Chapter 14: The Rest of the Letter
Tuesday- 14 April 1812
Darcy woke as the sun broke through the horizon. Elizabeth still slept beside him, so he decided to finish the letter. As he delved further into the missive, his initial thought was that he needed to make a copy for Richard, Charles, and a few other close friends. Chuckling to himself, he remembered that was exactly what Elizabeth and her friends had done. Ah, but Charles would not need a copy, he remembered as he dug into the world of bedroom activities from a woman's point of view. Mrs. Collins' aunt covered so many technical details, Darcy wondered if the woman had worked in a brothel.
He found some of her information on the basics needs of men enlightening. Few of the gentlemen he knew would discuss most of what she shared with her niece. She wrote that every man had different needs, whereas some must have relief at least once a day, others might only need once every week or two. The older require it the less frequently. (This was news to him, most of the older men he heard talking in the clubs sounded like they were active every day.) Sometimes, men would have difficulty becoming firm, but the woman could take advantage of the morning state of arousal or a device to emulate an aroused man's part.
It surprised him to read that some women desire pleasure more often than their husbands could supply. From the gentlemen's complaints in the clubs, he thought the opposite to be the case. Mrs. Collins' aunt ended her section on men by giving recommendations for making a man erect or for offering him relief without his occupying her.
She went on to discuss the bleeding, 'menstruation' or 'courses' as they were called, explaining about different experiences women might have: Some suffer from it for more than a week, others only a few days. Some bleed profusely, others lightly. He wondered about Elizabeth's, though the information helped appease Darcy's guilt over the whole blunder after their first night.
To prevent conception, she recommended making the man wear a sheath to catch the releases. Coitus interruptus should also work, but the woman would have to trust the man to have the self-control to remove. Some women practice periods of abstinence half-way between menstruations, but that method was less effective. She instructed that although fluids would drain out after copulation was complete, the seed would stay. She recommended feeding your own child to heal the body and keep further pregnancies at bay. (1)
Once a woman was with child, she advised that certain body parts would become more sensitive and recommended that this situation be fully taken advantage of. Some doctors may recommend stopping conjugal activity while a woman was increasing, but she had worked with many women who happily continued throughout their pregnancy without injury to the child or mother. Some felt that amorous congress helped make the birthing easier.
He looked at Elizabeth, who still slept. If she would enjoy it even more and it would help with delivery, then he had a responsibility to continue after conception. It would ensure the health and viability of his heir. He could make that sacrifice. Willingly.
Next, Aunt Margaret described different afflictions some women experienced after coupling. She recommended washing and using the chamber pot both before and after. If the woman was pleasing herself, hand washing before and after were important. If something had touched the windward passage, it should never go forward without a thorough wash. Disgusted at the thought of such a thing, Darcy could not understand why she would include such advice. She gave medicinal information for the ailments: use of fermented milk for one type, drinking large amounts of a special tea for another.
From there she went on to the more specific information on men pleasing women. She instructed her niece that the only universal is that nothing is universal. Every woman's tastes differ, that one way of learning them is for the woman to find her own pleasures.
Thankfully, the aunt listed some of the items most women tend to enjoy. Darcy took careful note. Sensitive areas included the neck, the ear, the breast, the inner thighs, the derrière, the stomach, and the most sensitive spot toward the front of the cleft of Venus. She recommended her niece find the spot herself and use either her own lubrication, saliva, or oils to discover for herself which manipulations of that spot caused the greatest pleasure. She reviewed the different types of touch men could use on those sensitive parts and suggested ways men could use their mouths. She offered hints, including drawings, for various positions to use while coupling. Some of those positions are surely not possible, he thought. The aunt instructed that some couples find excitement in play-acting different situations. She recommended her niece take advantage of the play-acting by envisioning her husband as a ruggedly handsome man like Lord Nelson or Lord Wellington. It would help her achieve her peak.
Elizabeth has no business finding pleasure envisioning me as someone else! The idea offended Darcy.
