violence, implied alcoholism, abuse and self harm trigger warnings.
Alex was actually able to find Haruhi the next morning on the way to school, now that she knew who to look for. The walk to class was a far more enjoyable one for Alex, as Haruhi pointed out little landmarks for Alex to remember her way around. Not that Haruhi hadn't gotten stares walking to class before, they did stand out from the rest of the student body, but the stares were different now that Haruhi was walking around with Alex. People didn't seem to be scared or patronizing, but impressed or jealous. Haruhi enjoyed the change.
"I told my dad about you, Alex." Haruhi hummed. "I don't really like to tell him much or he'll worry, but like you said before. It's good to have each other, and I'm sure him knowing I have at least one friend will put him at ease for a while."
The thought of Haruhi telling her dad she made a new friend at school today made Alex chuckle. "Aw, Haruhi. That's very sweet." They entered the class together and sat down near the back.
Haruhi face began to turn red. "Do you maybe want to come to dinner at my house sometime? My dad wants hot pot, but I know it'll be much too much for just the two of us-"
"You've got quite the nerve, Commoner!" Hikaru popped up behind Haruhi. "Inviting a celebrity over to your house for dinner? Aren't you embarrassed?"
Haruhi's face furrowed in frustration. "Why should I be? Alex lives near me, and she's not some judgmental rich person like you two."
Kaoru tsked. "Touchy-touchy, Haruhi! You should invite us too! It'd be like a safari into poor-man's land!"
"I'd rather die!"
Alex stiffled a laugh and joined in. "You might if they ever learn your address, I wouldn't trust them as far as I can throw 'em!"
The four took shots at each other until class started and the twins were told to go to their seats. Alex felt at ease that she might have herself a little group of friends in her class. She forgot things couldn't be bad all the time.
Class 1-A had an easy kind of day once again, students were complemented on every answer, especially the wrong ones, though after a spiel on how it was a good effort the teacher would eventually correct the student. Alex still couldn't wrap her head around this teaching method, but somehow Haruhi managed to scrawl every one of the teachers words onto their notes. Alex's page was still blank. At the end of the day the four walked together to music room 3, which confused Alex.
"Wait Haruhi, what are you headed to the host club for?"
Haruhi looked nervously to the twins and was about to answer but Kaoru spoke up.
"Well-"
"Haruhi's our newest member! We're letting him intern for a while."
"Right!" Hikaru joined in. "Haruhi here needs as much help impressing girls as we can get. Like Kyoya-senpai said before, we're providing a public service!"
"The public service of teaching Haruhi how to be irresistible to women?" Alex questioned in disbelief.
Kaoru bent at the waist to speak in Alex's ear. "You think we're irresistible?"
Alex shoved him halfway off the sidewalk and the twins teased her the rest of the way to the club.
The room was much less empty than it had been before. Similar sets of expensive looking seating areas were placed around the room past a reception area where girls were already waiting. Kyoya greeted Alex with another patented business smile.
"Ms. Sterling, so good to see you again. Thanks for coming, I do apologize but if you could allow me to get the guests set up and then I'll be able to walk you around and get a better feel for our club activities."
"Yeah, no problem."
Haruhi and Alex sat in wait watching Kyoya disperse their guests to their proper seating areas. Alex huddled close to Haruhi.
"You didn't come here to meet with any of them did you? I don't believe a word the twins said." She whispered.
"No, nothing like that." Haruhi whispered back. "I stumbled in here to study and…" Haruhi looked up when they noticed Kyoya watching them. He put a finger to his lips and smiled. "... I decided to join the club." Tamaki broke out into roarous laughter that Alex and Haruhi could hear from across the room. "It was mostly to get Tamaki-senpai to shut up."
That made Alex laugh out loud. "That's valid."
At that point Kyoya had made his way back to the two, with a shopping list. He handed it out for Haruhi to take. "Haruhi, if you wouldn't mind? Our supply stocks were lower than anticipated." Haruhi rolled her eyes and took the list before leaving the club room. "Now Ms. Sterling-"
"You know, you can just call me Alex. I'm just Alex." She let out a big breath. "You don't ever have to use my last name."
