Chapter 12: Catch a Falling Clown

Hi everyone, thank you for your messages and reviews. Today is my birthday, so happy birthday to me, as a gift to all of us I am uploading the final two chapters today. This chapter's title comes from a book by Stuart M. Kaminsky.

It was a beautiful night. The stars were blazing in the dark sky, it wasn't cold out and everyone who came towards me seemed happy and full of anticipation. Or maybe that was just me.

"Hailey." I said into the phone. "I'm ok. I'm sorry I was such a bad friend. But believe me, everything will be fine. I wish I could have talked to you in person one last time, but I guess this is it." I paused looking for something inside of me that still connected me to her, that would make me miss her. "Love ya, Hailey-Baby." I laughed at that because I sounded just like her.

I threw the phone on the ground, relishing the smashing sound it made as it blew apart on the street. I laughed again, loosening my pony-talil and walking on towards the ACE chemical plant.

I felt so free, I hadn't felt this good in a long time.

There were no guards, no security and I wondered if Mr. J owned this place just as he had owned Gotham's night life and Arkham Asylum. Was there anything he couldn't do? "Mr. J?" I called out, my voice echoing in the large, empty space. I wasn't afraid. Once and for all I was done with being scared.

"Harley?" His voice made me giggle and it came from deep down within me. "I'm coming, Puddin'!" I heard his answering chuckle and blushed at the implication of my words.
He was up high on the highest platform, overseeing the entire chemical plant.

Of course he would be high up, I thought as I began to climb the ladder.

Once safely on the platform we stood facing each other taking in the moment. This was it after all. This was the moment we could finally be who we really were. I ran towards him, overwhelmed by the sudden urge to be close to him. He caught me in his arms, spinning me around in a circle and laughing gleefully.

"I can't believe you're here!" He set me down, cupping my face in his hands lovingly. "I didn't expect you to show up here the first night."
The joy in his eyes was so evident and real I felt like crying. I kissed him with everything I had, because I had nothing without him anymore, because he was my everything. He kissed me back with the same passionate sentiment, clearly feeling the same as I.

A part of me, the part that was called Harleen and had become smaller and quieter these past few months, was thinking of terms like toxicity or codependency. But she soon melted into his arms as well, finally giving in to his touch. I almost tore his shirt in my haste to be close to him, which made him chuckle. I in turn giggled as we crashed onto the ground of the platform.

However soon after that neither of us were laughing.

I didn't comment on his tattoos, he didn't comment the scar from my accident. We didn't need to talk about the scar any more and we had all the time in the world for him to explain every inch of his skin to me.

Afterwards I lay in his arms, my head on his shoulder, my face hidden against his neck. Mr. J ran his hand through my hair, twirling the blonde curls affectionately.

"What happened?" He asked and I knew exactly what he was talking about. I told him about Hailey, how she had stopped returning my calls, had stopped supporting my feelings for him, after forcing me to accept them.

When I told him about the conversation I'd overheard I felt him tense underneath me with rage. But I didn't care anymore. I couldn't believe I'd been so upset about what Dr. Arkham and Dr. Leland thought of me.

"We could kill 'em." Mr. J muttered and I laughed.

"It's not worth it."

"You're worth it." He growled. "They had no right to treat you that way."

"I'm over it." I smiled against his skin.

"I can't believe that bitch called you rotten."

Now I laughed. "Hey, we're rotten and damaged. It's perfect."

He chuckled, kissing my head. "Who gave you the note?"

His question surprised me. "A cleaning lady."

"Hilda." He filled in the blanks and sounded thoughtful. "I gave every contact a note and told them to make sure you got the message every day." I heard him smile. "I didn't think you'd come on the first day."

"But how would you have known if I was going to come or not?" Mr. J stopped twirling my hair and pulled me closer, leaning his head against mine. "I was going to come here every night and wait." He sounded thoughtful, wistful even. "Imagine not knowing if tonight would finally be the night." The fact that this romantic gesture surprised me was embarrassing to me, so I asked:

"How many contacts do you have at Arkham?" He genuinely laughed at this.

