Believe Again: Little Annoyances
The sound of the keys on the keyboard clacking away and his quiet breathing was all that filled the room. His eyes were glued onto the computer screen, filtering out the information that he needed. He was rusty, the feel of the keys unfamiliar to his stiff fingers that had not touched it in ages. He had even found a thin sheet of dust settled over the keyboard and screen when he first laid his eyes on his computer again.
And to think he promised himself that he would never go back to this again... His fingers paused from their movements, and then the room became silent again, except for the long sigh that he released as he hung his head low.
What was he even doing?
His eyes flitted over to the open notebook lying on his desk. The information he had gathered in the past hour had been written down neatly on its clean white pages in bullet points. If it were him in the past, he would have collected much more in half the time he was taking now. If his brother were to see him...
He rolled his eyes at the thought. Saeyoung always thought he was all that just because he was the better hacker.
Not that it was a competition anyway. He wasn't a hacker anymore. He was simply borrowing the skills he had learnt to find out more about... her.
Her name echoed in his mind, and he could already feel the syllables rolling off his tongue, though he did not say it aloud. Almost as if her name was too precious, too pure to be tainted by his corrupt lips. That, and he wouldn't want to risk having Saeyoung overhearing or something. His brother had all sorts of tricks up his sleeve and he would not have Saeyoung poking his nose into this.
Saeran glanced out the window just beside his desk where he was situated. Through the clear glass, crystal daylight filtered in to rest on his face. The sky was clear today, with only the thinnest and barest streaks of white adorning it in the far distance. It would be nice to go out to the park about now. It was already 6.28pm according to the digital clock on his desk.
His eyes turned back to the computer screen that was currently cluttered with numerous open files and windows. There was still so much left to do, so much left to find out about her. She was strange, a woman unlike any other he had seen before. Of course, there was MC, the only woman he knew who could stand being with Saeyoung, but that was beside the point.
She was common, just a normal woman who would walk past him every day in the evenings as she headed back home, blocking his view of the sky for just two seconds as she went on her way. He didn't know when she first noticed him. Nor did he know who started noticing first.
All he knew was that the first time he tore his eyes away from the sky to look at her, she had been standing there, her figure small from the distance between them, looking at him too.
She was different. That much he could tell, even though he never interacted much with people. He never felt the need to, nor did he wish to. With strangers you could never tell what they were thinking behind the smile they wore, or the frowns on their faces as they spoke to you. Human were conniving, deceitful creatures that couldn't be trusted, except maybe for a select few.
The only people he could trust were his brother, MC and the RFA members. Perfectly logical, given all that they had done for him, despite his background and past actions.
But, for her? It was both scary and intriguing how he could feel so comfortable around her, even when he barely knew anything about her. There was just a quality in her that he had never found in anyone else, in the way she would wordlessly lock gazes with him, observe him, attentively note every single detail about him, to the point where he didn't know if he should be impressed or repelled. It made him feel vulnerable beneath her gaze, as if it could penetrate his very being.
There was also the fact that she didn't expect a conversation from him. Most people did. They would ask him questions, or expect him to initiate something just so it wouldn't be awkward. But it seemed enough for her to sit next to him and admire the same view of the sky as he did. Oddly enough, he didn't feel awkward around her. In fact, she was pleasant to be with. Certainly, she was a curious person, one who always seemed to have many questions behind her wide eyes as she stared at him. The only thing was that she never showed it very much.
He supposed... they might be somewhat similar.
She was an enigma of sorts. Different, unique, alien, special. He wanted to know more, understand more about her. Find out who she was exactly. He wanted to ensure that she was someone who could be trusted without a doubt. Hence, the reason for his research.
Saeran glanced downwards to the table to where his notebook was... no— should have been.
With a jump he became alerted to the presence of another in his room. The person must have intruded while he had been lost in his thoughts. Great. Since when had his senses dulled to this extent?
In a flash he was off his chair and reaching out to swipe the notebook from the thief's hand. "Give it back!"
He ducked the notebook out of reach swiftly, causing Saeran's hand to swipe at the air. "Saeran, you're checking up on someone? And it's a girl?" The redhead asked nonchalantly as he glossed over the contents of the notebook and began reading it out.
"Basic information... Name, age, address... Oh, there's a photo too. She's pretty cute..."
"You idiot! Give it back!" the younger of the two shouted, still trying to wrestle the notebook out of his older brother's grip.
"Hey, that's a mean thing to say about your older brother," Saeyoung chided with an impish laugh. "Who's this? Your girlfrien— Guahh!"
In the next moment, Saeran tackled his brother to the ground and gave him a hard punch to the chest for good measure before snatching the notebook away. Its pages were now crumpled, much to his annoyance. "Get out of my room!"
