Last week of summer

Summer was winding down and Annie had to return to school that weekend. Teddy was dreading having Annie go back to school, she knew that Annie had to finish her year so she could go to medical school but Teddy also knew this would be the last time Annie would be only a three hour drive away. No matter where Annie chooses to go next year she would have to fly to see her. Teddy smiled thinking about the bonds that had formed not only between her and Annie this summer but between Annie and the other members of her Seattle Family. Annie still refused to talk to Teddy about Jessica or the details of what had happened that night, but she was doing well with the counselor after intensive sessions twice a week. Annie was almost back to herself, but she was still getting tired by the end of the day. Teddy was pleased her daughter got along with Henry, because Teddy would never admit it but she was starting to fall for him.

Annie was going to miss home, the little cottage felt more like home in 6 weeks then her parents house had for years. She liked the business of observing and learning at the hospital and the quiet nights they spent on the patio with tea. Annie was also looking forward to seeing her friends and getting back to work. This summer had put her behind in many ways. She had fallen behind in her work with Dr. Milner because the most she could do was read and summarize articles and proofread the writing sent to her by Dr. Milner and her residents. Annie typically saved these tasks for when Teddy was meeting patients in her office or having private discussions with families. She had found mentors in some of the residents and had become close to April, who acted like a big sister sometimes. Jackson and Lexie also enjoyed spending time with Annie, and Annie liked to raid their candy stash for the peanut butter cups. April and Christina were Annie's favourite residents, she knew how opposite the two women were and appreciated the differences between them and what they were teaching her.

"Mama I don't know if I want to go back to school," Annie said over breakfast.

"Why not," Teddy asked.

"Too close to Jessica," Annie said, "she knows where my dorm is."

Teddy sighed this would be a long one, "she doesn't know your class schedule and your building is only accessible by fob. She doesn't have a fob."

Annie countered, "i'm happier here. It's calm and quiet. I can think here."

"You can come home whenever you want," Teddy said, "I'm always happy to have you home. Your room will always be ready. I know you feel safest here. School is safe, you have your friends."

"But you're not there," Annie said.

"You did two years there without me," Teddy said, "you can do this year."

"Will you come up and see me when you have time off," Annie asked.

"When my schedule works I will," Teddy promised, "If you need me I can be there in 3 hours. Or you can be home in three hours. What are you really afraid of?"

"Do I have to tell my friends what happened," Annie asked.

Teddy replied, "you only have to tell them what you want to."

Annie asked, "what did you tell them?"

"That you had emergency surgery and needed a few weeks to recover and had wanted to stay with me," Teddy replied.

"Do they know why," asked Annie.

"Not unless you told them," replied Teddy, "they only know what you told them. I treated it like I would with friends of patients at work. I only tell what I have permission to share and I didn't have your permission to share anything."

"But you didn't ask me before sharing with my parents," Annie pointed out.

"They're your parents," Teddy said, "I couldn't not tell them."

"Do I have to see them when I go back to school," Annie asked.

"It's always your choice," Teddy said, "but I think you should give them a call."

"I can't if Jessica is home," Annie said, "and I need some stuff out of my room."

"Do you want me to call them and set it up," Teddy asked.

"Could you," Annie asked.

"I'll email your mom, what do you need from your room," Teddy replied.

"Fall clothes, my map tube for GIS, rain coat, gum boots," Annie listed.

"I'll let your mom know you want your fall stuff," Teddy said, "why don't we stop there on Saturday on the way to UBC?"

"Could we," Annie asked, "but It feels silly to take 2 cars there."

"You need your car at school and I have to get home," Teddy said, "but we can finish this conversation in the car we're going to be late for rounds if we don't go now."

"I didn't think about that," Annie said, "I'm ready to go if you are."

"You're with Owen today and I think you're up to scrubbing in," Teddy said, " I told Owen it's his call."

"I'm more than ready to scrub in," Annie replied.

They drove to the hospital and Teddy pulled in beside Owen's truck.

