What's this I see…another chapter for this fic! And so soon since the last one…compared to the last chapters published date at least heheheh…
Anyway, you all know me so let's not waste any time! Let's get this chapter rolling!
}Episode 5: Pyro-patory School{
There were many many many many many reasons why I wanted to scream in a very unmanly way, hijack the Bullhead that brought me to Beacon and fly to the nearest deserted island to live out my days as a hermit.
Most of those reasons all came from the fact that I had run into Cinder freaking Fall who was giving me a glare ever since I had bumped into her.
Logically she was probably just annoyed that some guy, who just so happened to look like a hobo and totally wasn't one, had just ran into her. The fact that she asked me what I was doing there can prove that.
But you see, I was a little distracted at the time because I was thinking of all the painful ways I was about to die and how most of them involved fire. I mean can you really blame me considering just who I had run into?
This was the woman who would bring the fall of Beacon in a few months if I had the timeline right. This was the woman who would cause a breach in Vale that would cause thousands of innocent civilian deaths at the hands of the Grimm and could care less about it.
For the love of God people, this was the women who literally turned Pyrrha to ash! After shooting her with a god damn fire arrow! So excuse me for wanting to run for the hills the moment I saw her.
Now somewhere in my panic induced mind I had another realization. Not only did I bump into Cinder, but she was at Beacon! She wasn't supposed to sneak into Beacon until the Vytal Festival, but there she was glaring at me months before it.
After I made this realization, my panic began to sky rocket. My eye started to twitch madly as I figured that there was no way Cinder being here early was good. In fact I think my exact thoughts were,
WHY THE HELL IS SHE HERE NOW!? This is soooooo not good! The only reason she would show up at Beacon early is because her plans are coming together faster than in the show! How is this even possible!? Don't tell me the universe decided to screw the entire world over just because I had some ice-cream with RWBY!?
Yeah, not good. I mean it made sense at the time. Cinder only showed up at Beacon because her plans were coming together and she needed to get rid of whoever was to inherit the Fall Maiden's powers so she could claim them for herself.
So, her being at Beacon then meant all of that was happening much faster. Which means I not only put Pyrrha into danger faster, but I somehow managed to cause the Breach to happen sooner than before!
While these scenarios danced in my head and my mind slowly fell down the pit of insanity, Cinder apparently had enough of the silent treatment.
"Did you hear me? What is a hobo like you doing on campus?"
I was so caught up in my panic induced thoughts that the only words I registered were 'you' and 'hobo.' Needless to say, I reacted as expected.
"I'm not a hobo! I just decided to wear some damaged clothes today!"
Of course, as soon as I said that I remembered just who I was talking to. When I did I wanted to cry and smash my head against something hard for the stupidity it had made me do. Of course that would only happen if Cinder decided I didn't need to be ash at the moment.
Don't get me wrong, I knew she couldn't kill me right then and there. It would look pretty suspicious if someone caught her with a charred corpse on campus, but that didn't mean she could just dispose of me when I was back in Vale, or even better have one of her groupies kill me and hide the body on campus.
But surprisingly Cinder's glare did not deepen, in fact her eyes widened slightly, and by slightly I mean for a micro-second before they went back to being a glare. After a tense, brief moment of silence in which I was mentally writing my will, she just sighed in annoyance and said,
"My mistake then, but you still haven't answered my question. Why are you here when you are clearly not a student or part of the faculty?"
"What about you? You look too old to be a student here, how do I know you're not just some pilot trying to hassle me after landing," I replied.
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Now I know what you're all thinking. Something along the lines of "you must have some sort of death wish for insulting the women who would bring an end to Beacon" right? But you see, me insulting her was a part of my plan to survive!
Now I know that doesn't make any sense, but let me explain before you claim that I need to be put into an Asylum or something. Too many people have claimed that and it gets old real fast. Remember a while back when I said I had a stupid amount of natural paranoia which only increased with the Butterfly Effect hanging over my head?
Also remember when I said I'm always making plans, then backup plans for those plans, then backup backup plans due to said paranoia? Well this was one of those plans.
