teddy has a very vivid dream about her mom. She hadn't had one since she met Owen her first weeks in Iraq.
"Teddy," June Altman called.
"Mommy," asked Teddy.
"Mommy, you haven't called me that since you were seven," June smiled, "how's our girl Teddy Bear?"
"Oh mom," Teddy whispered , "she's everything I dreamed of. She's happy and smart and kind. She's the sweetest girl I've ever met. I wish you and daddy could see her."
"I know sweetheart," June soothed, "but I've been watching both of you for years. It made me feel better to watch over her knowing you were so far away. But really teddy the army?"
"I don't know mom," Teddy said , "I was alone and scared and wanted a change. You were gone , daddy was gone and so was Allison."
"You were never alone," June said, "I've always been with you?"
"Then why did you have to go," Teddy asked.
"It was my time Bear," June said , "god needed me home. He had a plan for me. I've been protecting our baby bear."
"Mommy what are you protecting Annie from," asked Teddy.
"She'll tell you when she's ready. She's getting ready to run and will come to you. Her sister has a mean streak, she's put Annie in the emergency room before," June said, "Annie won't talk about it even with the professionals. But your girl is getting all of her ducks in a row to come closer to you. It's a new plan for her but you'll be a big part in keeping Jessica away from her."
"What's happening," Teddy asked.
"Jessica is violent with Annie," June explained, "I've been watching for years. What you don't see is since November since she met you Annie has been getting stronger. She shares her opinions she has a voice she's drawing that strength from you."
"But I don't know how to be her mom," Teddy said, "that's why we made the choice 20 years ago."
"Bear you're not 21 anymore," June admonished , "you're smart and strong and educated. Your heart will tell you what you need to do."
"What if I need help," Teddy asked.
"Then you ask, Evelyn Hunt is my voice in your life. Sweetie I know everything and I know she loves you as her own. Deep down she's waiting for you and Owen to make it work," June explained.
"Owen is my best friend," Teddy retorted.
June laughed, "your father was mine. "
"He's with Christina," Teddy said.
"Then speak up and change something," June said , "you don't need to be alone for the rest of your life. I don't know why you never dated seriously after Annie was born."
"I was scared," Teddy said , "to be abandoned again. To have to go through that alone again."
"Sweetie you were never alone," June said , "you had me, daddy, Anne and Kristen. You even have Annie working with Anne now. "
"Annie loves it," Teddy replied , "Anne is good for her confidence and pushing her out of her shell."
"You had a shell once two," June said, "took you a trip to the desert to leave it behind."
"I know," Teddy said , "I don't want her to end up like me. "
"She won't because she has you to guide her," June reassured.
"What if I mess up and disappoint her," Teddy asked.
"You won't. Just listen and protect her. You've always fought for the people you care about," June said.
"Mom I'm sorry I let you down," Teddy apologized.
"Bear you make me and your dad so proud every day. I am impressed by the strong brilliant compassionate woman you've become. I only have one thing to ask, call my cousin Cindy once in a while she worries about you and is your only living relative," June said.
"I will. I miss you everyday mom," Teddy said.
"I miss you and love you Teddy Bear," June said , "so does daddy. But I have to go it's almost time for you to wake up."
"I love you mommy, give daddy a kiss for me," Teddy called after the retreating figure.
The alarm rang and Teddy woke up. It took her a moment to remember where she was and she held onto the precious messages from her mom in her dream. Her mom was proud of her and loved her.