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The week progressed like molasses. I met with my agent on Tuesday and worked out with Jasper again. I was discouraged because I didn't feel like I was getting any better, but Jasper begged me for patience. I was able to admit to myself that my real impatience lay with a need to see Bella again next Monday. I couldn't stop thinking about her.
On Thursday, Jasper stilled my forearm mid routine. His palm was callused and rough and felt nothing like the soft electricity of Bella's. I sighed.
"C'mon, Edward, you've got to focus," he insisted. "You can't let yourself get down. Your mind is just as big a part of this rehab as your body." He paused to gaze at me for a minute. "Maybe you should see a sports psychologist. Surely, the GM could arrange that." I thought for a minute. He had a point; it wasn't the worst idea in the world.
"I'll consider it," I promised him, and we silently resumed the routine. I tried to have a better attitude and keep Bella out of my thoughts. We were finishing up when Alice let herself into the treatment room.
"Hey, Edward," she greeted. "I haven't seen you since last week. How are things going?" She leaned against the closed door, while Jasper started putting the equipment away. We had to keep the door closed, while I was here. Everything was going according to plan, and Whitlock was getting a lot more attention. Unfortunately for me, that meant lots of fans requesting autographs while I was here trying to get some work done. I had an interview with the reporter who wrote the Sports Blog for the Houston Chronicle tomorrow, and that would give Whitlock even more exposure. I smiled and nodded at Alice but didn't answer her. I didn't have any platitudes left right now. She seemed to get it and turned her attention back to Jasper.
"Jas, I can straighten up in here if you and Edward want to finish up in your office," she offered. He quickly agreed and escorted me out of the treatment area and back into his office. I knew he was done with clients for the day and needed to catch up on paperwork, but I wasn't in any hurry to get out of here. I sat in the chair opposite his desk and looked out the window. It reminded me of the day I'd stared out the same window trying to avoid staring at Bella.
"How is it really going with Bella?" Jasper asked, almost like he was reading my thoughts. I startled guiltily and looked back at him. He leaned back in his desk chair and propped his feet on the edge of his desk.
"It's going great," I promised. "She's very professional." Too professional, I thought to myself. I couldn't get a read on her, and I made a fool of myself every time we were together. Jasper watched me unblinkingly.
"Really?" he quirked and eyebrow. "Does she have anything to do with your attitude this week?" I scoffed incredulously.
"My Major League pitching career is on the line. I have a right to act like a dick, if I feel like it." Jasper chuckled as I'd meant him to do.
"It's just a little strange to have her so involved in our lives again, out of the blue," he mused. "After how she dropped you, and then Alice, so suddenly and completely all those years ago." And then I understood, he was worried about me, of course, but he was even more worried about Alice's feelings.
"So, has Alice been hanging out with her again?" I fished for any information about her. Jasper nodded and rocked in his chair.
"Yeah. She went out to lunch with her and one of her other doctor friends last weekend," he confirmed. So, Bella had doctor friends, I pondered but then scoffed internally. Of course, she had other friends. She hadn't been sitting at home alone for six years. Jasper kept talking, and I turned off my inner monologue in order to pay attention. I wanted all the info on Bella I could get. "I was worried about that, but Alice said she had fun." Jasper dropped his feet to the floor and shrugged. I leaned forward and put my elbows on the edge of the desk.
"What else did she say?" I asked. Jasper eyed me sharply.
"Nothing else. She's Switzerland, remember?" he told me with a hard glance. I'd betrayed my interest, and Jasper was on high alert. I hummed, trying to seem nonchalant.
"Edward, I need you to stay focused on your elbow. I can't have you getting all emo on me," he exclaimed.
"I thought you were committed to a collaboration. You promised you were going to be nicer to her," I retorted. I wasn't even pretending disinterest now, throwing caution to the wind. He looked at me incredulously.
"From what I understand, this girl is completely wrapped up in herself and her life plan," Jasper said. "She's only here now because it benefits her career to help out an injured superstar. She dropped you before when she thought it would hold her back. Tell me I'm wrong about this. I don't want her to take advantage of you when you're vulnerable." I groaned and rubbed my face with both palms. He looked confused by my action.