"Mama, do you think Uncle Owen could come with us to get my stuff from my parents," Annie asked.

"We can ask him," Teddy replied, "but I don't know his call schedule and it's a long weekend which usually means lots of traumas."

"Dad listens to him," Annie said, "dad doesn't listen to anyone."

It was another offhand remark but Teddy was starting to piece together where the power and control was in the house Dan and Jessica. Annie was being encouraged daily to use her voice and stand up for herself. Teddy was hoping that being with Owen today and back in the OR would help rebuild some of Annie's confidence before she went back to school. Annie claimed she missed her friends but fear and embarrassment were keeping her in Seattle, going home would mean facing what happened and seeing her sister.

Annie walked with Teddy to the surgical floor then turned to the residents locker room. She knew the routine now, go put her stuff in her locker, get scrubs from the shelf, run to the shower stall to change and come put her street clothes back in her bag.

"Annie there's only women here why are you running away to change," asked Christina.

"Because my scar from the incident is hideous and embarrassing," Annie said.

"Mer donated part of her liver to our dad a few years ago. She has a scar from it," Lexie said. Christina had told them the medical side of what had happened to Annie.

"It will fade Annie," Meredith said, "after about a year mine was a line that wasn't red any more."

"I still don't like it," Annie said.

"It's a new scar," Meredith said.

Lexie asked, "did Altman ask Salone to look at it and make sure it wouldn't be a bad scar?"

"Mama was more concerned about the ones on my face," Annie said, "he looked at those and said they did a good job but it could take a while before you don't see them."

Alex walked in ,"so little Altman is ready to scrub in again."

"She says I'm ready," Annie said.

April asked, "whose service are you on today?"

"I'm with Uncle Owen in the pit," Annie replied.

"You're with me and Jackson," April said, "walk down with me?"

Annie followed April to the pit.

"Good to have you back Miss Annie," Owen said.

"It's good to be back Uncle Owen," Annie agreed.

Some one called , "Dr. Hunt blunt force trauma to the abdomen 10 minutes out, potential head injury."

"Let's go," Owen called, "Annie your observing."

Teddy had been called down for a cardio consult and watched as Annie ran after Owen and April. She checked on the patient and sent the patient for an echo. She rushed towards the ambulance bay and grabbed a yellow gown on her way. She ran outside and stood by Annie.

"What do we have," asked Teddy.

Annie answered, "blunt force trauma to the abdomen potential head injury."

"Someone sounds like a resident," Teddy said smiling at Annie.

"I'm just watching. Like a silent useless intern," Annie said.

Owen laughed at Annie's comment, "sense of humor has returned."

April added, "you'll be a great intern when you're ready. You've seen so much already."

"This time next year I'll be starting medical school," Annie said.

"That makes me feel old," Teddy laughed.

"You're not old mama," Annie replied.

"Do you have all of your references," asked Owen.

"Dr. Milner, my pastor, Mrs. Laura, then I need to find two doctors here," Annie said.

"I'll do one of them," Owen said, "you've spent the most time with me."

"I thought we could ask Arizona or Richard," Teddy said.

Owen suggested, "ask both. It can only help."

"I will, before I go back to school," Annie said.

Teddy looked at her sternly, "that means today. Do you have the papers?"

"I need to print them," Annie admitted, "we don't have a printer at home."

"After you see this trauma go to my office and do it," Teddy said.

The ambulance arrived and began unloading the patient as soon as Teddy heard the patient was a 19 year old female and the type of injuries she sent Annie to her office, " Annie go to my office and work on your applications. Get the key out of my lab coat pocket."

Annie walked inside, and grabbed Teddy's lab coat from the hook inside the door. She threw it over her arm as she went through the pit and up to the surgical floor. She stopped in the residents locker room for her backpack and made her way to the cardiac wing and Teddy's office. Annie pulled the keys out of the pocket and let herself into Teddy's office closing the door behind her. Annie placed her laptop on the desk and began working on her Harvard application.

Owen sent the patient for a CT, and turned to Teddy, "I did not think about the age of the patient or the type of injury when I told Annie to run with me."