Kyoya's mouth hung open, forced to pause his well-rehearsed tour. "Alex... let me introduce you to our daily club activities."
They strolled around the room watching the routines of the hosts. Alex snuck a treat off of Honey's tray and began to nibble on it until they stepped past the twin's tables when the food fell out of her open mouth. Kyoya smirked at her surprise.
"Are you a fan of brotherly love? I'd be more than happy to include a discounted rate for them in your contract"
"Please don't. I get enough of them in class." She laughed to herself. "So what's your routine? What did you say your type was again?"
"The ladies like to call me the cool type, but I don't see any guests myself. I mostly manage the club."
"So you're the club president, then. I wouldn't have pegged you for the type to make money off of others looks…"
Kyoya huffed in amusement. "The others would disagree with you, but no. I'm actually the vice president. Tamaki is the real president. He came up with the club as a way to bring us all together, so that we might make others happy."
"Oh." Alex watched Tamaki spin and dip a guest while she giggled and blushed uncontrollably. "Well that's actually kind of sweet. I was starting to think you all just liked being fawned over."
"I'll be honest, I don't think that's completely false," Kyoya chuckled. "But it's nice of you to think so."
"So what would you have me do at the club anyways? You aren't starting a hostess division are you?"
"Not at the moment no, and I think if we did the school might not allow us to continue… but like I said before. I'd like to manage an idol career for you, here. We might hold the occasional performance for you during or after club hours, sell merchandise and hold meet-and-greets for you and the other hosts. And we can promote each other." Kyoya looked Alex up and down and studied her face intently, sizing her up. In his eyes it looked like he was determining what exactly to say to make her say yes. Alex crossed her arms in protest. "A club full of well established family heirs supporting you might not be the worst thing, Alex."
"Well I'm sorry but I am tragically inept at dancing. If you make me do anything like that on stage I'll probably just fall off."
Kyoya suppressed a grin. "Give me a little credit, Alex. I know you like to play your instruments when you perform, I wouldn't make you go too out-of-depth."
"Alright, alright. That doesn't sound too bad."
"That's wonderful to hear." Kyoya began to turn in towards what looked to be the back office. "I'll begin to draft a contract. You're welcome to tea and snacks if you'd like to stay and request a host. I'll even give you your second visit free."
"Second visit? Who was my first?"
Kyoya turned back around and gave her a wry smile. "The cool type, of course."
When Alex was about to leave for school the next morning, a cute brunette boy stood in the Ouran uniform outside her door. After Alex opened the door to ask them what they wanted the boy turned around to reveal Haruhi, who span around to show off her new look.
"What do you think?"
Without the glasses, Alex could see right into Haruhi's gigantic eyes. "Wow Haruhi! You look hot!" Alex checked Haruhi out while she blushed. "What's with the boy's uniform?"
"They think I'm a guy, and when they took off my glasses they thought with a makeover I could make it as a host. You know I wouldn't say no to a free haircut and uniform, so I just let them."
"Of course, you were stunning before that, but you do look great!"
"Aw stop". Haruhi blushed and pushed on Alex's arm. "I think they're having me host my own guests today. I got a little practice yesterday, but now I guess some girls are visiting just for me. "
"You're gonna host? I might actually come in as a guest then!"
"I'll make sure to get you a discount for my services, but only if Kyoya-senpai never touches the money." They both laughed at their senpai's expense.
"Kyoya scares me! Working with the club sounds like fun but working with him? I'm spooked. He's just so intimidating, he looks at everyone like he knows everything about them, I get the feeling he can read my mind. I wonder what kind of things he writes down in that black notebook of his."
"I don't".
The day went by far too quickly for both Alex and Haruhi, neither of them found themselves looking forward to club. The twins paid no mind however, taking advantage of their state to talk endlessly.
"Hey Alex, if you're gonna be the club's idol, we'd be more than happy to dress you." Hikaru teased.
