You Are the One I've Been Waiting For All of My Life
Rifiuto: Non Mirena
Summary: Two years after losing the human part of her in Ahtohallan, Elsa is content in the Enchanted Forest; as content as she can be. But her contentment starts to change when a man stumbles into the Northuldra, hurt, with a connection to Elsa, and a secret. And suddenly, Elsa finds herself questioning not only her past actions, but her very heart. Elsa/Hans. Written: 2019.
A/N: So, last year, Zani and I took the kids to see Frozen II. BIG mistake. It's Zani's new favourite film. I'm sure you've already see 'Into the Unknown', which is- I want to say a warm up story (the last two chapters need major editing, which is why I haven't posted them yet). It was the first piece she's written- like, of actual fan fiction written- in years, which was huge for her. Like she actually sat down and wrote. And sure, it's not her best, and it's really rushed, but it shows my sister-in-law still has a love of writing and that she's slowly starting to get back to what she loves, which is wonderful, because we've been worried she'd decided to stop writing stories for good.
So, this story... it delves into something new for her, pairing-wise- Hans and Elsa. I know, I know, you've seen it all before, but she's taking a semi- interesting spin on it. She draws on Wicca (specifically elemen6talist) as well as Norse mythology, some Irish/Gaelic mythology, a touch of alchemy, philosophy, literature and just a pinch of history to make this story as well-rounded as possible, building on the world Frozen/Frozen II gives us. That includes the theories that the voice Elsa heard was her own, a twist on the death theory, reincarnation and past lives, as well as drawing on some of the Elsa from Once Upon A Time, and a deeper look at the five- yes, five- elements.
I will try to upload a chapter a day (be warned, there's a lot and they're long), sometimes more than one a day. Oh, also, just an insight into how much my darling sister-in-law connects with this movie, especially the music? She wrote this entire fic in TWO DAYS.
The Ancient Greeks believed in four main elements- fire, earth, air and water. But there was one more, one forgotten to time, despite Aristotle's many writings on it.
Aether
That which builds the heavens and their corresponding bodies; others called it the Spirit, which bridges the gap between the natural, elemental world and the physical. Not Death, but something else, unexplainable and uncategorizable. It not only encompasses all, but is a part of all it encompasses. It rules over the other elements, keeping and often restoring the balance among them.
It is the bridge.
It has gone by many names over the centuries- the Soul, the Fifth Element, Aether, Akasha, the Quintessence, the Fifth Spirit.
Now, though?
Now, it went by Elsa.
The stream was cool against her toes as she dangled them in the water, sitting atop a flat rock on the embankment above the stream. Her light grey flats sat beside her, and the watteau cape she wore had been removed and laid with them. The long skirt of her dress fluttered in the breeze. Her heeled boots were back in her hut; technically, she didn't need the boots, but Elsa liked her comforts, the boots being one of them. There were just days where she couldn't stand flats or going barefoot.
She sighed, leaning back against her hands and tilting her face to the sun, her thoughts wandering. In the two years since she'd discovered who she truly was- the Fifth Spirit, the one who tamed and commanded the other four, who was the balance- things had settled down, especially after her death.
A moment passed, and she wrinkled her nose. Was it a death? Had she truly died? In theory, when she'd dove down into the depths of Ahtohallan that day, her physical body had frozen to death. She'd managed to get a message to her sister, about what really happened, and how their grandfather was ultimately responsible for the Enchanted Forest being locked in fog for nearly forty years. Anna, who'd received the message, had managed to destroy the dam and free the forest. Once the dam had been destroyed, she'd unfrozen and returned.
But again, was it death? She would say it had been, for she had felt the stopping of her heart, but then again. Could it have been possible reincarnation? She didn't feel dead, and her sister was able to touch her, hug her, as were the people of Arendelle and the Northuldra. So, in essence, had she really died? Hard to say, not that she wanted to ponder it now. She had saved Arendelle from being flooded, and her death- whether it was truly death or not- had laid way for Anna to take the throne. Her sister and Kristoff were keeping their engagement, until Anna was well and truly settled in as Queen.
She had done much for Arendelle in her four years as queen, despite her a0ccidental Winter; her focus had been on strengthening allegiances with their allies, increasing trade and focusing on the safety and well-being of her people. Her country and her people had come first. Which is why it still baffled her that the people of Arendelle still referred to her as Queen, despite her two years away in the Enchanted Forest.
