This chapter is about John coming to terms with what has happened to him and the rest of his family trying to get him to lighten up and act like a child. After all, he could be this way for a long time.
Chapter 5: What now?
Twenty-four hours after the incident with Torren, John was sitting on the infirmary bed waiting to be released, he felt much better than he had the day before. He knew that he would have to apologise to Rodney and Carson in the near future, but that would have to wait for another time, as he couldn't wait to get home. He knew that things would be strange, especially with Torren, but he would still like to try and make him understand.
Jennifer came in and startled him out of his thoughts, "how are you feeling Colonel, are you ready to go home?"
"I sure am, and can you please remember to call me John, as for the moment I am a ten-year-old child." He told her while swinging his short legs backward and forwards on the edge of the exam bed.
"Okay John, are you ready to go home?"
"When can I lose the bandage on my hand doc?" John whined.
"I want you to keep it on during the day and then you can take it off at night. If you need a shower, put a plastic bag over it and try not to get it wet." Jennifer explained.
"Umm…., how am I supposed to do other things, like going to the toilet?" He asked innocently.
Jennifer blushed before answering him, "You may need to sit down."
"Okay…," was all that he said.
"Anyway, let's look at the hand and then I'll give you a course of antibiotics to take with you."
She got to work and undid his bandage and after carefully looking at his hand she bandaged it up again. She looked at the stitches on his head and then put a large bandage back on as well.
"Everything looks okay, I want to see you in three days and if all look's good, I'll take your stitches out of your head and take off the bandage on your hand," Jennifer explained.
"How is he, Dr Keller?" Dave asked, entering the room.
"He's ready to go; I'll see him in three days unless there are any problems," Jennifer explained to him, before leaving the room.
"Hey Dave, what are you doing here?" John asked with confusion.
He now saw a look of confusion cross Dave's face, "I thought that Teyla had explained everything to you."
"No, she hasn't come to see me all morning. Have you seen her, is she alright, is Torren alright?" The questions tumbled out of his mouth, as he was suddenly overcome by a sense of worry and fear.
"They are fine, but I have no idea why Teyla hasn't talked to you?"
John sighed, all he wanted to know right now was, was he going home or not and if not why?
"Dave can please tell me what is going on?"
John waited for an explanation and he suspected that Dave was nervous about something, finally, Dave answered him, "Umm…it's been decided that because Torren doesn't really comprehend who you are, it would be better for you to stay with me and Jane for a while. Teyla was supposed to run it by you. I assumed that she had that is why I came to pick you up."
That was all John needed to hear right now. The women he loved had pushed him away, but then that was nothing new, he had always been lousy at relationships. Perhaps he would try and talk to her later, or maybe he would wait for her to come to him. For now, he knew that the only thing he could really do was to go home with Dave. Looking down at the oversized gown he was wearing he wondered whether anyone had actually managed to find him any clothes.
"Hey Dave, do you know if anyone has managed to find me any clothes?"
Dave walked out of the room and left him sitting alone, he started to swing his legs again, which was something that he'd always done as a kid when he was nervous or worried. He'd somehow managed to grow out of it in his teenage years though.
Dave came back a few minutes later with a pile of clothes. "Apparently these are some clothes that Claudia has put away for Tyler when he gets a bit older; she had said that you can use them for now.
"Great, just what I need, to be seen wearing another kid's clothes."
"Don't worry about it; I don't think that Tyler even knows she has them," Dave told him with a hint of sympathy in his voice.
"Can you leave the room now, so I can get dressed?" He asked and he certainly hoped that he would be able to manage it himself.
Once Dave had left the room he eventually managed to get the clothes on, the jeans were reasonably easy to get on despite his sore shoulder, but when it came to lifting his arms over his head to get the t-shirt on, his shoulder screamed in agony. He knew that as soon as he got back to Dave's place, he'd have to take some pain meds. There was no way he was going to tell Jennifer he was in pain in case she wanted to keep him in the infirmary for a bit longer.
When Dave came back a few minutes later, he was completely dressed except for his shoes and socks.
"Claudia gave me these shoes for you to use John," I'm not sure whether they are going to fit you or not."
"Great, can you help me get them on?" John scowled.
He sat still with his head down while Dave put the shoes on for him, he then helped him put his sling, back on; would the embarrassment and humiliation ever end?
Once Dave had finished John turned to him and said, "Let's just get out of here then Dave; and I want to talk to Teyla later? That's if she wants to talk to me."
John was about to jump off the bed and then he realised that he was shorter than he used to be. His right arm was still in a sling and his left hand was heavily bandaged, so he might just need some help to get down.
