DISCLAIMER: ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE.
The rating of this story has CHANGED from T to M now, due to sexual content. Please bare this warning in mind if you decide to continue reading.
~0~0~0~0~0~
"Auntie Nat!" Lila was racing down the porch steps and across the grass as soon as those wide eyes of hers landed on the two people approaching the farmhouse. Snow scattered in every direction as the little girl raced as if being chased by beasts, her arms extended in front of her.
Instantly, Natasha dropped to her knees and embraced her tightly, picking her up and spinning her round in a circle. "Oh, I've missed you." She breathed out. It had only been a couple of months since Natasha and Steve had left the farmhouse to get married in Wakanda, and although Natasha had once spent years between visits to the farmhouse, she really had missed the Bartons. They were her family, and it felt good to be back here for Christmas.
Lila kissed her cheek before turning those wide, bright eyes onto her aunt's companion. "Uncle Steve!" She cried out in delight.
Chuckling, Steve happily took Lila from Natasha's arms, giving her a gentle hug. She looked so tiny in his muscular arms, but Natasha beamed at the sight of the two of them together. "Hello, princess." Steve greeted her, and Lila looked ready to burst with happiness at the nickname.
"Lila, stop hogging them." Clint's voice sounded from the doorway, and Natasha rolled her eyes as her best friend crossed the porch to stand in front of them, holding his arms out expectantly. "Well, don't I get a hug too?"
Laughing, Natasha stepped into his embrace. "And here I was hoping that you would have grown up since I last saw you." She teased. When she stepped away from him, Clint shook hands with Steve, who still had a giggling Lila in his arms. The little girl showed no interest in getting down any time soon, but Steve didn't seem inclined to put her on her feet either. Again, Natasha's heart fluttered in her chest.
"Over all these years, you really should stop expecting that from me." Clint told her, turning to say to Steve, "Blink twice if she's driven you crazy yet, and I'll help you escape." He stepped to the side just in time to avoid Natasha's playful, yet still quite powerful, punch to the arm. "I'm joking. Honestly."
Steve's arm wrapped around her waist as he replied, "She's always driven me crazy." His kiss on her cheek was probably intended to soften his remark, but Natasha didn't bristle or elbow him for it, instead her legs felt weak. God, would she ever stop swooning for this man?
Clint grinned at their interaction, pushing the door open with one hand. "Alright, I promised I'd get you inside quickly, before Laura bursts from excitement. She has a lot of questions about a certain wedding."
A still-giggling Lila was placed gently on the ground so Steve could grab their bags. Natasha knew better than to offer her help, and she stuck her tongue at her husband for his gentlemanly ways, to which he replied with a wink. They followed Clint and his daughter inside the house, which was wonderfully warm compared to the snowy world outside.
Laura was waiting for them in the kitchen, placing Baby Nathaniel down onto a highchair. She hugged both Steve and Natasha tightly, before stealing Natasha towards the kitchen. Steve, saved from wedding questions for the meantime, headed over to where Cooper was waving, next to a pretty impressive toy-building. Lila, who had no interest in such games, followed anyway, as she clearly didn't want to leave Steve behind. Clint joined them, saving himself from wedding talk.
"So," Laura's eyes gleamed as she turned to Natasha. Perhaps, Clint hadn't been joking when he warned that his wife was near bursting point. "Tell me everything."
Whilst she helped Laura finish up the final bits for lunch, Natasha was more than willing to tell her friend every last detail about Wakanda and the wedding; from the rhino rides, to the city, to the dancing and their little apartment, to the ceremony itself and the white roses. As she listened, Laura often put in a few 'aws' and 'wows' and a couple of 'oh, how beautiful!', and she drank in every single word, every scrap of detail that Natasha gave her. Reliving those memories herself, Natasha felt warm all over.
By the time Natasha was finished, she felt slightly flushed, as she couldn't quite believe the story she had just told had been her own. If someone had asked her five years ago if she would ever consider herself being someones wife in the future, she would have laughed in their faces. But, being with Steve felt so right to her, as if she had been destined to have him in her life like this, and being his wife was just incredible.
