Starting over was such an interesting notion to Julie. The one 'normal life' concept she had forgotten about during her time in the facility was the idea of happenstance. In the facility everything was pre-planned and she got accustomed to a certain schedule.

In life, things didn't always happen that way and she was remembering that quickly.

A few weeks had passed since she'd first met Jane and the new bond was interesting to her. The kids would swing by the coffee shop once in a while for free drinks – to her boss' dismay. She didn't know if any of the other kids knew about her ability, but they never mentioned anything. Jane would ask for rides over her house sometimes and there were two rare occasions that Jim allowed it and picked her up after his late shifts.

Right when she was getting used to the ordinary days, happenstance showed up on her doorstep.

Well, not her doorstep – more like the doorstep of the coffee shop.

Frankie Lister, a 20-something kid strolled into the shop with his head hung low. She'd asked him what he wanted to order then figured she'd also ask him what was wrong.

The comment opened her up to a fifteen minute conversation about how his dad was the owner of the arcade in town where all the kids liked to play. She knew it well, passed it on her way from work and often heard the kids talking about it – hence why they didn't spend every day after school getting cappuccino – they were out at the arcade.

"I'm supposed to be running it and I'm…not very good with money…I'm gonna make us lose the place," he huffed out before taking a long gulp of coffee.

"Lose the place? But it just opened and the kids love it there! You can't close it."

"Well, we're probably going to have to," he sulked in his chair

Julie pondered for a moment, thinking about the kids. They'd be devastated. It was their escape. She felt like they would be so let down, after everything that happened in this town, and now this. They'd think the place was cursed.

"What if I bought you out?" she spoke quickly.

The young man looked up, eyebrows scrunched together. "You have the money?"

"How much?"

He threw out a number and Julie breathed, thinking of what she had hidden at the house from dad's safe. She could swing it, but it was just about all she had in savings. However, if the place did as well as she knew it did, she wouldn't have to worry about money…

So, on a whim, she decided to do it.

It was a whirlwind after that conversation: she went to the bank on her lunch break, met the kid, signed a bunch of paperwork, and met his parents who thanked her for taking this burden off of his plate. Apparently it was a test in responsibility for the young man and he failed. They offered to be a partner in the arcade so she didn't have to spend as much money down – just buy out their son's half.

Julie agreed to that, thrilled that she wasn't taking as much of a risk as she'd expected.

On her way back to the coffee shop, she realized she'd have to quit. Cindy would be so upset.

"I'm not upset!" her voice boomed when Julie told her the news. "God, whatever gets you ahead, kid! I only wish I'd been on shift when Frankie came in, I'd buy him out in a heartbeat! You're now sitting on a gold mine."

Julie asked Cindy to stop by after work for a drink together and she sheepishly asked for business advice, which Cindy was glad to give.

•••

Days flashed by in a whirl while the Lister family showed her the ropes and expectations as partners in the business. They dished out the responsibilities and gave her time to ask questions. It was surprising how easily things shifted for her and she felt like the pieces were all falling into place finally.

•••

"You own what!?" Dustin was the first one to freak out when he showed up and she was in Palace Arcade uniform. "Does this mean we get free gameplay? Oh my God…oh my God, I'm not breathing! Not breathing!" he gasped, being overdramatic as usual and falling to the cement at her feet.

"Hey, I just saved your little hangout and you're still asking for more?!" she joked.

"They're not gonna believe this. Wait till they see! No freaking way!"

Julie laughed as she watched him run inside.

•••

Julie was wiping down one of the games when the bell greeted a new customer. Jane strolled in, looking determined to find her group that was surrounding Dustin while he played Dragon's Lair.

She hadn't seen Jim in weeks and wondered if he was doing well – asked Jane and everything – and she had given a silent nod. Peeking through the window, she watched as his Blazer sat in the parking lot and he lit up a cigarette before taking off, most likely to work.

She sighed; a tad disappointed that he wasn't coming in. Jane had mentioned that he'd asked where she was since he didn't see her at the coffee shop anymore. If Jane hadn't told him it was only a matter of time before he heard, being Chief and all. If he did have that knowledge he sure didn't go out of his way to come inside…

Which was frustrating to say the least. Jim didn't owe her anything, but she appreciated his visits at the coffee shop – looked forward to them. Now…?

Had she thought about kissing Jim? Yes, and probably all too often. But the moment she'd met Joyce, she backed off. Maybe there wasn't anything going on between them – maybe there was – Julie hadn't wanted to read into it, but there was something there.