You see I figured with my luck I would end up running into Cinder one way or another. Either I would run into her during the Breach or I would stumble onto her when she was scheming or something. The universe hates me, so I figured it was a possibility, and lo and behold I was right. So with that in mind I planned out the best way to survive an encounter with her with at least three of my limbs intact.
And just what was this brilliant plan you may ask? It was simple really, all I had to do was show no fear or hesitation around her. Now you may be thinking that it would be a better idea to show that I was afraid of Cinder, but you would be wrong.
If there's one thing I learned from binge watching RWBY far too many times for my own good, it's that Cinder loves it when people cower before her. She loves the feeling of being the most powerful person in the room and having people serve her out of fear rather than respect. Fear is what gives Cinder her power, that and how good she is at manipulating others.
With this in mind I decided that if I didn't show her fear, then one of two things would happen. She would either see though my plan and just write me off as someone trying to look cool, or she would decide that I was hiding something and needed to be taken care of.
Obviously I preferred the former rather than the latter, and yes I know that this whole plan was a major gamble on my part. There were so many things that could go wrong, not to mention the fact that I was terrible at hiding my fear. In fact, I had to focus really hard to just keep my body from not trembling in terror.
However, despite all that, my plan worked. A little too well to be honest considering all the stuff that happened later, but hey I survived in the end so a win's a win.
Anyway, now that we have that little explanation out of the way, let's get back to my struggle to survive by not saying anything stupid, shall we? There was a couple of seconds of silence after my gamble before she responded,
"I'm the Politics and Kingdom Relations teacher here at Beacon, now will you tell me why you're here or are you going to ask me my gender too?"
That last part immediately reminded me of how I asked Roman that exact question before kicking him in the gonads. With that in mind I wisely decided to back down and not have my balls destroyed…again.
Also, I sadly had to ignore the fact that Cinder of all people was teaching politics at that moment in the name of self-preservation, but I did file it away to make jokes about it to be used at a later date.
"N-no mam! My name's Chris Sullivan and I'm here to see the Headmaster about a job opening."
She gave me a suspicious glare (abet barely noticeable from her usual one) as she asked,
"Oh really? I don't remember Ozpin mentioning any job openings at the last teacher's conference. What's the job?"
Chuckling nervously, I answered,
"It's a janitor job Ms. An acquaintance of mine recommended me and I needed a job so…yeah."
I'm pretty sure Cinder actually lost her glare and gained a doubtful expression for at least a second before it returned with a vengeance.
"I…see. Well if that's the case you wouldn't mind me escorting you to his office then? Make sure you don't try to do anything that could cause harm to the school and its students. You understand I'm sure?"
"Pot meet kettle, it says you're black…" I didn't actually say this since I didn't want to alert the highly dangerous criminal that I knew she was a highly dangerous criminal, even though the timing would have been perfect. No, in reality what I wisely said instead was,
"Thanks lady but I think I can find his office myself, it's at the top of the huge tower, right?"
A surprised look actually adorned her face for a few seconds at that declaration.
"Yes...how do you know that?"
"It's one of the oldest clichés in the book. The big boss is always in the highest tower, you really need to get out more if you don't even know that," I explained since saying that I saw it from my laptop screen a few dozen times and practically memorized the layout of the entire school wasn't an option.
Once again, I was surprised at how easily Cinder gets annoyed when her eye twitched slightly. In fear of my knees buckling from being around her for too long I quickly began to walk away while lazily waving my hand behind me as I said,
"Welp thanks for the talk Cindy, but I need to get going. Oh and work on smiling, you're gonna scare every guy off if you only glare at them."
Thankfully before Cinder could say anything in retaliation I turned a corner and was out of her sight. Of course, as soon as I did I lost my cool facade and leaned onto the wall for support as all my pent up fear started rushing back to me.
"Oh…oh god I can't believe I just mouthed off to Cinder Fall and lived. I…I can never sleep again…or be alone in public…or alone at all for the rest of my life. I'm…I'm a dead man walking hehehehe…" I muttered, falling into insanity once more. And again, I don't belong in a dang asylum, falling into insanity doesn't mean you're permanently insane!