As he continued to read, Elizabeth stirred. She opened her eyes to Darcy scowling at the thought of his lover wishing him to be someone else. Realizing he was near the end of the letter, but not knowing where, she snickered, assuming he had reached the last paragraph.
"What displeases you so?"
Darcy looked at her, now forcing a small smile. "Just the play-acting seems a bit … unnecessary."
"Oh," she looked disappointed, "I thought it might be something else. Continue. I'll go refresh."
As he watched her go, enjoying her bare rear, he realized this was the first time they had risen together. That their personal morning rituals would now play out together. Darcy indulged in the feeling of comfort, he could easily become accustomed to waking in such an agreeable manner.
Finishing the letter, Darcy read the part Elizabeth referenced. The aunt explained to her niece that women enjoy coupling more than men do, but society works to hide it from maidens to keep them from temptation. It has long been known, the letter read. In Greek mythology, Hera turned Apollo's blind prophet, Tiresias, into a woman as punishment for striking Hera's mating snakes. During his time as a woman, Tiresias became a prostitute of great renown. After seven years, the female Tiresias again found mating snakes and left them alone. Thus, he was forgiven and his manhood returned. Much later, Hera and Zeus fought about which sex enjoyed coupling more: Hera thought men, Zeus thought women. They applied to Tiresias as one who had experience as both. He said of ten parts, men enjoy one. Men tend to interpret that myth to mean women feel more pleasure at each individual peak, but, being a woman and knowing the experience myself, it could also mean for each time a man peaks, a woman may peak nine. (2)
The aunt suggested that her niece relish that part of being a woman but to do so in secret. Society condemns women who do not. A footnote was added: for some women, the more parts are stimulated, the more sensitive those parts become making the next stimulation easier. Each stimulation may be independent of one another, some strong, some mild, each enjoyable in its own way. She did recommend moderation. Sometimes too much stimulation could cause irritation or lead to other maladies. From there, she wished her niece as many felicitations in the marriage as she could find, and hoped her information was useful.
Darcy put the letter down to digest it. Recognizing the myth as one he had not thought of in many years, it intrigued him. He looked toward the water closet door wondering how willing she would be to experiment. He did not want to do anything to cause her discomfort, but given this new information…
Coming out, Elizabeth looked over to see Darcy staring at her with an odd expression. Wondering why he remained in her bed, she asked, "Is something wrong, sir?"
Half of his mouth twisted into a grin. "I finished your friend's letter."
Meeting his challenge, Elizabeth looked him in the eye. "Do you wish to share your thoughts?" She was sure he would be repulsed or offended by the idea of women taking more enjoyment than men.
"Yes," he smirked.
She waited, but he said no more. Insufferable man! Tilting her head to the side with her brow raised, she asked, "And? …"
His smile spread to both sides of his mouth. "I cannot share them with you over there." As she gasped in surprise, he laughed. "Come back to the bed," he ordered. "We are not yet finished."
Looking nervously around the room, Elizabeth tried to figure out what would come next. This changed her situation. She was accustomed to him coming to her in the night and being gone before she awoke. Now that was no longer to be. Although the sun was well above the horizon, it would still be a few hours before Anne or Lady Catherine would begin their day. Leaving on her dressing gown, she slowly made her way back to the bed before sliding under the bedclothes
"So we have finished the part to make your first night easier. And we have finished the part about you touching yourself." He ran his finger through the letter, tapping those completed before lingering on another section. "Now we get to the part about the bleeding, which was a relief for me to learn more about."
"Sir, you have skipped a significant portion," she pointed out. It would not be only Elizabeth laid bare, but Mr. Darcy's anatomy and humor must be analyzed as well. "The portion about men. Their preferences and abilities. You are many years my senior, has that afflicted you yet?" she asked impertinently with her chin tilted high with an amused air.
Chuckling, he replied, "Not at all." Gently grasping her hand and pulling her to him, "You have seen that for yourself."
Trying to offset him, she asked, "and your preferences? How frequent are you?"
