I opened the door of my house with a radiant smile: "It's over, Kyle!" I exclaimed, throwing my rucksack away

The kid smiled back: "Yeah, it's finally over!"

It was the end of our last day of school: from that moment the Christmas break started.

Our happiness moment was interrupted by Sheila's voice: "I thought you both loved school..."

"Yeah" I confirmed "But some days of break are always good..."

"I totally agree" declared Kyle "We could do a lot of things: play video games, ride our sleigh, make dreidel spin..."

"But before doing all of these things I have to go to the mall" I reminded "I'm terribly late and have to find the perfect present for Jessie: maybe a piece of clothing, a purse or something like that..."

"If you want, I could come with you..." proposed Kyle

"From when are you interested in fashion for girls?" I asked

"I'm not" answered the kid "But I'm interested in the new chocolaterie that has just opened..."

"Now it's everything clearer" I laughed "By the way, you can come..."

"Great!" exclaimed Kyle "Let's go!"

We drove to South Park Mall, rapidly found the shop I needed and bought a nice black T-shirt with a with heart in the middle and a red little purse.

Then we waited in line, but our cashier seemed to take it pretty easy: "How long this queue is?" puffed Kyle

"I don't know" I sighed, looking at my watch "We're standing here from twenty minutes... It is probably Murphy's law: the slowest employee is always the one that has to serve you..."

"Or maybe going shopping on the first afternoon of vacation is not the best of the ideas..." suggested Kyle

"You're right, I should have moved before" I admitted "But don't worry, you'll have your chocolate..."

Meanwhile, we had finally reached our goal, I paid and then Kyle guided me to the place that we had to try: "I read a lot of review, this must be incredible..."

"I'm not the right person to judge it" I laughed "I like chocolate in every of its forms..."

We ordered two hot chocolates with cream and sat on a free table: "Now we can finally relax..." commented Kyle

"Yeah" I agreed, with a smile "I think we really deserve this..."

"My teacher actually does not" declared the kid, passing me his phone "Just read our homework list..."

I took the phone, and I read the list and murmured: "Wow, what a bitch..."

"It's the same thing I said..." declared Kyle, when the waiter brought us the chocolates "Thank you"

While I was reading Kyle's homework list, a message arrived on his phone: it came from Sheila and said: "G's parents took off, they are coming tomorrow morning: not a word with him ;)"

I made a surprised face: "My parents?"

Kyle immediately understood what had happened: "It had to be a surprise..."

"Oh, Jesus..." I sighed, covering my eyes with the hands

"Aren't you happy?" asked the kid "Your parents are coming..."

"Yeah, obviously" I pointed out "But I'm a bit afraid of their reaction to the city..."

"Why?" was Kyle's question, stopping drinking

"I haven't told them so much about how South Park is" I explained "This is a... particular place: not everyone fits for it..."

"Don't worry, they will like our town" declared Kyle "Now drink the chocolate and don't think about it..."

I obeyed, and admitted: "Wow, this is awesome!"

"I told you that..." smirked Kyle

On the following morning, December 23rd, I made irruption in Kyle's bedroom after I had brush my teeth: Stan, Cartman and Kenny were there with my host brother: "Guys, my parents are arriving in a few minutes" I informed

"So?" asked Cartman

"Nothing, I'm just warning you to behave yourself" I said, then I listed "Cartman, do not swear or insult anyone; Kenny, no sexual jokes; Kyle, no acid answers"

Stan raised his hand: "And me?"

I looked at him for some seconds, then I admitted: "You're good like you are: please kids, let me make a good impression..."

"Ok, ok" surrended Cartman

The doorbell rang: "They are here!" I exclaimed, nervous "Kyle, come downstairs to meet them..."

Kyle obeyed and we went to open the door: "Mamma! Papà!" I greeted in Italian, hugging them (and from here every dialogue with them will be directly translated into English to make your comprehension easier).

"G!" exclaimed my mother, with shining eyes "You look great!"

