"Are you sure that this is gonna be a good thing?" I asked, while I was putting my books in the rucksack "Isn't it too soon?"
"No, believe me, we'll have a lot of fun..." insisted Jessie
"But I don't think I'm ready" I replied "And this could seriously affect our love story..."
Jessie put her hands on her hips: "Why are you so afraid of my parents?"
"I'm not afraid of them" I precised, standing up to going out of the class "I'm afraid of myself"
"What are you saying?" demanded Jessie, following me
"I could say something wrong, or sneeze in your mother's face, Jackson could inadvertently stumble because of me..." I said "Shall I continue?"
"You're exaggerating" commented Jessie "You're not so bumbling..."
"Yes, but meeting unknown people make me nervous" I explained "And when I'm nervous, the risk that I make stupid things is higher..."
"Don't worry, honey" declared my girlfriend "My parents are really kind, they won't judge you..."
"I hope so" I commented "Would it be on Saturday evening, huh?"
"Yes" confirmed Jessie "They're waiting for you"
"Oh, well, I'm really calm after this sentence..." I smiled, sarcastically
"Stupid..." Jessie smiled, too, then she kissed my on the cheek "See you after your soccer training..."
When I arrived in front of South Park Elementary, the whole team was already there, but their faces were not happy as they usually were: "Hey, what are those long faces?" I asked
"It's gone..." sighed Butters "It's all gone..."
"What?" I asked again
"Our snowy vacation" whined Clyde
"I still don't understand" I declared
"At the beginning of the year, our teacher told us that the whole class would have gone to Aspen for five days in February" explained Stan "But after PC principal has come, the majority of the money that was set for the trip has been used to better equip the school gym"
"I'm sorry guys, but I also think this is a good way to use money..." I admitted
"He has equipped it with weights and other things that can only be used by him and the other teachers" precised Cartman "He did it because he's a freaking selfish guy"
"How much do you need?" I informed myself
"1500$" answered Kyle
I was really sad to see my team so demotivated, so I declared: "I don't have much money, but I promise that you're going to that place..."
"How?" mumbled Kenny
"Follow me in the locker room, we're gonna find a solution" I invited "We have still some time before the beginning of the training..."
The kids obeyed, and when they all sat on the benches, I took my notebook and opened it: "Ok, for the next fifteen minutes you can propose any kind of event that could make us earn money..."
My team looked at each other with puzzled faces: "Don't be afraid, everything will be at least took into consideration" I reassured
After some minutes of silence, Token proposed: "Fundraising?"
"Our target is not fighting against world hunger or something like that, they won't take us seriously" pointed out Stan "We need something that we could organize without any problem..."
"A party?" intervened Craig
"How many people with real money would join a party organized from kids?" asked Kyle
"A musical?" proposed Scott
"No, aaah" answered Tweek "It would be too stressful..."
"In my opinion this is a good idea, but I'd slightly modify it..." I explained "What about a concert in the park? People love music, and when kids sing they also love it more..."
"We could do it on Saturday evening" suggested Craig "There are pre-Thanksgiving stalls, so the park is gonna be packed with people!"
"Perfect!" I exclaimed: I also had a good excuse to avoid the dinner with Jessie's parents...
"Yes, but it is a public place" reminded Kyle "How could we force people to pay to listen to it?"
"Easy, satisfied or money back" I said "It will be like a bigger stall: people will pay 5$ to listen to the concert, and if they don't like the music, they will be refunded: I'm sure that we will earn enough money..."
"Nice idea" commented Token "But we have to make a big show, so it will be easier for us to attract people..."
"We're gonna need a presenter, clothes, panels..." I listed "The girls could decorate the panels..."
"The presenter could be Jimmy" suggested Clyde
"Who? The disabled kid with crutches?" I asked "Are you joking?"
"Believe me, coach" intervened Butters "He would be perfect, he's a great comedian!"
"Ok, but I wanna see him on stage before" I accepted "You must think about a song that you could sing and bring me the list tomorrow, then we'll think about the dress code..."
"Have we only one day?" asked Tweek "Aaah!"
"Don't worry, Tweek" I reassured "If you don't want to sing, it's not a problem, but you and your friends have to find as many kids that want to join as you can before the end of the next school day: then we're gonna meet us in front of the school to organize the rehearsals, ok?"
"Yes, coach!" exclaimed the whole team
"Great!" I smiled "And now let's go on the pitch, we are late..."