Teddy put her hand on his arm, "Hunt it's fine it's not your job to worry about my daughter. I just didn't want her to panic seeing that. We only had one nightmare this week, she's actually sleeping."

"Would it help her to see it from the gallery," Owen asked, "it should be similar to what she went through."

"I don't think she's ready yet," Teddy said, "I'm not re-traumatizing her. We've fought too hard the last month to go backwards."

Owen asked, "the nightmares still happen?"

"Less often but she's still having them," Teddy said.

"Do you know what triggers them," Owen asked, "it could be something totally simple like a ceiling fan."

"She doesn't have a ceiling fan," Teddy teased, "but I think you could be on to a simple trigger."

"What did you do the day she had the nightmare," Owen asked.

Teddy thought for a moment, " We went for a walk at the beach, grocery shopping, got school supplies, made cookies, met Henry for a round of mini golf then pizza, when we got home she skyped with Leslie and Dan."

"How was she after the call with her parents," Owen asked.

"She was quiet," Teddy said, "she had a bubble bath then went to bed with her book. Typical Annie when we get a quiet night at home."

"Did you talk to her after," Owen asked.

"She said she was fine," Teddy said, "but I heard parts of the conversation and they're still not ready to stand up for her."

Owen thought, "thats probably the trigger. Is she okay to go back to school then?"

"She's excited to be back with her friends and on campus," Teddy said, "she's worried that it's easy for Jessica to find her. She's already made arrangements to see a counselor on campus starting Tuesday."

"Thats good," Owen said, "how are you dealing with her nightmares?"

"Same way I did in the hospital," Teddy admitted, "sitting with her and holding her works. She eventually curls up with that stuffed otter and I stroke her hair until she's asleep."

"You're a good mom Teddy," Owen said, "you've gotten to know her well. I can see how much she trusts you. You were her first call after the incident she looks to you for guidance. You do what my mom used to do with Meg a single look or a nod and she knew what mom wanted her to do. I saw it today when she went to get ready with the residents and again when you sent her to your office."

"I love her Owen," Teddy smiled, "I always have. Seeing her now I wish I had kept her as a baby."

"Then you never would have gone to Iraq," Owen pointed out, " I would never have met you. Never found my person. Still be stuck with Beth."

"I don't know what I would do without you either," Teddy admitted.

"I'm glad she was brave enough to find you and both of you had the courage to let the other in," Owen said.

Teddy gave him a quick hug as they walked past the entrance to the cardio wing, "I should go see how my daughter's doing. I know she saw the patient."

"Go be a mom Altman," Owen said, returning the hug, "bring her to the gallery if you both want to it could be helpful."

"I'll ask her," Teddy said, "now stop being Uncle Owen and go be a surgeon."

Teddy walked to her office and saw that the door was closed but she could hear Taylor Swift playing softly. She smiled, it sounded like Annie's happy playlist. Teddy knocked on the door, her keys were inside with Annie.

Annie opened the door, "mama they didn't need you?"

"I passed it off to my fellow," Teddy said, "he needs to do a few more pacemakers but doesn't need me for it."

"So what are you doing then," Annie asked.

"I could work on my research or Uncle Owen has a patient your age with similar injuries to yours. He's offered for us to go watch the repair from the gallery," Teddy said.

"Like see what Dr. Smith did in my surgery," Annie asked. She looked skeptical.

"Similar," Teddy said, "we won't know until Owen goes in and looks at it. He'll have a good idea after the CT"

"Can you call him and ask him to let you know what the CT shows," Annie asked.

"It's your choice if we go watch," Teddy said, "but I have reservations. I don't want you to see this and have another nightmare. You've gone 5 nights without one that's the best we've done."

"I want to understand what happened to me," Annie said, "I was so out of it when I got to the hospital that I didn't know what was happening. All I could do was ask for you."

"I know sweetheart," Teddy said, "if you want to watch and see what happened I will sit with you."

Annie hugged her, "thank you mama. Can we go?"