"I try to keep in shape..." I smiled

"But you never do anything at home..." laughed my father "Is it the American atmosphere?"

"Thank you for trusting me, dad" I commented, sarcastically, then I changed topic "He is Kyle, my host brother"

"Hello!" greeted Kyle

"Nice to meet you!" answered my mother "You're so cute, how old are you?"

"He's nine, he's our oldest son" intervened Gerald, that held Ike's hand "Please, follow me: can I offer you something to drink?"

"You're really kind" affirmed my dad "I hope that my son is as well..."

"Naturally" declared Sheila "He's really sweet, Kyle and his friends immediately became fond of him..."

"It's also thanks to the fact that he trains the soccer team of the elementary school..." added Gerald "They are in the first places of the chart..."

"We couldn't be happier of that" said my father

At that moment, the other three kids came there: "Kyle, would you want to go back playing?" asked Stan, then he noticed my parents "Oh, hello!"

"Hello!" answered my mother "Are they some of your players, G?"

"Yeah" I confirmed "They are Stan, Eric and Kenny..."

Kenny shaked his hand, while Cartman asked: "Have you solved your problems?"

"What problems?" demanded my dad

"Your problems with organized criminality..." started Cartman

I looked at him with a glance that clearly said "You're a fucking douchebag": Cartman luckily noticed it and corrected himself, rolling his eyes: "Because every single person that goes to Italy has his heart stolen by the beauty of your country..."

"Oh, you're so funny" laughed my mother "But now we had to go to our hotel, our taxi is waiting for us: see you later, G!"

I greeted my parents, and when they had gone I asked Cartman: "Organized criminality!? Are you crazy!?"

"All of this stories for an innocent joke" commented the kid "Have a few laughs..."

"Thank you for helping us with the sufganiyah, G" thanked Sheila " "It's an important part of Hanukkah celebration"

"You're welcome" I answered, while kneading the typical dessert "Despite the fact I'm not Jewish, I'm pretty curious of this way to celebrate on 25th of December..."

At that moment, Kyle ran in the kitchen: "He's back! He's back!" he shouted

"Keep calm, dude" I laughed "What happened? Who's back?"

"Mr. Hankey is coming back!" exclaimed Kyle

"Mr. Hankey?" I repeated

"Yeah, the Christmas poo" confirmed the kid "He comes out of the toilet every year and gives presents to everybody who has a lot of fiber in their diet"

"So it's like a... piece of feces..." I said

"Basically yes, I thought I'd already told you that" answered Kyle "He's presenting his annual show in the central square tomorrow evening..."

"Oh god, I hope that my parents won't discover it..." I commented, washing my hands

"Why?" asked the kid

"Why!?" I repeated, shocked "What would my parents think if they discovered that here the main event for Christmas is a show presented by a poo?"

"Whether you like it or not, it's a tradition" declared the kid "And your parents will join it..."

"They won't, if I find a way to keep them away..." I affirmed "You have to help me, together we will find a solution..."

"Really simple" said Kyle "You have to see Jessie tomorrow, right?"

"Yeah" I confirmed

"You can bring your parents with you and let them explore the surroundings of the place you will be" explained the kid "And you can keep them far from the central square..."

"You're a genius, Kyle!" I exclaimed "That's what I'll do!"

"No problem" answered the kid "But if you change you opinion, Mr. Hankey will be there for you..."

"Are you sure that this is not a problem?" I asked Jessie on the following late afternoon, Christmas Eve: we were in front of my parents' hotel, waiting for them.

"No, honey" answered my girlfriend with a smile "I'm happy to meet your parents and help them to better know our town"

"You're the best!" I exclaimed, kissing her "Oh, they are coming..."

My parents approached to us, and my mother greeted: "Hi, G! Who's this girl?"

"She's my girlfriend, Jessie" I answered, putting an arm on her shoulders

"Nice to meet you" smiled Jessie, shaking their hands

"The pleasure is ours" declared my dad "You've really good taste, son..."

