Annie pushed the stroller into the hospital she knew she was showing up after rounds but she was on maternity leave and didn't care. She was just there to hang out with her friends for their last day of residency, for many of the people she worked with it would be the first time they saw baby Ellie who was now five weeks old.
"Dr Altman," Eaket approached.
"Eaket, it's good to see you," Annie greeted.
"You brought your baby," Eaket said, "can I see her?"
Annie smiled, "come see Ellie."
"Are you coming back," Eaket asked.
"Board exam results come out in an hour," Annie said, "if that went how I wanted it to then yes. I'm the peds cardio fellow."
"Can I be on your service," Eaket asked, "I miss working with you."
"I'm not back yet," Annie said, "I'm just here for last day fun and to show Ellie the hospital. We'll talk in September when I come back."
"I want to be your resident," Eaket said, "keep working on the Altman method."
"Aren't you still working with mama," Annie asked.
"She's not you," Eaket replied.
"She's an incredible teacher," Annie said, "learn from her."
"I want cardio," Eaket said.
"I can be a good mentor but mama she's your teacher," Annie replied, "she trained Christina Yang."
"I still want to work with you," Kira said.
"You will but you have Christina Yang, Maggie Pierce and Teddy Altman," Annie said, "you have incredible surgeons to learn from. Kira take advantage of that. Three very different yet incredible surgeons, cardio goddess to learn from. I'm a fellow I'm not an attending."
"Can you teach me to get kids to like me," Eaket asked.
"Working with kids I can do and will when I come back," Annie promised, "right now I have one baby girl who needs my full attention."
"Is she a good baby," Eaket asked.
"She's not much of a sleeper, the world is too exciting," Annie said, "but not super fussy unless she's hungry."
Eaket hesitated, "do you think I could hold her?"
Annie hesitated, she wasn't ready to see her daughter passed around the hospital by her interns. Ellie wasn't vaccinated yet, she couldn't get her first vaccines for three weeks.
"She hasn't been vaccinated yet so we're not really playing pass the baby except for family and close friends. I haven't even let Webber hold her yet. I'm going to go look for Josh," Annie said, "you can walk with us."
"Dr Riggs is in OR3," Kira replied, "you're getting her vaccinated."
"We're both doctors, what do you think?' You're seeing too many anti vaxxers in peds. Walk with us to the gallery and fill me in on what I've missed in the last couple months," Annie smiled, "Ellie bug lets go see daddy operate. Do you want to see daddy save a life?"
"Hi sweetheart," Teddy greeted, "you're early."
"We thought we would come and hang out," Annie said, "we're going to go watch Josh operate."
"I'll come with you," Teddy said, "but first I need to see Ellie."
"Ellie's sleeping," Annie said.
"One grandma hug won't wake her," Teddy said.
"You wake a sleeping baby you get her back to sleep," Annie said, "she was up all night again."
"Still nocturnal," Teddy asked.
"Getting better but she's still feeding every two and a half hours," Annie said
"That's better," Teddy said.
"From two to two and a half I'm still exhausted," Annie said, "I need more sleep. This sleep deprivation is taking its toll."
"Josh coming back to work this week isn't helping is it," Teddy said.
"No we just need a routine," Annie said, "if I could get Ellie to take the bottle and Josh would do one night time one with it it would make a difference. If I could get more than 2 hours of sleep at once."
"I remember this," Teddy said, "I think you need to be out of sight when he gives her a bottle. He needs to take her to another room so she can't see or hear you. Do you want me to try today?"
"Not today," Annie said, "I didn't bring a bottle today, trying to avoid the scene of fighting her to take it and screaming baby. We may come to your office or an on call room when she's hungry, we should have about an hour and a half."
"Do what you need to do," Teddy said.
"This is hard," Annie admitted as the elevator doors closed behind them.
"It is," Teddy agreed.
"With Josh working this week I feel alone," Annie said, "he's working, my friends are all packing to move or working and I'm home by myself with Ellie."
"Jenna is staying here, so is Cassidy," Teddy said, "but yes it's lonely. Annie what could you do?"
"I don't know," Annie said, "I've never had time at home. I had a summer job at 14 going into grade ten yes it was just picking berries for grandpa but I worked 10 hour days six days a week. I don't know how to do this. I feed Ellie, change her, put her down for a nap and do housework. That's not me mama. My brain needs to do more."
"I know," Teddy said, "I remember saying the same thing to Bailey when I brought Allison for a visit."