But yeah, even though it was my plan all along, actually mouthing off to her had taken a lot of effort, and my body was paying for it with the shakes. So focused was I on steadying my body and mind, I didn't notice the incredible source of heat coming from behind me until a scorching hot hand touched my shoulder.
Crap! My Gamble Failed! I'm so freaking dead! I screamed in my mind as my shoulder felt like it was melting.
As painful as it was, I only let out a quiet hiss of pain because I figured that if she was going to end me right then and there, then I was gonna go out with a straight face…and maybe get a desperate punch in before the end.
Either way I would get the last laugh before I died, so I figured why the hell not?
But imagine my surprise when instead of burning me to a crisp Cinder instead walked to my side and gave me a menacing glare.
"Mr. Sullivan I would appreciate it if you did not make jokes at my expense. If we are to be future co-workers, we should start off our relationship on a positive note after all. I also must insist that I go with you to the Headmaster's office. Wouldn't want anything…bad to happen to you on your way there would we?"
I knew I was beat, and I very well didn't want my shoulder melting, so I just sighed and nodded my head in reluctance. I swear I could feel the smugness rolling off her as she gave that glare.
"There, was that so hard Mr. Sullivan? This would have been so much easier if you had just decided to agree with me from the beginning."
I decided to ignore the threatening undertone of her comment as I stiffly began to walk with her towards Ozpin's office. To make the situation worse she never bothered to remove her hand from my shoulder, so I was getting extra crispy the entire walk there.
I ignored it to the best of my abilities, but the longer I did I swear the hotter my shoulder got.
Thankfully Cinder didn't seem to be in the mood to talk so we walked the whole way in silence.
When we eventually got into the tower and stood in front of the elevator leading to Ozpin's office Cinder finally let go of my shoulder.
Say what you will about her, but she knows how to hide her work. There wasn't a single burn mark on my shoulder, even though it felt bathed in fire. Stifling a sudden urge to jump for joy, I called the elevator down and gave Cinder a small nod of thanks. This served to cause her to have an…intrigued look to come across her eyes, which promptly caused me to internally scream.
Anything that caught that mad woman's attention was bad news.
Thankfully before anything could happen the elevator doors opened and I rushed in while practically slamming my finger down on the button.
As the elevator doors began to close I swear I saw Cinder's lips twitch upwards slightly.
"Good luck with the interview Mr. Sullivan."
I just stiffly nodded my head and kept a straight face as the doors closed. As soon as they did I gripped my shoulder and let out a sharp gasp of pain.
"Son of a bitch! I thought my shoulder was gonna melt off or catch aflame! I knew that lady was messed up but god damn it this hurts like hell!"
Okay, maybe gasp isn't the right word, but come on, that evil bitch made my skin feel like it was on a stove top. I continued moaning, and cursing whatever deity decided that the universe needed help in torturing me for a few minutes before calming done as the pain slowly left me. I decided then and there to never let Cinder get into my personal space ever again, no matter what! I wanted to avoid looking like an extra crispy tanner thank you very much.
After that I began to plan out by battle plan for dealing with Ozpin.
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What? You've all seen the show. You all know just how manipulative that old bastard can get. I was not about to become another one of his pawns for his little chess game with Salem. I would try and get the job, since I desperately needed the cash (and totally not because I was afraid of Ruby cornering me and giving me a disappointed look that would rack me with so much guilt I would die, totally not the real reason why I assure you), but there was no way in hell that I was gonna get wrapped up with Ozpin and his cronies.
I mean it was bad enough that I was tempting the Butterfly Effect by staying in the center of the plot in the first place, I was not about to dig myself a deeper grave thank you very much!
Besides, I did not need my life ending up like that one character from that My Turn fic. I did not need that in my life.
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You know it just occurred to me that I'll never see the end of that fic now. Or any of the other stories I followed when I read fanfiction (there's no shame in that dammit! There just stories using characters that aren't yours is all!).
