Disclaimer: no legal rights to NCIS, no money being made.
NOT BETA'D, EACH AND EVERY MISTAKE IS MINE, SORRY!
Warnings: same as Chapter One, also not for Ziva fans, nor Tiva fans. Therefore, read at your own risk you have been warned.
DETERMINED TO HOLD
Chapter Eighteen, another heart trip
Sometime later in another place
Tony made it through the sandy terrain and stumbled to a rare rocky spot he thought suitable to hide the small load of evidence he was carrying and then make his way out of there. He couldn't believe the extremes he'd gone to just to get out of the office and the untenable position he'd found himself at NCIS. Some two thousand miles away from people he couldn't trust to watch his back even if he had ended up not in the Registan dessert of Afghanistan but in the red dirt of Sedona Arizona. It would have been different to trek across the Devil's Bridge with a backpack and have black coffee, hardtack, beef jerky and a can of beans for dinner for a change since he wasn't really a backpacker but sleeping under the stars was something he enjoyed and maybe he'd come this way again when he wasn't working this bat-crazy undercover opt.
The heat was intense and after he dug a hole in the sand with his bare hands and buried his evidence he covered the spot with the few loose rocks around and wiped away his footprints. He wondered why he couldn't be lucky and have a trusty roan stallion to dig up a pool of water in the sand like they did in Gibbs' favorite black and white westerns...even muddy water? Where was that trusty horse companion who could scent water and save the day like Trigger with his reliable stomping hoofs?
There was no water. There'd been no time to get even a canteen after he'd run out of there when the opportunity arose without looking back. Hopefully, he'd be able to get to the rendezvous place before the terrorists he was working with if he didn't become dehydrated to the extreme and become unable to continue. What were the odds? Determined, he had two days to find out.
He travelled another mile or so in the hottest part of the day but he pushed on because he knew he could find shelter in the barely-there mountains ahead. When he got there, he hunkered down between two naturally cool rocks and fell asleep or passed out from exhaustion, heat and dehydration. When it got dark, he woke up. Still no water but he started the trek again anyway in the right direction toward the town per the north star and relished the coolness of the falling temperature even though he'd be wishing for a little thermal heat as the night desert cold set in.
Walking under the stars gave him time to reflect on why he was walking under the stars and it all boiled down to a hissy-fit, though silent, temper tantrum on his part, at the crap-fest situation he was dealing with. He didn't trust Ziva, he couldn't count on Gibbs, and woman continued to get hurt after dealings with the Israeli agent. So he came in early morning months ago to work when he knew Vance would be there and demanded a transfer or he'd quit. "What's happened now?" said a resigned Vance.
Surprisingly, Vance listened after balling him out for bursting into his office and unexpectedly sympathized with DiNozzo's suspicions on what was going on. But Vance had a crafty solution. He had sometime ago stopped judging Gibbs' SFA negatively though he was still painfully annoying but maybe he hadn't made that clear to the man. Vance had learned his lesson as DiNozzo had proved several times over to be deviously clever, innovative and clear-thinking. His clownish behavior not so much in evidence these days and Vance had had the sudden thought that perhaps he had just finally grown up.
Whatever the cause, he trusted DiNozzo now with his insight and his concerns. Vance didn't doubt that there was something to what was troubling him but without proof there wasn't much he could do. "Bring me proof not suppositions and I will act accordingly," he'd told him. "What about Gibbs? Does he know?"
"He knows I won't work with her alone, he knows why. But he says the same thing, no proof." Tony straightened his shoulders. "So, I need to go then. Will you transfer me out, Sir, or not? If not, I'll take my three weeks vacation and accumulated sick leave now and..."
"Hold on, hold on, not so fast, DiNozzo."
So of course Wily Vance recognized this fortuitous moment and took advantage of it. He had several job offers for this man and living in an every-man-for himself way of thinking felt no compulsion to be loyal to Gibbs to not offer Tony a team of his own in six months and in the meantime an undercover opt he was trying to put together at request of the Sec Nav.
Surprised and suspicious Tony had questions; who'd be his backup, did he have a handler, one he could trust? Vance had assured him he would have backup and there was already an undercover agent in the camp who would watch his back. Trusting Vance to keep his word was iffy but Tony had no concrete reason not to believe him.
"And if I refuse the opt? The offer of a team will be rescinded I take it?"