"I've spent 24 years thinking and learning then to be told to stay home and do nothing," Annie said, "it's hard. I love Ellie and I love being her mom but I'm lonely. I'm not a good mom because I want to do more than be with my baby."
"Annie you're a good mom. Ellie is happy, she's a calm baby, she's gaining weight. You've never really been alone," Teddy said, "you've done nights when you and Josh are on opposite schedules but you've been with people all day then. You never lived alone, you had your friends at UBC , Steph in Boston then Josh. You're used to having people to talk to."
"I talk to Ellie but she doesn't understand yet," ANnie said.
"Does she respond at all," Teddy asked.
"She sometimes tries to turn her head to me if I'm not holding her, she likes when I sing," Annie said, "she's always looking at me if I'm holding her. I'm starting to get some eye contact like actually looking at my eyes. We would have been here sooner today but she doesn't like being put down and it took a while to get her in her swing so I could do my hair, then she was hungry. I tried to be here for rounds but getting her out the door is tough."
"It's the first time you've gotten her ready to go out by yourself," Teddy said, "you'll get the hang of it. I used to leave the diaper bag packed by the door so it was one less thing to do."
"I wish I knew what she was thinking," Annie said, "if she even knows Josh and I there and that she's loved."
"She knows. She'll smile soon," Teddy promised.
"I get little half smiles," Annie said, "as she falls asleep or after eating."
"She's happy with you," Teddy said.
"Should we take her up to the gallery," Annie asked.
"Starting her young," Teddy laughed.
"You did with Allison," Annie replied.
"Park the stroller in my office," Teddy said, "it's a crowded gallery today."
"I brought the carrier," Annie said.
"Just carry her or put her in that," Teddy agreed.
"I like the carrier," Annie said, "hands free, she'll sleep in it and if I do it right I can feed her in it without disrupting the whole gallery."
"Do you need help," Teddy asked.
"Maybe," Annie said, "Josh used it last. I haven't put it on myself yet. He always helps me."
"Give me Ellie," Teddy said as they pushed the stroller into her office.
"You can pick her up," Annie offered.
Teddy scooped Ellie up, "hi Ellie. I've missed you this week. You're getting so big. Are you looking at grandma?"
Ellie looked up at Teddy. She knew the voice and there was something familiar about the face, the eyes looked just like her mommys.
"Hi sweet girl," Teddy said kissing the baby's forehead, "what are you thinking about? This is a new place isn't it. You're in grandma's office, you'll spend lots of time here with me and mommy. When you go to daycare I'm going to come sign you and Ali and Leo out and we can all play and cuddle. Today Mommy and I are going to take you up to the gallery and we're going to see an operating room and watch daddy and grandpa operate so you can see where all the magic happens."
"Okay I'm ready to put Ellie in the carrier," Annie said.
"I want to snuggle her more," Teddy said.
"Mama I want her in the carrier to avoid playing pass the baby," Annie said, "I don't want her passed to the entire surgical staff."
"Fine," Teddy fake pouted.
"You'll get time with her before we go home," Annie said, "can you grab the bag from the bottom of the stroller?"
"I've got it," Teddy replied. She watched as Annie strapped the baby into the carrier.
Teddy watched Annie lead the way back to the elevator, she thought that her daughter looked cute today. Annie still had some baby weight but Teddy wasn't worried, it would go away when Annie started running and swimming again. Annie's petite frame had filled out slightly, she looked healthy, Teddy had always worried about how tiny Annie was, her oldest always bordered on being too thin. Annie's coral coloured summer dress fit her perfectly with the full skirt starting just below her ribs and falling to her knees, the top buttoned up the front, Annie had hidden the narrow straps under her denim jacket, hiding the scar on her back as always. She was cute and put together with her hair half up. Seeing how cute and stylish Annie looked Teddy felt old and frumpy in her black skirt and green top.
"Annie," Jenna shrieked seeing her friend at the door.
"Jenna," Annie greeted.
"You brought Ellie," Jenna smiled.
"I'm still on maternity leave for a few more weeks," Annie said.
"Are you having lunch with us," Jenna asked.
"Of course," Annie replied, "we're here for the last shift."
"Last day of residency can you believe it," Jenna smiled.
"My last day here," Julia chimed in.
Annie put one arm around Julia, "I'm going to miss you Jules. But we're having a final party at the house Saturday before everyone leaves. You'll be there?"