He was not offset at all. Her interest delighted him. "Before I arrived at Rosings Park, I would relieve myself every week or two, but now I quite enjoy my everyday bent." Moving his mouth to her ear, he whispered, "Now that I have a venue, I may find I need it even more frequently."
Elizabeth's eyes widened. This was not what she expected from him. He was teasing her, laughing with her. "That part," he pointed at the section about men's impotence, "is not something to concern yourself over," he told her, "but I will remain in your bed each morning for you to utilize as you desire."
"You did not seem very utile this morning." Placing the letter back on the bedside table, he rolled his body alongside hers, running his hand up her dressing gown, lingering on her breast, and then moving up her neck.
"I did not know you would need it," he said, pressing his lips to hers. "But I am very utile right now if you wish to take advantage of it."
Elizabeth was not sure what to do. She could feel his stiffness against her leg. She already coupled once with him last night, would this be too much? Would this mean he would leave her alone tonight? Before she could come up with rational answers, he divested her of her nightdress and started distracting her with attentions as recommended by Aunt Margaret. Deciding she had no reason not to enjoy his diligence this morning, she let him do what he would while she allowed herself to feel each sensation to the fullest.
~~~oo0oo~~~
It must be exhausting for him, she thought. Every time he goes to sleep. Elizabeth did not respond in the same way. While sometimes it induced her to sleep, other times it invigorated her. Such was the result of this morning's exertions.
Slipping away from Mr. Darcy's grasp, Elizabeth quickly cleaned herself, donned her chemise, grabbed her robe and stays, and then found Peeke to help her dress. She could not stay in her chambers all day.
Elizabeth went downstairs to break her fast and take a morning ramble about the park. She joined Lady Catherine at the table, who was not particularly pleased to see her.
"Why are you not in … ahem … other… company this morning?"
She tried to answer in a way that included reminding Lady Catherine the dangers of such comments with servants present, Elizabeth replied brightly. "I did not want to interrupt the newlyweds or impede their mission," she said with a pointed look. "As my morning duties are already complete, I thought I would take a stroll around the grounds after breakfast. Maybe call on Charlotte, if she has time."
Fortunately, Lady Catherine understood Elizabeth's message. Breaking free of the house, Elizabeth loped down the path. Basking in the open air and the freedom currently offered her, she ran to the grove, even hugging a tree in her delight. It seemed as if she had been trapped in that house and with those people forever.
After making a circuit through the park, she stopped at the parsonage. Enjoying the feeling of normality, she and Charlotte chatted over tea. Spending time with her dear friend relieved some of her sadness over Jane's leaving. Their little party finally broke up when Elizabeth needed to return to prepare for dinner. The other residents were busy with their own affairs which left her gleefully unencumbered as she raced her way up the stairs. Bursting into her room, she threw herself upon the bed, smiling.
"Pleasant day?" Jerking up at the deep voice, Elizabeth stared at Mr. Darcy. Was she to no longer have privacy in her room?
"Yes, sir. The weather today was too beautiful to remain indoors."
Cocking a brow, he questioned, "You have spent all morning outdoors?" (3) His sarcasm made her feel like a little girl answering for her misdeeds.
"Charlotte was home, so we were able to spend time together." Why was he interrogating her? He was not her mother, and her father would never treat her so.
"I woke up and you were gone. No one knew where you were," he accused.
Her defensiveness rising, she retorted, "Sir, do you not think it would look suspicious for me to remain in my chambers for the entire day? This gave the appearance of my leaving you and Anne alone. Is that not the effect wished for?"
Mr. Darcy glared at her until finally agreeing that she was correct. Turning to return to his chambers, Elizabeth reminded him he should use the main staircase rather than the hidden one.
"Mr. Darcy," she called as he exited her door. "To maintain propriety, you should be the one to escort Anne and Lady Catherine to dinner tonight. It would best serve your purpose if I were to enter alone."
Bowing, Mr. Darcy left.