Unable to help herself, she glanced across the room to where Steve was now lying across the floor, playing with toy cars with Cooper while Lila drew at his feet. Seeing how good he was with them made Natasha feel that familiar bang of sadness as she remembered that she would never be able to give him that; his own biological children. Instantly, she pushed it away, swallowing it down and down until she was able to watch them and smile fondly at the sight of her favourite people being together so comfortably, without that bitter feeling of guilt and regret.
Laura followed her gaze, knowing instantly where Natasha's mind would lead her. Gently, she covered Natasha's hand with hers, resting them both on top of the counter. "There are ways, Natasha."
Adoption. Natasha swallowed. Although she and Steve hadn't really brought up children over the years, she knew it was because of her sterilisation that Steve didn't broach the subject. It wasn't because he blamed her, but because it saddened him that the Red Room had done that to her, and he didn't want to bring up those memories for her, to reopen that pain like a wound that had never quite healed over.
Did he want children? Steve was a natural with them, there was no way to deny it. Cooper and Lila adored him, and not just because he was Captain America, but because he was kind and funny and gentle, he didn't care about making a fool of himself as long as it made them laugh. An image of a little boy with Steve's dimples, or a little girl with his pretty blue eyes popped into Natasha's mind before she could prevent it.
"We're on the run, Laura." She said, swallowing. That picture of a child that could never exist was far too painful for her, so she just prayed the thought never entered her mind again. She couldn't let it. It hurt too much to live in a world of 'what-ifs' and impossible endings. "Who knows how long it will be until the government stop chasing us down?"
Sensing that Natasha no longer wanted to continue this subject, Laura gave her hand another squeeze and said, "One day, when you and Steve save the world, they'll realise how idiotic they are." She assured her. "I have no doubt that my husband will somehow find a way to be there for that too. He just can't stay out of trouble."
Natasha's laugh was genuine, lifting the weight in her heart. "I told you that when we first met, but you didn't listen."
Laura smiled, glancing over to where Clint was sitting at the table, looking at a picture that Lila had just drawn and giving her a compliment that made her smile almost as wide as her entire face. "What can I say? I have a thing for superheros."
Natasha's eyes found Steve once again, and he caught her gaze and smiled. That weight in her heart disappeared completely at the warmth in his eyes and that little dimple that she adored. "So do I."
Baby Nathaniel clapped with delight as they all joined him at the table for lunch, and his chubby cheeks were certainly adorable. He proved entertainment by knocking his little bowl all over the small table attached to his high chair, and spreading the food everywhere with his tiny, fat baby hands.
After lunch, Natasha and Steve cleared up while Laura went to put the baby down for his post-food nap. Lila and Cooper went out to play with their father in the back yard, working on their archery skills. Surprisingly, it was Lila who seemed the most eager to learn her dad's famous talent, boasting to her brother that she'd win as they dressed in thick coats, hats and scarves.
Unable to resist, Steve braced his arms on the counter, trapping Natasha between the sink and his body. She made no protest whatsoever, as she blinked up at him expectantly.
"Can I help you?" She asked sweetly, battering those long eyelashes of hers.
He hummed thoughtfully. "I believe so." He kissed her gently, remembering that there was a high risk of a small human walking in on them at any time. Satisfied enough for now, he leaned back and asked, "Fancy a little competition?" He tilted his head to the back door, where Clint was instructing the kids.
"You really want to lose with such an audience?" Natasha asked innocently.
Chuckling, he kissed her one more time. "I'd watch that confidence of yours, missy, it might well get you in trouble."
"Missy?" She repeated, her grin widening. She liked missy. Also, competitive-Steve was always a turn on for her. "Alright, Rogers, let's see what you've got." Taking his hand, she dragged him out to the backyard.
Steve, as it turned out, found the bow and arrow quite hard to get his head around, however he took on Lila's helpful tuition with a warm smile as the little girl took her job as teacher very importantly. It came as little surprise to Natasha that Steve was naturally quite good at it, once he understood what to do. Captain America seemed to be perfect in every way, so Natasha couldn't help herself when she reached up and blew against his ear, tickling his neck, and causing him to miss the target completely, preventing him from a triple bullseye.