"Aww, come on, Saeran," Saeyoung pouted, wincing as he got up from the floor and rubbed the new sore spot on his chest, "I wanna know! Who's that girl? How did you get to know her? Are you interested in—"
"Stop asking—"
"—someone? Don't tell me, you've been going out every evening to see her?"
"Saeyoung, I swear—"
"Oh my Elly this is so romantic! Saeran, why didn't you tell me?"
"Shut up and get the hell out of here," he threatened through gritted teeth, "before I tell MC about how your new robot cat burnt half of the couch—"
"W-Wait!" Saeyoung started, slapping his hand over his brother's mouth. "Sorry sorry sorry please don't tell her I promise I won't ask anymore!"
Saeran narrowed his eyes. As if he couldn't tell what his brother's next move would be. "You better not try to look up information about her on your own," he warned. If there was anything he particularly hated about Saeyoung, it was his insatiable curiosity towards anything related to him.
"But if we work together we could get more info— Ah, ah, okay, okay, I get it. I'll stop. I won't do anything, I promise. You can stop glaring now. Don't get so mad."
"...You'd better."
"But, you know, there's no need to by shy if it's a girl you like. It's a good age for you to get a girlfriend, anyway."
Saeran groaned. That was enough of Saeyoung's nonsense for one day. All this noise was starting to make his head hurt. Hastily, he closed the notebook and placed it in the drawer under his desk. He then proceeded to save his files as quickly as he could so he could shut his computer down. "Quit jumping to your own conclusions. Did you come in just so you could snoop around?"
"Ah, nope, nope," Saeyoung smiled, pushing his glasses up his nose bridge. "MC and I are making steak for dinner, so we wanted to know if you would like yours cat-shaped or heart-shaped."
Saeran's eye twitched. What kind of... They were impossible, really. "Save that for yourselves."
Saeyoung's protests trailed behind him as he trudged out of the room. "But Saeran, I'm gonna pour out my heart and soul into this meal..."
"Yeah right. MC always does most of the work because you can't cook to save a life," Saeran muttered with an eye roll. They arrived at the living room where the dining table was. MC was there, wearing a bright pink apron with a giant Longcat icon stamped in the middle of it. She was having a short break, sipping on a drink, and she perked up when she noticed the two brothers approaching.
"I heard some noise earlier. Is everything okay?"
"Yes, honey, everything's fine. Saeran was just telling me he wanted some heart-shaped steak."
"I didn't—"
"Oh, that's great," MC beamed. "I was worried that you wouldn't like my suggestions." Saeran's protests promptly died on his tongue. MC was a nice person, and he didn't want to upset her since she was the one cooking for them. He shot his brother a sharp glare which Saeyoung pretended not to see. Instead, the jolly redhead went prancing towards his wife and helped to remove some sauce stains on her cheek, starting a new subject that sounded like it would become disgustingly cheesy in T-minus 9.58 seconds.
Saeran let out a sigh. He supposed this was his cue to leave the couple alone for a while. "You guys can go ahead first. I'll eat when I get back," he said as he headed towards the front door.
"Huh?" MC spoke up. "Aren't you eating with us today?"
"It depends."
"But Saeran—" Saeyoung began. It only made the man pick up his walking pace. He wasn't about to stay and deal with any more of his brother's idiocy. "Bye." Before they could say anything else, he shut the front door behind him.
The park was a little noisier than usual, as it always was on a Friday night. With his hands in the pockets of his jeans, he walked past children playing in the sandbox of the playground, young couples taking a stroll with their hands tightly interlocked, elderly folk idly seated on benches or doing some group exercises in one of the larger pavilions.
It didn't take long for him to locate the bench that he usually sat at. It was in the quietest corner of the park, shied away from the lively chorus of laughter and background conversations amongst other park-goers. Only the occasional runner or passer-by would come by here.
Speaking of which, he wondered when she would be coming today. He took his spot to the right of the bench as he checked his phone for the time. 6.53pm. She was a little late today. He glanced towards his left, noting the emptiness of the bench. It unnerved him somewhat, that her absence could make him feel bothered, if only vaguely.
Would she come today? She hadn't come yesterday, which had made him feel an overwhelming anxiety for the first time in a very, very long time. Recalling those days that passed with something similar to this, the days when he would peek out through the thick curtains draped over the windows in his old house to catch the smallest glimpse of the sky out here, waiting for his brother to return, made his heart clench.
He never thought he would ever have to feel this way again. Not when he was finally free, to stay out here for as long as he wished, to savor the taste of ice cream on his tongue anytime he wanted, found a place he could belong. For good.
She was dangerous, without a doubt. He didn't like it at all that her absence could make the worst possible scenarios run through his twisted head, and make him feel so sick with worry that it was difficult to breathe.
And yet, he couldn't find it in him to run away from her. Each time he gazed into her eyes, or made the slightest physical contact, he felt like he was being sucked into a black hole. Perhaps she was a witch, who had cast some sort of spell on him. She must have done something to him. There was no other reason for his abnormal, irrational behaviour.