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OH SON OF A BI-
}Line Break{
Ahem…sorry about that. Now where was I?…Oh yeah!
After a few more minutes on the elevator (which had some surprisingly catchy elevator music that didn't make me want to bash my head against a wall) I finally arrived at my destination.
The doors open to reveal the ever-iconic room that was Ozpin's office.
Man, I thought this place looked awesome before! It really is like stepping into the inside of a clock…jeeze there's even tick-tock sounds all over the place! I mentally fangasmed.
I would have analyzed the room more if I didn't remember why I was here. That reminder came in the form of Ozpin himself sitting at his desk with Goodwitch behind him at the end of the room.
In front of them was a lone chair, which I could only assume was meant for me. Gulping nervously, I made my way over to the chair. Extremely nervous, I tried to not stare at either of them but whenever I took a glance, it was always the same expression.
Ozpin had a look of pure and utter calm on as usual, as did Glynda, but I swore I saw some anger behind her eyes. I promptly decided to ignore it as I didn't feel like being flung out of the room and falling to my death.
Anyway, I sat down on the chair and tried to get into a calm position. I don't think I did that good of a job to be honest, but I couldn't tell as the always blank face of Ozpin did not help.
After a few moments of silence I decided to try and break the silence.
"So…lovely weather we're having today right?"
That…got no reaction out of them. At all.
Ge-geeze tough crowd! At least glare at me or something for the terrible ice breaker! I mean come on just staring at me is creepy as all he-
Before I could finish my thought, Ozpin took a sip of his ever present coffee before saying,
"Yes it is. Hopefully it'll be like this for the rest of the week. The students always seem to do better during combat class when they aren't fighting in the rain. Isn't that right Ms. Goodwitch?"
Glynda just nodded her head at this.
If this is your attempt of calming me down then it's not working! At least have some emotion on your face when you talk dude!
My thought went unheard as expected as Ozpin took another sip of his coffee before saying in his annoyingly calm tone,
"I must say I'm surprised Mr. Sullivan. Given our last interaction I would assume you wouldn't want to see me again."
"Hahahahah what!? What could have possibly given you that idea?" I chuckled nervously.
Ozpin just continued with his blank look as he continued,
"Your response to me reading out your profile aside, I do recall you grumbling something along the line of 'damn annoying manipulative old man' as you left the station."
Yeah…I may have left that part out of my little recap of the shop robbery.
You see I had been a little more annoyed at Ozpin for telling Ruby my fake backstory than I let on, and I may or may not have stormed out of there grumbling a bunch of insults at said man when they let me go.
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Okay in my defense that was a really bad day for me! I mean my workplace got blown to shreds with all my food and clothes in it, and I almost died. I was allowed to be annoyed at an old man if I wanted to dang it!
Anyway, I tried to keep the surprise off my face when he said that as I quickly tried to cover my mess up.
"Oh I wasn't talking about you! Hehe, I was talking about that douche who robbed me! I mean I know mister fancy-pants may look young but I was betting he was pretty old. He got my place of work blown up and all that. Hehehehehe…"
Nailed it
Yeah…I did not 'nail it' as my mind claimed, but I guessed it worked out in the end.
"Ah…I see. Well sorry about that misunderstanding," he said in his usual blank tone.
"It's fine. Happens to everybody right?"
"Indeed," he nodded, "Now then I suppose we should get along to the point as to why you're here. I assume Ms. Rose managed to finally hunt you down correct?"
"Yeah, she and her sister ran into me. After an…interesting meeting with her sister w-"
I was cut off when Ozpin actually freaking chuckled, which took me aback.
"Oh yes. The 'Accidental Ball-Busting' Ms. Xiao Long told me about," he replied with a smirk.
"That was no accident! That she-devil almost killed me over a simple misunderstanding!" I snapped.
This simply made Ozpin raise his eyebrow as if to give me an 'are you sure' look. I just huffed in annoyance.