Anna had told her it was because while she herself was loved by the people, in her and Arendelle's mind, Elsa was the true queen. She had been groomed to be queen from an early age; she was the Crown Princess, the rule would go to her upon their parents' deaths. Anna may have been the current queen, but Elsa was the true queen in the eyes of the people of Arendelle. She had been Iduna and Agnarr's first child, a gift from the spirits to her parents for her mother's selfless bravery when she saved Agnarr after war broke out between the Arendelle soldiers and the Northulda, Iduna's people.
"You are a gift. Her good deed was rewarded with you."
Her eyes opened briefly as her sister's words from that long ago day came rushing back, and after a moment, she waved the memory away, closing her eyes once again. While she may have been a gift, born on the Winter Solstice, she had still be their heir, and her father had taught her well- history, philosophy, psychology, economics, linguistics, mathematics, so that she would be a well rounded ruler when the time came.
"A good ruler must know enough to rule and lead her people wisely, and still be willing and continue to learn. You are exceptionally brilliant, and will be a wise and knowledgeable queen someday, my little Lisbet."
Her father had been right, she realized. In the short four years that constituted her reign, she had quickly gained the title of the Philosopher-Queen, for her tendencies to turn towards the teachings of the past, the great teachers; Aristotle, Plato, Socrates and the like were best turned to in times of great stress for the young queen. She knew several languages, had a gift for economics and a deep love of literature and history. Most of it had been cultivated during her years of isolation, for her mother had left books for her outside her door, knowing of Elsa's desperate thirst for knowledge. Though the first year after the Great Thaw had been rough, she had turned to her father's teachings, and they had helped her. Despite their mistakes, they had done all they could to prepare their daughter for the crown, and it had paid off.
The breeze picked up, and she chuckled, not opening her eyes. "Hi Gale. How's your day been?" The wind spirit continued to ruffle the ends of her dress and hair, and she snorted softly. "Not today, just... enjoying the sunshine. I so very rarely get days like this anymore." It had been a while since she'd had time to herself, for she was constantly keeping the balance between the other four elements. Today, she just wanted to relax and enjoy the sun.
The breeze was warm against her cool skin, and she sighed, settling back on her elbows. Her powers had continued to grow, but it was getting easier to control now that she knew her true place in the world. "See you, Gale." The wind spirit disappeared, and she relaxed again, letting herself lay back against the warm, smooth rock. Her feet still dangled in the stream, and she let herself slowly drift between consciousness and unconsciousness.
A soft melody floated on the breeze, and she shifted. Minutes passed, with the rustling of the leaves and the soft songs of the birds-
And then she heard it again, that familiar melody.
Her blue eyes snapped open, and she sat up, listening. She heard nothing, and chalked it up to a couple birds. But just as she was about to lay back down, she heard it again, and stopped.
It was the same melody that had called to her two years earlier in Arendelle- her mother's voice, mimicked by the North wind. Or, perhaps, the small voice in her head had suggested, it wasn't her mother's voice at all, but her own. The part of her that was waiting to be set free- the Fifth Spirit. It was a theory that had crossed her mind multiple times over the last three years or so, but she'd never bothered to go any further than let it sit in her head, especially after her experience in Ahtohallan.
It called again, and slowly, she stood, stepping out of the stream and collecting her shoes and cape. Two years had passed since she'd heard the voice, and she figured she'd never hear it again, so to hear it now-
No, it's not the voice. It's just a ringing in your ear.
As she made her way back to the Northuldra, it called to her again, and she stopped. No, just block it out. It's like the mythical sirens, who used to lure sailors into the depths of the sea. That's all it is.
When she reached the camp, she nodded to Honeymaren and Ryder, who were talking with a few others. Calls of "Good afternoon, Spirit", "How has your day been, Spirit?", and "Welcome back, Spirit", greeted her, and she acknowledged them each with a nod, making her way towards her hut, which sat further back from the rest. Once inside, she set her things down and settled on the bedroll and blankets, pulling out the scarf that had belonged to her mother from underneath the blankets. She had insisted they all call her Elsa, but very few did; Honeymaren and Ryder and a most of the younger generation would, even Yelena, the chief of the tribe, but the majority still called her Spirit. Without a word, she wrapped the scarf around her shoulders, brushing the fabric against her cheek.
It was moments like this, when she could be safely tucked into her hut- or in the ice palace she'd made on Ahtohollan- whenever she returned from being out and about that she felt the loneliness the most. She missed Anna dearly, and even though there were still family game nights, family dinners and visits, it wasn't the same as living there, where she got to see her sister every day. Just when they'd reconnected and gotten to a good place, a strong place, they'd been ripped apart again.