Dave must have read his mind, "Do you need some help little brother?" Dave asked with a twinkle in his eye.
John just gave him a deadpan look, to let him know that he wasn't amused. "Yes, Dave I need some help, and can you stop calling me little brother, because right now it's not cute and it certainly isn't amusing."
"Sorry, I can't imagine any of this is easy for you and I assure you that Dr McKay is spending most of his time in his lab trying to find an answer."
"Thanks, Dad, now can we please go home?" John said with as much sarcasm as he could muster.
John felt totally embarrassed when Dave lifted him off the exam bed, but he knew that it was the only way that he was going to get down, so he closed his eyes and put up with it.
When he was standing on the floor again, he felt the need to leave the infirmary in a hurry, there was no way that he was going to stay here any longer than he had too.
"Come on John, let's go home and get some lunch. Jane is at school at the moment, but she should be home for lunch shortly."
"I guess I'll probably be going to school tomorrow since there really isn't anything else for me to be doing right now."
"Why don't you just have some fun John, for the moment you're a little kid, why not act like one. I'll let you know what you were like when you were a kid if you can't remember."
He didn't know whether he really liked that idea or not, but he knew that he'd have plenty of time to think about it in the near future, so he just looked at Dave and said, "let's go to your place, Dave?"
John kept his head down as they walked through the corridors, there was no way that he wanted any of his men to see him like this. He had absolutely no idea what they had been told or who was in command while Lorne was off-world, but why would they bother to tell him anything, he wasn't in command at the moment, not to mention he looked like a child.
They finally entered Dave's apartment and he was relieved that he hadn't come across any of his men in that time. Looking around the apartment, he realised that it was similar to the one that he shared with Teyla but smaller.
"Dave can you show me to my room, so that I can have another nap," John asked suddenly feeling exhausted again.
"Head down the hall and to the left," Dave told him from the kitchen.
John just nodded and walked down the hallway towards his temporary room, he really hoped at some point soon, he would be able to be with Teyla again, but for now, he knew that was impossible.
Once he found his room he took a good look around and found that it was very similar in size and shape, to Torrren's room and in the middle of the room there was a small bed.
There was absolutely nothing else for him to do right now, so he lay down and closed his eyes and he willed sleep to come.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Teyla looked down at her sleeping son, she knew that she should probably be heading to the infirmary to explain to John what was happening regarding his accommodation, but she couldn't bring herself to wake her son.
She knew that she was the one that was supposed to be talking to John about what was going on, but she couldn't bear to see the strong capable man that she loved with all of her heart, being contained in a child's body.
Sitting down on one of the little chairs in Torren's room she put her head in her hands, what was to become of her relationship with John, what was Torren's relationship with him going to be? Rodney had better find a way to fix it because if he didn't, she would personally kill him herself, even though she suspected that she would have to beat Ronon to it. She was fairly sure that Dave would want to have a go at killing him as well. So basically, if Rodney didn't fix this quickly, he was a dead man.
When a small hand patted her on the knee, she looked up straight into the eyes of Torren, "Hello darling did you have a nice sleep?"
Torren merely nodded, "are you Otay Momma?" He asked her still gently patting her knee.
"Yes, darling I was just thinking about Daddy and how I can't wait to see him again."
"I miss Daddy too." Torren paused and rubbed his eyes before saying anything else, "can we go and see John. He must miss his Momma and Daddy too."
"He is going to be staying with your Uncle Dave and Aunty Jane for a while, so perhaps we can go and visit them for lunch."
"When lunch?" Torren asked, looking around the room.
"What are you looking for darling? "Teyla asked with confusion.
"I loot for daddy shirt."
"Do not worry I will get you one for your afternoon nap, but for now would you like to get ready and go and visit John, Uncle Dave and Aunty Jane for lunch?"
"I go to toilet Momma?"
Teyla had been trying to toilet train him during the last four weeks that they spent on earth and finally he seemed to be getting the right idea.
"Off you go then."
Once she had watched her son toddle off to the bathroom, she put her head in her hands again, when would it ever end? John was always being kidnapped, or injured, but nothing could have prepared her for this. She wondered whether if John were ever returned to normal whether it would be a good idea to be in a relationship with him. Perhaps Rodney was right when he called him a trouble magnet or Colonel Calamity.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Rodney sat staring at his computer screen, and he had no idea how long he'd been sitting there. His lab had been put back to normal, other than a few charred walls, so now all his time was spent trying to find a way to fix Sheppard. Unfortunately, it didn't seem to be going too well, he suspected that whatever happened to Sheppard was some kind of secret research that was buried behind walls of encryption unless you had the device and was able to use it to reverse it. He suspected that if he didn't come up with something soon that people would be lining up to kill him and Teyla would be at the front of the queue.