"Am I wrong? What am I missing?" he asked. That was the million dollar question indeed, and I needed to answer it. But I wasn't ready to give the full explanation. So, I settled for a small admission. I leaned back in my chair and made eye contact.
"Jasper, you and Alice have been there for me when I needed you, and I need you now. I appreciate all you've done more than I can say. But you don't know the whole story with Bella. What you just said was not fair." Jasper narrowed his eyes.
"Okay then, enlighten me," he demanded, laying down the challenge. I shook my head.
"Not today," I begged, "for now, just promise to give her chance." He looked skeptical but slowly nodded.
"All right, Edward, but I hope you know what you're doing," he said. I grinned with relief.
"I don't," I told him, "but I aim to find out." Monday could not come soon enough.
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Jasper and I had cleared the air, so I wasn't worried about our therapy session on Friday afternoon. I focused on the interview with the Chronicle reporter. We met at the stadium. My publicist, Renata, had arranged for us to sit in one of the luxury suites with a view of the field. They were pushing the hometown hero angle and trying to build some excitement and viewership if I were able to return to the mound…when I was able to return to the mound. I wasn't a huge fan of this kind of stuff, but the Astros were perpetually at the bottom of the division, unlike the Braves. It was a necessary adjustment. At least until I returned, and the led the team to the World Series, I promised myself. I exited the locker room where I'd been hiding out and found Renata and the reporter in the Media Room.
"Hi, I'm Heidi Bates," she chirped. I shook her hand. She was very tall with long blond hair. She wore what looked like a business suit designed for a nine year old. The pants stopped halfway down her calves, and the jacket barely buttoned over her chest. I wondered why she even bothered with the professional clothing. But blog authors could push the envelope, I guessed. I compared her appearance unfavorably with what I'd seen Bella wearing at Dr. Cullen's office.
"Nice to meet you, I'm Edward Masen," I told her politely. Her smile was a bit predatory. I wasn't sure if she was interested in me or the scoop. I probably would have been attracted to her a month ago, but today her hair was too light, she was too tall, and her figure too slim. Renata cleared her throat; she might need a raise.
"Let's head up to the box," she requested in a no nonsense tone. I motioned for Heidi to follow her, and I took up the rear as we walked. Heidi didn't like that and kept craning her neck to pepper me with small talk as we headed to the elevator.
The box had a spectacular view of the field, and even I was dazzled by it. I felt the adrenaline pumping at the thought of pitching from that mound, the culmination of my dreams. The excitement flagged quickly though as I remembered my elbow and that I might never get the chance. Heidi was eyeing me curiously as we sat next to each other in the stadium seats outside the box. I wondered what she saw on my face, and I rearranged the frown with what I hoped was a welcoming expression. Renata hovered in the background.
"So, Edward," she began, "talk to me about what it's like being back in your hometown." She was leaning towards me, peering up into my face. I felt uncomfortable and drew heavily on my years of media training in an attempt to stay civil.
"Well, it's wonderful, actually," I told her. The truth was obviously easiest here. "I'll be playing right in the spot where I first dreamed about it as a kid." I had to project a confidence I didn't really feel. "I'm Houston born and bred, and my family is here, so I'm thrilled to be back." She smiled too widely at me with her slick red lips.
"Let's talk about your family. You grew up as an only child in River Oaks and went to Bellaire High School, am I right?" she confirmed So far these were easy questions, it seemed like a puff piece. Renata must have really had a hand in this.
"That's right, Heidi," I turned on my best, charming smile. "I remember playing catch with my dad in Hermann Park and going to games with my parents at the Astrodome."
"Your dad is a really well-known surgeon," she continued. "Did you ever think about going into medicine? What did he think about a career in professional sports?"
"Well, my parents are very proud of everything I've accomplished. When you love baseball as much as I did as a kid and have the opportunity to pursue it as a career, it's really a no-brainer," I focused on maintaining eye contact. I vowed to make Renata proud of my effort. "My backup plan was actually music," I told her, and I said it conspiratorially, like I was confiding a secret. She was eating it up. "I was a music major at Rice until I left for the draft."