Joyce was nice. Unlike any other woman she remembered spending time with; in her experience with these things women were often catty. Granted, her experience was with twenty-something-and-under females, not divorced mothers.

Joyce had helped her with the house, gotten her settled, helped her find a job…she could tell why Jim liked her. She was an incredible woman.

And, yeah, maybe she could simply read them with her power, but it felt unnatural – it felt needy and desperate and she was tired of playing that role.

So, sure, Jim's beard was often distracting and the way he'd smirk with that cigarette dangling from his lips…

But this new group of people were all she had at the moment and she wasn't about to let some sexual fantasies ruin her new life.

What'd happened between the two of them before was merely a desperate attempt at feeling something – finding comfort in an escape from their histories.

Now, what was she running from?

What was he?

So, as per usual, she buried herself so deep into making her house a home, working constantly, and sleeping alone. She had to admit it was lonely.

But she loved her new job. Even before everything happened at that lab, she loved working with kids. The arcade was the hot spot; Jane's group was there every chance they got and she loved that it allowed her to keep an eye on Jane.

•••

This day was always hard on Hopper. He figured Joyce knew. He'd told her the date before, hadn't he? One tipsy night together after they'd gotten Will back the two sat there with a bottle of scotch between them. No wonder she offered to keep Jane for the night after the kids left the arcade. He should have told her no, should have held onto that little girl for dear life instead of letting her sleep over the Byers'. Maybe his mind wouldn't have taken him down a dark road if she were here – if someone were here.

Hopper felt cursed. Felt like a black hole. There were times he contemplated going to church, getting someone to cleanse him but the idea sounded foolish to him. Diane had been the religious one, the one to drag him to church to pray for Sara. But God never came through. God took his little girl and, damn it, maybe it had been a punishment for not believing. For showing up to that church without faith, going through the motions when they all knew that he couldn't wrap his mind around a higher power. If there was one, why would they make caskets that small? It wasn't right. But where did believing get Diane? Comfort? Another child? Maybe...

He needed a drink.

One drink turned to two and two turned to several.

Pretty soon his judgment kicked in and he knew he needed to get back home.

He was a little more buzzed than he should have been getting behind that wheel but he opened the window in hopes the night air would wake him up, sober him up. He took side streets, though who was going to pull him over?

'Wait, isn't this Julie's street?' he thought.

Yeah…

Before he could think better of it, he was parking in her driveway.

Fuck, these front porch steps seemed a lot steeper at the moment. With a huff, he rapped his knuckles on her door. Lights were on. She was still awake. What time was it anyway? It was pitch black outside.

The night seemed to still as he stood there waiting for her. What was he doing?

Leaning his head against the doorframe, he closed his eyes for a second. God, he could sleep right now. He could sleep and never wake up and be sort of okay with that. Things would get taken care of.

Hopper had felt restless since Sara passed – felt like he hadn't had a real night's sleep since then and it all wore on him in this moment standing against the doorframe of a friend's house. What a low, he thought.

When the door opened, Julie looked surprised to see him and he just sent her a sad smirk, eyes closing once again.

"Gotta minute?" he groaned, opening his eyes then standing at full height.

Hopper stumbled on his way through the threshold and he felt Julie's hands on him, holding him up.

Julie had been looking at stats for the arcade when she'd heard a car door. She sensed it was Jim in distress before he knocked. So much sorrow was radiating from him in that moment.

"Jim, are you okay?" she asked as she helped him to the couch.

"No," he answered honestly, a slight laugh evident. "When am I ever?"

He flopped down on the couch with a slight hiccup. "Let me get you some water," she said.

Even drunk, Jim knew better than to argue. Instead he let his head rest against the back of the couch, legs stretched out in front of him, blurry vision staring at the ceiling.

When the water was placed in his hand, Hopper laughed. "Well isn't this familiar?"

Julie smiled softly too despite her concern for Jim. "I'll return the favor. Now drink up."

Hopper downed half of it to her surprise and set the rest down on the end table. Leaning forward he ran his hands down his face and held them there for a second while he breathed. The alcohol didn't help. It hadn't last year or the one before that or…

"Room's spinnin'," he acknowledged.

Julie didn't ask, just let herself in to his mind for a moment and when she saw all of the images of his daughter, she hesitated. The most prominent thought in his mind was the date. The pieces all fell into place then.

She remembered what felt like a lifetime ago when she pressed her hand against his chest and told him how much hurt was coming from him. Things had still been raw then, on any given day, but today especially and she just knew.

Jim sat beside her, hands in his hair, eyes downcast, breathing ragged. Her chest felt hollow and heavy all at the same time. She wished she could take the pain away from him, wished she could bring Sara back.