"I will, one last party in your yard. You'll have to come visit and bring this little one to see me," Julia smiled running her hand over Ellie's head.
Annie smiled, "we will. And you'll have to come visit us."
"I will," Julia promised, "my best friends are staying here."
"Do your fellowship and come back," Jenna suggested, "it's mama Altman."
"Your surgical innovation fellowship is amazing," Annie said, "I can't wait to hear what you do. You have to tell me."
Teddy was observing from the other side of the gallery she realized that Annie may be right about needing her friends and to use her brain.
"Ellie bug do you want to see what daddy and grandpa are doing," Annie asked.
"She doesn't understand you yet," Julia laughed.
"It keeps her calm and she's pretty alert right now, she woke up when we came in," Annie said, she walked to the intercom and pushed the button, "Dr Riggs you have a visitor in the gallery."
Josh looked up and beamed seeing Annie in the gallery with Ellie.
"Hi Ellie," Josh called, "did you come to see daddy operate? Is mommy showing you the hospital?"
"Hi baby bug," Owen called, "grandpa will come see you as soon as we're done saving this man. Do you have hugs for me today?"
"We'll meet you in the scrub room when you're done," Annie smiled.
"Don't let your mama steal all the baby cuddles," Owen teased.
"I won't Uncle Owen," Annie replied.
"How's she doing today," Josh asked as he sewed bleeders.
"She's happy today," Annie said, "really alert right now. I think she likes watching."
"Are you okay," Josh asked.
"It feels good to be back," Annie smiled, "even if we're just visiting."
"We're going to finish up and we'll see you after," Owen declared.
The new interns were whispering. Who was the blonde woman she came in with the chief the, Chief of trauma and his fellow were talking to her baby.
Kira Eaket whispered to her interns, "that's Dr Grace Altman. The chief's daughter and the peds cardio fellow."
"Why isn't she in scrubs," an intern asked.
"She's on maternity leave," Eaket explained, "her baby is maybe six weeks tops."
"But dr Hunt and dr Riggs," an intern began.
"Dr Owen Hunt is the chief's husband, Dr Altman's stepfather," Eaket explained, "the younger dr Altman is married to the younger dr Riggs. They were my residents last year."
"They," the intern asked.
"They pooled their groups and both worked with us," Eaket said, "you want her to teach you to work with kids."
"That baby is quiet," the intern said.
"She's Mary Poppins," Eaket replied.
"That's Mary Poppins," the intern continued, "I've heard of her. My roommate did her sub internship here. Last November. She didn't say anything about Mary Poppins having kids."
"No one knew until after Christmas," Tyson George cut in, "dr Altman and dr Riggs keep their personal life private."
"New intern whispers," Annie laughed with Jenna.
"You're going to stop them," Jenna asked.
"I'm being called a magical Disney nanny nope," Annie laughed, "auntie Jenna do you want to cuddle Ellie?"
"Please," Jenna said, "you're a baby hog."
"You like to come by at food or nap time," Annie said, "she's currently awake and happy. She'll want to eat soon."
Annie's friends took turns passing around the baby.
"I'll give her her bottle," Cassidy offered.
"I didn't bring bottles," Annie replied, "i'll need my baby back to feed her."
"You'll feed her here," Cassidy said, "you can anywhere and no one can say a word."
"Maybe or I'll take her to an on call room, I'll read the room," Annie replied.
Sitting behind Annie , April whispered, "you feed your baby wherever you're comfortable."
When Ellie began to fuss Annie took her back from Jenna whispering to her friends, "we're going to the on call room by the back stairs."
"Do you want company," Cassidy asked.
"We'll be back in about half an hour," Annie said, "I'm happy to chat after but no one wants to see that."
"We're all doctors," Julia said, "let's do the last day together."
"You save my seat and make fun of my husband," Annie said, "we'll be back. I prefer to be alone for this. It's easier for me if I'm alone to relax a d feed her."
"We'll save your seat," Julia agreed. She knew Annie had always been incredibly sensitive about people seeing her body and realized she may be even more so now.
Annie returned to the gallery and watched the rest of the surgery with Ellie sleeping in the carrier against her chest. When Josh went to scrub out Annie grabbed the diaper bag and walked down to the scrub room.
"Hey," Josh greeted.
"Hey yourself," Annie said kissing him.
"So babies first day at the hospital," Josh smiled.
"We've only seen an on call room and the gallery," Annie said.