The voice called out again, and she looked up. It was stronger this time; to the point where it was resonating beneath her skin, similar to her magic. She tried to ignore it, but then something struck her, something deep in the pit of her stomach. It was strong, unnerving.
With the scarf still about her shoulders, she slipped on her flats and stepped out of the hut, looking around. Again, the voice called to her, and after a moment, she moved through the camp, looking around. "Is there something you need, Spirit?" She turned to find Yelena behind her, and after a moment, she shook her head.
"No thank you, Yele-"
It called again to her, and she caught her breath. Yelena, noticing the hitch in her throat and the widening of her eyes,0 stepped closer, laying a hand on her shoulder. "Elsa, what is it?" The girl didn't notice the older woman's tender gesture, she simply glanced the chief before pulling away and hurrying to the edge of the camp. Honeymaren looked up from her conversation with one of the other women.
"Elsa? What's wrong?"
But the snow white blonde ignored the girl, putting her hands to her mouth and echoing the call. Several others shared glances; it had been two years since Elsa had told them about the voice she heard calling her, when she'd woken the spirits, only to find her true self. Nothing happened, no response. Taking a deep breath, Elsa tried again. When she got nothing, she sighed, turning to go back to the tribe-
It returned, calling out to her, and she turned back, gasping softly. Cupping her mouth again, she repeated the melody, her strong voice bouncing off the earth giants and rippling the streams. Several of the tribe shared glances; they'd never heard Elsa sing, in the two years since she'd been with the tribe, she'd never revealed her voice like she was doing now. It was strong, that was certain. Despite her years of isolation, she had cultivated a strong singing voice. Yelena, not having moved from where she'd stood earlier, made a note to ask the girl to sing at dinner.
The voice echoed her, and she echoed back.
Come on, secret siren, keep calling to me.
Silence.
And then another call. She listened intently for a moment, trying to track the voice. South, it was coming from the south- the route towards Arendelle. Without a word, she dashed off, following the river, listening for the voice. But she skidded to a stop, realizing that the voice was leading her further and further south of the camp; if it kept up at this pace, she'd be exhausted by the time she got to whatever it was leading her to. A moment passed, before she turned to the river she'd been following, an idea striking her.
Quickly, she knelt down, reaching out and gently swirling her fingers in the river. "Hey Nokk? I need a favour."
In a matter of moments, the water horse had appeared, galloping towards her as she stood. It stopped, and she reached up, resting her forehead against its muzzle as she laid both hands on its face. A layer of frost began to appear, coating the horse so it could gallop on land, and once she stepped back, she giggled, watching it prance around before stopping. It allowed her to climb atop its back and take the reigns, before she gently dug her heels into its sides and they were off, the wind at their backs.
She called again, listening as hard as she could despite the Nokk's hooves on the ground, and after a few minutes, she heard the reply. Gently, she tugged on the reigns, guiding the horse to the left, up into the forests. It followed Elsa's gentle order, trusting her. Of all the spirits, Elsa had developed a special relationship with the water horse; of all the spirits, it had taken her the longest to tame, after nearly being drowned in the Black Sea that long ago day. It was only after it had dragged her through the water by her arm, that she'd managed to conjure a bridle and reign, thrown it around the horse's snout, and then yanked herself up onto its back that it listened to her at all- after lashing around in attempt to throw her off. Several firm tugs on the reigns finally had it listening to her command; despite Elsa never having ridden a horse before.
Perhaps it was because they shared an element- water. For Elsa's ice and snow came from water, which was what the water horse was, essentially, the guardian of. An element shared between two spirits would make the bond between those two specific spirits stronger, in theory. But it was only a theory, much like Olaf's water memory theory.
Minutes passed, and again, she heard it; again, she called out to it, and again, she urged the Nokk to go faster. All too soon, they were gaining on it. Without a word, she leaned down, gently patting its neck. The horse seemed to understand what she was asking, and increased its pace. She called out again, heard it. As they reached a valley, the voice called one last time, and Elsa called back, only for it to disappear.
"Woah! Easy! Easy." She tugged on the reigns as they came upon the edge, and Elsa let her gaze scan the valley, before finally spotting it. A gasp escaped her throat, and she gently urged the horse down the slight slope. Her gaze took in the what was left of what apparently was a campsite. Bodies lay everywhere, caravans were destroyed or ransacked; clearly someone had attacked. The stench of death reached her, and she covered her nose.
She slid off the horse once they stopped, and looked around. Clothing and scraps of food, bodies and wood lay scattered about. It took only a few moments for her to realize who they had been.