"Our mother's a famous fashion designer, y'know." Kaoru seemingly began to start taking Alex's measurements. "Taught us everything we know."
When Kaoru began trying to measure Alex's bust she slapped his hand away. "Woah hold it! She couldn't have taught you much!"
"Come on, Alex." Hikaru chided her. "You know you'll need to be specially fitted for that area, not every girl is so well endowed." He glanced to the side at Haruhi who glared back over the brim of a textbook.
"And who better for the job than people who can really appreciate them!" Kaoru reached for them again, but stopped once Alex crossed her arms.
"I would say the same for you two but I don't think there's much to measure or appreciate!"
"Aw Alex," Hikaru took hold of Alex's face to bring her closer, squeezing her cheeks together. "If you wanted to see us naked you could have just said so! You know you're always welcome in our bed."
"That's enough, you two." Haruhi stood between Alex and the twins.
"What, Haruhi, jealous?" Hikaru grinned. "You can join too, though we might need a bigger bed."
Kaoru muttered. "We won't actually though, Hikaru."
Alex and Haruhi giggled.
"Kaoru! Don't ruin the joke!"
During the last period of class, after the twins had been beckoned by prospective guests, Haruhi laid her head on the desk and moaned to Alex. "I don't wanna go to club today."
"Why not? What's wrong?"
"I'm just sick of having to stay around these rich people for extra time. Some of them are really really stuck up and rude as hell about it. Yesterday they made a big deal out of trying the exotic 'commoners coffee' when they sent me out to buy it without giving me any money for it, like what was I supposed to do?"
"That's so rude!"
"And there was this one girl who's like always with Tamaki-senpai who said she didn't even think they could 'stomach that crap', like, no one's forcing you to drink anything, princess! I just… would rather not have to see her again."
Alex reached over and pressed on Haruhi's nose. "Aw, Haruhi. I'll beat up anyone you need me to, or maybe sic my little army on them." Alex motioned to the group of boys watching them that shyly turned away at the recognition. The twins started heading back to them and Alex tilted her head in consideration. "-I might just beat up the twins for the fuck of it."
They smiled knowingly at each other and sat up from their seats as the bell rang. They were walking down the hallway towards the host room, but Haruhi remembered she didn't have her book bag. She was about to head back to the classroom to get it when she noticed familiar-looking debris floating around in the reflecting pool. She sighed in dismay but perked back up when Alex turned back for her.
"You okay, Haruhi?"
"Yeah, I just left my bookbag in the classroom. You guys go ahead without me."
"You sure?" Alex pressed a comforting hand to Haruhi's arm.
"Yeah, it's all good."
When Alex and the twins made it into the club room, Kyoya once again greeted Alex warmly while the twins left to set up their area.
"Welcome back, Alex. I apologize once again but I am waiting on a call from my family's lawyers to finalize the contract. If you'd like I can set you up with a host, free of charge as I said before. The lawyers shouldn't take very long."
"That's perfect!" Alex perked up. "Haruhi just became a host, right? Can I request him?"
"My apologies once again. Haruhi's already been booked for today by Princess Ayanokouji. I would be more than happy to set you up with any other of our hosts today."
Alex looked around at the rest of them. She thought she might gag at having to be around the twins while they simultaneously flirted with the guests and each other. Her eyes landed on Tamaki. He was very handsome, he was the angelic boy from before after all, but she was still uncomfortable at the thought of paying someone she found attractive to flirt with her in such an exaggerated way as Tamaki did. Alex's eyes settled on Honey and Mori. She doubted their flirting styles were so over-the-top as the others, since Honey was a child. In fact their act seemed to consist of Honey doing cute things and climbing Mori like a jungle gym, so it couldn't be too bad. It would just be like hanging out with Alex's younger and older brothers.
"Can I hang out with Honey and Mori?"
"Not a problem. I wouldn't have pegged you for the boy-lolita type, Alex."
"Oh yeah," She wrinkled her nose. "I just love me some eight year old boys. What's Honey doing in a highschool uniform anyways? Is he a boy-genius or something?"