"We'll show her around," Josh agreed.
"When she wakes back up," Annie said, "she's had lots of snuggles from her aunties and just had a really long snack."
"Do you want me to take her," Josh asked.
"She's content right now," Annie said.
Josh bent to kiss Ellie's head, "hi baby."
Seeing everyone else had scrubbed out and left Annie said, "the navy scrubs are pretty sexy there Dr Riggs."
"You like them Altman," Josh teased.
"I do," Annie winked, "definitely hot."
"They'll look better on you," Josh teased.
"A couple months," Annie said.
They enjoyed lunch with their friends for the final time as residents. They grabbed their lunches and sat at their usual table in the cafeteria. Josh held Ellie while they ate. Many of the attendings and jr residents came by to see and admire Ellie who slept through the whole thing. At nearly six weeks the longest Ellie could stay awake at once was just under an hour. They finished lunch and followed their friends to the lecture hall where Richard had one final speech for this class.
"Today we say goodbye to our fifth year class," Richard began, "this has been a class unlike any other. They have struggled and grown together as a team. It's always hard to say goodbye to the people you grow up with. Together you took your first baby steps opening, holding retractors, appys, solo surgeries. You competed to be the first or the best at something. As a team you grew and built each other up. Together you became stronger. Congratulations! Please for those of you leaving us keep in touch. Once you've done your residency with me you're always one of mine. I'm proud of all of you! Can we get a round of applause for our fifth year class."
Teddy took the podium, "today is a day to celebrate personally and professionally. I'm pleased to announce that our entire fifth year class passed their oral board exams. I revived that notification as you were being seated. Individual scores will be posted later today but you all passed. This group is one I feel like I've raised. In my talks with dr Webber and dr Bailey we've discussed intern groups that you form an attachment to and mentor not just professionally but personally. My fifth year class is one I am deeply attached to. I returned to Grey Sloan after three years with MedCom about five weeks after you arrived. I admit my arrival created a bit of drama and confusion. Suddenly we had two Altman's. That first year was a wild roller coaster ride for all of us. It was a year of firsts, surgeries, saves, wins and loses. It was also when you bonded. I'm looking at our fifth years, the 12 of you who are leaving us and the 8 who are staying. For the last five years you have been part of my family. I am proud of all of you. This is the first group to give me a nick name, while it may not be as intimidating as when they called Bailey the nazi or Grey Medusa, mama Altman fits. At first you were my daughter's colleagues as I've gotten to know all of you I've discovered incredible talents. I know I speak for all of our attendings when I say we're proud of you, congratulations everyone. I will see all of our fifth years tonight for our celebratory dinner. I'd like the whole fifth year class to stand up so we can give them all a round of applause."
The 20 doctors in Annie's class, half of her original group stood to thundering applause from the staff gathered.
In Cloverdale Dan was having a heated argument with Leslie.
"Les I won't continue choosing one child over the other two," Dan shouted, "I finally got Annie back. Chris is actually talking to me. I'm getting to know Josh and Ellie. Why would I undo that?"
"For me," shouted Leslie, "I'm prisoner to her as much as you are.
Dan yelled, "Then stand up. Leslie, she's 26 maybe Jessica needs to figure her own shit out without you doing it for her. Let her struggle and fail. Maybe we coddled her too much. The other two have had to falter and fail and pick themselves up."
"Like you let Annie and Chris falter," Leslie challenged, "like you let the Hunts shelter and support them?"
"I've also been talking to Owen. He's a good guy," Dan said, "yes they've been emotional support for Annie and Chris. We should be fucking thankful they were there for both. They chose to be there for both. She didn't have to embrace Annie but she did; they chose to care for Chris. I'm going down there tomorrow and staying with Owen and Teddy. I'm spending the weekend with my daughter and granddaughter. Annie still refuses to call me dad until I earn it back but she is talking to me. They had their last day of residency today. Ellie went with them."
"So you're just going to let them manipulate you two," Leslie yelled, "your my husband."
"Leslie I haven't been happy for ten years. We haven't been happy you've been consumed by placating Jessica," Dan stated, "we can't continue like this. I want to be happy."
"We can't work this out," Leslie whined.
"Not until you put your foot down with Jessica," Dan said, "she needs to be out of the house and to work her own life out."
"Will that bring Annie back," Leslie asked.