"No, Agent DiNozzo," Vance said formerly, even a little insulted. "The offer was made in good faith. If you refuse the opt you'll have to wait out the six months here or as a floater until the Senior agent whose job you'll be taking retires."
Tony stared into the Director eyes and tended to believe him rather than not in this particular instance but still didn't exactly jump at the chance. When he got back to the bullpen, his coworkers were not there, Ziva had taken the team, Abby, Ducky, and even Jimmy to brunch while it was quiet to celebrate Ducky's birthday. He thought a note left on his desk was an invite to meet up with them when he was done with the higher-ups but the note was a snidely written put-down in Ziva's handwriting, "you snoozes, you loses is the correct saying, Tony? In his mind he heard the snigger accompanying the note and after that, his mind was made up but he slept on it overnight anyway and the next day was on a plane reasoning that in six months he'd have his own team. He could do that...if he wasn't killed by his new buddies homegrown navy terrorists and his body buried so deep even Gibbs' super senses and gut couldn't find his decaying lifeless corpse.
NCIS NCIS NCIS
Getting back to why he was out in the desert alone, the starry sky he was traveling under brought back the starry eyed merriment and fantasy conversation Ziva had had with Gibbs two months ago as she tried to explain why nothing Carol said could be taken seriously. 'Carol's lengthy and somewhat confused explanations amounted to her complete and utter fascination with all things Anthony DiNozzo.' Ziva smiled as she said that, not trying to hide her amusement as she glided smoothly over to Tony's desk.
"Surely, one can not take anything she says for real because of her worship sickness, her, ah, what are the words for that...fanatical zeal for Tony, correct?"
Tony had watched her manipulate her words carefully . "She said she wants to have your babies, Tony, but it has taken too long and she is tired of waiting for the two of you to accomplish this and I do believe from what she hinted at that there have been assignations here in the office and elsewhere with Senior as her next best choice."
Tim's confused stare and Gibbs' raised eyebrow couldn't have shown any more surprise than his own open-mouthed expression. What?... Senior here? For some reason, Abby, Ducky and Palmer were in the bullpen also, eyes opened wide in shock.
Ziva had continued to smirk with everyones eyes and attention on her as she stood in front of Tony's desk. "Those secretive meetings continued here where Senior roamed the floors of NCIS frequently and he and Carol would often meet up in an abandoned office."
Damn! He wouldn't put it past the old man, and Carol, well, she was an unknown entity to him too. But still...
"Did Carol say how they met, how she knew him?" Tony's quick question didn't floor Ziva to the undiscerning eye but Tony caught the brief change in her expression because he was looking for it before the sly smirk returned. "I did ask that Tony but she would not say, very suspicious, yes?"
"That's an understatement, Ziva, sounds more than suspicious." Gibbs sat thoughtfully as his team waited for his orders. Gibbs' hackles had risen with the thought of Senior roaming around the building freely. How could that happen and more importantly, Vance was do for a few words about the lack of security in this building. Yeah, Gibbs could picture that scenario with Leon Vance's temperament admittedly just as acerbic as his own 'don't tell me what to do, I'm the boss here' attitude. But it had to be done. In the meantime, Gibbs looked over at his Senior Field agent who was still eyeing Ziva, his expression not giving anything away as she answered her ringing phone. And Tony had nothing to say.
"What'd you find out from her supervisor, DiNozzo?" Gibbs questioned drawing the man's attention back to him.
Tony came out of his brain fog to answer. "I found out from her boss how Carol had come in to work last week but left right away. Claimed she wasn't feeling well and wasn't looking too good either. Her supervisor said she was pale, sweaty and shaky. Supervisor wanted to send someone home with her but Carol declined help and left, said she'd see her doctor if she didn't feel better by the next day. Funny thing was she filled a grocery bag with her private possessions on her desk and in the drawers like she wasn't coming back, said it was spring cleaning time."
Tim, who had been typing, listening and wondering at the undertones in the conversation between Tony and Ziva and the uneasy silences between them. Surely, Gibbs had picked up on it because it sure must have shown on his troubled face. But no one was paying attention to him so he kept listening. Another woman getting sick after interacting with Ziva. Not good. He wanted to talk to Tony when they could get a minute alone and find out what he was planning.
Tony indeed had plans. He'd go see Carol himself, find out what the problem was, what was she running from. Did it have anything to do with his father's warning. This time, he would find out the truth.
