June helped Jack climb the stairway at the base. His legs were still weak, and his body was still sore. His missing arm was throwing his balance off. He ignored the bots looking at him. His mom had driven them to the base, Jack hadn't wanted the Autobots to come for him. He grunted slightly as he sat down. The atmosphere was awkward.

"Thanks Mom." He whispered. He sighed. He could feel everyone's eyes on him.

"Go back to your lives guys. I am not going to blow up." Jack snapped. Perhaps more harshly then he had intended. June sat beside him.

"Jack, take it easy. They are just worried about you."

Jack looked at his mom. After having been in a hospital bed for five months he was more then aware of everyone being concerned about him.

"I know mom." Jack stated. His eyes drifted back to the TV which flickered quietly. His right hand lifting up to his missing arm. He rubbed his shoulder. June looked over to Arcee. An apologetic look on her face.

Arcee smiled reassuringly. "Jack your mom tells me that in another week or so you should be able to go for ride."

Jack scoffed. "How can I ride with one arm Arcee. Think about it."

Arcee stepped back slightly. She was trying not to take offense to Jacks words. He was hurting after all."

June didn't see it that way. "Jackson I will not tolerate you being rude."

June whispered harshly to him. Jack just shook his head. His scars were healing nicely, and his eye wasn't swollen shut anymore. Miko and Raph had opted to remain quiet.

Jack sighed. He didn't need their pity. He was fine on his own. June patted his leg.

"I'll get you something to drink."

Jack didn't respond to her. He just stared at the TV screen.

…..

Ratchet noticed Jack getting worse. Not physically, but mentally. Each day he retreated deeper into himself. June was doing everything for him. She brought him to the base. Practically carried him up the stairs. And anything he needed or wanted she did for him.

Jack was getting more depressed and angrier. He barely spoke and when he did his voice was thick with hatred and hurt. It worried the Medic who had seen this before.

Jack side glanced his mom. She looked tired. He stared down at his jeans. She never left alone. He felt like his chest was weighed down. His life was never going to be normal again. He jumped every time a car door slammed. He flinched whenever someone said the word spider. He felt like panicking whenever he saw a jet or a helicopter.

He glanced discreetly around the room, and no one seemed to care. They went about their normal lives like nothing had happened. Arcee barely spoke to him, for that matter no one really spoke to him. Again, his fault. After all he had snapped at all of them. Even Optimus. What wasn't his fault? It was his stupid fault he had forgotten his phone. It was his stupid fault he didn't just tell them what they wanted to know. And it was his stupid fault for willing himself to live. He should have died. Then all of this pain and "healing" wouldn't have come to pass.

Jack yelped. Jolting upright and clenching his fist. He hissed through his teeth. Miko jerked her head up from her homework. Raph blinked in surprise. June turned to him rubbing his back.

"Breathe through it Jack."

The Autobots were all caught off guard by Jacks yelp. It sent a chill through Arcee.

"What's wrong?" She hesitated to ask.

"Phantom pains."

Ratchet replied without even looking up from his work. June nodded, turning her eyes to Arcee.

"Ratchets right. He has them from time to time."

Jack took a deep breathe and sat back. "Fragging hell…" he swore. June glared at him.

"Jackson." She stared at him, a deadpanned expression.

Jack just shrugged. His massaged his shoulder. Miko schoohed over to June she tapped her on the leg.

"Uh what are phantom pains?"

June sighed heavily. "When your body loses a limb, especially if its traumatically your brain doesn't register its loss…. Basically, the brain realizes somethings wrong when it can't talk to that limb and sends out pain signals to alert the body that somethings wrong."

Miko wrinkled her nose, she wasn't sure she fully understood but she didn't bother push further.

Jack had drops of sweat on his forehead. June patted leg.

"You okay?"

Jack glared at her. "Do I look okay? Would you call anything about me okay right now? My arm is missing mom! I can't just go to the store and buy a new one! I have scars all over me that look like I got into a fight with a set of knives, you honestly think any girl is gonna be attracted to this?"

Jack couldn't stop himself and he didn't want to. Something had snapped and he was finally letting loose everything he had been keeping inside for the past few days.

"Do you have any idea what I went through!"

Jack stood up; he was still shaky, but he stood, nonetheless. He waved his arm at June.

"I am broken, damaged, I'll never be the same and you sit there and ask me if I am okay? No Mom I am not okay!"

"Jackson!"

Jack's eyes were flaring. June looked sad and hurt but Jacks words. Jack looked toward the voice. He hadn't realized he was shouting. Optimus had come up behind June. He was staring at Jack. His eyes set on him. His body language was stern.

"What do you want?"