His thoughts were interrupted when Zelenka entered the lab and started talking, "Rodney how are you going with your research?"
Rodney had to bite his tongue to stop shouting at his friend, but it didn't stop him from sarcastically talking to him, "I'd be going a lot quicker if people stopped interrupting me."
"I am sorry Rodney, but I thought you might like some sandwiches and I was going to put a pot of coffee on," Zelenka told him and then placed a plate of sandwiches in front of him.
"Thanks, Radek, I really appreciate that and the answer to your question is that I can't find any indication of what experiments they were doing with this device and I can't find any way to fix this."
"What if we see if we can find another device, like the one that was destroyed?" Radek suggested.
"Actually, I think that is probably the best idea you've ever had, and I don't know why I didn't think of it." Rodney said being uncharacteristically kind, right before he insulted his friend, "but I probably would have thought of it before too long anyway."
It didn't take Rodney long to realise that he'd probably just insulted Zelenka, but he seemed oblivious to it, so who was he to say anything.
"Shall we start looking through the artifact database? I can help you if you like?" Radek suggested.
Rodney grabbed a sandwich and stood up and stretched, before heading over to the coffee pot, "that sounds great, how about you start, and I'll make the coffee."
He was relieved when Radek sat down and started peering through the database, but it wasn't long before the little scientist started talking again, "Why do you think that it was only the Colonel that was shrunk and not his clothes?"
Wow that peace lasted all of two seconds, he thought rubbing his temple, feeling an almighty headache coming on and if Radek wasn't quiet soon he would have to be rude and throw him out of the lab. "Gee honestly I don't know, that isn't really the first thing I thought of when a mini Sheppard was vomiting and bleeding all over the floor of my lab, perhaps I'll put it at the end of a very long list of questions that need to be answered. The first one being how the hell do we switch him back!" He had totally lost his patience, by the time he had finished.
"Okay, okay, don't shout, I was just wondering," Zelenka said, before speaking in his native language for a few sentences, which Rodney knew he did when he was frustrated, or angry.
"And don't swear at me, Radek. I don't appreciate it." Rodney sighed, he knew that if he and Radek continued to argue, they would never achieve anything, so he decided to be the better man and apologise first. "Look Radek, I'm sorry for being impatient with you, so how about I make the coffee and then we can get back to work."
"I apologise for swearing at you Rodney and I agree let's get to work, the quicker we find something the quicker we can get the Colonel back to normal."
A few minutes later Rodney put a steaming cup of hot coffee in front of Zelenka and sat beside him and started to look through the ancient database. He knew that there had to be another device like the one that was destroyed somewhere and he wanted to be the one to find it.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
John awoke from his nap and hear voices in the lounge room, he was fairly sure that it was Teyla and Torren, but then why would they be in Dave's apartment. Teyla had pretty much pushed him away at a time when he really needed her, it wasn't his fault that he looked like a child and there was nothing he could do about it right now, so why couldn't she just enjoy being with him.
Torren, of course, was a different matter and he had no idea how a two-year-old could ever understand why his father looked like a child. It was really too much for his aching head to take, so he decided to roll over and go back to sleep, but that idea was squashed a few minutes later when someone entered the room, "whoever you are I don't want to talk right now. I have a headache and I want to go back to sleep?"
"John I am sorry that I did not tell you what we had planned for you, but I am having difficulty in dealing with this," Teyla told him and he could hear the sadness in her voice.
He didn't know what to say to her, so he just stared at the opposite wall. She doesn't know how to handle this, well what about me I have the body of a frigging ten-year-old. The more he thought about it the more he knew that he didn't want to talk to her right now.
"If you want to talk, Torren and I are in the lounge," Teyla told him and he could hear her beginning to back out of the room.
His small heart almost broke, so he had no choice, but to turn around and look at her with his small hazel eyes. "Teyla I'm sorry, but this is really hard on me and I would really appreciate your support right now."
"I understand John, but for now I still think the best thing is for you to stay with Dave and Jane. I do not think that Torren understands what is going on, so I think that he would just prefer to think that his Daddy is away."
John nodded, he knew that it was for the best, but that didn't stop it from breaking his heart. "If you head out to the lounge, I will join you in a minute."
Once she had left the room, John thought the lights on and went over to the mirror to have a look at himself and he wasn't impressed by what he saw; his hair was sticking up all over the place like it always did, his eyes were still a deep hazel, his ears were still pointed at the tips, but they were much smaller, he was about 4 ft, or 122cm tall, which from what he could remember was below average height for a ten-year-old boy and he was as thin as a rake. The thing that shocked him the most though was the innocence in his face. Basically, he was an old soul in an innocent child's body. He was surprised that he looked pretty much the same as he did when he was ten, the first time around.