On the following afternoon, the kids were waiting for me at the entrance of South Park Elementary and I arrived with a bright smile on my face: just a few hours before, I had informed Jessie about the concert keeping the door open to any further meeting with her parents, and now I had some additional time to prepare myself.
I greeted everybody: "Hey, guys! Are you ready? Is there anybody new?"
"Yes" Stan was the first to answer "My girlfriend is in"
"Oh, hi Wendy" I saluted "I hope that this concert will be better than the last time we met..."
"Definitely" laughed Wendy, then she pointed to three other girls "I've also brought my friends Bebe, Red and Heidi"
"And we can also introduce Jimmy to you" added Token
"Hey, c-c-coach" greeted the kid "I'm r-r-really happy to present your s-s-show, and my f-f-friend Timmy wants to sing, too"
"Timmy!" shouted another kid from his wheelchair
"Fantastic!" I exclaimed "Have you the list of the songs?"
"Yeah, take that" said Kenny, giving me a paper
I read it, giving comments: "Kyle, I already knew you choice, but I have to ask you that again: are you sure? It's great, but really risky..."
"It's a manifesto of hip hop culture" smiled Kyle "This is the best choice I could make..."
I continued: "Tweek & Craig, Red & Bebe and Kenny & Scott, really ambitious..."
"It's perfect for us" declared Craig
"He's a great singer" added Scott
"We're gonna rock the park" exclaimed Bebe
"Then we have Wendy and Stan" I read again "Stan, are you sure that you wanna sing in Italian?"
"This is one of Wendy's favorite songs, I couldn't refuse" smiled the kid, holding his girlfriend's hand
"Clyde and Token have chosen two songs that are perfect for them" the kids smiled "While Butters and Cartman... I actually wouldn't say that..."
"I'm the best singer in the world" declared Cartman "I'm gonna stun you..."
"Oooook, concluding with Heidi and Timmy, we have a ballad and an... unpublished?" I asked
"It's a b-b-banger" affirmed Jimmy "People will love it"
"Ok, guys, I guess we have all the possible ingredients to make a great concert" I declared "Where could we practice?"
"I think my backgarden is free" intervened Cartman "And there is a lot of space"
"Ok, let's go" I approved
At that moment, my phone rang: "Hey, sweetie" I answered, while the girls made hearts with their hands
"Hey, G, good news!" exclaimed Jessie
"About what?" I asked
"My parents want to have an aperitif with us on Saturday afternoon, so you can coordinate the concert and also meet them" explained Jessie "Are you happy?"
The smile disappeared from my face: "Yes, honey, a lot" I lied
"Great, see you tomorrow and good luck!" greeted Jessie
"Bye" I closed the call and exclaimed "That really sucks, man!"
"What happened?" asked Kyle
"Couple duties, you wouldn't understand" I answered "But now stop talking about me: Cartman's house is waiting for us..."
The three days that preceded one of the most important evenings since I arrived in Colorado gave me a lot of food for thought: disability isn't a limit, since Jimmy was a great and funny presenter; Cartman and Lady GaGa were like Eminem and MGK, impossible to put together; Kenny had a great voice also with that parka that covers his mouth.
But most importantly, I wasn't ready to meet Jessie's parents, and I was constantly thinking about that while I was putting on my white shirt to go to that aperitif.
I was looking at myself in the mirror and fixing my hair, when Kyle entered the bathroom: "Hey!"
"Aaah!" I exclaimed, with a wince "You scared the shit out of me!"
"And I also transformed you in Tweek..." laughed the kid "How do you feel?"
"Not good" I admitted "I'm afraid of making a bad impression..."
"Dude, if you had one shot, or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted in one moment, would you capture it or just let it slip?" asked Kyle
"I see that you are ready for the show" I smiled "But how could this help me?"
"You have the opportunity to meet your girlfriend's parents, and you're letting it slip by trying to show yourself in a different way from you are" explained Kyle "Just be yourself, it would be enough"
I thought about it for a second and smiled again: "I'm 17 and a 9 year-old kid is more mature than me..."
"And you discover that just after two months and a half?" laughed Kyle "Go there and rip it"
"Thank you, Kyle" I thanked, stopping looking myself at the mirror and taking the car keys "See you later..."
While I drove to Jessie's house I was really calm and reassured by my host brother's words, but when my girlfriend opened the door with her parents, I admit that I came back to my original anxiety: "Good evening" I greeted
"Hey, G" saluted Jessie "These are my father Carlos and my mother Gloria"
"Come in, please" invited the woman, that was really similar to Jessie "We're so happy to meet you, our daughter has told us a lot about you..."