She didn't know what to say but she started with, "I'm sorry."

The way his eyes scanned her then she felt completely transparent. The look of irritation on his face from her reading him made fear fill her gut. She imagined his rage and she deserved it for prying.

"Me too," he choked out, fingers absentmindedly reaching for Sara's hair tie and coming up empty, tears filling his eyes. "Jules, I just…it…" he spoke shakily, looking away to hide his face.

Pulling her legs up underneath her on the couch she focused her mind to a calming memory but then hesitated when it had to do with family. She wanted to comfort Jim, not push him into a downward spiral.

She started with the woods outside of his cabin, the calm quiet surrounding them. When her fingers fell to his hand, Hopper didn't even have it in him to deflect. His drunken mind took a bit longer to process but he knew what she was doing. And he craved it.

The thought led him through the woods, wandering until they reached a clearing where a small lake existed. The sound of the birds and the feeling of the sun on him were comforting. A hammock was tied off to the left and in his mind Hopper made his way over there. Before he knew it he was laying in it, eyes closing from exhaustion. It felt relieving to sleep in this part of his mind where this memory resided.

And then a branch snapped and Hopper was instantly alert, glancing around as he waited for some sort of explanation.

"Julie?" he called in his mind, in real existence as well.

"It's fine, Jim, just…"

But the feeling wouldn't leave. Someone had taken her. Sara. El. They were gone. He felt it in his mind and it dizzied him.

"Sara? El?!" his voice boomed through the woods, that desperation showing its ugly head once again.

He pulled away from her hand, tears filling up in his eyes.

Julie grabbed a tissue, wiped the blood from under her nose, stared at Jim as he hyperventilated.

"I'm sorry if that didn't…" she started.

"-It's fine. You…" he huffed out in a shaky voice. "Damn it…"

Julie took the time to sit with him in silence, let him process through whatever he had to. She would periodically hand him more of the water to drink and he'd silently take it then hand it back. She felt like she was urging a stray cat to trust her.

She turned on the TV, tried to distract him in this way. It sort of worked – he was staring at the screen – but she could tell he was in his head. Soon, though, his eyes started fluttering closed. He'd fall asleep; head would loll forward, and then wake right back up again.

"You can get some rest, Jim," she urged softly.

He shook his head, kept his eyes closed. "Just…stay." Without saying anything more, they settled into another comfortable silence. Julie swore he was sleeping but he said, "Couldn't be alone tonight" and her heart broke.

"I'm glad you found your way here."

A half hour passed and Jim's head was against the back of the couch, his breathing even. Julie glanced at him and couldn't help but stare, admiring the big man who looked so peaceful when he slept. She wanted to touch his face, kiss his forehead, make things better, but she thought better of it.

Jim was still pretty shitfaced even an hour later when he'd woken up, finished more water, and she helped him stumble to the bathroom.

Alone in the bathroom, Hopper splashed cold water on his face to wake him up, sober him, but all he kept thinking about was the sound of the flat line when his little girl was no longer with him.

He vomited then and it made him sicker to know that Julie was the one who got to witness this from him. He should've gone home. Idiot.

"M'fine," he called before she could even ask. God, how much had he had tonight?

The room was still spinning and it made his stomach lurch again. Poor Julie had just been trying to comfort him with that vision thing, but his mind brought about a sound – a single sound – a female scream – and he spiraled.

God, what was wrong with him?

The door opened behind him which made this whole thing even worse. He couldn't stop his stomach from convulsing as he dry heaved over the toilet. Julie pressed her hand to his back, grabbing him a washcloth and wetting it while rubbing her empty hand along the length of his back to comfort him.

What a fucking embarrassment he was, he thought.

•••

Julie managed to get him into bed after forcing him to take off his shirt so she could wash the vomit off of it.

He stayed in the guest room he'd been in last time he stayed at the house. She'd seen Joyce pick up Jane tonight from the arcade so she assumed she was taken care of.

After throwing his shirt in the laundry, she came back up to check on him. Quietly peeking in the room, she saw his back turned to the door, saw the shake of his shoulders, the quick gasps leaving his lungs, and recognized the sorrow Jim was feeling. Not wanting to watch the man break down, she turned and went back to her room to give him some privacy.

She didn't sleep well that night, worried that he would vomit and choke on it. Multiple times she went to check on him with fear bubbling inside of her. Each time he was alright – either sleeping or crying quietly and it broke her to see. There was nothing she could do. She knew how private he was and she was grateful that for whatever reason fate brought him to her doorstep tonight. Imagining him alone with the weight of this day was suffocating her.