Lila giggled with joy as Steve chased Natasha around the tree, catching her finally and wrapping his arms around her from behind. Natasha laughed wildly as her husband picked her up and spun them both around, making the world a blur of white. When finally he placed her on the ground, his hands crept under her stomach and tickled the bare skin of her stomach. Natasha had laughed widely and writhed under his touch.
"Alright, love-birds," Clint tapped his bow against the tree. "Either continue the game, or find somewhere else to be sickly in love. My eyes are burning."
Not moving an inch away from her husband's arms, Natasha stuck her tongue out at her friend. Steve kissed her temple before releasing her, somewhat reluctantly. "Don't sulk when you lose, Barton." He shot back good-naturedly, pulling his arrow from the centre of the target.
Clint chuckled. "Oh, I wouldn't talk too soon there, Cap. The next round is blind-folded."
~0~0~0~0~0~
That night, Clint made a bonfire out of the spare logs, and they all settled around it as the star-filled sky stretched above them. Even though she was bundled up in a thick coat of Laura's, Natasha had still made a comment to Steve about how much she hated winter. Chuckling, Steve had pulled her closer to his body, saying that he was more than happy to keep her warm for the entire night. Nestled beside her husband and hearing his laughter in her ear, Natasha had forgotten all about her dislike for the cold.
As the flames warmed her face, Natasha leaned into Steve, tightening her arm around his waist so he knew just how much she appreciated him, and not just as her personal water bottle. Just in general. In every possible way. At Natasha's side, Lila was sat, excitedly demonstrating the art of making a s'more. Steve, who had never done this before, watched intently, and Natasha reached up to kiss his jawline. He was far too adorable when he concentrated that hard.
Cooper, who had developed quite the talent when it came to a guitar, played a couple of songs for them. He made a few little mistakes, but his grin when he finished showed just how much he enjoyed his newest skill. They had all clapped for him, encouraging him to play a different song until he ran out. Clint had ruffled his hair affectionately, and Laura had kissed her son's cheek with pride, even though Cooper had tried to duck away from both actions. Natasha promised him that he would be able to charm lots of girls with that talent of his, and Cooper had blushed so furiously that he almost matched the fire in front of them.
"Do you wish I could play the guitar?" Steve asked quietly into her ear, his voice low enough that only she could hear. The others were too busy stuffing their faces with biscuits and chocolate to notice much more.
She grinned. "I much prefer an artist." She leaned up to whisper, "You're just so good with your hands."
The comment earned her another dimpled smile and a kiss on the corner of her mouth.
Then, Clint took his fatherly role very seriously when he told them all a few bedtime stories. Soon enough, Lila was yawning widenly and her head rested on Natasha's knee, while Cooper was struggling to keep his eyes open.
As Laura and Clint carried their exhausted children back to the house, Natasha snuggled further into Steve's warmth. Even compared to a roaring fire, nothing was quite like the feeling of being in her husband's arms.
"Penny for your thoughts?" Steve asked softly, as he caught her staring into the flames that flickered in front of them. Thinking to himself just how beautiful his wife was, he was captured by the sight beside him. He hadn't missed the look of sadness which he had seen crossed over her face in the kitchen earlier, but if Natasha didn't want to bring it up, he wasn't about to push her. He had a good idea what had caused it, but bringing it up again would only upset her.
She tilted her head up to meet his gaze. "I'm really, really happy, Steve." She whispered, and it reassured him that whatever she had been thinking about earlier was successfully wiped from her mind. If he saw that look touch her face, as if she had lost herself to a place that made her sad, he'd ask her about it. "I never even thought I could deserve to feel like this."
"You deserve it, and so much more." He told her, his tone serious but loving, as he leaned down to kiss her gently. "I'm going to spend every day proving that to you, Nat."
Not one single part of her doubted his words. She rested her head against his chest, directly over his heart, and sighed with contentment. "I love you."