"Jackson, come here to say hello" called the man
The little kid arrived: "Hey, Jackson" I greeted "How are you?"
"Fine" answered Jessie's brother "And your friends?"
Jessie was puzzled: "Friends?"
"Yes, the ones that came last time..." answered Jackson
I thought I was officially dead: I was ready to go away and let my love story end, but Gloria exclaimed: "You were really kind to bring other kids to make them play with Jackson!"
"Huh?" I asked, but then I recovered "Oh, yes, it was exactly what happened..."
"Follow us in the kitchen, we have something to drink..." invited Carlos
To make it short, it was a really good afternoon: Jessie's parents were really discreet in their questions and were two intelligent people, so we talked for a long about a lot of topics.
At the end of the aperitif, Carlos declared: "Come with me, G, I wanna show you something..."
"You're lucky, G" commented Jessie "He doesn't show that to everybody..."
I was really curious so I took my glass and followed him into a little room, full of soccer shirts. Carlos opened a little wardrobe that contained a trunk: "This is my collection of autographs..."
I was stunned while I read all that great names: Zico, Sanchez, Maradona, and obviously Pelé: "But the most important one is on this stamp dedicated to Mexico 1986 World Cup" explained Carlos, taking a little square of paper "It was autographed by former FIFA president Joao Havelange, a unique piece..."
While he was talking, I had the impulse to sneeze, and I initially managed to contain myself, but then I burst and, when I opened my eyes, the stamp was not there anymore.
I was terrified and looked into my glass: the rarest piece of Carlos's collection was there.
At that moment, I really wanted to cry: "I'm really sorry, I didn't want to..."
"Don't talk anymore" stopped Carlos
I thought that was my death sentence, but then he continued: "It was a simple accident and that was just a copy, not the original one, I actually don't have it..."
I sighed and laughed, reassured: I was safe...
We returned in the kitchen and I looked my watch: I was terribly late: "Sorry, but I have to go now..." I said
"It was really a pleasure to meet you" said Gloria
"But next time put the hand on your mouth when you sneeze..." joked Carlos
"What?" asked Jessie
"Nothing" I reassured "Bye!"
"Oh, hallelujah!" exclaimed Cartman, already dressed up with a white wig and a grey dress, since the kids have decided to dress up like the singer they interpreted "Where the fuck were you?"
"It doesn't matter" I declared, putting the headphones on "Is the money collector already operative?"
"Yes" confirmed Kyle "The data will be visibile on your phone"
"Fantastic" I commented, sitting in front of the console "Jimmy, you can go on the stage, Stan and Wendy, you're the first ones: good luck, guys!"
The disabled kid walked on the stage and started: "Hello everybody, what a lovely audience!" there wasn't anybody yet, but he continued "This is South Park Elementary Concert, and remember: your money are needed for a good reason. Now we'll see Stan Marsh and Wendy Testaburger with their version of "The Prayer"..."
I put the music from the console, and the concert started with Wendy's voice.
I pray you'll be our eyes
And watch us where we go
And help us to be wise
In times when we don't know...
Some people were attracted by Wendy's great voice and I started to see some money on my online collector.
I must also admit that Stan sang pretty well in Italian, despite of his strong American accent, and the first exhibition brought us at least 20 people: "Nice, guys" I commented, while Jimmy introduced the second singer: Token and his "Hurricane", an hymn against discrimination.
Pistol shots ring out in the barroom night
Enter Patty Valentine from the upper hall
She sees a bartender in a pool of blood
Cries out my God, they killed them all...
That was the right period for antiracist songs (actually, every period is right for them), so the money ad the audience triplicated: "Great performance, Token" I complimented "Now let's see Heidi and 'When the party is over'..."
Don't you know I'm no good for you?
I've learned to lose you, can't afford to
Tore my shirt to stop you bleedin'
But nothin' ever stops you leavin'
I started to see some people leaving the concert: I knew that song is not for everyone since it's really slow, but some of the audience raised the torch of their mobile phones to accompany the girl, that seemed really touched and sang really well: "Ok, now Tweek and Craig" I said, then I looked at the two kids "Our profits are gonna increase a lot thanks to you..."
Craig: I want to break free
I want to break free
I want to break free from your lies
You're so self satisfied I don't need you
I've got to break free
Tweek: God knows, God knows I want to break free.