"We will go but if I get paged away or think it's too much for you we leave," Teddy said firmly.

Annie recognized the tone as Teddy's mom voice, "yes mama."

"Get your sweater and return my lab coat," Teddy directed, " I still don't have a good feeling about this."

"I'm not sure if I'll be okay but I want to try," Annie said, "if it's too much can I leave?"

"Of course, you just have to get up and leave quietly," Teddy said, "I'll be right with you."

"Promise you won't leave me," Annie asked.

"I promise," Teddy replied, "lets go."

Teddy stood in the doorway and extended her hand to Annie. Annie took her mama's hand and together they walked to the gallery.

"Annie it's good to have you," Richard said.

"We're not sure if we'll stay for the whole surgery," Teddy said, "Grey, Avery would you mind shifting down so we can sit by the door?"

Lexie and Jackson moved down two seats.

Jackson "how are you doing Annie we haven't seen you much this summer."

"I'm good," Annie replied.

Teddy added, "she's had a different summer."

Lexie said, "your accident was hospital gossip for a while. Altman and Hunt disappear to Canada over night."

Teddy commanded, "Lexie enough. Watching this is enough of a challenge."

Jackson tried to get Annie talking, "heading back to school this weekend Annie?"

"I am," Annie replied, "my last year of undergrad."

"Medical school next," Jackson guessed, "where are you applying?"

"Columbia, Harvard, Stanford, UCLA, University of Texas South Western, and the University of British Columbia," Annie replied.

"Which is your first choice," Jackson asked.

"Harvard," Annie said, "where did you go?"

"Yale," Jackson responded.

Teddy put her hand on Annie's shoulder to get her attention then whispered, "they're getting started. Uncle Owen texted me it's the exact same injuries you had, are you sure you want to watch."

Annie looked at Teddy and nodded, "I want to try."

"Then we'll try," Teddy replied.

Annie looked out the gallery window into the OR below she saw where Owen was making the cut into the other girl's abdomen and traced the scar on her own stomach.

"You okay sweetheart," Teddy whispered. She grabbed Annie's hand to stop her from tracing her scar again.

Annie nodded.

Owen continued the surgery and began to search for bleeders and repair damaged organs. Teddy saw what would come next just watching what Owen was doing , "Annie we need to step out for the next part."

"I've had enough can we go back to your office," Annie whispered.

"Of course," Teddy replied she stood and took her lab coat and Annie's sweater from the back of their chairs. With her arm around Annie's shoulder she guided her daughter out of the gallery.

In the quiet hallway Annie wiped the tears from her eyes, "I wasn't ready for that. "

"I know sweetie," Teddy said pulling her in for a tight hug, "do you want a walk outside or to go to my office."

"Office please," Annie said.

Teddy could tell Annie was about to cry, "hey no tears. You're alright, you're safe, I'm right here. I've got you."

Annie nodded into Teddy's shoulder.

Richard came into the hallway and asked , "Annie Teddy are you two okay?"

Teddy kept holding Annie and replied , "a little too much too soon."

"If you two thing your up to scrubbing in we could turn this day around and you can join me for a gallbladder removal," Richard offered.

"When is that," asked Teddy.

"90 minutes in OR 4," Richard said , "there's no gallery, it will just be the three of us and Avery."

"I like Jackson," Annie said, "he treats me like a person and not a little kid."

"I think that would be a good procedure for us to start with," Teddy agreed, "routine, low risk, laparoscopic?"

"Hopefully laparoscopic," Richard said, "3 or 4 tiny incisions little recovery time and almost no scarring."

"Someone needs to figure out how to do trauma and open heart procedures with little scarring," Annie said.

"There's your research one day, miss Annie," Richard said.

"Medical school admissions first," Teddy said.

"Dr Webber," Annie began.

"Yes Annie," Richard responded.

"I know I haven't spent a lot of time in your OR but I have done a few skills labs with you. Would you mind being one of my references for my medical school applications," Annie asked.