Figures my misfortune is what makes this jerk wad show emotion. Stupid troll. And why in hell would she tell him about that? What possible purpose other than to torment me?! I mentally anguished.
"Anyway," I began, trying to get back on track, "after that totally not an accident event happened we went to get some ice-cream. The rest of her team showed up and I-"
"Proceeded to embarrassed Ms. Schnee by using some 'sick burns' and making her indirectly call herself a 'flat chest.' I do believe she slapped you after that."
While I was silently cursing Ozpin with everything I could think of, Goodwitch proceeded to glare at me while silently bringing up her riding crop in a threatening manner.
I (wisely) decided to end my cursing of Ozpin and speed up the conversation before Goodwitch could do anything.
"Sir if you already know all this then you clearly must know why I'm here," I grumbled.
Thankfully that seemed to do the trick as Ozpin regained his look of no emotion before clearing his throat.
"Ah yes, I just wanted to validate that the information my students gave me. Judging by your reactions I'd say they were spot on. Now onto the matter of your janitorial job…"
He then proceeded to reach his hand under his desk. When he brought his hands back out he was holding…
A chess set.
Oh god danmmit!
"Now, Glynda and I will proceed to ask you a series of questions to see if you're qualified for the job."
"And the chess set sir?" I asked, glaring at the damn annoying thing.
"Merely to pass the time while we talk Mr. Sullivan," he answered with a glint in his eye. "I always found that chess was a good way to judge a person's character. So with this and the questionnaire, we'd be able to kill two birds with one stone."
I wanted to call him out on his bull-shit right then and there. I knew the real reason he wanted me to play chess. He didn't want to use it to pass the time at all.
No…he was gonna use it to analyze me, to judge me if I was a threat or not. Because Ozpin wasn't lying when he said chess is a good way to judge a character.
It gives you an insight into how your opponent's mind works. How willing they were to take risk by how much they put their pieces up for grabs. How patient one is by how long they take to make a move.
If they were a strategizing genius, or just a dullard…and if they could be used on the battlefield.
Anyway, like I said I wanted to call him out on his BS, but I went against my better judgment with the angry lady in the room.
"Uh…sure. I used to play on my school's chess team so I know a thing or two, but you are older than me. They say wisdom and patience comes with age after all."
Ah…getting a crack at Ozpin's age still feels good to this day. I would make plenty of more cracks later, but this one still holds a special place in my heart.
But yeah, my little jab didn't have an effect on Ozpin, but it seemed to effect Glynda pretty hard as her eye began to twitch angrily. But before she could do anything Ozpin simply held his hand up, and she backed down almost immediately.
She would continue to glare at me for the rest of the day and week, but it was totally worth it.
I won't go into too much detail on the interview/chess match. The questions were the standard 'any past experience/criminal record' kind of stuff. The match however was close as Ozpin (the white pieces) and me (the black ones) went at it and came down to a victory for Ozpin.
But I was close I tells ya! I was close!
Anyway, for those interested in how Ozpin beat me he managed to corner my king with his rook and queen, while all I had was a rook and knight trying to checkmate him. But he had the lead and got me first.
And I know you're all gonna make a big deal out of me almost beating Ozpin in chess of all things, but I had a feeling he wasn't going all out. The only reason he had the game was to analyze me after all, so there wasn't a real reason for him to put all his effort in.
At least that's the best reason I can come up with.
So yeah, after he won there was a few minutes of silence before Ozpin took a sip of his coffee and said,
"Well Mr. Sullivan I must say I had my doubts about you, but after this I do believe that you are perfect for the job."
Gee, way to make janitorial work sound so important Ozzy. Almost makes me forget how much it's gonna suck to clean up all the puke from Vomit-Boy. Almost.
Ozpin stretched out his hand before he continued,
"Welcome to Beacon."
I couldn't keep the smile off my face as I stood up and shook his hand while saying,
"It's a pleasure to be here sir."
After our handshake, Ozpin sat back down and took another sip of his coffee before he said,
"Well I think it's best to let you get to work right away. Glynda if you could please escort our new janitor to the Maintenance Room so he may grab his equipment and uniform."