Kyoya smiled to hide a chuckle at Alex's expense."He's actually a senior, and older than Mori-senpai."
"I-" Alex's words were caught in her throat. She watched Honey pretend to feed some cake to his stuffed bunny, then he waved at Alex.
"Hey Ale-chan! Want some cake?"
Alex side eyed Kyoya. "Are you sure?"
Kyoya huffed a laugh in response. "Yes, I'm sure. I have detailed profiles on all of the hosts, including you and Haruhi." He clicked his pen and his glasses flashed. "How do you two know each other again?"
"Kyoya, stop it or you're going to scare her off." Tamaki appeared between the two with a gentle hand on Alex's shoulder. He shook off a few droplets of water from his hair. "I need to speak with Alex, you've been hogging her the last few days." Alex did her best to keep calm but she could feel her stomach fill with butterflies.
Alex plastered a pleasant smile to her face to keep composed. "What's up, King?"
"King? Don't make me blush, Alex. That's my job," Tamaki teased. "I just wanted to say I'm really glad you're joining the club. I enjoyed playing with you the other night, but I had some questions."
"Like what?"
"How on earth did you learn that song? My mother taught it to me so long ago, I thought it was hers, I was worried I would never learn the full tune. I've never been able to find any sheet music..."
"Well," Alex paused. "My father wrote it, actually."
"Your father?" Tamaki's head tilted in confusion. Alex thought back to when she first heard the song.
My father...
She was much younger, barely more than a toddler, holding her mother's hand while her father hunched over a piano at a fancy party. Her mother eventually joined him on the piano bench, playing the second part. They were somewhere in Europe, all Alex remembered was that their words were funny sounding. When her father finished his song a beautiful lady with pale blonde hair rushed to him to thank him and shake his hand before a taller man with darker blond hair joined the woman. Back at their hotel room, Alex was excited, jumping on the bed while her mother slept in an armchair off to the side. Her dad usually came home from his performing very happy, and it was Alex's favorite occasions, more than Christmases or birthdays when her dad seemed to be angry and argue with her mom.
But it was late, Alex was yawning and cartoons had long since stopped playing on the hotel's TV. Outside the window, Alex thought she could see the sky turning orange past the giant metal triangle tower in the distance. Her little body jumped when she heard the hotel room door slam shut.
"Alexandria! What are you doing up?" Her dad's words were loud and abrasive, all slurred together like he was tired again, or at least that's what mom always called it. "Laurel! Laurel wake up!" Her father dashed over to her sleeping mother and pulled her up by the wrist. "Why's our daughter still awake? Can't you do anything right?"
"Jonathan you're hurting me," She begged in a hushed tone. "Please,"
"You're hurting me! How am I supposed to perform well if I can't be sure my daughter is being taken care of!" He threw her to the bed. "You're a mess Laurel! What are you falling asleep for? What got you tired? Watching me make money for us?"
"Daddy stop yelling!"
He stopped in his tracks, looking ashamed. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Daddy will quiet down now, so you can go to sleep." He moved gently towards Alex's bed and slipped her covers over her body. Alex flinched when he bent to kiss her forehead and his eyes lowered. "I'm sorry, Alex. You can go to sleep now,"
"Alex?" Tamaki's concerned expression knocked Alex out of her flashback. When she came to she was sat on a sofa and the girls were being fairied to their seating areas, including towards her and Tamaki.
"Are you alright Alex?"
Her pleasant smile presented back on her face. "I'm fine, sorry about that."
"No, Alex. Don't you worry about a thing. You said your father wrote the song?"
"Yeah, Jonathan Sterling, 'Lover's Ballad',"
"Your father is Jonathan Sterling? The man's a legend, how could I not have known you were his daughter!"
Alex looked up to see that the guests had nearly descended upon them. "I think you'd better get to your guests now,"
"Please, I'm sure they could wait a few minutes,"
"I'm sure we'll have plenty of time to talk later, thanks Tamaki."
"Are we that close already?" Tamaki tilted his head with a wry smile. "Not many people call me that without the honorific."