~~~oo0oo~~~
Thursday - 16 April 1812
When they retired from the parlor to their chambers for the evening, Darcy escorted Anne. Elizabeth remained downstairs, Lady Catherine delaying her from retiring.
Using the main stairs to reach Elizabeth's room felt odd to Darcy. The hidden stairs in his chamber were much easier, and he did not have to be so public about his private activities. The thought of producing an heir with Anne disgusted him, so he felt some embarrassment at having to put on a public display.
When he passed Anne's door, she called him in. Smirking, she asked if he enjoyed her wedding gift to him. Uncertain how he should respond to this woman who was legally his wife, he assured her he enjoyed it. His desire was for Elizabeth to enjoy it more, but there was no need to tell Anne that. She laughed openly at him, but said no more, waving him on to Elizabeth's room as she closed her door.
Taking a few minutes in the hall, Darcy considered the oddity of his new predicament. It left him so conflicted. He and Elizabeth both knew Anne's belief that Elizabeth was his wife because she spoke the words of the wedding vow were ridiculous, another of Anne's manipulations. He should feel guilty for being an adulterer, but he did not. The more time he spent in Elizabeth's company, the more time he wished to spend with her. He now understood his peers who maintained mistresses. She had been correct that morning to leave the house and see her friend. It kept up the necessary appearances, but he hated it. He woke in her bed to find her gone. For the first time, he felt loneliness in an empty bed.
Loneliness. He was a man accustomed to loneliness. His parents' marriage was not close. Once he had been born, his mother spent most of her time in Town while his father took charge of his upbringing at Pemberley. His father had always been a serious man, so Darcy's childhood held little mirth. When Georgiana was born, his father cared nothing for his wife's child although he fulfilled his responsibility. The baby in the nursery showed Darcy unrestrained affection and unconditional adoration for the first time in his life. He spent all his free time playing with his baby sister. When their mother died, he decided his little sister, now left with no true parents of her own, would act as her parent. (4)
Now that little girl was reaching adulthood, and she would leave him in another few years. Last summer, Wickham's perfidy enraged him. How could the man even consider marriage with his baby sister? But Darcy had been forced to take another look at his baby sister. He realized she was no longer a little girl, and although Wickham was indeed a monster for what he had done, other more honorable men would be asking for her hand soon. She was now sixteen and would be out within a year or two. With her gentle personality, excellent connections, and large dowry, Georgiana would marry soon after entering society. She would leave his household for her husband's. He keenly felt the loss of his good friend Bingley as a potential suitor for her.
His thoughts of loneliness brought him back to Elizabeth's bed. His visits with her helped mute the endless isolation. With all the turmoil of the last few weeks, he had not considered it before. After the discomfort of being forced into the situation, he now realized he had never slept half so well or woken half so … content. Richard had forewarned: lying with a woman so often would change him. Maybe it had, but he did not think lying with Anne or, God forbid, lying with the ilk of Charles' sister, would have the same effect as amorous congress with Elizabeth.
It had started just over a fortnight ago. It would certainly last until she carried his child, but how long would that be? She may already be with child, but it would take some time to find out, and he could not leave her bed until it was confirmed. How long would that take? He considered asking Anne but doubted she would know much more than he. Becoming irritated at the lack of such information in the letter from Mrs. Collins' aunt, Darcy remembered Anne's doctor, Mr. Pryce. As a co-conspirator in their machinations, Darcy would be able to ask at his next visit. Once in possession of answers, he would decide his course of action. In the meantime, he would enjoy his duties.
His duties, he snorted as he opened Elizabeth's door, finally admitting to himself it had never been a duty. He looked around but did not see her. Assuming she was once again in the water closet, he found the letter, then made himself comfortable in Elizabeth's bed while waiting for her to finish. As he reviewed the parts they had not tried yet, envisioning what would be required, he realized he had been waiting quite a few minutes. Finally going to the door, he called to her. When no answer came, he wondered if he should open the door to check. Hesitating—how gauche would it be for him to open the door on a lady in the middle of using the chamber pot?—he laughed after remembering he watched her walk the room unclothed. Opening the door, he found an empty room.