Goodwitch nodded her head at this and began to head for the elevator. I started to follow her, but as I started to get on the elevator Ozpin called out,
"Oh, one more thing Mr. Sullivan."
I felt some dread when he called out to me. I mean it's never good when the character who just got hired's boss has one final word to give them. Usually it's a 50/50 if it's good or bad advice, but I figured with my luck so far it would be the latter.
So with reluctance, and ignoring the idea to just pretend I didn't hear him, I turned my head back to Ozpin.
"Yes, sir?"
Then Ozpin did the unthinkable. The old bastard gave me a smile! Not just any smile mind you, he gave me one of those smiles that a grandfather usually gives to their grandkid when they do something they liked.
So basically, the old-man I just met was giving me a grandfatherly smile, which is totally not creepy. Not at all…if you couldn't tell, that was sarcasm. It was creepy as all hell! I just met the guy after all. Maybe given a few months with him then I'd have found it only slightly creepy, but right off the bat it was pure creepiness people.
So yeah, he…THAT, and said,
"My office is always open if you need any help, and I wouldn't mind having another match against you. This match was very…interesting and I'd like to try my hand against you again."
Plastering on a smile as I replied,
"Sure thing old man. But I'm warning ya, next time you're going down."
On the inside, however, I couldn't help but think,
Geeze old timer! Isn't analyzing me once good enough for ya?! I swear if the next match has Ironwood there I am soooo quitting!
Ozpin just kept that smile on his face as he nodded. From that I assumed that was all and I got on the elevator with Goodwitch. She sent me a not-so-subtle glare for my comment on Ozpin's age, and the elevator ride down was one of silence…minus the catchy elevator music that is.
}Line Break{
To say that the walk to the Maintenance Room was awkward would be an understatement. Goodwitch glared at me the entire walk there. And trust me when I say having Goodwitch glaring at you is almost as scary as Cinder glaring at you.
Since I dealt with both of them in the span of a morning, I could honestly say they were equally terrifying. The fact that one of them could burn me to death while the other could lift me up with BS telekinesis powers did not help down-play the terror I felt.
I mean you'd figure I'd be more relaxed with Goodwitch's glare than with Cinder's, she is one of the good guys after all.
Well if you figured that, you're dead wrong.
You see the fanfics weren't wrong with depicting Goodwitch as a woman who has an aura that just makes everyone around her want to cower in fear if they got on her bad side. To make matters worse I just knew she was gonna lecture me, so the fact that it hadn't happened yet was not doing well for my psyche.
But thankfully the mental torture ended when we arrived at the Maintenance Room door. "How did I know this?" you ask considering it was never showed in the show? Well that is quiet simple my friends, there was a huge ass sign above the door that stated, in bold, that this door was the Maintenance Room.
Leave it to Ozpin to make a simple Maintenance Room entrance to be all flashy and out there, I thought as I chuckled nervously.
With that thought I turned towards Goodwitch and was about to thank her for the escort when she beat me to it.
"Here we are Mr. Sullivan. This will be your place of work during your time at Beacon. You shall arrive here in the morning, grab your equipment and uniform, and then proceed to do rounds around the building. More detailed information shall be provided to you via the Scroll among your equipment."
Now that got me out of my funk of being terrified. My own Scroll! The one thing I thought I'd never get while I was stuck here due to low funds.
I mean, why wouldn't I be excited? Putting aside the fact that it is literally a smart phone made with far more advanced technology, there's also all the information I could look up! I mean a library is useful and all for historical information, but not about recent trends or news.
With a Scroll I would be able to access this world's version of the internet, and with that all the recent news, trends, and events that a library wouldn't have. Not to mention the fact that I'd finally be able to read fanfiction again!
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What? I missed reading cheesy fanfiction okay! It sucks that I wasn't able to read any RWBY fanfiction anymore (for obvious reasons), but surely I could read other kinds of fanfiction right? This world had stuff like Pokémon and even Halo (saw a few games for sale at a store I went to for Foxy) so surely there was fanfiction!