"Oh, I could see you as a rock star," she exclaimed and leaned in even further. I could smell her perfume, and although it wasn't awful, it made me think about Bella. I didn't think she wore perfume; she always had a clean, fresh scent about her. I couldn't help myself, I had to lean infinitesimally back away from her. She didn't notice.
"Actually, I focused on piano performance," I corrected, and she giggled.
"Oh, I bet the ladies loved that! I would love to hear you some time. Do you still play?" she queried. I thought about the piano in my new living room. Then I thought about the days Bella had studied in the practice room with me while I played back at Rice. It was getting harder to keep a happy face on. I confirmed that I did indeed still play and ignored her other comment. Unfortunately, she didn't let it drop.
"You obviously have a whole armamentarium of traits you can use to attract a partner," she told me. "I know the women of Houston want me to ask if there is a special someone for you." I wanted to roll my eyes so badly, but I doubled my efforts to pour on the charm.
"Oh, you know I'm not going to talk about that today, Heidi," I pretended to tease her. "Aren't we here to talk about baseball?" She ignored my attempt at a transition.
"Houston's gain is Atlanta's loss," she said. "I'm told you left an ex-fiancee behind there." I stiffened at the mention of Victoria. The last thing I wanted was stuff about her being written on the Chronicle's blog. What if Bella saw it and got the wrong impression? Luckily, Renata stepped in at that point. She redirected the questions away from my personal life and back to baseball and what I hoped to accomplish here in Houston. Heidi pouted prettily but got back in line. This girl was trouble. I was going to have to make it a point to stay away from her at media events. I was relieved when I was finally allowed to leave the two of them alone again.
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I woke Monday morning with a feeling in my gut like a cross between Christmas morning and the morning of a dreaded but important final exam. This was getting out of hand. I was trying to put off any overtures to Bella until after the rehab was done, but it was tying me in knots. Maybe I should just bite the bullet now and see how she reacted. I resolved to try and make some progress, however small, today.
I got to Whitlock way too early, and all the guys were still busy with previous clients. The ever cheerful Lucy was more than willing to keep me company, but a dude about my dad's age cornered me and peppered me with questions and a request for an autograph. He went so far as to ask for a selfie, and, of course, that was when Bella showed up. I dropped my eyes from hers and rubbed the back of my neck, feeling embarrassed that she caught me like that. I hoped she didn't think I was too full of myself. But she just smiled.
"Always making time for your fans, I see," she said. I decided to tease her. It felt right.
"Well, I had to do something to fill my time," I retorted, meeting her gaze again. I straightened up trying to project a playful confidence. "I thought a person was late if they weren't fifteen minutes early. Didn't you tell me that once?" I was worried it was too forward of a thing to say. It was a reference to our past, and I still wasn't sure if she wanted to remember. But she seemed relaxed when she answered.
"That I did," she agreed. "Touché. I guess we should get to work." I opened the door to the gym and ushered her inside. I was being as gallant as possible, and Lucy was watching. I wondered if it looked like we were flirting to her, because that's how it felt to me. I hoped I wasn't reading too much into it. We saw Garret almost immediately when we entered together, and he called out to us.
"You guys are in Room 3 again," he said motioning to the open door of the room we had used at the last session. We both waved back at him, and I was glad he was being cordial to Bella too. We entered the room and both smiled at each other as we took our respective places. She pulled out the therapy plan, even though we didn't really need it and got to work. After the banter we'd had in the reception area, I was feeling comfortable, and so the silence wasn't aggravating.
"Edward!" she exclaimed suddenly , and it startled me to such a degree that I stopped what I was doing immediately to give her my full attention. She laughed with an edge to her voice and apologized when she saw my reaction.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you, but I just thought of something," she told me self-consciously. It reminded me of when she'd realized I'd be playing with a designated hitter here in Houston. I wondered indulgently what she'd come up with this time. I went ahead and finished the last two reps on the exercise and gave her my best sexy smirk. No reason not to cash in on those.