Jack snapped at him. Normally the Prime speaking his name in such a stern hard manner would have worried Jack. But not now. Now he didn't care. The Prime was only still alive because Jack had suffered in not telling Airachnid or StarScream where the base was.

"Do not speak to your mother in that manner."

Miko and Raph looked at each other. Optimus rarely ever spoke so sternly to the children. His voice was firm and authoritive, if not a little lower then normal.

Bumblebee lowered his head, he glanced at Arcee and Bulkhead who raised their eyebrows. Optimus was rarely harsh.

"She my mom Prime. I'll talk to her however I want."

Jack crossed his one arm over his chest in defiance. Before this whole thing he would never have dared to speak to Optimus so defiantly. But now, after having survived Airachnid and StarScream the Prime hardly scared him, even now when he was trying to be threatening.

June stood up patting the air. "Its okay Optimus. I understand why he's upset."

Optimus looked at her. "I am sorry June. But I cannot allow this disrespect. Not while you are within my base Jackson."

His eyes shifted back to Jack. Jack growled at him.

"Then maybe I don't want to be in "your" base, which by the way you wouldn't have or even be alive in right now if I would have told them where you are. So, your welcome by the way."

Optimus was reaching into the Matrix at this point for wisdom. Jack was right in that he had saved all of their lives, but it was still no excuse for his rude and disrespectful behavior. Jack turned and plopped back down on the couch. He seemed to think he had won that confutation June rubbed her face. Optimus could tell she was embarrassed among the stress.

Optimus looked over to Ratchet. The medic had dealt with Cybertronians who had lost limbs and were lost to depression before. Ratchet looked up at him, almost like he knew exactly what Optimus was thinking.

"June, Optimus can I speak with the two of you privately?"

Ratchet glanced between them. June nodded tiredly, stepping into Optimus's outstretched hand. The three walked to the back of the base. Out of earshot of Jack.

"June."

Ratchet went to start when June cut in. "Optimus I am so sorry. He's never been like this before."

June covered her hand with one hand. A few tears slipping down her face that she furiously wiped away. "I just don't know what to do anymore."

Optimus looked at June sympathetically. Ratchet reached up and placed a hand on Junes back.

"We have to get him to do more for himself, to get himself out this rut he's in."

June sniffled, collecting herself. "What do you mean?"

Ratchet folded his lips, hesitating before going on. "I have noticed you tend to… do everything for him."

June nodded. "He needs help."

Ratchet nodded. "To some affect, but if you continue to do everything for him, he will not learn how to do things for himself. If anything, June, please don't take this the wrong way, but you doing everything for him is only going to let him retreat deeper and deeper into himself."

June sighed heavily. "You're right I know. I have had to tell families the same thing before."

Ratchet smiled slightly. "I've dealt with mechs and femmes during the war that have gone through similar… situations that Jack has. With your permission June I would like to take over Jacks recovery. He'll have to stay here for a bit of time."

June looked between the two of them. "To be honest I was going to ask that anyway."

She reached into her pocket. Optimus noticed her hands shaking as she pulled a piece of paper out. "I found this…" June stammered. Her voice wavering like she might cry again.

"It was in his dresser drawer. I found it when I was putting his laundry away." She carefully unfolded it. "It's a…."

She put her hand to her mouth. The tears welling up in her eyes again. She sniffled and stomped her foot. She was trying not to cry. Hadn't she cried enough?

Optimus lifted her a little higher. "June?"

June wiped her face again. She held the paper in front of her limply.

"It's a suicide note."

Optimus's eyes went wide, Ratchet gasped quietly. Jack? Optimus could hardly believe that Jack of all beings would contemplate such a thing. June was crying again.

"I found it this morning. He says in here that he feels like he should have died. He feels useless now and broken. Its all his fault and he hates life, he just wants the pain to end."

She was sobbing and stammering. Ratchet looked up at Optimus.

"In that case he won't be left alone, at any point."

Optimus nodded. "I believe that best thing for Jackson right now is to leave him here June."

June nodded slowly. He handed the paper to Ratchet. "Here. Disintegrate that." She took in a deep breath. "Thank you. I didn't want to leave him along while I went to work. I especially didn't want to hire someone he doesn't know. I figured if anyone could get through to him you could."

She looked hopefully up at Optimus.

"Me?"

Optimus raised an eyebrow. He had been thinking Ratchet since the medic was experienced in this area.

"He sees you as a father figured. Since his dad left and believe me his dad was no prize. He hasn't really had good male role models. Then you lot showed up."

She waved between the two. Ratchet smiled slightly. He wrapped his hand around the note. He intended to save it for later. Optimus smiled as well.

"We will do our best June. We will save Jackson, as he has saved us."