Sigøynere.
"Gypsies."
As she picked her way through the destruction, something caused her pause. A soft moan. Someone was still alive amid the carnage and death. Scrambling over bits of broken wood, various possessions and bodies, she hurried towards the source of the moan, finding a man.
"Can you hear me? Hello?"
He winced when she reached out to touch him, and hissed in pain. A moment passed as she tried to think of what to do. She couldn't help him up; she didn't know the extent of the damage. She couldn't get him onto the Nokk, and it would take too long to get back to the tribe, and God only knew if he'd still be alive by the time she returned... she glanced back at the Nokk, before turning back to the man. He was covered in perspiration, and seemed to be having difficulty breathing. After a moment, she reached up, focusing all her energy on being able to move the wagon his leg was pinned under. A blast of ice shot out, and the toppled wagon moved. As she watched it, an idea struck her.
Taking a deep breath, she extended a hand. "Please, Yelena... we need help..."
A blast of snowflakes shot into the air from her palms. The man groaned, and she turned back to him. Without a word, she hurried back to him, reaching out and pulling his head into her lap. He cried out, and she reached down, gently tugging at his shirt. His chest was black, blue and purple, like he'd been beat. There were gashes in his side and what looked like the signs of internal bleeding. He grunted in pain, and she reached down, resting a hand against his forehead, being careful to brush his ginger hair away. "Shh, shh. It's okay. I'm here. I'm right here. You're okay, you're safe."
She continued to stroke his hair, unsure of whether Yelena had gotten her message or not. The man hissed with another breath, and reached up, but she grabbed his wrist when he reached for his side. He struggled only briefly, before the cool touch of her skin calmed him, and he relaxed. For a moment, Elsa feared his body had given up and he'd passed into the next world, but she realized he was clenching his teeth to keep from crying out. Once he stopped fighting her, she released his hand and gently moved her fingers over his skin, hoping her cool touch brought a little relief while they waited. It seemed to do the trick, as his cries were now soft whimpers.
He looked up at her, his eyes unfocused due to pain and blood loss, and she continued stroking her fingers through his hair. "Shh. It's okay. Help is coming." She bit her lip, hair falling over her shoulder. "Can you tell me what happened?"
Several minutes passed, before he finally managed to choke out, "B... bandi..."
"Bandits?" She finished, and he whimpered in response. A soft sob escaped her throat. Bandits were a common sight in the mountains and hills further east; they usually attached caravans, so it wasn't a surprise that they'd attack the gypsies. Gypsies were thought to be quite wealthy, when in fact they were simple people, who took on more of a traveling entertainment role, performing tricks and telling fortunes for coins in various towns before moving on. Elsa remembered the first time she'd ever seen a gypsy fortune teller before Anna's accident. "Fairytales and hokum," her father had called them, but Elsa wasn't so sure. If Gypsies were, then weren't the trolls also in the same category? And, for that matter, what about her? If she looked at it that way, then she herself fell into the hokum category.
He cried out, and Elsa stopped stroking his head, turning her own to stare at him. She lifted her hand away, horrified when her fingers came back sticky with blood. It was then that she realized there was a cut going from his hairline down towards his left eye- how had she not noticed that before? He reached up, taking her hand, and she turned her gaze back to his. "El... Els..."
She leaned down to listen, for his voice was getting faint. "I don't-" But the sound of hoof beats caused her to look up as Yelena and several others hurried down to them. Relief washed over her. So Yelena had gotten her message. They stopped, horrified by the sight. "Yelena!" Thinking quickly, she directed a flurry of snowflakes towards the stunned Northuldra, who were too busy scanning the carnage. In minutes, they were beside her.
"Elsa, what happened?" She looked up as the chief knelt beside her, and the man in her arms seemed to tense briefly, squeezing her hand.
"Bandits." She turned back to him, meeting his green gaze. He squeezed her hand again. "What? What is it? Shh. Shh, it's okay." She shifted her hand, so that he was no longer gripping her wrist. "This is the Northuldra, they're my tribe." She didn't notice the glances the others shared, at the acceptance in her voice. "It's okay, we're going to take care of you. I promise."
Yelena and the others watched in surprise as the young woman leaned down, resting her forehead to his and closing her eyes. "We need to move him-"
"Shh. It's okay. We'll take care of you, you're not alone anymore. I promise. You're not alone. We're here. I'm here."
As the pain took over, he squeezed her hand again, one word escaping his lips as his eyes closed and he fell into unconsciousness.
"Elsa."