"Oh I'm sorry!" Alex covered the bottom half of her face with her hands, remembering the insinuation of not using honorifics. "That's the one thing I struggle with in japanese, I didn't mean anything by it!"
Tamaki laughed, relishing the chance to tease her. "It's fine Alex. You can call me whatever you'd like."
Alex had to leave Tamaki quickly to hide her bright red face from him. She stood alone between the tables, arms crossed and looking for Haruhi so she could calm herself down. She saw Haruhi sitting and fidgeting at a small table across from a girl with dark red hair and-
A scream ripped through the air.
"No, Haruhi! Leave me alone!"
Alex saw a flash of blue and yellow and mad-dashed to where she saw Haruhi pinning the bully from PE.
"Somebody help! He just attacked me!" The girl looked up at Haruhi in fake panic. "Somebody teach this commoner a lesson!"
The twins made it to Haruhi and the girl before Alex and dumped water on the both of them.
Alex bumped them both out of the way to help Haruhi up. "Are you okay Haruhi? What happened?"
"What does it look like, you slime? Of course you two commoners know each other!" The girl spat at them.
"It's better than being a bitchy coward like yourself!" Alex seethed back. Alex tried to stomp forward at the girl but Haruhi grabbed ahold of both of Alex's arms to hold her back. "At least Haruhi and I deserve what we've been given! And us commoners don't even have to pay for Tamaki to pay attention to us-"
Ayanokouji dove at Alex, wrapping both soft, never-worked-a-day-in-her-life hands around Alex's throat. The force knocked all three of them onto another table. Haruhi fell away and sat on the floor dumbfounded. The twins, Honey and Mori began moving the guests out of the club room.
Alex gasped for breath and grasped for anything on the table that she could grab ahold of. Got it. She held onto a teapot and tried to hit Ayanokouji on the head with it but Alex missed and it shattered on Ayanokoujb's back. The two wrestled for dominance and tumbled onto another table, crashing to the floor with the rest of the expensive china. "Let... Go of me!" Alex's strained voice let out.
"I wish," Ayanokouji started. "The two of you…" She pounded wildly wherever her fist could reach of Alex. "Would just die!"
Alex blacked out. The next thing she remembered was looking up at Tamaki, cradling her hands and unwrapping them from a vase she was holding high above her own head. Alex looked down at the girl, pinned to the floor from Alex sitting on top of her. Tamaki set down the vase and helped her up before helping Ayanokouji to stand, too. Haruhi lead Alex, still in a daze, into the back room to change.
Kyoya stepped forward alongside Tamaki.
Ayanokouji stepped forwards, fists at her sides. "Kyoya! I want your police force on their way to arrest her now!" Kyoya's mouth twitched into a scowl. "Wipe that look off your face! I'm the victim, here! They never should have been here in the first place!"
"No," Kyoya stated plainly.
"Excuse me, Ootori?"
"I said no, Miss Ayanokouji. It appears not only are you impaired in the brain but the ears as well! Look what you've done to our club room, to our hosts and our guests!"
The twins stepped in circles around her. "We could tell a little before-" Hikaru started.
"But we can really see it now. I mean she was jealous of not one-"
"But two commoners!" Hikaru finished and they stood together in front of her, glaring and speaking together now. "That's really sad, isn't it?"
"I thought you were a nice girl, Aya-chan! What happened?" Honey piped up.
Ayanokoji looked at the hosts with a flustered expression. "B-but I am a nice girl! It's all their fault! I didn't do anything!" She looked down at Honey, then to Tamaki. "You- you believe me, don't you?"
"Miss Ayanokouji," Tamaki turned somberly to the girl. "I think you should leave."
"Tamaki!" She pleaded. "Please, she and Haruhi attacked me! Punish those commoners!"
Tamaki's glazed over her, indifferent. "You threw Haruhi's bag into the pool, didn't you? And Honey-senpai tells me Alex was thrown out of the locker room half-naked, that was you too, wasn't it Princess?"
The girls lips began to tremble. "But...but,"
"Leave."