"I love you too, sweetheart." He murmured into her ear. "Forever,"
~0~0~0~0~0~
Giggling greeted his ears as Steve descended the stairs the next day. He'd spent the morning chopping logs with both Clint and Cooper, and had jumped in the shower to freshen himself up before lunch. Once he'd changed and dried his hair, he had been hoping to find Natasha in their room. He hadn't seen her all morning, and although a couple of hours were not a long stretch of time by any imagination, he always liked to make sure he got to kiss her senseless at least five times a day.
But, as the sound of her carefree laughter touched his ears, he smiled.
As he rounded the corner into the kitchen, he was greeted instantly with a cloud of white powder. Blinking, his eyes picked up the packets of flour that dotted around the kitchen counter, and two sheepish grins.
"What exactly has gone on in here?" He asked, trying not to laugh. One of them, out of him and Natasha, had to be the adult in the situation, and it clearly wasn't going to be in.
Natasha, whose bright hair was covered in a layer of powder, rolled her eyes at him. "Well, what does it look like?" She winked, and he couldn't help but notice just how adorable she looked right now, her hands on her hips while her skin was pale with flour.
"We're baking cookies, Uncle Steve!" Lila told him estactically, rushing across the room and grabbing his hand. He let her drag him over to the counter, where through the mess of spoons and rolling pins, there were unbaked cookies lining a baking tray, ready to go in the oven. They were decorated with all sorts of sprinkles of several colours, and it was clear which of them had been Lila's creations; those ones looked as if a bomb of sprinkles had hit them.
"Well, you could have fooled me." He said, taking in the flour on Lila's rosy cheeks.
Natasha jabbed him in the side affectionately before wrapping her arm around his waist, stepping closer to him. "It's called having creative fun, Steve." She told him firmly, patting his chest. "You know what that is, don't you?"
He looked down at her, conveying the message he couldn't say in front of the little girl stood with them, Minx. Understanding exactly what his look meant, Natasha grinned that devilish grin of hers that always did funny things to his balance.
"Here, lick the spoon!" Lila shoved a wooden spoon towards him, snapping his attention away from his flirt of a wife. "It's fun!"
With a chuckle, Steve took a lick of the cookie dough. "Delicious," He said, and Lila beamed at the compliment to her baking.
"Please can you put them in the oven for us?" Lila asked him.
More than happy to help, Steve placed the tray inside the warming oven just as Lila rushed off to wash the flour off her face. She probably wouldn't come back down until the cookies were done; Lila was an awful lot like her father, and lacked patience for this sort of thing. Taking advantage of the chance of privacy, Steve turned and caught Natasha off guard, pinning her against the counter.
"And what is it exactly you want?" Natasha raised an expectant eyebrow.
He hummed thoughtfully. "Creative fun," He decided, as his mouth lowered to her neck and his tongue licked the flour off her skin in one slow, long line. The action had its desired effect, as Natasha's breath caught and he felt her body tremble slightly underneath his.
"Steve, Lila-"
"Is going to be a couple of minutes," He reminded her, and she knew he would never start something that couldn't be finished, especially with the high risk of a little girl getting scarred for life. But, he continued to cover her neck in slow, sucking kisses, cleaning the flour away from her soft skin. His lips moved over her jaw, his nose brushing against her cheekbone before he finally found her lips. At least he would succeed in kissing her senseless once this morning, and he very much looked forward to the other opportunities that the day would bring.
Natasha returned the kiss with equal fervour, her hands knotting into his hair as she pulled him even closer. His hair had gotten considerably long recently, and she enjoyed how easily her fingers could grip into it. Steve hadn't mentioned cutting it, and she certainly wasn't going to bring it up, just like she hadn't mentioned how he hadn't shaved recently. That stubble really was incredible when it brushed against her skin, especially against her inner thighs. Tongues battled for dominance, and Steve's hands lifted her shirt out of the way to graze over her stomach, settling on her hips.
"Steve?" She asked against his mouth.
He paused, pulling back to scan her face. "What is it?"
She gave him a slightly nervous smile. "What would you say if I told you I've decided to dye my hair?"