Look I know it's pathetic but let a man have something for once in a world were literally none of his past hobbies exist, or are even accessible to him.
Anyway, with a wide smile on my face I began to open the door for the Maintenance Room, but it was rudely slammed shut thanks to some strange unseen force.
Oh right. She hasn't lectured/threatened me yet, I thought wearily as I turned around.
Sure enough Goodwitch was glaring at me with her little riding crop slightly pointed at the door.
I would have groaned in annoyance if it weren't for the terrifying look she was giving me.
"Now I don't mean to be rude Mr. Sullivan, but I must remind you that you are now a part of Beacon's staff. While your position in it is not so noteworthy as a teacher, it still is a part of Beacon. You now represent Beacon, and with that you should make sure not to do anything that will damage our school's reputation. That includes making remarks against your fellow faculty. Do I make myself clear?"
I shook my head up and down as fast as I could to avoid Goodwitch's wrath. I did not feel like being thrown out of a window thank you very much!
My panicking nod must have been enough for her as she nodded and left. It would take a few more seconds after that before I let out a sigh of relief for not being flung around like a ragdoll.
However, in the midst of my relief a voice spoke behind me,
"Dang man! First day on the job and you're already on Goodwitch's shit list. Tough break man."
Ah, now there was a voice that I did not want to hear…Funny how that kept happening in the span of a few hours. I kept a calm expression while panicking on the inside as I turned around to face the owner of that voice.
Now while she might have looked like an average tanned skin burnet woman with blue eyes wearing a Beacon janitor jumpsuit, in reality she was everyone's favorite illusionist, Emerald.
How did I know? I recognized her voice. I'd watched the show so many times, I'd know her voice actor anywhere. So even though she had an illusion up making her look different, I recognized her.
So yeah, there she was in all her fake glory. She had a cocky smile but I couldn't tell if she was faking it or was actually amused that I got lectured.
Probably the latter.
I decided it would be best not to make a scene and alert Emerald that I knew who she was.
"I'm sure she was just stressed about something and me annoying her just got her extra mad. I'm sure she won't be that bad next time," I replied scratching the back of my neck nervously.
Emerald just chuckled in a way that screamed 'oh you poor fool' before she said,
"Whatever you say man. Anyway the name's Zatanna , nice to meet you."
Ignoring the fact that Emeralds alias was one of DC's most well know magicians, as well as the irony with it, I shook her hand.
"Name's Chris, and before you ask no I am not a hobo. I just so happen to be low on funds and can't afford to buy any clothes or food at the moment."
Emerald snickered at my intro as the hand shake came to an end.
"Wasn't even gonna ask. Anyway I gotta go, some kid decided to empty his breakfast and I'm the lucky gal who has to clean it. See ya around."
With that Emerald left with a mop and bucket in hand.
I made sure to wait till she was completely out of view before I let out a sigh of relief.
"Should have known Cinder's lackies would be here too. I swear if I find out Mercury is a mechanic here I'll…"
I grumbled about this for a good few minutes before I just sighed again and entered the Maintenance Room.
}Line Break{
Now you're all probably wondering why I wasn't freaking out as much as I did when I ran into Emerald like I did with Cinder. Well, besides the obvious point of how Emerald is nowhere near as dangerous as Cinder is, around her I could worry less about dying… at least from fire that is.
It's like I said, I figured her two lackies would be here too. Cinder always had them with her on the show, so it made sense. So I prepared myself to not freak out as much as before if I ran into them. Luckily for me Cinder only brought Emerald with her, which meant no robo-legged assassin to deal with.
Though I have to say, the way Cinder and Emerald got in was brilliant. Cinder managed to make sure there was no direct connection between either of them. If one of them got caught then the other wouldn't draw suspicion on to them via association.
Sadly this also meant I couldn't 'find' any evidence to get both of them kicked out, or better, arrested without the other coming after me.
Anyway, that's enough of that. It's time I tell you all the wonders of the Maintenance room.