So Tony had gotten Carol Sutton's address from a party invitation she'd sent him; a party he hadn't attended legitimately because of MTAC work he and Gibbs were involved in the weekend of the party. When she'd dropped by his desk early that Monday morning after her party, that was the excuse he'd given her for not being there. The chilly, ice-particle glare she'd bestowed on him had given him the chills in return.
"It's too bad you couldn't make it, Tony, although both Ziva and Tim were there to help me celebrate my birthday and Ziva did say when I asked that you had the weekend off and had no other plans, and that you'd be here early today." And she'd stood there and stared at him as though waiting for him to produce a better excuse.
He'd waited too long to answer because his "Well yes, but.." was as far as he'd gotten as she abruptly turned on her high heels and stalked away without another word. Flummoxed and speechless, a rarity for him at her bold rudeness, he wondered who she imagined he was, her husband?
Still, Tony watched her go puzzled. He banked down his irritation at the woman expecting explanations and excuses from him, someone he barely knew, and tried to see the deeper picture. He hadn't been inclined to date her or shown her any interest as far as he knew, she was too intense and bossy. He hadn't intended to show up at her party and hadn't replied that he would anyway so what was with the attitude? And Ziva, what was she telling her? It seems she was sharing personal information about him to Carol including his work schedule and arrival time and who knew what else? Why? What was she up to?
Before Tony could confront Ziva that morning, a case came in; a case that kept them frantically busy in one of Gibbs' frenetic paces of activity as though the world depended on solving the case yesterday, so talking to Ziva was not in the books right then. He didn't forget about it, it was still there in the back of his mind but it could wait for a better time. After all, things were getting a little better as Gibbs didn't partner Ziva alone with him ever, hardly ever. And it not being a permanent solution did not escape him but the only other alternative was quitting his job.
Then the issue with Senior came up which halted the status quo and Carol got sick after tangling with Ziva. His suspicions aroused again that never really went away, he found out from Dolores that Carol was on sick leave and on a Saturday morning he went to see her.
NCIS NCIS NCIS
When Carol Sutton answered the doorbell, Tony almost didn't recognize her. Bone thin, the always fashionable, impeccably dressed and makeup meticulously applied woman was gone. Carol was in jeans, a sweatshirt, barefoot. No makeup, hair pulled back in a simple ponytail and the most incongruous, the horn rimmed glasses instead of contacts.
"Tony DiNozzo, funny that you should show up here." She wasn't surprised to see him there, in fact seemed almost relieved. "Come in please, have a seat." and she directed him to the dining room table where a few chairs were still in place. The rest of what he could see of the house was inundated with sealed boxes and still folded empty cardboard boxes against the walls.
"Sorry to drop in on you uninvited like this but I had a few questions regarding..."
"No problem, Ziva sent you, right?"
"Ziva? No she...," his mouth was still open when she blurted out impatiently.
"Never mind, it's okay, Tony! As you can see, I'm moving away. I have no issue with either you or Ziva and I haven't been in touch with your father in months. I had a ton of vacation time so I'm taking it before I actually hand in my resignation in case you already checked with Delores. I'm not going to cause any trouble and once I leave you and the rest of NCIS will never see or hear from me again."
Tony gave up trying to talk and just let Carol direct the conversation, conversation about her future life, her past mistakes and her objectives now. She hadn't once asked what he was doing there. She also hadn't taken a seat but stood in the entranceway to the dining room on alert as though preparing to escape quickly if necessary.
"I'm sorry I can't offer you anything to drink or eat, the cupboards and fridge are empty right now, you know, because I'm moving," she said with emphasis and a self-effacing smile. She talked some more, as though afraid to let him speak, in quick short bursts of words.
"Carol!" Tony having had enough ended the one-way 5 minute soliloquy abruptly even harshly. "What the hell is going on, what's wrong with you?"
Carol eyed him belligerently. "Come on, do you think I'm stupid. You know what's wrong and Ziva made her point so don't play games with me."
Tony tread carefully, "What point has Ziva made?"
Carol licked her lips nervously, "I thought Ziva sent you to, you know..."
"Yes, Carol, I know, but I want to hear it from you just to solidify things. You know how hearing things secondhand can get complicated. And I trust you, Carol, more so than other people might," he said.