Sighing, he decided it was time to go and face Teyla and Torren. Perhaps it was time to start acting like a child and befriend and play with his son.
Walking into the lounge, he almost groaned when he saw that Claudia and Carson were there with Beth and Tyler.
"Hey John," Claudia said, "Tyler and Beth wanted to meet the new kid on Atlantis."
He just glared at Dave, "really Dave, why would you do this to me?"
It was Torren who answered the question for his Uncle, "you need friends when you're sad."
Out of the mouths of babes, John thought looking at his son. He might as well play along for now, but at the first opportunity, he was going to talk to Woolsey about heading off-world until Rodney could put it right. He had never felt so embarrassed in his life as he felt right now. And what was worse was the adults in the room seemed to be playing along with the kids' plans. He decided that he couldn't handle this, so he was going to go back to his room until they had all gone.
"Umm… I'm not feeling too good right now, so I think that I'm just going to go back to my room."
He turned and left the room and was relieved when he was safely behind his bedroom door, which he took no time in locking. He would open it again at some point in the near future and he had no idea when that would be.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Dave watched his brother leave the room and he could sense his pain. It had probably been unfair to invite Claudia and the kids around for lunch, but then technically it was Torren's idea. Great, I'm blaming it on a two-year-old. He turned and looked at the others in the room and he realised that they all looked shocked, as if they had no idea what they should do next, so he decided for them.
"I don't think that John will be coming out again this afternoon, so perhaps you should all leave, and we will share lunch another time."
They all nodded and one by one they left the room until it was just Teyla and Torren left behind.
Teyla looked at him and he could see the sadness in her eyes, he knew how much she and John loved each other, so he knew that this whole situation must be totally killing her, "Please tell John that I am sorry?" She said as she picked up her son and left the apartment.
He was left standing in the centre of the apartment by himself, he knew that he should probably speak to John to explain why he had invited everyone including the kids over, but he also knew that John probably wouldn't understand.
Now is as good a time as any, he thought as he headed towards his brother's room. He had no idea how John continued to live this kind of life, it seemed like this kind of thing was a common occurrence for his brother and he wasn't sure that he wanted to stay on Atlantis if that was the case.
He arrived at John's door to find that he had locked it, "John can you let me in? As I really need to talk to you," he asked knocking on the door.
He was relieved when the door opened rather quickly, so he took that as an invitation and walked in to find that John was lying on the bed staring at the ceiling.
Dave approached the bed and gently sat down next to him, "John I am sorry that I invited everyone over, I was really hoping that you would lighten up and have some fun."
"How can I lighten up and have some fun, I look like a frigging ten-year-old?" John scowled.
Dave looked at him with compassion, his little brother was hurting and there was nothing he could do to fix it and that was something that he hadn't felt for John in a long time; except perhaps a few times over the last eight weeks or so. "Well the way I see it is until this is reversed, and your shoulder is healed, you don't have anything else to do, so you might as well enjoy yourself."
"I guess you're right, but I don't think that I'll be able to lighten up around here, so tomorrow I'm going to see Woolsey and ask him if I can go and visit Halling and the Athosians until Rodney can put this right."
Dave didn't like his idea one little bit, but he didn't want to argue with him, "are you sure John, there are people around here who really care about you and what about Teyla, does she know what you're planning?"
"I'm guessing that Teyla doesn't really want me around, considering she didn't even bother to tell me what you had planned for me. You know what Dave, despite the way I look right now I am still a grown-up and can make my own decisions, so this is what I have decided and no-one, not you and not even Teyla can change my mind!" John said, with his anger clearly rising.
Dave had forgotten how stubborn he could be, so he let the matter drop, as he could sense that John was ready for an argument and he certainly didn't want that right now, "okay John I respect your decision, but will you let me go with you and see the Athosians, as I would love to finally meet Teyla's people?"
He watched John's face and despite the innocent eyes that stared at him, he could see that John was clearly thinking it over in his usual calculated way. Finally, a smile lit up his small face and he spoke, "I would love that Dave."
Dave smiled back, "I'm going to leave you alone for a while, but if you want to come out, I'm the only one here at the moment."
John nodded at him and Dave was relieved to see that he had closed his eyes. Slowly backing out of the room, he closed the door and left his little brother in peace.
TBC…
There is definitely trouble on the way for Atlantis in future chapters.
Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and commented so far, I really appreciate it.