For a moment, he just stared at her in confusion, and then his eyes seemed to rack over her hair, taking in the colour of it. He loved her hair, how it was the perfect reflection of her personality; strong, fierce, fiery. But, then he saw just how much she was waiting on his answer, on his approval, and he softened. "Natasha, I would never care about something like that. If you wish to dye your hair, than go for it. You're so beautiful, no matter what colour you decide to go for."
"Even bright green?" She asked, and the glint in her eyes revealed that she was indeed, joking. She looked ready to bite her lower lip, and her hands were fidgeting slightly in his hair.
Instantly, he leaned down to prevent that habit of hers. "I love you, regardless of how you look. That will never change. Please, if it's something you want to do, don't hold back on my part."
"It's not something I particularly want to do." She told him. "It's just that my hair colour has always been a kind of signature for me, and I know that probably sounds ridiculous but...but, we're going to be on the run, when we leave here. Moving from place to place. Who knows who will see us, and I just can't risk being noticed, because it'll put us in danger. It'll put you in danger."
"Sweetheart," He rested his forehead against hers soothingly. "Whatever you feel you need to do, then do it. It makes me so proud of you, to know that you're willing to do anything to keep us safe. Even if it means you wondering around with bright green hair."
She swatted his chest, but her laugh was the best thing that Steve had ever heard. "Alright, maybe not even I am brave enough to pull off bright green. I was thinking more...blonde?"
"Hmm, we could test out if blondes really do have more fun." Steve said, stroking his chin as he pretended to think it over. Then, he nuzzled his nose against hers. "Whatever you want, Nat."
"It's lot of management, but...I don't know. I'll think about it." She decided, and then stroked his jawline slowly. "Steve, when are you next going to shave?"
Blinking, he tried to hide his surprise at her question. He'd thought she quite liked the fact he hadn't touched a razor for a good few weeks, but perhaps he had gotten the wrong idea. "I can shave tonight, if you want me too?"
For a second, she looked puzzled, and then realised what was happening. "Oh, no! I mean, if you want to. I quite like it, and I really do think you'll pull of the roguish look quite well. Really, really well in fact. But, if you don't actually want to keep it, then by all means-"
He chuckled, silencing her babbling with a kiss. "Perhaps, it's time for both of us to try new looks." He decided, and she smiled softly, relaxing into his arms. "You're my favourite person, Natasha."
"Hmm, don't let Lila hear you say that." She warned playfully, but she rose up on her tiptoes to kiss him, mumbling against his lips, "But, you're my favourite person, too. In the whole entire world."
Their next kiss was longer, and fuelled with passion and adoration, so much so that they completely forget that they were stood in the kitchen of the Barton family farmhouse. Steve's hearing would alert them to any approaching child - or, in the case of Clint, man child - but he was slowly losing himself in his wife once again. She had such a power over him, the ability to let him forget his own name, as everything else blurred into unimportance around her, a bright flame that burnt out everything else.
Only when they heard Lila thundering back down the stairs, did Steve step away from her, noticing her slightly swollen lips and flush to her cheeks. With a wink, a promise that he very much intended to resume things with her when they were alone again, he turned and started to clear away their mess.
Once the cookies had finished their time in the oven and had been left on a rack to cool off, Steve took Natasha's hand and led her outside onto the porch. He sat down in one of the comfortable lounge chairs, pulling her into his lap. Without a word of complaint, she settled onto him, resting her head on his shoulder. It had started to snow again, and Steve suddenly had an idea.
"Nat?" He asked, as she seemed to have drifted off in his arms. Her 'hmm?' was enough confirmation of his theory, and he chuckled. "Fancy making snow angels with me?"
When she looked up at him, it wasn't with excitement or joy, but rather amusement and disbelief. "You're a child, Steve Rogers." She accused.
"Perhaps, but it's fun." He said, and when she didn't budge from his lap, he playfully bit her ear, "Come and roll around in the snow with me, Natasha, and tonight, I'll make sure we have a tumble in the sheets."
She groaned. "You should be careful, your dirty talk is starting to go down a very funny route." But, she got off him and held her hand out. "Let's just get this over with. You know I don't like the cold."