"I would be happy to," Richard said with a smile, "after you join us today I'll know even more about what you can do. You show promise when you visit."

"Thank you sir," Annie replied.

"Annie why don't you go to your locker room splash some water on your face and come meet me back at the nurses station," Teddy directed.

Annie nodded and followed the direction with out a word.

"You're a good mom Dr Altman," Richard said, "I see a lot of you in her."

"She's a great kid," Teddy agreed , "my job is to bring out the best in her."

"You will," Richard said, "she looks happy with you. I never saw that bond between Ellis and Meredith Grey. Annie is more comfortable with you in a few months then Meredith was with her mom in 29 years. That's all on you. You've made the effort to get to know her and earn her trust. I heard you in the hall when Hunts procedure was too much for Annie. You saw what she needed and got her calm. She fully trusted you."

"I love her," Teddy said , "more than I thought I could love anyone."

Bailey has heard the last part of the conversation, "welcome to motherhood. Your heart is now in someone else's body. And you pray every moment of every day that their safe, healthy and happy. And when they need trauma surgery you can't breath."

Teddy nodded , "I know the feeling. Annie is the most important person in my world. My favorite person on the planet."

Bailey agreed, "kids have a way of doing that. Even if mine is 4 and yours is 19."

"We have very different issues to deal with," Teddy agreed, "boys, dating and possible sleepovers with a boyfriend."

"Picking your nose, not napping at daycare and hitting other children," Bailey countered , "yours holds a conversation and can be reasoned with."

"Annie is very reasonable unless it's related to the incident," Teddy said, "or getting a haircut."

"She has a lot of hair," Bailey agreed.

Teddy laughed , "try brushing it for her. I did it everyday for two weeks. It's down to her but when it's loose."

"She'll cut it when she sees reason to," Bailey replied.

They had reached the nurses station Annie had the lunch she had packed, "can we eat outside when you grab your lunch?"

"Sure," Teddy smiled , "I'll be back in two minutes."

"Your mama told me about what happened when you were in the hospital," Bailey said , "that was brave watching that surgery Annie."

"Thanks Dr Bailey," Annie replied.

Teddy returned with her lunch and they headed downstairs and out to the benches.

"Sorry I wasn't ready for that mama," Annie said.

Teddy replied, "it's okay you wanted to try. That's why we left when we did. You did better then I thought."

"In July I would have been able to see the whole thing and be fascinated," Annie said , "today all I saw was that girls pain."

Teddy squeezed her hand, "I know and seeing the feelings of the patient and empathizing with how there feeling is something that will make you an amazing surgeon. I can teach you the skills and what to do when but I can't teach you to care for your patient as a human. What you went through this summer you'll carry that for the rest of your life. It'll make you stronger."

"If it makes me stronger why am I still having nightmares," Annie asked.

Teddy explained, "that is your brain trying to figure out what happened and make sense of it. Sometimes when traumatic things happen your brain gets stuck on it. That's what gets called PTSD. I've dealt with it after 9/11 and Iraq so has Uncle Owen. I've never had nightmares the same way you do. But I know uncle Owen is the nightmare expert if you wanted to talk to him."

"I just want them to stop," Annie said.

"We've only had to deal with one this week," Teddy said.

"One big one ," Annie said , "there's been a couple little ones but I was able to calm down. "

"Why didn't you come get me or call me," asked Teddy.

"I would have if I couldn't calm down on my own. But I used the grounding strategy from Dr Wyatt and calmed down," Annie said, she looked proud of herself.

"I'm glad that works for you," Teddy said, "it's one of my favorites."

Annie checked her watch, "we should go meet Dr Webber."

"Yes we should," Teddy said, "that was brave of you asking for his reference. Well done."

"I was nervous but it was a good time," Annie said , "it was only you and in the the hallway with him."

"That was good timing," Teddy agreed , "but you can't be late for surgery sweetheart. I may have to go if I get paged will you be okay?"

Annie took a deep breath and stood up straighter , "mama I can do this."

They walked back inside and towards the OR to meet Webber.