"Harley, I won't tell you all of my secrets right now." I smiled too and closed my eyes, enjoying his presence and the feeling of finally being where I belonged. We lay there in silence, until I whispered:

"Question." He turned his head and I moved so that we could look into each others eyes. He stroked my arm to signal he was listening.

"Would you die for me?" I asked.

"Yes." He said in an instant without hesitation.

"That's too easy." I realized and stared up at the darkness. "Would you..."Yes. I thought as the true question hit me, and turned my gate back to him. "Would you live for me?"

He was quiet. For too long so I pondered:

"Hm?"

"Yes."He said.

"Careful." I pushed my finger against his lips gently. "Do not say this oath thoughtlessly."

I couldn't deal with it again. Another heart break, another man walking out on me, another dream dissolving in front of my eyes. I couldn't take it.
"Desire becomes surrender." He whispered as if realizing this right now. "Surrender becomes power."

"You want this?" I asked holding my breath with anticipation. Needing his appreciation more than anything else in the world.

"I do." He whispered back and kissed me deeply.

I do. I thought and giggled into the kiss. I do, Mr. J. We got dressed in silence. We both knew what was coming, we hadn't needed to talk about it. As I stared down into the bubbling, steaming chemicals I wondered if it would hurt. It didn't matter, it would be worth it. He had promised to live for me and I would fall for him. His shirt actually was ripped and he pulled on his leather jacket in one swift movement. He stood beside me and looked down at the place that had created him and would soon create me. Bye-bye Harley-Baby! I could hear Hailey's voice in my head and smiled, pressing against the side of my head.

"What are you smiling at?" The Joker asked and I turned to look at him.

"My friend Hailey." I said. "I really think she'd be happy for us. Despite everything."

"Oh Harley." He shook his head and gave me the sweetest smile. "You still don't get it, do you?"

My confusion caused him to laugh, not loudly and not in a mean way. More like how one would laugh at a one year old just because she was adorable.

"Hailey, the friend you have never actually seen?" He stepped closer soundlessly, like a mythical creature at night time. "The one who suddenly appeared in your life after a traumatic experience? The one no one else has ever spoken to, but you?" I stared at him speechless, as I realized what he was saying. He reached out to wipe away a single tear that had escaped my eye. "The one who basically shares your name and that adorable accent that escapes from your lips every now and then?"

"She's not real." I whispered and remembered how Hailey herself had tried to tell me this, what had she said that had freaked her out so much? That she hadn't realized how real things were?

"Nope." He grinned.

"She's...she's me?"

"Isn't the human mind amazing?" He chuckled, leaning his forehead against mine. "Such an extraordinary mess it can make of things."

I laughed louder than ever before and he laughed with me.

"They were right." I realized as tears of laughter streamed down my face. "I am a terrible therapist!"

The Joker laughed and then Harleen Quinzel threw herself into a vat of burning chemicals. Halfway down she remembered that she couldn't swim which made her laugh hysterically. The Joker dove after her. He hesitated only for a second, but remembered his feelings for her. The actual benefit her presence had in his life. The woman who emerged from the chemicals was no longer Harleen Quinzel.
She was Harley Quinn and she was everything and more he could have imagined or wished for. He had always seen something in her that everyone at Arkham had failed to acknowledge. He had seen her when no one else had. She breathed in deeply and melted in his arms the same way their clothing melted in the chemicals. Bleached and pale, with colored hair due to their clothing she clung to him as if she were scared to drown.

He kissed her as if he was the one drowning, as if kissing her was coming up for fresh air. As if he needed to kiss her, just to survive in this broken world.

The End.

Thanks everyone for reading! What do you think of this ending and Hailey? Stay tuned for the epilogue :)