As he always did, he found this side of Natasha entertaining, because deep down, he knew she wasn't as agains the idea as she was pretending to be. So, he had no remorse when he picked her up, carried her to a particularly deep patch of snow and threw her into it. She screamed, and glared up at him when she rolled to face him.
"I'm going to kill you, Mr Rogers." She warned, and her tone was dangerous as she got to her feet with the speed of a seasoned spy. Before he could blink, he was tackled to the ground, his wife straddling his waist as she pinned him down.
Unable to resist, he raised an eyebrow at her and commented, "Well, this is certainly a nice turn of events."
Her eyes narrowed as she understood exactly what he was referring to, and Steve had no time to block his face before she launched a handful of snow right into it. Shaking it away from his eyes, he laughed, the sound vibrating through his chest.
Natasha paused, allowing herself to get momentarily distracted by the sight of him underneath her like this, with the snow contrasting against his features and his beautiful eyes glistening like blue stars. She could listen to his laughter for the rest of her life. It filled her with so much happiness, and made her forget every threat that would face them the moment they left this farmhouse.
Sensing that she wasn't paying attention, Steve flipped them over and stood up. He knelt down and picked up a handful of snow, crushing it between his palms to shape it into the perfect ball.
Natasha scrambled to her feet. "Don't you dare-" Her threat only made it half-way before his snowball was launching through the air at her, and she ducked just in time to avoid getting it in her hair. Growling lowly, she scooped her own snow up. "You're so going to regret this."
For a little while longer, they entertained themselves thoroughly by throwing snow and trying to avoid getting absolutely drenched from the other person's attack. Natasha laughed so much that her stomach ached, and so when Steve sat down and grabbed her hand, she was powerless as he pulled her down into the snow. She watched in pure amusement as Steve made his own angel in the whiteness.
Sitting up to admire his work, he looked at her with that beloved smile on his face, the dimple making an appearance. "I think my angels a little lonely, Nat."
She rolled her eyes, but knowing that she could never deny him anything, she set to work on making her own imprint in the ground. Although she felt slightly childish, she giggled when she sat up and looked down at the two angels lying before them; one smaller than the other.
Then, Steve pushed her backwards and covered her body with his, kissing her senseless for the second time that morning. "Shower?" He suggested against her mouth, referring to their now wet clothes and hair.
She smirked. "Shower sounds good to me."
~0~0~0~0~0~
Christmas with the Barton's had been perfect. There was no other way to describe it.
Of course, Steve and Natasha had started the morning in their most favourite of ways, moaning each others names and losing themselves in a sea of passion and bliss. Then, once they had showered and made themselves presentable, they were ready just in time for a very excitable Lila to pound on the door and demand that they come downstairs for presents. Of course, Laura and Clint insisted that everyone had breakfast first, and Natasha had been convinced that the children broke a world record with just how fast they scoffed down their toast. Then presents had been exchanged, and they had all spent the day consuming hot-chocolate and watching movies before a magnificent feast.
When Director Fury walked through the front door of the Barton family home the day after Boxing day, no one masked their shock well. Natasha was pretty certain that Laura's cup hitting the table was a lot harder than the woman intended, and Steve's hand came to rest on his wife's thigh, giving her a reassuring squeeze.
"Sorry for the lack of warning," The SHIELD Director said, in an attempt to lighten the mood once Laura had left with the kids, leaving just Steve, Natasha and Clint at the table. "I would have called, but you two have no means of contact, and Barton's terrible with technology." No one laughed.
"What do you want, Fury?" Natasha demanded, making it perfectly clear that she was not happy to see him. Not in the slightest. Over Christmas, she'd definitely allowed herself to just enough how normal her live seemed. Now, Fury served as a harsh reminder that she and Steve were not free to live their lives how they so desperately wanted to.
"Firstly, I believe congratulations are in order." Fury said, casually gesturing to the rings on Natasha and Steve's hands. Neither of them had taken them off, not whilst they had been at the farmhouse, and not when Fury had first arrived unannounced. "Honestly, I was wondering when you'd finally pop the question, Rogers."
Surprised, Steve raised an eyebrow. "How did you-"
"I didn't." Fury answered with a shrug. "But, I'm the Director, I hear everything. I may have one eye, but I'm not blind to what's going on right in front of me. Ever since the Winter Soldier incident, I've suspected it. Coulson owes me twenty bucks."