Closing her eyes, she stood against the door to the guest room and snuck herself into his memories: a little girl hooked up to all kinds of machines, pretty features, bald, her hair tie on his wrist. She saw him reading to her, kissing the top of her head; saw the broken look on his face when that flat line was heard.

Julie stood there covering her mouth, trying not to make a sound to wake him. She got brave, wondering if she could leech the memory from him for the time being, wondering if she could shoulder the burden for a bit in the way that Brenner had taught her. She'd never tried it with something negative, but she wanted him to get some rest.

Taking tentative steps forward, she sat down on the edge of the bed then softly pressed her hand to Jim's arm. He slowly stirred, a groan leaving his mouth when he blinked at her.

"What're you-" he inhaled sharply when he felt a tingling sensation in his fingertips.

Julie inhaled too, holding her breath as she gritted her teeth in hopes to pull the pain from him.

Hopper felt instant ease, his once clouded mind was cleared and he almost felt confused at what had been weighing him down. Julie held back the tears as the memory flooded her mind, feeling what Jim had been carrying with him.

In a last-ditch effort, she tried to shove the calming memory to him – the one from weeks ago – the beach. It was a placeholder. The memory of his daughter wasn't gone from him, but the thought of it currently being in his mind was. Brenner had worked on it with Julie for weeks – his prize manipulation – teaching how to force a distraction on someone. She hated doing it, hated the feeling it left her with for hours, hated manipulating people like that. Sure, her other mind tricks manipulated things and forced them to reveal personal thoughts, but this was different entirely: most people had no clue what she could do so peeking in on their thoughts didn't change their patterns. This, however, altered their thinking completely.

She remembered when she'd leeched a memory from Brenner and put his thoughts on another track – he hadn't forgotten it, just couldn't remember what he'd been thinking about at the time. It was scary to her what she could do and she almost shielded herself away from it. Yet the effects wore off hours later and Brenner remembered their training, assuming it went well since he couldn't remember.

Watching the awful scenes of Sara her nose started bleeding so she backed off, ducked out of the room to wipe her nose and hide her sobs.

There was an ache in her chest for Jim Hopper.

•••

Hopper assumed he knew what happened. After he managed to get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep, he laid there staring at the ceiling and piecing last night together. Instant relief after Julie had woken him up, pushed a half-hearted beach memory into his mind before completely bolting from the room.

She'd leeched it from him. He could remember what happened, but there was a hole – as if he knew what to be mourning, but his mind wouldn't let him cry anymore, couldn't be devastated anymore. He felt like he could put himself back together and handle it another day.

Julie had washed and dried his shirt, folded it and placed it on the nightstand while he slept. He dressed, washed his face, felt the ache in his gut from lack of food, and wandered into the kitchen.

Leaning against the doorway he watched Julie. She sat on the counter beside the stove, poking a spatula aimlessly at the toast while sipping her coffee.

Her eyes were bloodshot, a little swollen as if she'd been crying. He crossed his arms as he made his way over to her. She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes.

"I know what you did last night," he sighed, leaning against the counter opposite her. "You…hid the memory from me…how?"

Turning to the pot, she filled up a coffee mug for Jim then handed it over to him, returning to the French toast moments later.

"Brenner worked on it with me. I don't…" she let out a shaky breath. "I don't like to."

She had tears in her eyes when she looked back at him. It crushed him.

"Then why?" he was about to start yelling but reeled it back in for the sake of his own head.

Julie shook her head. "I couldn't see you like that, Jim. I…you do that every year, from what I've seen in your thoughts and…I'm sorry. It's personal to you and I shouldn't have done that, I get it if you're mad, but I just…" a small sob left her and she slammed down the coffee mug, shifted to slide off the counter.

When she landed inches from Jim, he reached out awkwardly, set his mug down too, and pulled her body into his.

She fought it for a minute but soon broke down in his arms, burying her head in his chest. Hopper pressed his chin to the top of her head, wanted to cry too at the thought of her carrying the weight of the loss of his child – but no tears came.

"How long will you feel like this?" he managed after a few minutes

She shrugged. "It comes and goes."

Jim nodded at that. "You didn't have to -" he sighed, stopping himself from getting angry. "Thank you."

Jim's stomach growled

Julie pulled away, cheeks red from embarrassment of being so close to him in that moment. She focused on the food and plated it for him, handing it over so he could sit down and eat.

She'd made bacon and eggs too and placed the food on the table for him as well.

"You keep cooking like this I'm making this a habit," Jim said, mouth full.

She pushed his shoulder as she passed him.

"You bastard."