Their conversation from the day before rang in his ears. She would stop coming here the day he did? He released a small exhale. What a thing to say. She was strange, alright. But, he did find himself wondering when that would be.
Perhaps... it would be the day his reason became identical to hers.
Just then, he felt his phone buzzing in his pocket. He ignored it initially, having yet to observe the sky for the day. The sky was a pale blue as the sun peeked out from behind some tall trees in the distance. A peachy tint lined the thin grayish purple clouds divided sparsely across the largely empty sky. They looked like the gummy snakes that Saeyoung had gotten him just a few days back as a treat, albeit much less colorful.
What would it be like to live up there? Did souls go there after death? Was heaven hidden by an invisible sphere somewhere behind the clouds too?
...Was V living up there too?
He trained his gaze intently at the sky, hoping it would give him some kind of answer.
As always, it didn't.
Another long vibration from his phone caused him to snap back to reality. What was going on? He pulled out his phone, intending to mute it altogether, when the next few message notifications from a new chatroom caught his eye.
Yoosung: OMG. IS THIS TRUE?
Zen: Are you serious? Wait, this is Saeran you're talking about right?
Yoosung: SAEYOUNG HURRY UP AND ANSWER US
Saeran could feel irritation welling up in him already. The mention of his name in the chatroom was making him dread seeing what kind of gossip his brother had decided to spread about him.
Reluctantly, he entered the chatroom, mentally preparing himself for the major fuse that would likely blow, considering that his brother was involved.
[Saeran has entered the chatroom.]
Zen: Oh, he's here.
Yoosung: SAERAN
Yoosung: SDKFLWOIESDNF;;
Saeran: What did Saeyoung say now.
Zen: He's saying that you got a girlfriend without telling any of us... but he's kidding, right?
Zen: I mean, there's no way you would get a girl before me, right?
Yoosung: Saeran, how could you leave us behind! HOW COULD YOU
Saeran: ...
Saeran: Saeyoung, I'm giving you three seconds to confess and repent. Otherwise I'm telling MC.
Saeran: 1
Saeran: 2
Saeyoung: SAERAN NO
Saeran: 3
Saeyoung: S
Saeyoung: O
Saeyoung: R
Saeyoung: R
Saeran: Talk.
Saeyoung: Y
Zen: Lolololol he's pissed. You're in so much trouble now.
Yoosung: Who cares about that?! Saeran, is it true that you got a girlfriend? Without telling us?
Saeran: Of course not. Why would you believe anything my brother says? He's just talking nonsense like he usually does.
Saeyoung: I have evidence
Saeyoung: To prove
Saeyoung: that Saeran is seeing someone
Saeyoung: 1. Every evening, he goes out to the park
Saeran: Stop
Saeyoung: and spends an abnormal amount of time there. 1.4720 hours, on average, to be exact.
Zen: Hmm... that does sound suspicious.
Yoosung: Yeah... There's nothing much to do at a park.
Saeyoung: 2. He has turned into a stalker.
Zen: Omg lolololololol
Zen: Are you serious?
Zen: What, did you hack to find information about the girl?
Saeran: We had a deal.
Saeran: I knew I couldn't trust you.
Saeyoung: I only promised not to hack to find out information about her. Didn't say I wouldn't tell the members so they can snoop around for me.
Zen: ...Wait.
Zen: Wait wait wait
Zen: You seriously did? You actually hacked to find information about her?
Yoosung: O_O Saeran did you really
Saeran: I did not.
Saeyoung: Liar, I found your notebook~
Yoosung: WHAT'S IN IT
Saeyoung: Can't say. Classifed information.
Saeran: ...
Saeran: MC and I are going to have a serious talk later.
Saeyoung: WAhT
Saeyoung: But I
Saeyoung: didan't sayg anywething
Saeran: :)
Saeyoung: PLEESAE
[Saeran has left the chatroom]
He muted his phone with a huff, trying to take deep breaths to calm himself down. That idiot... He was really asking for a beating. Talk about an annoying brother to ruin what would have otherwise been a pleasant Friday evening.
Right, he was supposed to get ice cream today. He had completely forgotten about that. He had better hurry to go get it before she arrived.
So without wasting another second he stuffed his phone back in his pocket as he got to his feet. The moment he glanced up however, his body froze, his feet rooted to the ground and his breath caught in his throat.
Because there she was, standing a couple of steps away from him, with two ice cream cones in hand, looking rather amused at his unusually worked up state. He felt his face flush as he hastily looked away, embarrassed that she had caught him in such an unguarded state. And he couldn't even plaster on a poker face now.
...He was so making Saeyoung pay for this.
A/N: I may have gone overboard with the chatroom but that was just too fun HAHAHA. (I hope I'm not the only one laughing o dear sorry for my poor sense of humor guys.)
Hope you liked this chapter :D