"Well, don't keep me in suspense, Swan. You know I have no idea what goes on inside that brain of yours." I was trying to be cute, but her smile froze a little bit. Maybe that had been a little too much of a throwback comment.
"Sorry. I just wondered why we are doing this here. Surely, it would be more convenient for you to work out at Minute Maid? The facilities have to be state of the art, and you wouldn't have to worry about selfies in the waiting area," she rambled. I wondered if maybe I was making her nervous. The thought thrilled me. Then she spoke again and I knew she was rattled. "Where do you live, anyway?" she asked timidly. Elation made me bold. I laughed out loud in relief. She still felt something; I was sure of it.
"Damn, Bella, maybe you could benefit from some media training," I told her, thinking of my awkwardness with Heidi last week. She'd kind of sprung that on me. But I knew it wasn't planned with her. She just said what she thought
"To answer your first question, though, I insisted on meeting here in order to keep Jasper from putting himself out. This is a small firm, and he would have to cut appointments in order to come all the way down to the ballpark. I figured this was more convenient for you, too, since you're just coming from down the street. But, you're right, the facilities are just as good, if not better at Minute Maid." I dropped my eyes because I didn't want to spook her with my enthusiasm, but I only looked away for a short time. I was formulating an exciting plan, and I couldn't avert my gaze for long.
"Would you like to meet at the park next week? I could give you a tour afterwards," I offered. I could tell she wanted to say yes, but my girl was reticent.
"Edward, what is most convenient for you?" she insisted. After all this time, she was worried about putting me out. It wasn't right; I had a lot of work to do. I shook my head to clear my thoughts. "It is more convenient for me to meet at the park," I told her finally. "And to answer your second question, I live in one of those new high rises in walking distance of the park. And even though I have some commitments to the team, I tend to have a lot of free time on my hands right now." I said this last part wryly, trying not to let worries about my elbow contaminate this moment.
"Hey, we're going to get you better." She said this softly and caught my eye and held contact. I started to drown in those brown depths, and I nodded, unable to speak. Finally, I had to look away and pick back up the tension band to break the tension between us. Ha. We worked in silence for a while longer, and she spoke again.
"So…" she drew the word out, and I allowed myself to look at her again.
"Yeah, we should decide what we're going to do about next week," I agreed, glad we could get back to my idea. I was overly pleased with this plan. "I'd be proud to show you around the park. Have you still not been to a game there?" I hoped I wouldn't tread on a nerve by referencing her dad again.
"No, I have never been inside Minute Maid Park," she confirmed. I shook my head at such a travesty. "I know, I know," she agreed at my expression. "But I don't really have any friends interested in baseball, other than Emmett, and he's a Rangers fan." I mock gasped at this slight to the Astros, but I instantly honed in on the name Emmett.
"Who is Emmett?" I asked her. Her face crinkled adorably. She seemed confused by my question. "Emmett is my friend Rosalie's husband. He's a fellow at Baylor in a different subspecialty," she explained, and I nodded. Rosalie must be the doctor friend that Jasper had mentioned.
"And he's obviously deranged," I teased with mock gravity. She giggled, and it was the happiest sound. I mentally high-fived that I'd been able to amuse her. "So, Rosalie is the girl who had lunch with you and Alice last week," I tried to subtly fish for more information, but she looked worried.
"Relax, I don't know anything about the outing. Jasper just said that he was worried about Alice going out with you two, but he told me later that Alice had fun," I reassured her. I figured she was concerned that we were all talking about her behind her back, but she surprised me.
"I'm sorry I'm such a point of contention for you and Jasper. And Kate, too for that matter. By the way, I know she's with Garrett. I don't appreciate being ganged up on," she sounded playful and adopted the mock seriousness I'd used before. Of course, she figured it out. I wanted to reassure her that there would be no more shenanigans.
"I told her that was a really stupid thing to do. I'm sorry I teased you about it at your apartment, and I should have stopped her when she was yelling at you. She doesn't have all the facts," I told her guiltily. She just started at me, and I felt like I needed to say more.