Natasha scowlered. Had there been anyone who hadn't betted on the chances of her and Steve being together? Clearly, they hadn't been as secretive as they'd thought...No, right now, she was too busy being annoyed at Fury's abrupt appearance to even care that the Director had suspected them all this time, that they had wasted years hiding their relationship when really, everyone had clearly had an opinion on them.
But, Fury's voice was warm as he continued, "Honestly, I'm happy for you both. In a world that's always appearing so black and white, it's good to have a splash of colour." When he took in Natasha's sharp, annoyed look, he sighed. "Look, you all know I didn't come all this way to pop by and give you my congratulations. Barton, I wish it didn't have to be here. You are not involved in this mission, but finding these two proved harder than I first thought. It made sense to come here."
"Mission?" Steve repeated in confusion, noticing how Natasha's hand tightened around her glass of water. The white of her knuckles stood out against the sun kissed skin from their time in Wakanda, and she would do anything now to go back to those months of uninterrupted bliss with her husband, far from SHIELD and the drama it always brought them.
Fury dipped his head. "Reports have come in, speculation of Chitauri weapons being manufactured in Syria. I came to request that both of you track down the factories and dispose of them. Sam Wilson has already been contacted by Hill, and will join you in the morning, should you agree."
"You're giving us a choice?" Natasha asked, not bothering to hide her disbelief.
"After the Accords, you've both been off the grid, but where you stand with SHIELD is unclear even to me." Fury reminded them. "I understand that you wish to lay low, and I can offer you the best protection for this mission, as well as safe houses to go to after the work is done, along with your usual paychecks. New uniforms and weapons will be at your disposal, for self defence, of course. I just...this is serious, and we need our best, which is you two."
Steve sank back in his chair, processing everything.
With blood-roaring in her ears, Natasha slowly let go of the glass that had been held in her death grip. She looked across to her husband, wondering where his head was with this. "We need to talk about it." There was no request for added time. It was a demand.
Fury nodded. "Of course. I will send Hill in the morning with a jet. If it returns with just her, I'll know your answer, and I promise I won't push you."
Clint rose to his feet to show the Director out of the house, giving Natasha a curt nod of his head before both men disappeared. Even when the front door shut down the corridor, Clint did not return.
But, Natasha didn't want to talk inside the house. This was going to be a long conversation, and possibly a loud one. Laura and the kids were asleep, and the entire family deserved to not be disturbed.
As it turned out, Steve was thinking the exact same thing, as he got up and held his hand out to her. "Fancy a walk?"
Natasha remained quiet as she took his hand and they left the house quietly, shrugging on coats and heading down to the lake across the snowy clearing. The moon reflected in the shimmering water, and hundreds of tiny stars glistened on top of the water. A cold night breeze rustled around them. In the distance, they could see the fading flash of Fury's jet as it disappeared completely into the night sky.
Only when it was gone from sight did Natasha let out the breath she was holding. "Tell me what you are thinking," She whispered.
Steve exhaled slowly, turning to face her. His arms automatically slid around her waist, drawing her gently towards him, and she gladly stepped closer to his body; not only seeking warmth, but comfort that only he could bring her. Gosh, she felt so foolish for letting herself get lost in this perfect world, when in reality, what waited for them outside the farmhouse had always been lurking around the corner. Instead of preparing herself for it, she'd let herself get lost in the cookie baking, the snowball fights, the bonfires and the movie nights.
"I'm thinking," He said softly, turning his face so his eyes could stare out across the water in front of them. Then, he looked back at her, and it was as if he was looking through her, right to her heart and her soul. "That it's not like either of us to turn down a chance to protect people."
She had expected as much, and his answer didn't upset her, or surprise her. They'd both given so much to keep the world safe. The entire reason she had accepted Fury's guidance in the first place was because she had a lot to make up for. Her ledge still had red on it. New York had helped ease some guilt, but after the events of Lagos and Sokavia, it was still tainted with red. Red that wouldn't be washed away by her simply wishing for it, or ignoring it.