Damn! She was not there, was not even in her rooms! Where was she? She could not have gone for a walk at this time of night. She must be in the house, but where?
Donning slippers and the clothing necessary to wander the house, he asked Anne if she knew of Elizabeth's location. She did not and waved him off. His hackles raised, Darcy headed to the main rooms. The parlors, sitting rooms, and music room were now empty. Unable to contain his concern, he started moving faster through the rooms trying to find her. A thousand possibilities came to mind, few reassured him. Looking around the study to no avail, he finally thought of the library. Maybe she went down to get a book!
He breathed a sigh of relief when he found her surveying titles. Walking silently into the room, he put his own candle on a table then slipped behind her. With one hand he took her candle, the other he wrapped around her waist. "What are you doing?"
He surprised her into impertinence. "Digging for the lost world of Atlantis. Is that not what most people do in a library?"
"Most people do not make a habit of disappearing."
Her irritation was evident, as she retorted, "alas, I may have at times wished for the ability, but I have never once made myself vanish."
In frustration, Darcy moved closer. Elizabeth arched her brow at him. "Anne gave me the freedom to choose whichever books I wish from her library. Who are you to deny me?"
Looking at her defiance, her fearlessness, Darcy found he had no more objections and captured her mouth with his own. Surprised, she tried to pull her head back, but the shelved books blocked her movement. He released her, unsatisfied. There was no fulfillment without her participation, but her eyes were narrowed at him.
"Madam, I would never deny you," he said as he began again. Softer this time, only brushing her lips with his own. Moving his hands to encircle her waist, he pulled her closer as his tongue trailed down her neck. Encouraged by the catch in her breath, he moved his hands lower to fully delight in the feel of her buttocks. Pressing her against his arousal, he reached to lift her. If he brought her to the chair, she could be the dragon upon St. George, a position suggested by the aunt. (5)
"What are you doing!" an indignant voice hissed from across the room. He turned, startled to see Catherine de Bourgh in the doorway, her face a study of conflicting emotions. Closing the door behind her, she lowered her voice appropriately. "This is no place for such behavior. You could be seen. Do you have no decency?" she asked, staring down Darcy. "The two of you have no reason to interact outside the privacy of Anne's wing, it invites questions." Softening her bluster, she continued. "I am glad to know you are diligently working towards an heir, but we must maintain appearances. No blowing off the groundsills around my house." (6) With that as her final word, Lady Catherine turned to leave. Before she opened the door, she again looked toward them. "Do not go to the wing together. Miss Bennet, you go now. Darcy, stay another ten minutes, then you must use the dressing room stairs so the servants do not know that you left the wing." She turned and stormed out the door.
Looking up at Darcy in embarrassment, Elizabeth curtseyed, then scurried to her room. Darcy watched the clock. Frustrated at being interrupted, frustrated at his aunt's reprimand, frustrated at Elizabeth disappearing, frustrated at his lack of knowledge of pregnancy, just FRUSTRATED. The seconds droned on … and on … and on … the clock barely moved. When the ten minutes finally passed, he stormed to his chambers. Taking an additional few minutes to regain control of himself before returning to Elizabeth's room.
Tentatively opening the door to her room, he looked around, almost expecting to find her absent once again. She was not. She was looking out the darkened window, turning toward him when she heard the door open. She was openly glaring at him!
"Sir," she hissed, "Never do such a thing to me again!" She moved toward him, poking his chest with her finger. "You may induce fear in others by towering over them with your great height, but it will not work with me. I will not have you risking my future security because of your inability to gain control of yourself." Huffing, she returned to the window. (7)
Having spent the past fifteen minutes working to gain control of himself, Darcy once again found his frustration rise. How dare she accuse him, the master of self-control, of being out of control. She had not been unaffected by his attentions in the library. He heard her breath quicken and felt her pulling him closer to her.
"Control," he spat. "You held just as much control as I did."
"I did not invite your attentions there!" she cried.