Now while the Maintenance room itself looked like any normal one from Earth, with your standard shelves with supplies, tables to work on repairs, and a little workshop area, it also had plenty of Remnant add-ons.
There were piles upon piles of dust containers, ammo bags and even some first aid supplies. The workshop was equipped with weapon cleaning tools, even more dust containers, and some robot maintenance guide books.
The last one did cause me to raise my brow, since I had no experience with robotics and I doubt any other janitor did. But I just assumed that this was set there for the actual mechanics to fix up any training bots they had here.
There were also bookshelves stocked to the brim with books on how to properly dispose of dust, how to treat minor and major wounds, and even a Grimm encyclopedia!
Needless to say, I spent a lot of my break time reading and memorizing them.
Anyway, after I was done with exploring the room I found my janitor jumpsuit waiting for me at the back of the room in a locker with my name on it. The jumpsuit also had my last name on a nametag.
At the bottom of the locker was my Scroll, but sadly it was pretty much just like an Iphone but with holograms…and this could be folded.
Holograms are cool and all, but I was expecting…more.
After that I took off my hoodie (woulda be kinda stuffy wearing a jumpsuit over it after all) and put the jumpsuit on.
"Wait a second…why did Ozpin make a suit in my size with a nametag on it along with a locker if he didn't know I would take the job or not? Unless…"
There was a good couple seconds of silence before I shouted, apparently loud enough for the whole school to hear,
"OH OZPIN YOU MINIPULATIVE SON OF A BITCH!"
I swore I could feel his amused smirk from all the way in his office.
Also, I ended up getting another lecture from Goodwitch, which was so much fun.
That was sarcasm if you couldn't tell.
But that came later. While I grumbled, I looked at my scroll for the info Goodwitch said would be there. Sure enough, I found out that I would come in during the morning and work till a good three hours after classes were left out. I could work overtime for more pay if I wanted to.
I would be patrolling the different parts of the school with a janitor cart and instead of being called via a walkie talkie or the intercoms, the teachers would send a message to my scroll about any mess that occurred.
There were a few more legal things in there, but I don't want to bore you guys with all the details.
After putting my Steam pellets and scroll into the jumpsuit pockets, I rolled out a janitors dolly after adding a few…extra things to the normal stuff on it and left the Maintenance Room.
Sadly, while I hoped I wouldn't run into anymore main characters that day, my first clean up duty ended up with me having to deal with everybody's favorite bully, along with Vomit Bo-I mean Jaune and his team.
…
…
…
And before you ask, yes. I did make Cardin look like a idiot, And boy did I enjoy the hell out of it.
}Episode End{
Ah, nothing like putting Chris through the most awkward of situations. Meeting one of the most dangerous criminals alive and dealing with Ozpin's trollyness is just the tip of the iceberg.
How'd you all like the new formatting? Looks rather professional if you ask me.
Also, yes the reference to Le MAO XXIII's self-insert fic My Turn is a shameless plugin for the author and I decided to add it in on my own choice. It's a really good read, as well as really funny. I'd recommend you guys check it out.
Anyway, time to call some of ya out!
For the person who pm'd me, you know who you all, I figured you did so to remain anonymous or something. But thanks for the video, and the wonderful idea. Trust me when I say it will be put to use.
kirby163: It was explained that he was just doing it to get the others annoyed, but there may be another reason. Who knows?
.9847: Maybe he will, maybe he won't. The answer will be reveled in due time…or he might not get it at all. We'll just have to wait and see
Guest: That, embarrassingly, was my fault. I somehow got it into my head that her name was Cinder Falls. I have no idea where that s at the end of Fall came from. So…yeah hehehehe…
Anyway, sorry for any grammar/spelling mistakes, please let me know of them so I can fix them.
All logic used in this fic is completely head-canon. If you don't agree that's okay, it's just how I see things
Thank you all for following and faving! We're almost at 100 follows and we've passed 50 favorites! Thanks a lot.
Welp, with that all done this has been LightDusk16 signing off!
P.S Look out for a new RWBY fic soon, need some feedback on the idea of it!