"Annie will never return to BC if that's what you're asking," Dan said, "she may eventually agree to visit but she's built her life in Seattle. They're buying that house. It's 100 years old and she wants to slowly bring it back to what it was when it was built, it's a craftsman era people have covered up."
"They want to restore it," Leslie asked.
"They have a plan to do it slowly," Dan said, "they want to do it themselves. I've said I'd help."
"Why do you care," Leslie asked, "she replaced us."
"She didn't," Dan said, "she wanted both. We allowed Jessica to shut Annie out."
"What lies have they told you," Leslie demanded.
"We knew when Annie went to Harvard we'd have to work hard to hold onto her," Dan said, "we didn't. We knew ten years ago when she got beaten half to death that Teddy wasn't going anywhere. I wasn't sure about Owen but he was with them. He was there as much for Annie as for Teddy. When Annie started med school they made sure we came for her thanksgiving break and brought Jessica. Annie wasn't feeling safe with Jessica so chose to stay in Seattle. They invited us to stay with them and made sure we were part of the family. Gave Annie the support we couldn't."
"She married a man we know nothing about. A man who didn't even have the balls to ask for our blessing," Leslie yelled.
"He did get Teddy and Owens' blessing," Dan said, "Josh didn't meet us until February. Why would he ask us. The only parent he knew for Annie for years was Teddy."
"Why would he only know Teddy," Leslie asked.
"Because Teddy would go see Annie in Boston. They didn't know until their third year of med school how closely linked their families were," Dan said, "Annie had more of an idea then Josh. I don't think there's anything Annie and Teddy don't talk about. Nathan told me that story when I was down a couple weeks ago."
"She tells me nothing," Leslie complained, "she wouldn't even ask me about the baby or her pregnancy. She went to Teddy."
"Annie was 25 when Teddy had Allison," Dan said, "she would remember that. And Annie doesn't trust you. What have you done to earn Annie's trust? Have you even called her and asked about Ellie? Have you asked to see Ellie?"
"Annie can reach out to me," Leslie said, "she's the one that chose to go that chose a new name that gave up on our family. For what?"
"Annie never gave up on us," Dan said, "we gave up on her. We stopped trying to keep the peace with Jessica. Leslie that was wrong. All of them kept trying with us. Teddy called and emailed, Owen called me we were the ones that didn't answer. We're close to losing Chris and you don't see it. Did you hear anything doctor Shepard told us? That Jessica's tumor was only part of the problem. You refused psych consults for Jessica. They offered all that support I was prepared to take and you refused. They offered us counselling for Jessica, for you and I and family counselling you said no. i had Jessica ready to participate, Annie and Josh were on board you said no."
"What were their real motives," Leslie questioned.
"I'm going to take Teddy at her word," Dan said, " it was a chance to heal not only Jessica physically but our family. She wanted to give us a chance. And there's no way she did that without talking to Annie about it first or Owen agreeing."
"What about Josh? We know nothing about him," Leslie said.
"You know nothing about him," Dan said.
"What do you know that I don't," Leslie asked.
"Lots now," Dan said, "facetime them everyday for three weeks and you learn a lot."
"She's not our Annie, she's Teddy's Annie now," Leslie said.
"I think Annie is her own person," Dan said, "she found her voice. She makes her own decisions or her and Josh decide on things as a couple."
"She had a baby before we met her husband," Leslie ranted.
"We met Josh before Ellie was born," Dan said, "they were married a year before she got pregnant. She told me it was planned. They wanted a baby. Although my mom said Annie was miserable for the first half and really sick."
"Why would your mom know," Leslie continued ranting.
"Because they told my mom about the baby at Annie's birthday dinner," Dan said, "Annie talks to her or texts daily. She asks my mom about babies and taking care of Ellie. Annie goes to my mom for advice. She had my mom and Teddy. My mom is her sympathetic ear. Teddy wants to solve the problem, my mom just lets Annie talk."
"You need to choose Dan," Leslie snapped, "our marriage or the kids."
"Our marriage was over years ago," Dan replied, "when you stopped letting me have a voice. It was over ten years ago when you stopped listening. I'm done Leslie. I'm going to be free and happy."
Dan walked out of the house.
"Dan, where are you going," Leslie shouted.
"My parents for now," Dan said, "I'm in Seattle this weekend. There's a dirt bike race Saturday night Bill and I are going to but I'm spending tomorrow night at Teddy and Owen's we're celebrating Annie and Josh finishing their residency and passing their board exams."
"Do what you want," Leslie shouted slamming the door.