"It could be dangerous." She pointed out.
The corner of his mouth twitched. "Since when have you shied away from danger?" When she didn't respond, he looked at her, his eyes understanding, patient, knowing full well that she was still trying to make sense of it all. "Either way, we were going to have to leave them behind, Nat."
Clint and his family had been in the forefront of her mind, since Fury's offer. If they accepted, then she would have to walk away from them, something which always broke her heart. But, at least this time, she would have Steve with her. He would always be beside her, and that reminder gave her much needed strength and courage. Nothing was worth putting the Barton's at risk, and she and Steve were wanted by pretty much every government in the entire world.
"Sam will be waiting." She said, deflecting the reminder of saying goodbye to the Barton's. "We can't let him go alone." Her concern for Sam Wilson was not fake; despite his jokes, she considered Sam to be a friend to both her and Steve.
Steve dipped his at her statement, his hand brushing down her cheek softly. "If we do this, Natasha, we can start over. I told you before that we shouldn't have to feel like guilty criminals on the run. With Fury's help-"
"I do not want Fury's help." She said through gritted teeth. "I wouldn't care if we had to slum it from hotel to hotel for the rest of our lives, Steve, as long as we're together, and the people we love are safe." The Bartons. Bucky. Sam. Yet, the thought of relying on SHIELD again, of following orders and being blinded to what was really happening...her trust in SHIELD, in Fury, would never recover completely. Not after everything that had happened.
"I know." His lips brushed against her temple. "And I understand that accepting Fury's offer won't come without it's own risks. Yes, we'll have to take up new identities, and probably live in very isolated areas. But, it will also mean that we don't have to keep looking over our shoulders every minute of every day."
Leaning into him so her head rested against his chest, so that she could hear his steady heartbeat and allow it to surround her, she said quietly, "I'd protect you, you know."
He chuckled, and this time, it was deep sound with meaning. "Likewise, sweetheart. Always."
As silence fell, Natasha knew that he was letting her decide without his own opinion getting in the way. Steve had never once pressured her, even with the Accords, it had always been her decision to act how she had done. He held her heart, but her mind was hers, and that was one of the reasons why she loved him so much.
She weighed up their options. As much as she hated how Fury had stepped in and ruined their peace, she knew that his offer was one that would only benefit them, in the long run. Their lives could not be spent on edge forever. It would drive them both crazy. She was used to hiding her identity, but it would be new to Steve. Deep down, she knew that her husband also just wanted to give her the best life, not one spent in the shadows.
Looking over her shoulder, she glanced towards the house, where a few lights were still on. Clint was probably getting ready for bed, and would settle into the sheets and hold his wife to him, kissing her forehead. Lila and Cooper would already be sound asleep in their beds, and Baby Nathaniel was probably lost to the world for the night.
A small stab of hope entered her chest that one day, she and Steve could have this; a home of their own, a small slice of peace and safety.
"Looks as if we've got an early flight tomorrow morning," She said, confirming that her decision had been made.
Steve kissed her temple once more, resting his head against hers as he watched the water trickling up the shore towards them, then creeping back into the lake. As she closed her eyes and leaned into Steve's warmth, Natasha jotted this particular moment into her memory; the quiet, the hope.
Hope. Perhaps, it was foolish for her to cling to such a thing, but if she didn't, she feared that she would spiral out of control. Steve brought her hope, gave her a reason to keep fighting, because she wanted so desperately to one day live in a world where they would be free.
To just be Steve and Natasha Rogers.
She'd never wanted anything more in her entire life, and therefore, that flame inside her was relit, burning twice as fiercely as it ever had before.
~0~0~0~0~0~
Okay, so obviously Steve and Natasha spend quite a long time on the run, but I'm going to make the next chapter the start of Infinity War, because I desperately want to start writing about that film and then move onto Endgame. Once I've completed this story, I may make a one-shot of their mission with Sam, but the reason I don't particularly want to do that right now and include it in this story is because it'll take a lot longer to write out, and I really want to get started with Infinity War, and more importantly, Endgame! I hope you guys understand!
- E x