"But you did find them desirable," he countered. She glared at him, before conceding. Yes, to be seduced in the library had been exciting. Having been caught by Lady Catherine had not. It reminded her of her purpose, which angered her.
"It was a dangerous position for you to place me in."
"You were not where you belonged." She hadn't been in her room and Darcy had been concerned something had happened to her, but obviously she was not impressed with his concern. Her anger increased.
"Where I belong? I belong at Longbourn but I am here," she snarled. "I will not allow you to ruin my life. We all know how much you enjoy control. Your sex and your wealth allow you to walk away exactly as you entered. I enjoy no such freedom. YOU"—she pushed him back from her—"will not take my opportunities away because of your selfishness. I welcome your attentions here, in this room, and no place else." He had heard enough. She was supposed to be his respite from his aunt and cousin and all the concerns of the world.
"As you wish. I will not approach you outside of this room." He closed the distance between them, he pulled her to him, touching his lips into hers. When he felt her lips aggressively shove back on his, he began to remove her robe and stays. Looking up at him in challenge, she pulled his cravat causing it to tighten around his neck. He managed to remove it before being choked. Growling, he lifted her to his shoulder and threw off her slippers as he carried her to the bed.
It was a heated, passionate encounter. Both were angry, both wanted release. Darcy positioned her over him and tried to guide her to that rhythmic motion which would release the day's frustrations. She started bucking against his guidance, revolting against his own rhythm and taking her own. Initially frustrated, he soon came to realize her movements freed his hands and that all motion was good motion. He used his now free hands to feel along her stockings, then to feel the rear muscles contracting and releasing to maintain her movements.
The noises coming from her did as much to bring him to peak as the motion. As her face began the look of exquisite pain, he rose to kiss her. She held onto his shoulders, using them to brace herself. He grabbed around her waist again and thrust with everything he had. Watching her go over the edge, he finally allowed himself relief.
As they finished she leaned into him, surprising him by pressing her lips to his in a passionate embrace. Following her lead, he held them together, giving back as much as he received until he could no longer remain upright. Rolling to his resting position, he pulled her down to him. As he drifted to the arms of Morpheus, he breathed into her ear, "No more disappearing."
~~~oo0oo~~~
(1) These methods don't really work to control pregnancies. It was considered effective back in Regency England, but they didn't have the option of disposable condoms or pharmaceutical birth control. They did have condoms, but they were made from gut or lamb skin and reused.
(2) This is really a myth—although the interpretation is something I made up. You can Google him.
(3) According to the Annotated Pride and Prejudice, morning meant most of the day. From waking up until just before dinner. So he would be asking "you spent all day outside" in our terminology.
(4) The implication is Georgiana isn't the elder Mr. Darcy's child but the product of his wife's affair. She would have no parents as the lover would be unacknowledged as Georgiana's father and the elder Darcy didn't care for the child that represented his wife's unfaithfulness. But that wasn't something Darcy was going to admit when he first started all this with Elizabeth, so he hasn't told her yet.
(5) Dragon on St. George - woman on top.
(6) Blow off the groundsills - sex on the floor or on the stairs
(7) This is a technique US president Lyndon B Johnson used to intimidate people. At 192cm (6' 3.5"), when he wanted to intimidate people, he would stand close to them and lean over them. I've known two men, one was 193cm, the other 190cm, who would use similar techniques. I don't think they do it consciously, but it's something that's helped them get their own way for 30+ years, so they just do it. Here I'm assuming Darcy doesn't consciously realize what he's doing, but Elizabeth isn't impressed with his intimidation techniques.
Note: It was tempting to cut out huge chunks of this chapter. The letter from Aunt Margaret needs to be turned into an actual letter instead of the telling of a letter. The angry sex is no longer trendy as it still was in 2016. I decided to leave it as I don't have time or energy to do a major rewrite and I didn't want to accidentally cut out info that may be relevant later. Also, classes start this week. While I will be posting at least once a week, hopefully twice, I'm not sure how well I will be able to respond. I'll do my best though!