"Tamaki, you idiot!" Tamaki watched her leave before following the hosts into the back room.
"Sorry about the uniform, Haruhi. It's the only spare we have." Kyoya noted loud enough for Haruhi and Alex to hear in their shared dressing room.
"It's fine, thanks Kyoya-senpai!"
"Haruhi!" Tamaki shouted in surprise. "What are you doing sharing a dressing room with Alex?" He ripped open the curtain to see Alex, in her underthings but wrapped in towels, having her wounds tended to by Haruhi, wearing only pants and a frilly undershirt.
Kyoya closed the curtain so the girls could finish dressing, leaving Tamaki dumbstuck and standing in wait.
"Haruhi," Alex muttered. "I'm really sorry about all of this."
Haruhi let out a huff of air and swiped medication on Alex's open wounds, mostly scratches and contact burns. "What are you apologizing for, defending me? I should be thanking you for that," pink dusted Haruhi's cheeks. Haruhi noticed scars running parallel across Alex's inner forearms and started tracing them with her finger. Alex flinched away.
Alex's shoulders began twitching up and down and she let out a sob into her bandaged hands, flinching from moving her bruised knuckles. "I've messed everything up, Haruhi. Everyone's going to think I'm some kind of freak, blacking out like that. You think that, don't you?"
"Of course not. I'm so grateful that you would defend me like that." Haruhi sat next to Alex on the bench and enveloped her in a tight hug, rubbing soft circles into Alex's back. "Shhh, shhh. She lashed out first, she has her own problems. I don't think anyone could see what happened and blame you."
Alex looked up at Haruhi who smiled sweetly and wiped a tear from Alex's cheek with her thumb. Alex's face started to heat up. "Haruhi," Alex smiled and wiped away more tears and snot with her arm, giggling. "You're getting too good at hosting."
The girls turned away from each other to change before stepping out in their uniforms.
"That's enough in there, Haruhi! Get out here!" Tamaki tapped his foot impatiently.
Haruhi threw open the curtain in one fell swoop and the hosts gawked at her. Alex resigned herself to stand next to Kyoya while the rest of the hosts teased Tamaki for not realizing Haruhi was a girl sooner.
"Alex, I suspect you know you can't be let off scot-free."
Alex refused to make eye contact with Kyota, just nodded silently.
"Don't worry yourself too much, just know that signing the contract is no longer optional. And you can forget about most of the allowance we were going to give you." Kyoya pushed his glasses higher up his nose. "We have to pay for the damages somehow."
"What do you think Ayanokouji-"
"I'll have it taken care of, Alex." Kyoya hesitantly placed a hand on her shoulder, pleased at the thought he might be able to set Alex at ease. "You're a part of the club now, and we take care of our own. And don't worry about the debt, Haruhi's in the same boat."
"Wait, what? Haruhi's indebted to you? What happened?"
"She knocked over an expensive vase we planned to auction off. Now, she has to be requested by 1000 guests and then her debt will be forgiven."
"I requested her earlier, that counted right?"
"Oh, I suspected you already knew so I didn't". Alex huffed in frustration and Kyoya's shoulders relaxed. He tried to meet her eyes. "Alex, will you be alright?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine."
Despite Haruhi's reassurance earlier, Alex couldn't help but blame herself for earlier. That was her learned response for such events. Alex managed to keep herself together until she got home, but when she did, she punched the concrete fence beside her apartment building.
They probably think I'm some crazy freak. I can't believe I let this happen. I'm so stupid. It's all my fault. It's all my fault.
Alex stumbled into her apartment, knuckles bleeding from the punch. She looked around her apartment through her burning, tear filled eyes. The rest of her things had finally been shipped and boxes littered the floor. She spotted a box cutter .
Not again. Please don't do this again.
Alex had reached a low point like this before, some depressive breakdown after losing herself in a manic episode before, where she managed to ruin her life in one fell swoop. Just like father.
Daddy's little girl is gonna do it again, won't you
I won't
Yes you will, you deserve it. You deserve all of this.
Please, stop it.
Do it,
Please