"DAD!" I exclaimed, becoming red

Jessie burst into laughs, then said: "Now we'll go ice skating, but you can follow us: there are a lot of shops that surround the track, so you'll have a good time as well..."

"Thank you, Jessie, you're really kind" declared my mother, jumping in my car "We happily accept you invitation"

After some minutes of driving, I were attached to the balustrade of the track with Jessie encouraging me: "Come on, G: it's easy!"

"Keeping the balance is not my thing..." I admitted "Especially on ice"

"But you can't know that if you don't try..." continued my girlfriend

In one hour I beat my back on the ice for an infinite number of times: if I hadn't seen Jessie's smile, I think I wouldn't have resisted for such a long time...

We had dinner in a little French restaurant, where in front of a omelette and a lobster Thermidor I could finally give Jessie my present: "Thank you, G, they are beautiful" smiled Jessie, kissing me "It have something for you, too..."

She gave me a black baseball hat and a new cover for my phone: "I knew you needed some things, so I bought them..." declared the girl

"You're the best!" I exclaimed, raising my glass "Merry Christmas, Jessie!"

She raised it, too: "Merry Christmas, G!"

After our dinner, we reunited with my parents: "Did you like the place?" I asked

"Yes, it was a long and interesting walk" confirmed my dad "But now what could we do? In a few hours there will be Christmas..."

"Well, we could..." started Jessie, but her phone rang and interrupted speech "Sorry... Yes?... What's the matter?... Ok, I'll ask him: G, my parents need a lift, could you give them that?"

"Sure, where do they have to go?" I asked

"They have to go back home from the central square: Jackson is not feeling good and their car doesn't start..."

Those words suddenly paralyzed me, but in that moment I understood one thing: I had to face my fears: "Yes" I answered, swallowing a bit of saliva "I'll do that..."

"You're a sweetheart, G" affirmed Jessie, before murmuring "I'm so sorry..."

It was the moment of truth...

I left my parents and Jessie in the central square, that was already packed with people: "Why are there so many people?" asked my mum "Is there an event?"

"Yeah, a kind of: I'll explain you that later..." I answered, while Jessie's parents jumped into my Volkswagen "I'll be here again in a few minutes..."

I brought Jackson, Carlos and Gloria home: "Thank you, G" thanked Gloria

"No problem" I smiled "Get well soon, Jackson!"

After greeting Jessie's family I went back to the central, reaching my parents in the exact moment when the show started: "Mum, dad, there is something I have to tell you..."

They didn't answer and (probably) either hear me, since they were frozen in their positions: Mr. Hankey had just entered the stage: "Merry Christmas to everybody!" exclaimed the piece of feces, sending kisses to the crowd

Kyle and the others were some places ahead, and when my host bother turned back and noticed that we had arrived he made a terrified face: "Yeah, the main event for Christmas in South Park is a show presented by a sentient poo..." I declared

After a minute of silence, my dad was the first to speak: "Wow, this is..."

"Absurd? Terrible? Gross?" I interrupted him "I know that, and I don't blame you if you think this is not a good place for me..."

"See, G" said my dad "Since we have arrived here we noticed a lot of peculiar things: the kids that doesn't take off their hat when they are inside, the adults drive like they were drunk..."

"They actually are" I admitted, looking down

My mum finally spoke, too: "But in these days we've seen your eyes sparkling like they never did before: we have no doubt that this is the right place for you..."

I raised my eyes and smiled: "Are you sure?"

"Yes, G" confirmed my father "The only thing we want is a happy son and, from what we see, here you are..."

I hugged them: "Thank you, for everything..."

We enjoyed Mr. Hankey's show, that consisted in a great concert of Christmas songs, and when the midnight came, I approached to the kids: "Merry Christmas, guys!"

"Merry Christmas to you, too, coach!" answered the team

"So?" asked Kyle, impatient

"Everything ok" I smiled "They've understood..."

Kyle smiled back, I kneeled down and he hugged me: "Merry Christmas, G"

"Happy Hanukkah, Kyle..."