Carol stared into his eyes closely as though trying to make up her mind about something. Just then her cellphone rang, she looked away startled and with a shake of her head and a decision made, she moved to open the front door. "I'm sorry Tony. I like you, you never did anything to me, you were always kind to me when you noticed me at all, but please go. I have nothing to say to you, about anything. Please just go."
"But, Carol...?"
"No, just go! "she said softly and closed the door quietly as he walked out.
When he got back to the office on Monday, Ziva asked if he'd seen Carol over the weekend as though she knew he had. The irrelevant thought entered his mind that maybe Carol's place was bugged and Ziva did know. So what, he hadn't learned anything so he admitted it. "Yes, and frankly, the woman was scared to stay around was my impression. She was packed and ready to run. Couldn't get anything of value out of her." And he ended the conversation.
NCIS NCIS NCIS
So here he was trudging along, thirsty and cold in this dry, barren land covered in no vegetation and waterless. He hallucinated that he saw dim lights ahead, figured he had made a wrong turn and contemplated an about-face change of course but really, it was easier to just plough his way through the sand step by step than alter his course so he kept going straight ahead.
When he bumped into the side of a Jeep, he made his feet stop moving and slid down the door to the ground and sat there breathing raggedly. Voices woke him from his stupor, unfriendly voices arguing in, was that Russian, headed his way. He looked left, right, no place to hide so he unceremoniously scrambled under the Jeep and flattened himself as best he could hoping the men would walk on by quickly. But no luck, the men stopped, got in the car he was under and started to drive away fast. Tony thought he had most of his body parts tucked in but the vehicle jerked a little in stick shift and backed up right into his left fibula. He put his face down into the dirt road and held back the scream (and the tears) as the vehicle finished its torture and sped off.
The pain was intense but Tony didn't feel the ankle bone was broken or at least he hadn't heard the crackle that usually accompanied a broken body bone but it still radiated fiery intense throbbing pain. He managed to crawl to the side of the dirt road and down a very slight embankment that wouldn't conceal him from anyone walking by come daylight but at least gave him a few minutes to shake off the confusion and pain and get oriented. He was in some desert town off the main highway with no signal lights but lights from a few scattered houses lit the way down the one paved road into town. A bar/restaurant establishment stood out advertising in neon Good eats Best drinks but he doubted the veracity of that.
As it was, he realized he'd stumbled into the town that had been his destination all along and all he needed to do was find a hiding place and wait for the calvary. And some water. He threw himself back down and hugged the dirt. 'Lets be realistic, DiNozzo', he thought. Moseying up to the only restaurant in this dismal town, that wasn't gonna work. And laying here in abject misery was a losers play. So he focused on what he should try next. How about, follow the little black dog who had smelled him for sure but hadn't come close skulking around, tail between its legs, eyes averted?
But then again, the dog didn't look like there was a welcome doggie bed somewhere for him or bowls of water and food lovingly set out either. Tony threw off the malaise and started to follow the dog because if anyone or thing knew how to hide, it was this poor wretched, neglected critter. He hopped along in the dirt and followed the dog back the way he had come to a ramshackle old building still standing in a cluster of other dilapidated abandoned buildings.
"Thanks, Fido," he whispered under his breath as the dog disappeared down a hole it had dug under the building wall. He couldn't hop anymore so he was down on his hands and knees again and crawled to the front door hoping it was not locked... but it was. Kicking it down was not an option, too much noise plus he had the strength of a newborn baby and he couldn't walk much less kick with his injured ankle.
He crawled to where the dog had been able to slip under the wall but he was too big to get in that way. The window further along was already broken so painful as this probably would be, he pushed aside broken pieces of glass as best he could and hopped up onto the sill and threw himself down on the floor. Of course, a piece or two of broken glass wanted to keep him there and ripped into his right arm when he had other ideas. Now he was bleeding from his gouged arm and his ankle was on fire. He shook off the pain and looked around, no sign of the little dog, no barking. Maybe the dog had slipped in then back out through some other crack but Tony was alright with that, 'no all for one and one for all, huh, Fido?' he thought deliriously, as he scrabbled around looking for a sink or even a toilet; water was his main concern at the moment it almost didn't matter where it came from. The building was empty of furniture but could have been a small office in its heyday. Now there was just dust, cobwebs and dirt. He was finished. He couldn't crawl anymore, there were spots before his eyes and his head was spinning. And there was something hard, solid and unyielding pressed into his back as he lay sprawled face down on the hard cruddy floor.
"Don't move!"