I've fallen in love
I've fallen in love for the first time
And this time I know it's for real
I've fallen in love, yeah
God knows, God knows I've fallen in love.
I was a little afraid, because Tweek is unpredictable, but luckily it was a great exhibition: the audience sang, danced and clapped their hands, and we reached 1200$ after their performance.
I gave them five: "You were stunning, guys! We're getting closer and closer..."
The following one were Bebe and Red, that played "I love it" completely togheter.
I got this feeling on the summer day when you were gone
I crashed my car into the bridge, I watched, I let it burn
I threw your shit into a bag and pushed it down the stairs
I crashed my car into the bridge
I DON'T CARE,
I LOVE IT, I DON'T CARE
Another banger and another involuntary dancing contest, that brought us other 150$: we were so close to our target, but then Cartman got up the stage, dressed up like Lady GaGa to sing one of her greatest hits...
I wanna hold 'em like they do in Texas, please
Fold 'em, let 'em hit me, raise it, baby, stay with me (I love it)
LoveGame intuition, play the cards with spades to start
And after he's been hooked, I'll play the one that's on his heart
Since the first "mum-mum-mum-mah" I saw the money counter going down: Cartman was not able to sing with intonation, the audience whistled and after his performance we only had 500$ in our pocket: "Goddamn it, fat ass!" exclaimed Kyle
"Why did he choose this song?" I asked "Had he already sang that?"
"Why did he choose to sing?" corrected Stan "And yes, he unfortunately did.."
"Let's put our hopes in Butters and 'Boom Boom Pow'" I sighed
I like that boom boom pow
Them chickens jockin' my style
They try to copy my swagger
I'm on that next shit now
I'm so three thousand and eight
You so two thousand and late
I got that boom boom boom
That future boom boom boom
Let me get it now
Boom boom boom (gotta get that)
Boom boom boom (gotta get that)
Boom boom boom (gotta get that)
Boom boom boom (gotta get that)
Boom boom boom (that)
Boom boom boom (that)
Boom boom boom
Boom boom boom
I'm on that supersonic boom
Y'all hear that spaceship z-
He was going pretty well and we were gaining a lot of money, but then he suddenly stopped, terrified by the audience: "Butters!" I called "You're going well, just continue"
Nothing to do: he ran away, leaving us with 350$: "Now we're gonna need a miracle" I warned, while Timmy's wheelchair got on the stage.
His song was only a series of shouts of his name, but it surprisingly went pretty well: "800$!?" I exclaimed "Wow!"
Then Bradley and Kenny splitted "Perfect Symphony" between themselves: Scott sang the English part, Kenny the Italian one (with his tenor voice).
Scott: I found a love for me
Oh darling, just dive right in and follow my lead
Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet
Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me
[…]
Kenny: Sei la mia donna
La forza delle onde del mare
Cogli i miei sogni, i miei segreti e molto di più
They went good and we gained another 100$: "Go, Clyde" I oredered "Make everybody cry!"
Clyde answered with a military gesture and got up the stage: "Hey, Mama" dedicated to his dead mother
I wanna scream so loud for you
'Cause I'm so proud of you
Let me tell you what I'm about to do
(Hey Mama)
I know I act a fool, but
I promise you I'm goin' back to school
I appreciate what you allowed for me
I just want you to be proud of me (Hey Mama)
He perfectly followed my indications: people raised their phones again and we got to 1200$: "Ok, dude" I told Kyle "We're in your hands: 300$ missing, so you must be perfect"
Kyle didm't answered: he was focused on the stage, while I was focused on praying that he didn't fail it like he did in the rehearsals...
His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgettin'
What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
He's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now
The clocks run out, times up, over, blaow
The whole cast was next to my console, and we sang with him, clapping our hands without looking at the money counter: it was like we had forgotten the reason why we were doing that, we were totally caught by the music, like the rest of the people that were there.
At the end of the song there was an incredible standing ovation, Jimmy and the kids went on the stage to salute the audience.
It waited for them to look at the counter: "Ok, let's go!" I touched the monitor and looked at the number "1600$!"
"YEEES!" exulted the cast "ASPEN, HERE WE COME!"
"Despite of Butters the chicken" commented Cartman
"Despite of your lack of talent" precised Kyle
"Stop it, guys!" I exclaimed "We got what we needed, and everybody played a great part: this is the most important thing!"
Everybody was reunited in a giant hug: we had saved the school vacation, and I had also saved my relationship...