"You're not a point of contention. Jasper just worries about me. I haven't always handled the fame and attention well. Kate was there when things were…well, not so good. Now that we are…I'll talk to them, I promise." I tried to explain, but I sounded evasive to my ears. I needed to stop while I was ahead, but I kept going. "You can see how this could be awkward or uncomfortable," I trailed off, gesturing between the two of us. All playfulness was gone, and she nodded silently, her eyes locked with mine.
"So, I don't want to get in the way if you Alice want to rekindle your friendship. I always felt bad that you guys drifted apart." I rambled, but I wanted her to know I really meant this. Even if nothing happened between us, I needed her to feel comfortable around me. "I can deal with Jasper and Kate. There will be no more ganging up." I smiled at her, hoping to convey confidence and bring some light back into her solemn face. I was rewarded when she let out what seemed to be a relieved sigh.
."Thanks," she said. "I'm hoping to spend more time with Alice. I've missed her." She gazed at me intently, and I imagined she meant she missed me too. But I was sure that was wishful thinking. I cleared my throat, because once again, I'd let things go too far, and I needed to get out of here before I made a fool of myself.
"So, we're on for next Monday at Minute Maid, then. It's high time that you got a look inside the place. I'll make sure you get tickets to a Rangers game this season. You can go with Emmett and Rosalie. And whoever else you'd like to bring," I added, although I hoped she'd be alone, watching me.
"Thanks for showing me around. We'll talk about the tickets later. I'm a Houstonian, first, remember?" I smiled at her old joke, and our eyes met. Her brown eyes were warm, and I wanted to drown in their depths. I held contact too long though and had to jerk my gaze away lest I make her uncomfortable.
"So next Monday at Minute Maid Park?" she asked. I thought she might sound a little rattled. Could I possibly be having the same effect on her that she was having on me?
"Yeah," I answered slowly, trying to reason through the logistics. "I believe it will work best if you just ride with me. Dealing with security can be tricky. I'll pick you up from Baylor, and we can drive straight to the park," I offered. And it would give me more time with her. "Sure, that sounds great," she agreed. "My finish time isn't set, you know?" she reminded me, but I just shrugged. Did she not realize that I would literally wait for her forever?
"Just text me, and I'll be there in about twenty minutes," I tried to sound casual.
"As long as it's not too inconvenient for you to come and get me," she said, still worried about putting me out. Did she really not want to come? I tried to make a joke.
"Bella, you're going to give me a complex. You know I don't handle rejection well," I said lightly, but she sucked in a breath and started at me wide-eyed. Obviously, she didn't think it was funny. I couldn't believe I'd been idiot enough to reference that day. I wanted to smack my forehead. I'd made things awkward again.
"Sorry," I muttered. "Some things just aren't joke material." I watched her anxiously, but she just nodded and seemed to let it go, to my great relief.
"So, I'll text you on Monday," she said. I nodded in agreement, wishing I could take back the last five minutes. Things would stay weird between us until we finally talked everything through. I knew it needed to happen, but the right timing still eluded me. All I knew was that I wanted to see her again, and Monday couldn't come again soon enough. I hoped the smiles ad banter would make a reappearance.
"I'll look forward to it," I told her very honestly. We started to walk out together. I pictured turning to her, grabbing her arm, insisting that we confront our past then and and there. But instead, I just got in my car and drove away, too much of a coward to look back at her. So much for progress.
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Thanks to everyone who has been so kind in reviewing. I haven't done this kind of thing in quite a while, so I'm sure there are a lot of mistakes. Like someone pointed out that in Chapter 25, Edward has a Porsche instead of a Corvette! What a dumb mistake on my part, since that car is based on my father-in-law's fancy Corvette. He is a former Blue Angel, and only tolerates the best of America lol. He definitely would never own a Porsche!
Also, several people have indicated how excited they are to see an update on this story after so long. Which older fic would be your first choice for a sudden and unexpected update. My choice is: Quarterback Sneak by jayhawkbb.
And did In the Land of Milk and Honey get published? I saw something on GoodReads that looked like it. Back in 2009 that was my big obsession. I printed it out from and had it bound so I could read it on the plane while flying to Thailand. It looks like based on the reviews on GoodReads that if is, I should not bother…